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“Put that shallow tramp back in her place.” Or, Reddit discovers another woman to hate.

More proof that Reddit will believe pretty much any story, so long as it makes a woman – sorry, “female” – look bad. Even if there is some tiny kernel of truth in this story from AskReddit , there is zero chance that it went down exactly (or even vaguely) as described by Mr. Kickass. Redditors are terrible writers of fiction, especially when their fictions masquerade as fact.

Oh, and there are plenty more comments castigating this probably-imaginary woman.

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drockthecasbah
8 years ago

The, er, “female” was probably only bitchy because she had a millions of dollars in child support cheques in her purse and a trunk full of stolen sperm and was trying to make a quick getaway.
This kind of thing happens all the time in MRA-land. This story’s legit.

(Sarcasm, just in case)

Falconer
Falconer
8 years ago

(Also note that changing a tire is far beyond her technical skill, because woman. I mean, there’s five whole bolts there! The most a woman can possibly comprehend is three bolts.)

I’ve, um, I’ve actually tried to take a tire off once by turning the wrench the wrong way.

One time I managed to get all the nuts off, but the tire was stuck fast to the wheel and took two or three people working a lever to pop it free.

Yes, tires are not beyond the comprehension of an entire gender, but sometimes they’re not very easy to change.

The story is most likely made up. It fits too many MRA talking points at once.

LBT
LBT
8 years ago

RE: Falconer

Oh thank god. I was starting to worry I was just officially Too Puny To Live. (Why won’t you come off, lug nut? WHYYY?)

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

I can even believe that the woman was trying to change her tire, said “no thanks” to the guy because she thought she could do it alone, but then when she realized she was stuck went to the coffeeshop for help.

If any of it’s based in reality, that seems most likely. Particularly if the “offer of help” came when she’d first starting trying to change the tire. But in any case, the “watched her from a coffee shop” really is just weird, unless said coffee shop was the author’s destination to begin with? (yeah just weird, the time I did basically that I then called AAA, not went finding someone who might somehow wiggle the damned lug nuts loose)

Do MRAs get that not all men can change car tires either? (hell, the owner of the car couldn’t even check his oil, probably still can’t given his last project needed a 3/4″ wrench and he bought a 3/8″ wrench >.<)

And even if she said literally and exactly "I don't need help from someone like you" she could've always meant "cuz you've just randomly decided to insist I can't do this and should go wait in your car, creepy, no thanks

chocomintlipwax
8 years ago

He stopped to help a female?? Pffft, mangina/white knight/etc. etc.

My parents never taught me to change a tire, but I did have one of those emergency kits with the blanket and emergency stuff. And a AAA card. But no cell phone. And I lived in a flyover state, so finding a phone might have been an ordeal.

And the thing about flyover states is that people are really nice, so they all seem like serial killers. And we had our share, so unless you’re a lady over fifty I probably wouldn’t accept any help. Misandry, I know. Or I would probably sit in my car with the doors locked and the window open a crack, and ask the guy to call for help.

I don’t drive anymore, so it’s all moot anyway. When I was on crutches, going home from the bus stop, a guy stopped to give me a ride. I told him no, not because I was about half a block from home, but because I hate men.

Jawnita
Jawnita
8 years ago

Accept the drink but don’t have sex with the man and you’re horrible tease, essentially sexually assaulting the guy. Accept the drink and have sex with the man and you’re proving that all women are whores. Refuse the drink and you’re a hypergamous bitch that won’t give the poor schmo the time of day because you think you’re too good for him.

Clearly, you are supposed to refuse the drink but sleep with him anyway. And then never go to a bar again, because sleeping with more than one dude ever would be gauche.

Discordia
8 years ago

yeah you you big muscly man you!! sorry no one talks like that….The woman probably just said no thanks and he went off OMGWTFBBQ!!!!

Tulgey Logger
Tulgey Logger
8 years ago

Worry not: r/mr has its share of bogus misogynistic stories, too. During my one and only adventure in MR, there was a story about a guy doing some gardening or other type stuff with his class, and according to the tale, the feminist girls in the class (including the head of a feminist student organization, no less) were haughty and refused to work on the grounds girlsdon’twork, while the boys in the class stoically did their job and donchaknow feminists are therefore hypocrites. No, I’m not going to look it up for a link, that place is just unpleasant.

r/mr: a w e s o m e.

