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“Put that shallow tramp back in her place.” Or, Reddit discovers another woman to hate.

More proof that Reddit will believe pretty much any story, so long as it makes a woman – sorry, “female” – look bad. Even if there is some tiny kernel of truth in this story from AskReddit , there is zero chance that it went down exactly (or even vaguely) as described by Mr. Kickass. Redditors are terrible writers of fiction, especially when their fictions masquerade as fact.

Oh, and there are plenty more comments castigating this probably-imaginary woman.

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Cliff Pervocracy
8 years ago

shitthatneverhappened.txt

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

Yeah, that never happened. This dude should stick to writing to Penthouse.

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
8 years ago

What exactly is the point of making up this type of bullshit?

Cliff Pervocracy
8 years ago

Also the unspoken implication is that if a strange man approaches a woman at night when her car is broken down, and she gets spooked, it’s because he wasn’t sexy enough for the hypergamous bitch, and not for any other very sensible reason.

It’s the old “sexual harassment just means the guy wasn’t sexy enough” crap, but with a cartoonish fictional woman playing along.

(Also note that changing a tire is far beyond her technical skill, because woman. I mean, there’s five whole bolts there! The most a woman can possibly comprehend is three bolts.)

zhinxy
zhinxy
8 years ago

He missed a big beat by not having her beg for his help on her knees in the rain. I only give this tale of comuppance a 4/10. Do better, Men’s Right’s Reddit.

Blue Jean
Blue Jean
8 years ago

a young female trying to change a tire

A female what? Because no human of any age talks that way. Except in the hackneyed imaginations of misogynistic cave dwellers.

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
8 years ago

Doesn’t NWO have some deranged, no-win, hypothetical scenario about women and car trouble?

Cliff Pervocracy
8 years ago

A better writer would have at least specified why she was having trouble changing the tire. Could she not get the car jacked up? Not turn the lug wrench? Not pull the tire off the bolts? Not get her spare tire out of the trunk?

The image of a woman just standing there in the rain, tire-ing as hard as she can, but just not tire-ing hard enough, screams bad fiction writer.

Cliff Pervocracy
8 years ago

…And once again, also (I’m having a lot of alsos) a woman is called a tramp for not being sexually interested in enough men.

This is backwards talk even in your own sexist language, dudes!

Kyn
Kyn
8 years ago

I… guess I believe that someone changing a tire in the rain said “no thanks, I got this” to Mr. Joe Self-Congratulatory Knight In Shining Asshole?

The rest does sound a lot like “story he made up to soothe his tender feelings”. No, she didn’t decline his help because she [is competent to change a tire/ was mostly finished with the task/ was reasonably suspicious of him for any number of reasons], she wanted help from a hottie, not an average-looking guy! Strangely, the author doesn’t throw in any description of the woman at all. You’d think a misogynist with hurt fee-fees and a literary bent would toss some “manicured nails” on her just to make his point, so I think it’s possible the talked-to-broken-down-driver bit actually happened, and the rest was composed while driving away fuming.

pillowinhell
8 years ago

And I have to wonder, what else was he saying or doing to get the “not from someone like you” comment, in the unlikely event this story really happened. Seems a rather pointed comment to someone you’ve just met.

Kendra, the bionic mommy
Kendra, the bionic mommy
8 years ago

He forgot the part where the woman stole his sperm to punish him for not changing his tire. However, he got the last laugh because the sperm didn’t get her pregnant, so now she is ALONE WITH HER CATS!

Seriously, though, I’m tired of these tall tales of women in need of roadside assistance from manly heroes. I have a 12 volt air compressor, a scissor jack, a lug wrench, and an extra tire in my trunk. I also have jumper cables, a blanket, a flashlight with extra batteries, an ice scraper, and a first aid kit. I have a cellphone that I can use to call for roadside assistance, too. I even have a phone charger that can hook up to a cigarette lighter to cover all my bases. I have had three flat tires in the last year from running over nails and trash, and not once did I ask for help from a stranger on the side of the road.

Cliff Pervocracy
8 years ago

I can even believe that the woman was trying to change her tire, said “no thanks” to the guy because she thought she could do it alone, but then when she realized she was stuck went to the coffeeshop for help.

