Today I’d like to present to you a really ranty old post from Masculist Man on his unimaginatively named Men’s Rights Blog.
But let’s do this a little differently this time. Let’s make it a little contest.
I want you to take a deep breath, loosen up your tongue, and see how much of his rant you can read, out loud, in one breath. (Just don’t kill yourself in the process, please.)
Why the militancy
That question has been asked by many MRA’s and the answer should be obvious: what has moderation accomplished for us? What has “niceness” done for us? Besides getting us deeper into this mess. Why be nice to an enemy that not only wants to take everything from you but would like to see you DEAD on top of it. Not only that but if you are a father with sons the average feminist would like to see your young sons dead too …
Oh, crap, that’s as far as I got. Deep, deep breath. Here’s the rest. It took me five breaths to get through it. See if you can beat me.
just because they are male. These Neville Chamberlains would have you believe they can accomplish peace in our time by making deals with these devils and just like any deal with the devil they get burned. Not only them but the rest of us as well. Then the moderates have the nerve to tell us to shut up or we’ll play into the feminist hands. The one thing that I think of is that if we stay silent we definitely will play into the feminists hands,the same if we play “nice”. If we play nice,just as we have for the last 160 years (if you include feminism as a whole) or for 40 years (if you are focusing on 2nd wave feminism) then we will continue to get fucked. Why the militancy? Because it is hard to be nice when you are getting assfucked in court (family to criminal to civil) and it’s really hard to be nice when society blames YOU for what happens in a “he said/she said” situation even though SHE IS THE ONE AT FAULT and it’s really hard to be nice and pleasant when you try to illustrate what is happening to you and/or other men in society when everybody wants to play the ostrich and would rather not know,that is until another “he said/she said” situation arises again and then it’s boom,they back off to the races to repeat the same mistakes as last time and when they do they are applauded by the lemmings that make up society lest they are labelled “politically incorrect”. It seems they would rather kill their own families to avoid being labelled “politically incorrect”. A big problem with moderates is that they are usually staffed by older manginas or young men from single mother homes that don’t want to upset women and that there defeats the purpose of being an MRA because if you don’t upset women then you will stay silent concerning mens’ issues and the women win by your silence. TO ERODE WOMEN’S POWER OVER MEN ONE MUST SPEAK UP AND DESTROY THE FEMINSIT MONSTER THAT WANTS TO DESTROY YOU AND YOUR BROTHERS.
Instead of asking why the militancy one should ask is the militancy legitimate? and the answer is “yes”.
Post your results below!
*shrug*
I’ve met people who talk and act abusively toward animals even though they appear to act charmingly to other human beings. I have taken a cue and stayed the hell away from them. Not all abusive people are the same, and it’s never a victim’s fault for being victimized by an abuser, no matter what method said abuser uses. I just think that one of the things about most people (and women especially because of socialization and dominant cultural teaching) is that we’re more willing to call out abusive behavior when it’s not affecting us directly. It can be easier or more of an immediate impetus to stand up to it when someone other than the Self is at risk. Obviously, this is not always true, but it *can* help, and in some instances, it has been enough of a tipping point for a victim to crawl out of the delusion that “everything is ok, it’s just all my fault” and realize that they are in a bad situation and begin finding ways to seek help.
I am not even sure why you felt the need to say that having pets might reduce possible abuse. Abusers are usually cunning, and find ways to keep you in a relationship.
Most people have a certain point where they say enough is enough, and maybe their partner talking about harming their pet or actually harming them is enough to make a person leave but its not going to make everyone leave. Its plain ridiculous to say having a pet is always more likely to keep you out of abusive relationships.
By the time my abusive partner actually hit a dog that we were puppy-sitting together, I was far enough down the rabbit hole that I thought through my shock: “well, I guess maybe my philosophies on dog training could be wrong? I mean, he wouldn’t do that if it was bad, right?” So… that happened.
I wish I had defended her, or made us leave, or something. I didn’t.
@viscaria
arg *hugs* >_<
@nanasha
You say that its not victim blaming yet you still insist that certain things are more or less likely to get you abused. Its still victim blaming because it suggest that there was something a person could have done as a precaution to get out of an abusive relationship sooner. Also abusers warp your mind in many ways, something you may not find okay in normally may become something you let happen when you are in an abusive relationship. Because as the abuse continues and progressed it becomes normal rather than setting off alarm bells.