Shaenon
8 years ago

A couple of months ago, my friends and I actually did get stranded at night with a flat tire we were unable to change. There was one lug nut that just wouldn’t budge. Not even the good-looking man we’d brought along for just such an emergency (i.e. my husband) could get it off.

So we called AAA. Which is the way this story ends in the real world.

(We felt strangely vindicated when the AAA guy couldn’t get the lug nut off either, and had to drag out a motorized wrench thingy to take care of it. The problem wasn’t our weak girly arms after all!)

James
James
8 years ago
Reply to  Shaenon

The problem was your auto shop that used a motorized wrench thingy to put on the lug nuts and did not pop them back a quarter turn so that a normal human being could change the tire if they had to.

Always ask the auto shop to not tighten the nuts past normal elbow-grease levels.

Falconer
Falconer
8 years ago

Since Sr. Kickass has “helped many men and women change their tire[s]”

Aw, dammit, he’s ruining it for me!

Pecunium
8 years ago

James: The problem isn’t the use of an air-hammer (the motorised wrenchy thing). A calibrated air-hammer will use a torque loading that’s both secure, and removable.

“Popping” the lug back a quarter turn is actually worse than leaving it overtight, as that removes almost all the bearing pressure you need to securely seat the lugnut. It makes it much more likely a lugnut will work loose.

It’s also not a given the problem was an-over-torqued lug, at least not as described. If it had been all the lugs, then yeah, that’s the likely problem. if it was only one the more likely cause is that the lug, or the nut was damaged, and that allowed for bit of corrosion welding.

/removes machinist’s cap

Dani Alexis
Dani Alexis
8 years ago

(We felt strangely vindicated when the AAA guy couldn’t get the lug nut off either, and had to drag out a motorized wrench thingy to take care of it. The problem wasn’t our weak girly arms after all!)

I know that feeling. 🙂

I’ve pretty much given up conquering lug nuts, but that’s more because I have a bona fide shoulder-related disability that makes my arm strength even punier than the statistical adult average, and less because my arms are connected to a girl body. That’s why God made AAA, after all.

Remy
Remy
8 years ago

I have stopped to help a dude change a tyre. He was a muscly, good looking, rugby playing dude. But basic jack usage was beyond him. So he sat there looking awkward as this nelly-boy changed his tyre.

Thus I can prove that you do not have to be a virile heterosexual male to change a tyre. I assume I am part of the global assault on men being men, and am misandrist for changing the dudes tyre.

Or perhaps he’s misandrist. After all, he did not offer to sleep with me afterwards.

Pecunium
8 years ago

I’ve changed a lot of tires. Accepting that I am male, I’m still not “burly”. My mother taught me some tricks.

Get low. Put the lug-wrench so that it’s at the 11 o’clock position. With your arms almost straight, lean back; using your abs/legs. It’s sort of like doing a crunch. Pull as close to the end of the wrench as you can. Since most lugs will be on at less than 100 ft. lbs, this is almost always going to come free.

If it doesn’t, put the wrench at the 10 o’clock position and step on it. If it will bear your weight, without turning; and it feels stable, bounce.

If those don’t work… your roadside service provider.

drst
drst
8 years ago

I got a flat on the interstate once. My dad had shown me how to change a tire, but I was dubious that I remembered what to do, as it had been about 10 years. A guy pulled up to help me, fortunately. This was before cell phones, so I couldn’t just call AAA (and also the primary reason I got a cell phone in the first place). But it was the middle of the day and there wasn’t much traffic and we were in the middle of nowhere, and being a crazy paranoid feminazi I couldn’t help noticing the guy was driving a windowless van which my silly ladybrain always identifies as “rape van.” Fortunately a highway patrol car pulled up behind us. He just sat there, keeping an eye on things and alerting the other traffic.

Of course the guy in the van pulled away and I immediately told the state trooper he assaulted me, then fixed my tire. And I stole his sperm. TRUE FAX.