I mean, none of this actually happened, but that makes more sense than “only the most beautiful men are allowed to help me change a tire, because apparently I care about Alpha Thugs more than I care about getting out of the rain.”

Kyn
Kyn
8 years ago

P.S. Another part of this story that I uncharitably doubt: Mr. Kickass is totally egalitarian in his offers of roadside service, and has stopped many times to help men, women, and couples with their car breakdowns! Not just single women — er, “females” — he deems sufficiently hot.

ManiacalNewWorld
ManiacalNewWorld
8 years ago

If it’s true then I am sure it was more because he was the type of guy who would watch you from inside a restaurant. I was creeped out when he wrote that she could sit in the car while he did it. I’m not sure why that line bothered me so much. But I love how one guy called her a gold digger. Lmao

LBT
LBT
8 years ago

I have needed help changing my tire before. It was two situations: one, the lug nuts were so fucking tight that throwing my whole puny weight against them weren’t enough. I was in the parking lot of a gas station, so I walked in and asked the attendant, who wasn’t much less skinny but still taller than me, thus heavier. With a lot of weight-hurling, he managed to loosen the lug nuts, and then with great thanks I managed the rest.

The other time, it was dark, no street lights, and no shoulder, so I had the choice of either trying to change a tire in the dark while wedged against the curb, or turning the car around so I had space but faced the traffic coming at me. I was a high school student at the time, and wasn’t sure what would be safest/smartest, plus I was worried I’d screw it up and somehow damage the car more, so I called my dad.

I felt like a complete doofus both times. The gas station time, I was an adult and in daylight, so would’ve happily accepted help from anyone. As a kid alone in the dark, though… I would’ve been a lot more nervous.

At least I wasn’t getting rained on!

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
8 years ago

I can even believe that the woman was trying to change her tire, said “no thanks” to the guy because she thought she could do it alone, but then when she realized she was stuck went to the coffeeshop for help.

This This could be the bean of truth from which the rest of this ridiculous stalk of a story sprouted. Everything else is the product of the author’s own insecurities and prejudices.

And that’s still assuming that the whole thing isn’t completely made up.

Ruby Hypatia
Ruby Hypatia
8 years ago

Sounds like a made up story to me. Reminds me of all the guys who claim that they get yelled at by women for opening doors for them.

Cliff Pervocracy
8 years ago

I was creeped out when he wrote that she could sit in the car while he did it. I’m not sure why that line bothered me so much.

Because the car is jacked up! I’m not getting into a car while it’s up on the jack!

Either that or he means his car, which is entirely creepy. Rule 1 of Stranger Danger is never get in the car.

Kendra, the bionic mommy
Kendra, the bionic mommy
8 years ago

Doesn’t NWO have some deranged, no-win, hypothetical scenario about women and car trouble?

Yeah, NWO asked me specifically if I would get scared if some stranger approached me at night on a deserted highway to help me with a flat tire. In his hypothetical story, I am stuck at the side of the road, and a man parks twenty feet behind to approach me and see if I need help. His hypothetical Kendra was an evil misandrist, of course, and thinks the guy is creepy even though he honestly just wants to help. The moral of the story was that all strangers are safe, and any woman who doesn’t trust a stranger right off the bat is a misandrist (or something, this is NWO we’re talking about, so I’m doing my best to figure out what he was ranting about).

GingerSnaps
GingerSnaps
8 years ago

Even if I assume this story is completely, entirely, 100% factually correct EXACTLY as presented, I don’t understand why the guy would have said that before flouncing. A real Good Samaritan would have been like “Yeah, sure,” and if they were REALLY disturbed by her previous comment, they could have been like “Hey, now that we’re done changing the tire, is there something I did/said in my approach to make you wary of me earlier? Sorry for putting you off, but I’d like to know so I don’t do it again next time.” Or whatever. I mean, if you were really nice, why not just…. ugh.

Which leads me to believe that he expected something from the encounter. The only way “I approached a woman in need of a tire change after dark in the pouring rain on the side of the highway, just like the start of every serial killer tv show evah!, and she DIDN’T WANT MY HELP!” could lead to the amount of SMUG! COOL! COMEUPPANCE! that barely disguises his seething “rejection” rage was if he didn’t just want to help a person, who happened to be a female person, change a tire, but if he expected something in return for his actions.

