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No, women aren’t better than men. But the guys at A Voice for Men are doing their best to make it seem that way.

Putting women on pedestals: Not good feminism.

Roger Ebert recently wrote a well-intentioned but misguided faux-feminist blog post setting forth the thesis that “Women are better than men.” Here’s the gist of it, from his opening paragraph:

Women are nicer than men. There are exceptions. Most people of both sexes are probably fairly nice, given the nature of their upbringing and opportunities. But in terms of their lifelong natures, women are kinder, more empathetic, more generous. And the sooner more of them take positions of power, the better our chances as a species.

Here’s how to respond appropriately to this sort of argument, courtesy of Jill at Feministe:

I love me some Roger Ebert, but this is a big piece of crap. His point basically comes down to, “Women are nurturing and wonderful and non-violent, men are competitive and want to see boobs, because Evolution.” …  Most people are capable of great kindness; most people are capable of being total assholes. The degree to which any of us displays any of these traits depends largely on circumstance and partly on individual personality and temperament. Those things are certainly influenced by gender, but our gender does not in fact hard-wire us to be nice or awful.

Here’s how to respond inappropriately to this sort of argument, courtesy of John the Other at A Voice for Men:

[Y]es, it’s another one of those articles. Men are bad, women are good, men are worse, women are better, men are the worst thing ever, and women are just the best, squee!!! …

Ebert, in his attempt to ingratiate himself to a mostly female audience has done what countless other approval seeking men have done. Simply, to metaphorically prostrate himself – declaring – look, I’m a good man, not like those other bad men, you see how I heap scorn on them and flatter you? Approve of me!…

Ebert’s male-abasing and false esteem is a tired and monotonous repetition of standard gender ideology.

Sing along with me, you all know the words!

Women are better then men!

Boom boom boom!

They do everything better than them!

Boom boom boom!

 

Ladies are generally nicer!

Quack quack quack!

Their thoughts and feelings are higher!

Quack quack quack!

 

Girls and women are smarter!

Bing! Bang! Smash!

To keep up, men must try harder!

Clang! Bang! Bash!

 

Well, there’s a thoughtful argument.

Naturally, the commenters at AVfM are happy to join in the fun.

Shrek6 trots out the old “we hunted the mammoth” argument:

[E]verything on this earth from the knickers these women wear on their fat buts, all the way through to just about every single thing they touch in their day, up to and including homes, buildings, cars, trains, rockets, and the food they stuff down their throats, has all been either invented or produced by those useless ‘less than’ human, men. What a waste of space those men are!

Yep, I can feel a man strike coming on.

If all the men and boys in this world pulled the pin and sat on their buts for a month, the world would come to a grinding halt and anarchy would reign. All the women would be seen crying, screeching at men with gnashing teeth. Then they would eventually come begging.

Yep, that day is coming to these over indulged women. That day is coming!

Andybob, meanwhile, offers this analysis of what he sees as the gender enemy:

There are four main categories of women:

1) Women who care about the men in their lives, but never make the connection that their naked misandry contributes to the misery of these men. Most of those women who whooped and cackled when RegisterHer lifer, Sharon Osborne, expressed delight when an innocent man was genitally mutilated belong in this category. They would not have cackled quite so much if someone had brutalised their sons. Other women’s sons? No problem. It has ever been thus: white feather campaign in WWI.

2) Women who may pay lip service to caring about the men in their lives, but in reality, see them in the same way they see all other men – as utility objects to be manipulated and exploited. Such women don’t think of the men in their lives at all, except when they want something from them.

3) Feminists. These range from the mild (man-hating bigots), to the radical (man-hating bigots who advocate genocide and eugenics).

4) Women MRAs. These are rare women (I’ve never seen one, even in captivity), who regard men as actual people with collective and innate value. I can count them on two hands with fingers to spare.

Men have been struggling for many decades now with nary a peep from women. There is a reason for this.

They don’t care.

Feminism has provided today’s pampered princesses with the privilege-stuffed, consequence-free Nirvana that they believe they’re entitled to. Do you really think they can be swayed with reason and logic? Have you ever tried to discuss men’s rights with women? They will show concern for some imaginary, hypothetical female from some Third World country before they give two shits about the son, brother or friend standing in front of them. …

We are in a battle against a powerful, well-financed and establishment-supported entity which has succeeded in stealing our rights in every sphere. This has been done with the silent collusion of vast numbers of women. As such, a few “derogatory remarks” are the least they deserve.