Smoochie
Smoochie
8 years ago

Meanwhile, elsewhere in MRAland:

OMG! It’s so unfair that people always think guys can change tires! You know the majority of tire related homicide happens to MEN! Why are there no rallies for that?1?!

Bagelsan
Bagelsan
8 years ago

I just keep thinking of some (imaginary) lady standing in a little damp pool of her own helpless lady tears, while our Brad Pitt look-alike hero strides by her all like “nuh UH bitch!” It’s the mental image that his fantastic writing has wrought. It sounds totally real and legit and like a thing that would happen. 😀

Ithiliana
8 years ago

*has been a loyal customer of AAA since the summer of 1993 when I drove myself and mah stuff to Texas in five days despite my grandmother’s laments that I had no man to attend me*

What’s funny is that when we get a flat, or other problem, and call the 800 AAA number, we usually get a service call center in Houston, and the poor person on the other end is flabbergasted that we cannot give her street names and cross streets (we are out in the boonies on HWY 224 or 34 or CR 1033 S and there is no cross street), but we haz learned that there is only one triple A rated towing service in the area, and we know who they are, and we tell the nice city person to tell the BB service where we are, and they know, and they will find us.

Amazing how surprised SOME city people are to find that there are human inhabitants in the wild wastes beyond the urban limits.

Ithiliana
8 years ago

Oh, and the nice young men who drive the tow trucks are always wonderful, and arrive quickly, and often offer a ride back to town if the car needs to be towed.

One time, when I got stuck in a muddy ditch that I didn’t realize was there just a half mile from my own house (I was trying to get down an overgrown driveway to an abandoned house where the people had moved out after foreclosure but left their Rottweiler–the man the bank sent out came down to our house and ask about whether people were there or not, or if the dog was truly abandoned, and I dashed out to rescue him), I tried to convince the nice young man that he needed a loving rottweiller (the dog was rolling on his feet, kissing him at the moment), but he said he already had three dogs, thank you, ma’am. So he towed my truck out, I took the rottweiller to the vet we work with, and we found him a home, happy ending.

Pecunium
8 years ago

ithiliana: But we know you secretly trained it to, “sic balls”, just in case some woman wanted to attack a man.

🙂

Jessay (@jessay)
8 years ago

LOL, we are seriously supposed to believe this?

I’ve had car trouble from time to time and I have never turned down the help of strangers, despite their looks. But you know what WOULD happen if I was to be assaulted by one of these strangers? It would probably be blamed on me. I should know better than to talk to someone when stranded on the side of the road you know.

I mean, this story is absurd. Even if it was true, that’s one shitty person in a sea of decent people. Nobody would see this behavior and be like,”Go girl!” because it’s cruel and ridiculous.

My issue with the story though is that, upon being denied his assistance, he just up and decides to go to the coffee shop and watch her. WTF? Is anyone else troubled by this tidbit? Because he said he was driving home, not driving to a coffee shop. So I mean, what, was he lying in wait for her to fail and come crawling back to him? Soaking up every second he watched her struggle? That’s some straight up CREEPER behavior. Any kind deed he offered is immediately countered by the following action. That need to be there to say, “I told you so” and gain revenge. What a nice guy.

Nanasha
Nanasha
8 years ago

I’m getting seriously tired of the misogyny coming from MRAs. Do you want to know what happened on Monday? Around noon, a man stabbed a woman he didn’t even know TO DEATH in my city because he felt that women had wronged him for far too long and he was never going to have a good relationship and so he wanted to kill some woman to pay for the suffering he had endured. He was only two weeks out of prison for a felony assault charge. The woman he murdered in cold blood was just walking on the sidewalk minding her own business when he jumped out of the bushes and stabbed her until she died.

I live in a small town, one that is not known for inner city violence.

I just have to keep asking myself, what will it take to finally get to a point where people will realize that these misogynistic attitudes lead to VERY dangerous thoughts and behaviors that dehumanize women?

