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Thank You, Hater: An utterly charming response to Internet trolls, in song and dance!

Here’s an utterly charming response to internet trolls – in song and dance! Thanks, Clever Pie and Isabel Fay! And thanks, Jill Filipovic of Feministe, for passing on the link.

Unlike the videos from Armageddon1115 I posted earlier today, this one is really worth watching.

You can find the full lyrics on YouTube; here are some of my favorite bits:

Well hello friend Mister Insightful

Thank you for your comment on my little Youtube clip!

Most people say you’re cruel and spiteful,

But you’re right, how do I sleep at night? I am a massive prick. …

 

Some might say you are a…

Sexually aggressive, racist, homophobe, misogynistic,

Cowardly, illitterate, waste of human skin,

Sexually aggressive, racist, homophobe, misogynistic,

Cowardly, iliterat, waste of human skin,

But I say: thank you beautiful stranger. …

 

I’m really sure that if I met you

You probably wouldn’t rape me like you promised that you would

We are like “that”; I really get you

You’re right about that laughing kid, he is a total “cnut”.

 

You wished me cancer and misspelled “cancer”

But I know that it’s a metaphor. You hope that I will grow,

Just like the tumour you hoped would kill me

Inside the tits on which you said you’d also like a go.

Pure joy.

And let me offer my own personal thanks to all the Man Boobz haters! Hey, “guy who posts on The Spearhead and elsewhere as Nugganu,” every time you tell me you hope I “get … anally raped one day. for real, yeah,” in comments from this IP address, and this one, it gives me yet more reason to continue on, mocking and exposing you complete douchewaffles.

 

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Ruby Hypatia
Ruby Hypatia
8 years ago

LOL. OMG, great video! Thanks David.

ragefromthebasement
8 years ago

Yeah, because the appropriate response to someone you disagree with is to hope they get raped. What a scumbag.

esty
esty
8 years ago

Lordy, this video actually made my day. Thank you for for posting.

lauralot89
8 years ago

Wonderful video. Now which of our regular trolls will be the first to pop up saying the singer is a stupid bitch who needs to die?

Rutee Katreya
8 years ago

Milkboy, Antsy, and Clueless n’ Nameless are hte only three remotely regular trolls at this point, I imagine, so my money’s on Milkboy.

katz
8 years ago

I vote for Buttman if we’re talking about hit-and-run.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

This is the best troll smackdown I’ve ever seen, and I would like to buy Ms Fay many, many drinks. The wanking gibbon cartoon was particularly perfect.

speedlines
speedlines
8 years ago

To comment on the singer would require paying attention to the OP, and not just wandering and copypasting something irrelevant, so my vote is none of ’em.

Kendra, the bionic mommy
Kendra, the bionic mommy
8 years ago

This video is great. Not only does it make fun of all the douchebags stinking up the Internet, but it also has a catchy tune.

ShadetheDruid
ShadetheDruid
8 years ago

This is awesome! I couldn’t stop laughing at the gibbon.. It fits the trolls so perfectly.

Also, “Buttman” sounds like a really bad superhero (i’m expecting someone’s already made that joke, but hey).

earthfae
8 years ago

I am so going to use that song in the future

Nerdiah
Nerdiah
8 years ago

Heh, “douchewaffle”.

cloudiah
8 years ago

the gibbon, oh god, the gibbon

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

“so my money’s on Milkboy” — seconded, though I doubt he’ll manage to be perfectly ironic and instead just be perfectly nonsensical, but he’ll probably do a drive by trolling, the post obviously contains a video with women in it, not even he could miss that.

Zarathustra
8 years ago

This is great. I may have to steal it. 🙂

LeftWingFox
LeftWingFox
8 years ago

“douchewaffle”.

Sounds like an obscure Belgian branch of the SS.

Popped collars on their uniforms, bermuda shorts, aviator sunglasses and slicked-back hair. You’d see them driving around in a lowered Volkswagon Thing with neon ground lights making duck-faces at the Allies.

speedbudget
speedbudget
8 years ago

How is it that I could post this in comments and Jill could send you the link at the same time?

Sigh. For once I thought I was the cool kid 🙁

Runic
Runic
8 years ago

The spurt of semen at the end was a nice touch. It isn’t often that I get to say that, but it’s true!

Helen
Helen
8 years ago

Wow that was brilliant !! Need to take in more good stuff like this and not get down through my masochistic reading of the spearhead or daily mail. Scuse bad grammar- on my phone. One commentator on spearhead currently backing forced marriage which has been outlawed in the uk. Unbelievable – so thanks for the good humour

Falconer
Falconer
8 years ago

It’s official.