So which is it, something that only happens before people are already in the relationship or after? Both these situations you’ve said might possibly happen maybe are a pretty far cry from “having a pet will save your life” which is what I was originally responding to and don’t think is true at all. I I think the opposite is true, as Cassandra said if you care about your pet that gives an abuser another weapon to use against you.
Ug Viscaria I’m so sorry :/
……*sigh*
I have specifically refrained from using the word “always” in regards to these things. As I’ve said before, in my own experiences, I’ve let people abuse me a lot while also being heavily uncompromising when said abusive behavior has been directed at someone else (including an animal). For example, even though my own mother was HEAVILY abusive to me as a child, I wouldn’t stick up for myself. But if she started threatening my sister or my brother or my father, I would stand up and fight for them. I don’t know why I always did that- justified why I believed that I “deserved” to be called horrible things, hit, and generally treated like a sub human, but that it was unthinkable to see anyone else being treated the same sort of way.
But it was only in my senior year of high school when my mom’s behavior really went off the tracks (she tried to get my sister committed to a mental institution for “talking back” to her, and forced her to go on some pretty heavy sedatives after bullying a psychiatrist to prescribe them), and I had to get really intense with standing up to her. She started getting ridiculously religious and tried using it to control us, and I basically had to spend a lot of time fighting and arguing and manipulating her to convince her that she had come up with the idea to not send my sister away and was in fact in control even though she wasn’t. Finally, I graduated and I basically left- moving in with my grandmother and going to junior college on a scholarship so I could transfer to college after completing my AA.
I still don’t have a good relationship with my mom, but I’m forced to have her in my life if I want to be around my father (who is a pretty decent guy, but is completely under her control). It’s a tricky situation, but I’ve finally basically figured out how to shut her down when she starts in on abusive bullshit. Because now I can basically say, “I can leave if you don’t stop acting like this” and she pouts a bit and then storms off and drops it.
Bottom line is that I felt like I was “crazy” and “bringing it upon myself” every time she said or did abusive things, but watching her eventually start to treat my sister, brother and father the same way helped me to figure out that it was HER with the problem and that I needed to get out. So yeah, not an all or nothing situation, but it can help with perspective from within the abusive distortion storm.
Oh, thanks guys, it’s fine, that’s long past now. I just wanted to show at least one example of when animal abuse wasn’t a wake-up call for the victim, it was just another occasion to spin the “everything’s okay, it’s probably me that’s the problem!” brain wheels.
I feel guilty about doing n
nnnnnothing.** (darn you, Post Comment button!) I honestly didn’t even remember that incident until last week, when I found myself caring for a dog and it hit me all at once.
@viscaria
Its okay viscaria, don’t feel bad about it. When you get used to such crap it take a lot to make you realize that its really not okay.
@nansha
Not everyone is the same as you, they aren’t going to have the same reactions you did to x situations. Its great you were able to come to terms with it that way but not everyone will or can. Plus we were talking about pets not really siblings…
The problem here seems to be this pattern – overly general statement that doesn’t actually hold true in most cases – other people point out why it doesn’t work – no but actually I mean this much more specific thing – well why didn’t you say that in the first place then?
Whenever this happens in blog comments it always makes me both tired and frustrated.
Cassandra:
I think it’s the other way around, most people who display obvious red flags that don’t appear justified or balanced seldom get to a point in a relationhip where they can be abusive. Though everyone’s ideas of an obvious red flag, a justification, and adequate balance are different.
You’re welcome to think what you wish, but most work done on patterns of abuse within relationships does not support your view. Most abusers actively try to appear harmless and not trigger red flags at the beginning of a relationship.
To put it another way, the best metaphor for abusive relationships that I’ve ever heard is boiling a lobster. If you tried to put a lobster directly into boiling water, it would panic and try to escape. But if you put it in cool water and warm it up bit by bit, by the time it realizes there’s a problem, it’s already too late to escape.
Not that some people don’t see red flags early and manage to get away, but it’s profoundly unfair to abuse victims to act as if those red flags are usually or always obvious and easy to detect and act on.
I don`t even know what for, but that`s good news. The man talked about wanting to kill feminists with plastic explosives. He needs to be watched closely.