I must also mention that many times if I’m having trouble, people refuse to offer to help me. I don’t really mind this because generally, when someone comes by and offers to help, a lot of the time their body language and their tone of voice indicates that they may have an ulterior motive for offering their assistance. Most of the time, when I need help, I ask others for it. It’s much easier to accept help from a stranger if I ask them politely and they accept because I know there is no shady reason they approached me.

When people get randomly stabbed to death by strange men for no other reason than she was walking down the street in broad daylight, you have to wonder- maybe the reason why women feel safe only when they INITIATE contact with strangers, it’s because of shit like this?

Hershele Ostropoler
8 years ago

Cliff:

(Also note that changing a tire is far beyond her technical skill, because woman. I mean, there’s five whole bolts there! The most a woman can possibly comprehend is three bolts.)

The rest of her brain is devoted to wanting equal pay.

Nobi:

Doesn’t NWO have some deranged, no-win, hypothetical scenario about women and car trouble?

AntZ regaled us with some ridiculous tale about

Falconer:

One time I managed to get all the nuts off

Tramp!

Hershele Ostropoler
8 years ago

Whoops, got distracted. Some ridiculous tale about picking up a hitchhiker and deigningto fuck a fat woman he moved into his house. Or something.

Jessay (@jessay)
8 years ago

Oh, and I just want to mention the miracle that happened to me one time. I used to live a backwoods region with really bad cell service, poorly lit roads surrounded by trees and not buildings, and horrible plowing services. So one winter night, on the way to my 3rd shift job, a patch of black ice sent me into a snowy ditch that I couldn’t get out of. I had no service and was kind of stunned because everything happened so suddenly. I sat for a minute trying to figure out what to do when a guy with a tow truck just happened to drive by. I guess this being a rural area, it’s a lot more common, but I was like SERIOUSLY? WHAT ARE THE ODDS? And then I turned him down because he wasn’t hot enough to tow my car out of the ditch.

J/K/J/K, he offered to get me out of the ditch and seriously saved the day. It was awesome.

indifferentsky
8 years ago

If this is true, he said something rude to her first, which … you know, is inconCEIVEable. It’s not like he’s some men’s-rights -mr.-yuck. BUT more likely that didn’t happen, because he said he didn’t know what she meant, and referred to his weight. So… unless this was a 80’s cliché movie, I don’t think so. Then again, I grew up around some pretty lackwit and rude social status conscious people. But wait… ok this is meant to be against FEMALES.

So… matters little if it’s true, right?

This dude. Smh.

I doubt she’d be changing a tire in the rain, why not wait a bit? THAT sounds like a woman to me! Sitting on her ass, late to an appointment she’s blowing off because of something so simple as a tire change and too squeamish to do anything resembling work in the slightest bit of weather.

Here’s the problem with the story that proved it never happened. If she did not know how to fix a tire, she would not choose that time, when it’s pouring down rain, to teach herself, what is the point? Why? This.never.happened.

I also reeled a bit at this first part about how he contemplates about his own mother or sister. Really? So that’s the thought process? Is that necessary? Why is he so gender focused?

Falconer
Falconer
8 years ago

So he towed my truck out, I took the rottweiller to the vet we work with, and we found him a home, happy ending.

Well, you’re obviously the most savage man-hater who ever hated, you, with your rescuing abandoned dogs and everything.

How do you sleep at night?!!

Crumbelievable
Crumbelievable
8 years ago

“Hey you look strong and muscly can you help me?”

This is how people in the real world talk, right? I never leave my computer so I wouldn`t know.

Reddit is officially the dumbest website of all time.

pillowinhell
8 years ago

Well it was clearly misandrist. She was probably buying puppy chow and feeding the dog right in front of some poor starving homeless dude.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

@Crumbelievable, I think I’ve used similar lines on established sex partners, but that’s more because the standard reply is usually “wait, you can’t do it yourself *dumbfounded*” — I can’t imagine anyone actually says anything close to that to a stranger, probably more like “You look like you can change a tire, would you mind helping me with one?”

