Categories
antifeminism evil women hypocrisy irony alert johntheother men who should not ever be with women ever MGTOW misandry misogyny MRA neckbeard rights oppressed men racism

MRAs to women: You make us hate you! (Also, don’t call JohnTheOther a neckbeard. He’s clean-shaven!)

Racists – victim blamers extraordinaire — like to pretend that their racism isn’t their fault, that they’ve been driven to their racism by the bad behavior of some members of the group they’re bigoted against. Do a search for the phrase “I don’t hate blacks, but” and you will find thousands of examples of this “logic” at its crudest. “I don’t think blacks are ignorant just the NIGGERS,” one YouTube commenter writes, encapsulating the racist “logic” in a phrase.

Misogynists are fond of making similar “arguments” about women. As one commenter on the Scott Adams blog puts it:

I don’t hate women, but I have a pretty low opinion of women overall. I think they have poor priorities, they have poor analytical skills, they tend to be disorganized, they tend to be impulsive, and they think the world revolves around their feelings. I don’t think all women are like that, but it’s the impression I have of the gender in general, and I don’t like those traits.

Naturally, variations of this general argument (such as it is) abound in the “manosphere.” “Misogynists are not born they are made,” writes MRA/MGTOW elder and proud misogynist ZenPriest in an oft-cited rant titled “Hate Bounces.”

“Once, a long time ago when the world was young, I loved women with all my heart and soul,”ZenPriest (also known as Zed) writes. But then along came feminism, which ruined women so thoroughly that poor ZenPriest found himself more or less forced to become a woman-hater:

I began to see women as vicious creatures whose only agenda when it came to me, or any man, was to see how much they could get from the man – then when he had nothing left to give because they had taken it all, toss him out with yesterday’s garbage. In short – as nothing but users. …

I took to avoiding women, particularly groups of them, because I could never sit quietly and put up with the bashing and would always challenge it, which ended me up in a lot of fights and added greatly the count of times that I got called “misogynist.”

Gosh, why would anyone who “see[s] women as vicious creatures” get called a misogynist?

[A]fter 3 decades of listening to it, and hating it, and trying to keep the animosity which had been building in me over it … I caved in and began to really hate women. …

I will not allow most women in my house unless I have known her a long time and she is old enough to have escaped being infected with the plague of man hating or is escorted by someone I trust, nor will I enter theirs except on the same conditions. If I pass a woman stranded on the road, I will not stop to help her because it is as likely as not that she will be afraid of me.  …

I changed from a man who loved women and thought they were just about the greatest thing in the world, to a man who can’t stand them, or anything about them.

And of course it is all the fault of women and their alleged incessant man-hatery:

Man bashing and man hating harms women, because it makes men hate them back – eventually. A puppy returns love for love, but if you beat it will eventually turn mean and will one day turn on you when you raise your fist or your stick (or the club of words) to hit it. Men are no different.

As this last bit makes clear, this “she made me do it” logic is the very same logic used by abusers to justify their abuse.

Now our old friend JohnTheOther has offered a similar blame-the-ladies explanation as to why he’s developed what he calls an “indifference to female opinion.” In his telling, the straw that broke the camel’s back was some unnamed feminist who had the temerity to use the word “neckbeard” in an internet posting.

The culture of easy, casual insult by women against average men, creeps, neckbeards, mother’s-basement-dweller and so on, has a effect which might not be recognized by women. Guys generally don’t need to be told they’re held in contempt as a group, our wider culture makes this sparklingly clear. However, individual instances of circumstantial ad-hom have the very real effect of making men not care about women’s opinions.

Yeah, that’s why these guys don’t give a shit about what women say.

Naturally, Mr. TheOther feels the need to tell us that 1) he doesn’t have a neckbeard and 2) he has a (presumably human) girlfriend.

Am I a neck-beard? No, I’m clean shaven, Im not an online gamer, I have a girlfriend, a career, I dress well et-cetera. But whenever I see some casual, throw away comment like creeper, neck-beard or other minor belittling insult used to describe average men, it cements my not giving a shit about the opinions of women.

After being criticized for his blatant misogyny by a commenter in the Men’s Rights subreddit (virtually the only MRA site online where misogyny is ever called out), Mr. TheOther altered that final bit to read “it cements my not giving a shit about the opinions offered.” He evidently thinks that changing the wording of this one sentence, and complaining about “quote-mining” will convince readers that the misogynistic argument set forth in detail in the rest of the post somehow isn’t misogyny. (And, on the Men’s Rights subreddit, that ploy seems to have worked.)