Guys, I hate to have to tell you this, but you’re sort of making it look like Ebert might have a point.

Happily, I know that you all are statistical outliers, and that your raving misogyny (while it may reflect views common amongst AVFM readers, as evidenced by the upvotes those comments got) doesn’t reflect the views of most men. Heck, even some Men’s Rights Redditors are getting sick of your bullshit.

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Hippodameia
Hippodameia
12 years ago

I think Chris’s blog should be called The Most Super Special Snowflake Ever. Or maybe You MUST Care About My Problems!

Tedious little twerp.

jumbofish
12 years ago

Wanting help with sex as in wanting someone to actually aid you whist having sex? XD

jumbofish
12 years ago

*whilst

Argenti Aertheri
12 years ago

“The Most Super Special Snowflake Ever” — that’s already taken by AntZ, NWO, and he-who-shall-not-be-named (MRA…yeah him)

Argenti Aertheri
12 years ago

And, of course, Meller — some steep competition for “most special snowflake”

Chris
Chris
12 years ago

“Wanting help regarding sex in what way? I am serious too btw.”

What am I supposed to do? Just give up? I have no idea what i’m doing. I really hate myself sometimes. I let myself get too stressed out almost to the point where I feel like i’m having a panic attack. I feel like I want a girlfriend I just feel so alone sometimes. If I knew what to do I would do it. You called me a “strange sad man” well maybe I am strange I’ve never really fit in with people for my whole life and I don’t even know what to say about any of this anymore.

Hippodameia
Hippodameia
12 years ago

Maybe you should try saying it somewhere else, as none of us care.

Ithiliana
12 years ago

@Argenti Aertheri: Just about every blood relative I have is a republican of some stripe or other (not all are fundamentalist/social conservatives, but a bunch are). There are many reasons I don’t make huge efforts to visit family all that often because we really have nothing to talk about.
Or nothing we can talk about without getting into fights.

So, yeah, involuntary relatives. I’ve been a big proponent of “family of choice” for a loooooong time now.

I’m not kidding with my comments to Chris either–I have two vibrators, and I’m not afraid to use ’em! I’m sorry it took me so long to realize how wonder masturbation is, and how much of a change it made in my life.

Anything would be better than the spasms he has over here in his attempt to get…..something…from the people here.

Ithiliana
12 years ago

p.s. ok maybe not anything.

But hands, fleshlights, other sexual toys–you know, anything like that.

jumbofish
12 years ago

I feel like I want a girlfriend

That your issue dude. You feel like you want a gf. I should be that you actually want one not that you feel as if you should.

jumbofish
12 years ago

I just feel so alone sometimes.

A girl friend is not the solution to your issue. why not try to make actual friends first, hell that might even help you get a gf in the long run.

Ithiliana
12 years ago

@Chris: I don’t give dating advice. I’ve never had a ‘real’ date in my life (going to the movies with a guy I was having sex at times with is not really a date).

But: I don’t even know what to say about any of this anymore.
Maybe you need to stop saying anything about “this” (your lack of dating? your social awkwardness? Your lack of fitting in? Your blog?) for a while, especially here.

This is a blog that mocks misogyny. You’ve managed through things you’ve said to mark yourself as a misogynist to some extent (not the virulent, malignant, rampaging, horribleness of our Big Name Trolls, but still). And then you demand our help–male entitlement at its most typical.

And yet–what do you offer? I don’t think you’ve ever talked about anything/anybody but yourself–you cannot seem to talk about anything but your problems. My reading is that you want attention, and while you’re not willing to go to the extent some do (mumble mumble mdude), you just keep coming around with the same old schtick, and expecting something…..that is never going to happen.

Think about other things. Do other things. Stop defining yourself by one activity that is not in fact a constant in many people’s lives. Do. Something. Else.

And don’t keep dragging back here asking for help.

Plus, like I said, try masturbation.

There’s more to relationships than sex, but that seems to be the only way you define it. (Hell, my lifetime partner and I don’t even have a sexual relationship–that’s not important to us because of all the other things we share).

Argenti Aertheri
12 years ago

Chris — get thee to a psych, particularly if you’re a student and that would be covered under your tuition already anyways. Seriously — before you find someone willing to date you who is actually a terrible person, or you’ll end up freaking out more about the idea of leaving her and being single again.