Filter through MRA “logic” and you get “strong and muscly” (muscly totally doesn’t look like a real word anymore)

Unimaginative
Unimaginative
8 years ago

Some friends and I (at about age 20) were driving on holiday when our fan belt broke. I could have changed a tire, but was baffled by the fan belt. A passing motorist kindly fixed it, using my friend’s spare pantyhose, so that we could get to the next town and get a real belt put on. We thanked her nicely, and we all went about our lives. Yep, SHE was a very helpful passing motorist. There was nothing creepy about her, unlike the fiction-writing OP.

OSHIII
OSHIII
8 years ago

Did ANY of this take place outside of the writer’s head?

pillowinhell
8 years ago

Yes. The part where he put it on the internet.

Crumbelievable
Crumbelievable
8 years ago

Woman talks about rape, seeking help = What a lying bitch you are!
Man makes up implausible story about woman as an excuse to spout misogyny = Cool story bro!

I don`t care at this point if someone tries to tell me that not all of Reddit is like this. It`s enough of an established trend that I know I want absolutely nothing to do with that shitty site.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

“And then she knocked me down with her tire iron, stole my sperm, maniacally cackled ‘mwah hah ha’, and ran off. And then when her attempt at impregnating herself so that she could steal my future earnings failed, she filed a false rape accusation against me. I’m writing this from the county jail. The sherrif is a feminazi, so I’ll probably be shot at dawn.”

captainbathrobe
captainbathrobe
8 years ago

I’m going to have to agree that it never happened; or, if it did happen, she declined his offer of help initially, and he got all butt-hurt about it and decided to get back at her in the most petty way imaginable. The dialogue is so stilted and contrived that it probably represents his interpretation of what was said, rather than what was actually said.

So, yeah, Penthouse Forum would have rejected this story due to lack of plausibility, not to mention sex.

John Thomas
John Thomas
8 years ago

Futrell, and how do you know this isn’t some 14 yo frustrated fat kid writing this? He does say he’s fat. Then the good looking guy who just happened to be at the Diner takes the girl away from him lol

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

John, the writer could be a frustrated kid, but the nearly 300 upvotes aren’t all from teenagers. And the point was about Reddit in general, not the author specifically — “More proof that Reddit will believe pretty much any story, so long as it makes a woman – sorry, “female” – look bad”

Also, some other dude doesn’t “take the girl away” the girl (woman) chooses someone else. But like everyone’s been saying, this probably either didn’t happen at all, or went substantially differently, eg “do you need help with that?” “no, I’ve got it covered” and then he rushes off that drivel because she owed him! Her car broke! And we just did how women are not vending machines on the friendzone post, I’m not going to repeat all that again.

@Nanasha — “I just have to keep asking myself, what will it take to finally get to a point where people will realize that these misogynistic attitudes lead to VERY dangerous thoughts and behaviors that dehumanize women?” — sadly, I’m afraid the answer to that might be “it happening to someone they care about”

And in stupid car stories, my favorite was the day a friend and I were setting off for college break, 500+ miles, and I decided to check his oil first. Good call that was, as it turned out he not only didn’t know how to check that, but the dipstick came out dry on my first pull. So yeah, men can be just as dumb about cars. And then there was the time he was sure he had a spare, and I was still shaking from the whole blow-out in a blizzard thing. He didn’t have a spare, and had told AAA he did, so goddamned was I pleased that AAA had a donut of the right size. Which we then drove about 300 miles on before he tried to replace just that tire and leave the other 3 on (until they blew out too? idfk) — I veto’ed that plan. I am amazed that car lasted as long as it did though.

Dracula
Dracula
8 years ago

Futrell, and how do you know this isn’t some 14 yo frustrated fat kid writing this?

Well first, hurr hurr fat kid hurr. Congrats, you have all the wit of a seventh grader.

He does say he’s fat.

He also said he was driving home from work. Know a lot fourteen year olds with cars? If the writer was fourteen, then all of it is made up instead of most of it.