Naturally, like so many misogynists, Mr. TheOther insists he’s really not a woman-hater:

I don’t hate women, I don’t believe in any “back to the kitchen” nonsense, or any other female-targeted belittlement. What I’m talking about is my personal attitude towards women’s opinions, their utterances, their writing, their thoughts, their contribution to society. If you are a woman reading this, that means your thoughts, ideas, speech, writing and so on.

Well, that clears it up. You don’t hate women; you just don’t give a shit what women think or say or do. Obviously there’s no bigotry in that!

Utterly dismissing “female opinion” because some woman called you a neckbeard: Men’s Rights activism at its finest!

Subscribe
Notify of
guest

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

213 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Ami Angelwings
8 years ago

If he doesn’t care about what women say or do, why is he so obsessed with what we say and do?

Ami Angelwings
8 years ago

I expect him to never quote from a woman again or react to anything a woman has done or said since he completely tunes us out. xD

ShadetheDruid
ShadetheDruid
8 years ago

…throw away comment like creeper…

…That’s a very nice pile of misogyny you have there.. Ssssss…

pillowinhell
8 years ago

Amy I only WISH they’d totally tune women out! Life might be somewhat more pleasant then.

And the idea of only being around a woman if you’re ( the man )chaparoned or the lady is in what, her seventies? That’s actually amusing.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

“I don’t hate women, I don’t believe in any “back to the kitchen” nonsense, or any other female-targeted belittlement.”

” What I’m talking about is my personal attitude towards women’s opinions, their utterances, their writing, their thoughts, their contribution to society. If you are a woman reading this, that means your thoughts, ideas, speech, writing and so on.”

It’s kind of comical how unaware he is of the fact that comment b disproves comment a.

thebionicmommy
thebionicmommy
8 years ago

If he doesn’t care about what women say or do, why is he so obsessed with what we say and do?

Exactly, he acts like he cares a great deal that some woman called him a neckbeard. He cared enough to write a long, boring blog post all about it.

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

Please, guys, GYOW already. If you’re so busy tuning us out, it should be no problem.

katz
8 years ago

David, can you please show a little sensitivity? It should be n*ckb**rd.

Fembot
Fembot
8 years ago

He’s complaining about being called a creeper, neck beard, or basement dweller? Wow. I guess he’s never been called cunt, whore, slit, ho, slut, bitch, cumdumpster, gash, split tail, or any variation thereof.

Those poor guys. Being insulted on the internet by women truly is the worst thing in the world!! Forget starving children, female genital mutilation, honor killings, boy soldiers in Africa— somebody called JtO a neckbeard!!!

thebionicmommy
thebionicmommy
8 years ago

I don’t hate women, but…

When a comment starts out this way, you know it’s going to be awesome. And by awesome, I mean crap.

David, can you please show a little sensitivity? It should be n*ckb**rd.

LOLOLOL. Also, it should be mis*gynist.

Freitag
Freitag
8 years ago

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=neckbeard

Definition #2:

neckbeard

Talkative, self-important nerdy men (usually age 30 and up) who, through an inability to properly decode social cues, mistake others’ strained tolerance of their blather for evidence of their own charm.

Ami Angelwings
8 years ago

I think I prefer John the Otter. He’s nicer. And more Otter-like. 😀

Ami Angelwings
8 years ago

@thebionicmommy Exactly. It’s funny that he doesn’t care what we say and then responded by saying I SHAVE MY FACE AND I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND. That seems to care a lot about what we think of him. >_>

katz
8 years ago

All in favor of flooding Anti-Manboobz with “neckbeard” comments and see how long it takes him to start censoring them?

Ami Angelwings
8 years ago

Most of what John the Other writes is a reaction to what women say and do. Like he got all bent out of shape about MRAs being called transphobes by trans women (unless he doesn’t count us as women which proves he’s a transphobe/cissexist). XD And he’s going around harassing Slut Walk and asking them questions right? So much for not caring what we say and do and think huh?

Ami Angelwings
8 years ago

We should flood Anti-Manboobz with every word in the dictionary. Like start with Aardvark and move down. Just use Aardvark to mean creepy neckbeard. Like “Stop being such an Aardvark to her!” And eventually he’ll have to ban that word, and move on until every word is banned xD

lowquacks
lowquacks
8 years ago

[W]henever I see some casual, throw away comment like creeper, neck-beard or other minor belittling insult used to describe average men

It’s telling that he sees traits that could be described as creepiness/neckbeardedness as characteristics of the “average” man.

Also, people should stop using the term “ad hominem” on the internet entirely. I don’t think I’ve seen it used correctly more than about 3 times in the last year or so.