The Internets? They have been won.

Congratulations, Ms. Fay.

Falconer
Falconer
8 years ago

Ooh! Ooooh! Just before 3:00 — it’s Rickey!

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

“My name’s Mickey!” XD

Nanasha
Nanasha
8 years ago

I’ve never smiled nearly so much after having to look at other people’s hate mail! THANKS INTERNET!

cloudiah
8 years ago

OT, except in the sense that they are consistently troll-like in their behavior: Paul E. and his fanboys have a bit of a problem with respecting people’s chosen pronouns. This in a post by Phil in Utah attacking Ozy.

TW for transphobia & homophobia wrapped into a big hate-burrito, and for general douchebaggery…

Sounds more than fair to me, because what I am hearing here from TheUnknown is that every time any individual wants to depart from convention that I am forced to make some sort of adjustment in the lexicon to accommodate for it.

Up the poop chute with that is right. If you have a dick, or the expected set of chromosomes that come with a dick, I am calling you “he.” I know, that is awfully bigoted and limiting of me, but you will have to deal with it.

I don’t begrudge anyone the right to identify in any way they want, or to call themselves whatever made up name of the hour they choose. But that is where their freedom ends.

windupmyskirt
8 years ago

LOVE this!!!

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

cloudiah —

“Tell you what…we will refer to others how WE choose to, and you can stuff your demands right up your ass.

Sound fair?” (from cloudiah’s link)

So they can stuff their demands that we not refer to them as assholes? Fair is fair… (asshole is the most polite thing I can think of currently, I mostly just want to launch into a tirade based mostly around the many uses of the word fuck)

Oh look, zombie Hilter’s been after their brains — “In my opinion there is no good Nazi, no good klansmen and no good feminist.” — closest they have to a feminist murderer is Solanas and she failed to actually kill anyone, so not remotely on par with Hitler or the KKK, thanks for playing, please try again! (Note to lurking MRAs, yes shooting people is bad, but not as bad as actually killing people, this should be fucking obvious)

I think I need to watch the OP again after that.

Leeloo Dallas Multipass

In social mileaus which lack any actual government censorship of speech, I notice that “Freedom of Speech” is generally invoked in the defense of ideas which have no actual arguments for them, as an attempt to frame one’s assholishness as a noble stand for free expression.

ShadetheDruid
ShadetheDruid
8 years ago

“In my opinion there is no good Nazi, no good klansmen and no good feminist.”

Is this another one of those guys who compares feminists to Nazis and Klan members, but is still super racist himself?

darksidecat
8 years ago

Not to mention that the Nazis and the KKK are both anti-feminist organizations.

Seranvali
Seranvali
8 years ago

That has to be the funnies, cleverest, answer to trolls that I’ve ever seen!

Maybe we should post links to that every time they show up. It says it all really!

karalora
8 years ago

The response I would give “Phil in Utah”:

If I think you look like a Clancy, I’m calling you Clancy. I know, that is awfully presumptuous of me, but you will have to deal with it.

I don’t begrudge anyone the right to identify in any way they want, or to call themselves whatever name they or their parents or whoever gave them. But that is where their freedom ends.

Also, how would Phil in Utah refer to a woman with AIS? She would have “the expected set of chromosomes that come with a dick,” after all.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

It’s this comment — so not obviously racist, but it wouldn’t surprise me.

darksidecat — amazingly, that’s irrelevant to his “point” that he hopes feminists will have to meet in secret — which would be more like wtf the Nazis did to Jews than like the Nazis themselves, but since when do Godwin arguments make sense?

Crumbelievable
Crumbelievable
8 years ago

But that is where their freedom ends.

We want to declare limitations on other people’s freedoms, but we’re totally not a hate movement, you guys! MRAs constantly amaze me for their ability to sink lower than I thought possible.

Nanasha
Nanasha
8 years ago

If I accidentally make a gender faux pas and refer to someone in the incorrect gender, I would like to be told what said person would like to be referred to AS, and unfortunately, because of douchenozzles like MRAs, most of them are uncomfortable being really open about it. I mean, it’s one thing to act horribly offended and be mean to me for making a mistake (but then again, a person is justified in reacting as they personally feel is appropriate), but ME feeling uncomfortable for being incorrect is LESS important than someone else feeling that their gender identity is being respected properly.

And I’m cool with that.

Kyrie
Kyrie
8 years ago

That’s awesome. The only problem is that I must now restrain to post it in answer to every troll I come across.