In the meantime — your hands, fleshlights, other sex toys — all but your hands are available online (and since you’re typing, you should know where your hands are already). Or a sex worker, but you have to treat her with respect and pay as she asks. (eepp…is that promoting illegal activities? Ignore me if that’s not allowed/not legal where you are)

Ithiliana — w00t for “family of choice” — the rest of the family is mostly liberal — I have an aunt who went to woodstock frikken’ 8 month pregnant (“the music was excellent but the view sucked” — the cousin she was carrying) — my immediate family is, yeah, not so much. I also avoid family dinners (being 500 miles away makes that easy).

Argenti Aertheri
12 years ago

“why not try to make actual friends first, hell that might even help you get a gf in the long run.”

“Think about other things. Do other things. Stop defining yourself by one activity that is not in fact a constant in many people’s lives. Do. Something. Else.”

Both of those, yes!

And I’m really not kidding about getting a psych, one should not be having panic attacks over anything. If you’re a student you’re already paying for it even!

Snowy
Snowy
12 years ago

Or a sex worker, but you have to treat her with respect and pay as she asks. (eepp…is that promoting illegal activities? Ignore me if that’s not allowed/not legal where you are)

He’s said before that he’s near Nevada and so a legal sex worker would be an option, he just doesn’t want to. Which would suggest he’s not in fact “involuntarily” celibate, he chooses to be.

Hippodameia
Hippodameia
12 years ago

“You’ve managed through things you’ve said to mark yourself as a misogynist to some extent (not the virulent, malignant, rampaging, horribleness of our Big Name Trolls, but still). And then you demand our help–male entitlement at its most typical.”

Yep.

Argenti Aertheri
12 years ago

“He’s said before that he’s near Nevada and so a legal sex worker would be an option, he just doesn’t want to. Which would suggest he’s not in fact “involuntarily” celibate, he chooses to be.”

*head desk* …or maybe /)_- — either way really

jumbofish
12 years ago

You got problems dude, you need to learn it’s not our job to fix them.

indifferentsky
12 years ago

I really love that nightie and shoes in the photo a lot and I want them. 🙁 I’m shopping for things like that right now so I was startled when the page loaded. I want that and I would like it for free please. thx.

On to the post. That last blowhard really caused a short circuit with me

We are in a battle against a powerful, well-financed and establishment-supported entity which has succeeded in stealing our rights in every sphere. This has been done with the silent collusion of vast numbers of women. As such, a few “derogatory remarks” are the least they deserve.

“stealing our rights in every sphere”
NAME ONE.
This quote proves they’re really talking about being exposed as privilege and their fear of the *threat* of *possibly* losing *some*.

That’s why they bring up the mammoths they never hunted. Because they are saying ‘course men are privileged, because ______________ (utter crap).

Rutee Katreya
12 years ago

He’s said before that he’s near Nevada and so a legal sex worker would be an option, he just doesn’t want to. Which would suggest he’s not in fact “involuntarily” celibate, he chooses to be.

Conceivably, he’s poor.

Argenti Aertheri
12 years ago

Rutee — yeah, he could be, but then you’d think the inability to get a girlfriend wouldn’t rank as panic inducing *is poor*

Snowy
Snowy
12 years ago

If he is he didn’t talk about the cost being an obstacle, iirc he said he wouldn’t want a future girlfriend to possibly find out and think less of him as the reason.

indifferentsky
12 years ago

The legal outlet for him in Nevada would be spendy, and who knows what “near” is. The legal establishments aren’t ‘near’ to anything. If he wanted and could arrange it, that could be a one time option. I don’t know his concept of sexual relations, but for many people that would not include a stranger that was doing it for money. For some it does, for others, they would like some kind of reciprocal attraction encounter.

indifferentsky
12 years ago

Also as far as what snowy pointed out about future girlfriends, there is stigma. I think many or most men keep their visits discreet.

Argenti Aertheri
12 years ago

indifferentsky — having spent *way* too much time modifying patterns, I think that nightie is probably pretty simple to make, not quite free, but probably cheaper than buying one. The neck is two strips of lace cut at 45 degree angles, the rest is what looks like a pair of rectangles for the under layer (the bottom might be elastic, I can’t tell) and a pair of half circles of chiffon for the upper layer. Sew the two layers together wrong sides together before attaching the lace, and you should end up with something rather similar.

Lol, depending what size you wear, the underlayer could even be a recycled pillow case if you want to be really nearly free about it.

Back on topic! Well ok, there is still a stigma surrounding sex work, I was headdesking at “I want sex, but not from them!” — he’s only reinforcing the stigma. Also, his hands remain an option, even if he’s really poor.

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