Ami Angelwings
8 years ago

This is the most comments I’ve posted here in half a year. I see NWO is still around though xD Honestly, in 5 years, when David’s moved on and this site is just sitting here with no posts for the last 2 years, I bet NWO will still be here posting to himself and getting angry. xD He might even start arguing w/ himself. It’d be sorta sad : Like going into an abandoned theatre and finding a lone actor who can’t let go doing a play to nobody. Except y’know, with angry swears and misogynist hate and bizarre conspiracy theories. xD

Ami Angelwings
8 years ago

@LowQuacks it’s because John The Other is the most average man there is! He’s the perfect representation of how most men are! e_e He’s the hero of the common man! Anything he does and thinks represents what most other men think but will never say because they do not fight the system like he does. xD

thebionicmommy
thebionicmommy
8 years ago

Uh oh, Katz. If you mention anti-manboobz too much, Varpole might write another pointless blog post that nobody will read.

Fembot
Fembot
8 years ago

MRAs suffer from an overabundance of caring what women say and do. Why else do they so often have to clarify “I have girlfriend/wife/woman” to their critics? They still seek out approval from the very group they claim indifference toward. In fact, the MRA’s very existence is defined by his relationships– or lack theorof –with women. It’s ironic that if the MRM really didn’t care about women, and wasn’t so obsessed with policing women’s behaviors, it would probably vanish overnight.

lowquacks
lowquacks
8 years ago

I’m pretty sure JohnTheOther’s lying about not having a neckbeard anyway. I’m spiritually sensitive to such things.

katz
8 years ago

BUT IF HE FIGHTS THE SYSTEM AND NO ONE ELSE DOES HE ISN’T AVERAGE ANYMORE IS HE

And I approve of aardvarking. Let’s go for it.

thebewilderness
thebewilderness
8 years ago

He hates women because they are afraid of him?
I suggest that it may very well be the other way round.

Also how can constantly write about what women think say and do if he pays no attention to what women think say and do.
This person seems a bit confused.

filetofswedishfish
filetofswedishfish
8 years ago

He says this thing like it makes him exceptional or something. Dude, lots of guys all over the places ignore, dismiss, or manage to not hear or remember what women say. It’s actually annoyingly common. What you’re doing isn’t activism, it’s being an average dude who thinks half the population doesn’t *really* count.

Ruby Hypatia
Ruby Hypatia
8 years ago

I’m finding it hard to believe JohnTheOther actually has a girlfriend. She’d have to have pretty low self-esteem to be with a man who doesn’t care about her opinions.

Anna
Anna
8 years ago

I’m a n**kb***d! At least, I have these 3 granny hairs under my chin that seem to magically respawn at full length a few days after I pluck them.

I am so offended by that word boohoo

indifferentsky
8 years ago

“women” = monolith

I can address all of you at once, and I must say… I’m disappointed.

pecunium
pecunium
8 years ago

Ruby: Or with someone who thinks rape isn’t a bad thing… so long as it’s just the “right” people being raped.

Crumbelievable
Crumbelievable
8 years ago

So I guess then John doesn’t care about GWW’s opinions. Maybe he’ll stop doing that radio show with her.

Oh no wait, she has GOOD opinions.

Shadow
Shadow
8 years ago

David, can you please show a little sensitivity? It should be n*ckb**rd.

For real. I apologise to anyone who may have been triggered. Please don’t judge David by this momentary lapse, he’s usually much better than this.

nwoslave
8 years ago

Here’s good news. Women are better once again. There’s a study. Ann Kim said so and she’s from the progressive institute. Progressive is good.

“Moreover, studies in personality research find that women are more cooperative than men, more willing to compromise, more empathetic and, moreover, more polite.”

http://thehill.com/blogs/congress-blog/campaign/235097-elect-more-women-to-end-gridlock

It just kinda rehashes what women tell us every day. Journalists, politicians, talk show hosts, it really doesn’t matter. Women seem to have a knack for being better. Huh, I’ll bet women are better at researching studies that say women are better. It wouldn’t surprise me.
————-
Ya wanna know why, not only on MRA sites but in comment sections everywhere you read men writing stuff like this?

“I don’t hate women, I don’t believe in any “back to the kitchen” nonsense, or any other female-targeted belittlement. What I’m talking about is my personal attitude towards women’s opinions, their utterances, their writing, their thoughts, their contribution to society. If you are a woman reading this, that means your thoughts, ideas, speech, writing and so on.”

It’s because every damn day blared from our schools, the white house, the MSM it’s the same shit. Women telling us how they’re better at every damned thing that ever existed. And if there happens to be something they’re not better at it’s because men are holding them back. And there’s always a study. Ann Kim said there was a study and by golly I’m sure there is.

Fembot
Fembot
8 years ago

@Anna

Me too! LOL

blitzgal
8 years ago

I don’t get it. Why does hair on your neck make you “slovenly” and “nerdy?” I’m serious; I don’t understand how the term originated.