Interesting point, on the other people’s youtube videos in the clip, out of the 4 men, one is about his mother, one is called a feminine word, ‘twat’, one get racist a comment and the last one is simply called ‘not funny’. In the mean time, most women are threaten with horrible things. On the internet, the idea that the best thing you can be is a white man is very alive. I wonder is troll even realize the big difference in behavior they have with different kind of people.

Wetherby
Wetherby
8 years ago

I don’t know if this is because I’m British as well, but I was far less wowed by that than seemingly everyone else.

Production values were unexpectedly impressive, but it was at least half as long again as it needed to be (let’s face it, the essential point was made well within the first minute), and the impression I was left with was one of overbearing and ultimately stifling smugness.

Which is a shame, as I absolutely support the message.

GingerSnaps
GingerSnaps
8 years ago

So they can stuff their demands that we not refer to them as assholes? Fair is fair… (asshole is the most polite thing I can think of currently, I mostly just want to launch into a tirade based mostly around the many uses of the word fuck)

Creep.

ithiliana
8 years ago

I loved it!

Should keep around for future use — and am seeing it linked all over the place, as it should be.

valerienorth
valerienorth
8 years ago

That’s going to be the song that comes into my head whenever I see a troll.

Machine
Machine
8 years ago

Great video. Funny highlight on angry misogynists on youtube. Internet tantrums from group of entitled bullies.

Tulgey Logger
8 years ago

“Oh, and most of all, Ozy resolutely refuses to believe that any non-conservative woman should ever be held accountable for anything she says or does.”

Hah, wow. Citation fucking needed. And he wonders why Ozy would attack MRAs.

zing
zing
8 years ago

I find the song oddly inspirational.

Raoul
8 years ago

As a committed hater and part-time troll myself, I see the point of Ms. Fay’s piece, but nevertheless, I have to take the side of my people. I maintain that without a healthy minimum of unbridled free-floating negativity – or maybe a good deal more than that healthy minimum – there is no discourse, no insight, no creativity, finally, nothing.

We used to have to punch people out or throw rocks with notes on them thru windows to get to that level of reality. Now, thanks to the internet, it’s available to all. In the era of super-easy self-publishing and self-expression, this can only be a good thing. The hater is a countervailing force for excellence and toughness in a world overgrown with kind and accepting spaces. I am proud to call myself a hater.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Raoul — as a studio art minor, I must note that one can have a highly intelligent critique and discourse without punching, throwing rocks, or even insulting anyone. Then again, you basically just complained that the world is too nice, and I have to wonder what world you’re living in (and how I can come visit).

GingerSnaps — I’m going to assume that “creep” is a substitution for my “asshole” and not directed at me, please let me know if I’m being creepy so I can cease being creepy.

Raoul
8 years ago

AA: The world is what it is. The problem is people.

I like to say that a smile and a kind word can do a world of good for one person and untold damage to the common good.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Raoul — so when people ask you for directions do you just tell them to go to hell and turn left or something? No one here is going to say you have to be nice to assholes (misogyny we mock it) — but there’s a world of difference between calling someone an asshole and any of the examples in that video (eg “this cunt should be raped in the eyes”).

Or did you just not watch the video and thus don’t know the sort of troll you’re defending?

valerienorth
valerienorth
8 years ago

@Raoul – Some people call you hater, well, they’re just jealous. You’re right how can I sleep at night. I am a massive prick. LMAO.

I can’t get this song outta my head.

jumbofish
8 years ago

We used to have to punch people out or throw rocks with notes on them thru windows to get to that level of reality. Now, thanks to the internet, it’s available to all. In the era of super-easy self-publishing and self-expression, this can only be a good thing. The hater is a countervailing force for excellence and toughness in a world overgrown with kind and accepting spaces. I am proud to call myself a hater.

:I

You used to punch people/throw rocks through windows? You do realize most trolls aren’t capable of that um right. All I have to say is WTF is your problem dude.

jumbofisch
jumbofisch
8 years ago

Raoul the 50 year old troll…….

Tulgey Logger
8 years ago

Meta-trolling: trolling by pseudointellectually justifying trolling.

Imma take Raoul seriously for a minute here, and note that most trolling involves some form of bigotry, from racism, sexism, homophobia on down the line. In addition to merely mindless, spiteful hostility, bigoted trolling acts to support the status quo in a completely irrational way. Such mindless hostility is a net drag on the sum of human endeavors, becoming a gravity well for thought. Solid discourse, true insight, and creativity are antithetical to the stupid discourse, anti-insight, and unoriginality that is trolling.

TL;DR Quit trolling and make me a sandwich.

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