Nanasha, for what it’s worth, I get where you’re coming from and am similar to you in that I’ve put up with an insane amount of shit thrown at me and managed to find the strength to fight back only when that shit was thrown at someone else I cared about more than myself (which, in a couple of cases, was indeed a pet) – but then, I’ve also had an abuser kill one of my pets and threaten to kill others specifically to punish me, which kept me terrified and obedient. I don’t think there’s really a one-size-fits-all answer to whether a pet will be one more thing you have to endure the abuse in order to protect or one more thing to help you get away, or both, or neither.
Just dropping off a link to a super edgy “entertainer” (lol how so?) a friend of mine linked me to on facebook.
http://www.facebook.com/betterthanjesuschrist?ref=ts
This dude is a real charmer.
Wait! I finally got one: where does the 300lb feminsit? Wherever she wants to! (Provided the chair is painful for men to use.)
I figured feminsit was the first stage of a fiendish MRA plan to teach women the sort of commands that one might use with a dog. So there would be feminsit, and feminstay (useful for preventing divorce), feminheel (helps to prevent your lady from straying when out and about, and feminrollover (to be used when you want access to your pet woman’s vagina).
Petey-Nolan™ Ah… more of the, “if you don’t do what we say there will be great violence, and it will all be your fault.”
Then again, you’ve always been an abusive little fuck, so why stop now? It’s been so useful in the past. All those ounces of Troy Gold flowing your way from the court cases you’ve won.
All the time you get to spend in Australia, sitting at your ease on the beach. All the women flocking to your loving embrace.
Or not.
IR: Argenti, I don’t believe in destruction except in self-defense, and I think people and organizations in general should be subjected to coercion only when they coerce others. It’s okay, though, I know that lies and deceptions are common rhetorical tactics for the naive. I don’t hold it against you personally.
But video-games about women destroying each other to amuse rich-dudes… that’s just a laugh riot.
And the wonder that is lying, and misrepresenting (a la your fact-finding Lj), that’s just a reasonable pursuit of a political aim.
You are such a blatantly dishonest little twerp.
IR/FF/PP: I know that lies and deceptions are common rhetorical tactics for the naive. I don’t hold it against you personally.
Why not? You are, after all, willing to make the accusation; in a passive, semi-deniable, way.
Why not own your words, admit what you really mean?
Where is the courage of your convictions? At least Aktivarum isn’t weaseling about what he thinks. He can’t seem to keep a coherent thought in his head, and he denies that what he believes about, “seduction” is borderline behavior; and prone to stepping over the line from persuasion to rape, but at least he doesn’t dress his insults up as, “some people do this”.
This has nothing to do with the above but hellloooooo, Vagenda guys, you’re running a fine site there but only allowing comments from people who’ve bought into g-mail is incredibly frustrating.
Can’t afford the kind of phone that compliment’s that set up, plus connects me to to the entirety of all web media all the bloody time and frankly don’t want to.
It’s invasive and pushy and I object to the way it’s effectively silencing those that can’t or won’t buy into it. Upsets my left wing, democratic sensibilities no end.
Do something about it?
Manboobz, I am so sorry to spam you up like this. I love the freedom of speech in here but the cultural car crashes where UK and USA meet and fail to understand each other disrupt the discussion far too much, hence Vagenda.
Everyone I could be discussing (IRL) how the newer, rapey-er version of Tomb Raider compares to “I spit on Your Grave” is at at French metal festival and I’m at a bit of a lose end now. Again, sorry.
How easy is it to attach youtube bits here? Shall try and maybe fail…
All those MRA rants… I tend to read while imagining the sound wonky, fractured violins in the background. If you’ve heard Allen Ginsberg and The Kronos Quartet’s “Howl, USA” you’d get where I’m coming from but i can’t find that in youtube so…
(apparently you like Hamsters. And women in comedy. Miriam Elia’s “A Series of Psychotic Episodes” fit’s the bill and demonstrates those wonky violins for you)
Nolan:
So by some kind of evil, twisted logic you consider these vile murders to be our fault?
Bullshit! The only people responsible are the filthy animals who perpetrated them. I hope the all enjoy their life sentences.
Speaking of video games, anybody comment on The Binding of Isaac?