Polliwog
Polliwog
8 years ago

I don’t get it. Why does hair on your neck make you “slovenly” and “nerdy?” I’m serious; I don’t understand how the term originated.

I think the idea is that the “neckbeard” is a result of doing nothing at all to groom your facial hair, but just letting it grow however it likes, even if the result is unkempt and unflattering. So, basically, the supposed terrible insult is “you don’t care a whole lot about conforming to conventional standards of attractiveness!”

gainsbourg
gainsbourg
8 years ago

I don’t get this whole women are disorganized garbage. Without my mom, my father would be as helpless as a toddler, even though he flies a damn 747 for a living. It’s the same thing for all of my parents’ friends and every older couple I’ve ever met. With couples in my age group things are a bit more equal, but you still see the wife taking care of the important stuff like running the house and taking care of the kids while holding down a full time job just like her husband does.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

Ami! Where have you been?

On another note, I’m also unsure as to how “neckbeard” became a thing. It seems to be an insult that sprang fully formed from the bowels of the internet and suddenly everyone knew what it meant by osmosis.

indifferentsky
8 years ago

“I’m finding it hard to believe JohnTheOther actually has a girlfriend. She’d have to have pretty low self-esteem to be with a man who doesn’t care about her opinions.”

Makes me wonder, too. Either she’s a GWW type, or he’s a different person with her, or his gf IS GWW.

Oooh pass the brain bleach.

cloudiah
8 years ago

Honestly? I don’t care one way or another if JtO has a beard, or a girlfriend, or hates fried foods, or enjoys science fiction. I’m only concerned with his actions as a representative of the MRM and AVfM.

ShadetheDruid
ShadetheDruid
8 years ago

I think neckbeard is just the result of the stereotype of people with them being professors, IT experts, basically nerdy/geeky types, and it just got lumped in with the rest of the insults that come from the same source (basement dweller, lives with parents, useless with women etc) as another way of saying “loser”.

indifferentsky
8 years ago

Also, those guyses like to say that us guyses conflate women w/ feminists. And they say women =/= feminists. And I always thought when I saw that, no YOU guyses are doing that.

So here’s my example. When pressed, JTO would backtrack and say “feminists” unless he would say, ok, all women except for girlwriteswhat, who is an exception and except for this other chick, and maybe this other mra bootlicker here.

But I think he just needs a reminded women/ feminists aren’t always interchangeable.
Moral of the story, only feminists are baddies? Well you know what I mean, in his mind.

nwoslave
8 years ago

@gainsbourg

Man helpless as toddler. Check.
Same for everyone gainsbourg knows. Check.
Wife takes care of important stuff, kids, full time job, she does more. Check.

You’ve got the makings of either a politician, statician, journalist or school teacher.

indifferentsky
8 years ago

I’m not concerned if he “has a girlfriend” but when he claims he dismisses all women, then you can’t help but wonder about real flesh and blood women in his life.

It translates that people would wonder.

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

Ruby, darling, someone with beliefs as offensive as yours really shouldn’t be speculating about the self-esteem of others.

themisanthropicmuse
8 years ago

@indifferentsky:
You wrote: “But I think he just needs a reminded women/ feminists aren’t always interchangeable.”

IMO, many MRAs see women as all different stripes as having one similar trait: ie. they hate or want to use men. So honestly, I think to them it is interchangeable. The only ones who squeak by as being a little above sub-human are self-loathing female toadies that consistently validate the MRM’s views on women like GWW. If she ever stopped telling them exactly what they wanted to hear, she too would be ripped to shreds in a nanosecond because she’d no longer serve her purpose.

Kyrie
Kyrie
8 years ago

hellkell, I think Ruby’s self esteem is fine. See, she’s part of the good people, which is why she’s never go to prison, won’t be poor and any harm that could happen to her isn’t funny nor deserved.

Fembot
Fembot
8 years ago

@themisanthropicmuse

“If she ever stopped telling them exactly what they wanted to hear, she too would be ripped to shreds in a nanosecond because she’d no longer serve her purpose.”

Many MRAs heap insults upon her and other FeMRAs despite their being 100% compliant with the cause. I really don’t know how they can tolerate the level of abuse they receive.

cloudiah
8 years ago

@ indifferentsky Oops, I didn’t mean to sound so judgmental of people wondering about JtO for any reason. 🙂

ersatzmoons
8 years ago

In the post, google is linked with the defense, “I’m not racist, but…” – I would like to point out this depressing/amusing website http://www.notracistbut.com/ that highlights posts that include such a defense.

There’s also a http://notsexistbut.tumblr.com/page/39 >_>

1 2 3 5