TheNatFantastic
8 years ago

Here is a Thing That Actually Happened:

About 18 months ago, I’d gone halfway down the UK to visit a friend. While I was there, the country was covered in snow. I got about 2/3 of the way back, using public transport, when we were told there was too much snow to continue. I was stranded with no money in a bus station. My cousin was the closest to me, and when I spoke to his fiance she assured me the walk would only take about an hour, but couldn’t give me directions. So I walked through knee deep snow to get to the motorway, then walked along the hard shoulder with the flow of traffic through a blizzard for two hours in their direction, until a grit truck with two highway maintenance men stopped and asked me what the fuck I was doing. After hearing that I had no other choice, they offered me a lift and because they were working, I texted 3 people to let them know what I was doing then got in the truck. I was very glad I did because as soon as I got in I saw a sign that said my cousin’s was 9 miles away. My cousin works in a pub just off the slip road so they dropped me off just outside his place. I thanked them profusely and was safe and warm and nobody was an arsehole* because that is actually how people work. I have stll never forgiven my cousin’s fiance though.

*LOL JK, totes stole their sperm and their truck because, vaginas – amirite?

TheNatFantastic
8 years ago

OH OH AND they were *gasp* average looking and too old for me to consider fucking.

BigMomma
BigMomma
8 years ago

is it just me or does the headline for this article make one think of this? (please embed please embed)

jumbofish
8 years ago

Futrell, and how do you know this isn’t some 14 yo frustrated fat kid writing this? He does say he’s fat. Then the good looking guy who just happened to be at the Diner takes the girl away from him lol

He could be a 5 year old gorilla for all I care and I’d still mock him for the misogyny he was spewing. There is no proof either way so I am not sure how its suppose to matter.

I am not sure why mras think saying they are all just sexual frustrated teens is suppose to matter or why they purposefully lie about how old most of their member are. Is that like the new coverup method for overly misogynist members or something? I keep hearing mras claim that x poster is just an angry teens whenever david finds a questionable post.

seranvali
8 years ago

BigMomma:

Thankyou, that was just what I needed to go with my hot milk and honey.

LBT
LBT
8 years ago

All of this has just made me very glad I no longer drive. As fun as being trapped underground in a busted subway car for an hour is, at least I don’t have to worry about FIXING the damned thing. (And I know JACK about auto repair. I can change a tire, add/check the oil, fill the tires, and that’s pretty much it.) Also, it’s never my fault! 😀 Wins all around.

Pecunium
8 years ago

JT (clever nom de net dude… such wit, such penetrating humor): Futrell, and how do you know this isn’t some 14 yo frustrated fat kid writing this?

Doesn’t matter. It’s the net. People are what they present. If you act like a troll, you are a troll. If you act like a decent person, you are.

The people who upvoted it didn’t say, “This 14 year old fat kid wrote a really cool piece of fiction,” they said, “This is such an accurate depiction of women I need to publicly agree with it.”.

Which is mockworthy, only slightly more mockworthy than someone who names himself after a eupehemism for a euphimism, and makes excuses for some other lackwit’s misogyny,

Thuja
Thuja
8 years ago

“I mean I am in my late 20s, a white male who is a little overweight”

Yeah, because if he was a Black male (otherwise known as a Black man) it would be pretty understandable. You have to watch out for those Black men, you know? All being Black and not White ‘n stuff. But to turn away a stranger at night on the side of the road who’s a WHITE guy? Well, that’s just wrong. She was obviously chubby-guy-hating bitch, and totally not fictitious.

Canaduck
Canaduck
8 years ago

Okay, that is the fakest, dumbest story of all time. It’s just as ludicrous as the “I’m gonna get the baby I deserve” tale about the evil female desperate for a condom full of her boyfriend’s old sperm, except that one, of course, was an intentional fake.

Even though it’s the middle of May, I like to think that “Joseph_Kickass” will come forward and admit that his little fantasy tale was another ruse to reveal the blind stupidity of MRAs and their desperation to believe anything, no matter how unrealistic, that makes women look evil…but I don’t have high hopes.

Falconer
Falconer
8 years ago

It’s just as ludicrous as the “I’m gonna get the baby I deserve” tale about the evil female desperate for a condom full of her boyfriend’s old sperm

One time I laid out a spike strip on the road and punctured the tires of an HB10. When she crashed her car into the guard rail, I ran up and asked her if she needed help changing her tires. When she told me she was calling 911, I told her she’d never get my sperm, dosed her with tabasco sauce and ran away, laughing. I really showed her!