Creepy.

TheNatFantastic
8 years ago

I don’t drive. People think that’s because it’s ridiculously expensive and unnecessary where I live, but actually I just hate men and don’t want to run the risk of an unattractive one offering to help me.

/sarcasm

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
8 years ago

If the “shallow tramp” in question was really just waiting for the handsomest stranger to assist her with the impossible -for, you know, a woman- task of changing a flat tire, why on earth would she sit out in the rain getting soggier by the second? Wouldn’t she have just walked directly into the coffee ship and approached the best looking guy there?

Also: “…strong and muscly…”?

It occurs to me that I have had occasion to be short with men who were offering me assistance. But only after I’d declined their help politely, thanking them for the offer, and their persistence became directly flirtatious and segued into hostility.

Cliff Pervocracy
8 years ago

I’ve turned down guys who offered to help me with a tire, but this was because:
A) I can change a tire myself, thanks
and
B) I don’t want to be alone in an isolated area with a strange man while I have no means of transportation.

I really hope none of them went away thinking it was a sexual rejection, because holy shit if you think that then I really don’t want to be alone with you.

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
8 years ago

Yeah, NWO asked me specifically if I would get scared if some stranger approached me at night on a deserted highway to help me with a flat tire. In his hypothetical story, I am stuck at the side of the road, and a man parks twenty feet behind to approach me and see if I need help.

Now, I remember. Like most NWO hypotheticals it was an idiotic attempt at a “gotcha” combined with his standard “the woman is a misandrist bitch no matter what she does” world view. Like his whole woman-offered-a-drink-in-a-bar, obsession. How does that song go?

Accept the drink but don’t have sex with the man and you’re horrible tease, essentially sexually assaulting the guy. Accept the drink and have sex with the man and you’re proving that all women are whores. Refuse the drink and you’re a hypergamous bitch that won’t give the poor schmo the time of day because you think you’re too good for him.

You know, barring circumstances of having the wrong tools, too tight lug-nuts, etc., most women I know who can drive have changed a flat tire at some point.

MissPrism
MissPrism
8 years ago

What a strange coincidence! Exactly the same thing didn’t happen to me. Except that in my case, the shallow tramp said “Why thank you! While you do that mendy thing on my broken car whatsit, I will go to that coffee shop, where it is warm and dry, and sexually proposition that handsome man I can see through the window.” Bitch didn’t even offer to bring me back a latte.

Cliff Pervocracy
8 years ago

But when did she steal your sperm?

Joven
Joven
8 years ago

Clearly she was an assassin, trying to lure her target, or as a setup for a good firing position. When the target presented itself, she silently executed him, and then figured shed end the night with some random dude she met in a coffee shop, and some pie.

The guy was lucky, she totally would have killed him if he had kept insisting, thats why I never offer to help strange women alone, too risky.

chibigodzilla
8 years ago

A better writer would have at least specified why she was having trouble changing the tire. Could she not get the car jacked up? Not turn the lug wrench? Not pull the tire off the bolts? Not get her spare tire out of the trunk?

This. Since Sr. Kickass has “helped many men and women change their tire[s]” he should be well versed in the tire changing process and would know exactly what step this “young female” was having trouble with.

pillowinhell
8 years ago

Well see, clearly the problem she was having trouble with was being a female driver, amiright?

Blue Jean
Blue Jean
8 years ago

That’s nothing. I remember the last time there was a firestorm, and I offered to start this guy’s hover car for him while I shielded his fragile self from the fire with my amazing Inviso powers. He sneered at me and said “I wouldn’t let someone like you touch the dirt I walk on, never mind my hover car.”

So I sat down and watched him for the next three hours (nothing creepy or anything like that) while he struggled with the hover car and he got third degree burns. He batted his eyes flirtatiously and asked Beyonce, Angelina Jolie, and the current Miss Universe for help, but they all turned him down, then they killed him and danced around on his grave singing “Halleluah!”

For realz!

zhinxy
zhinxy
8 years ago

Actually, this was in Ask Reddit.

Ah!

In that case… I don’t know whether to raise or lower my standards for made-up Tales of Them Bitches.

Medium Dave
8 years ago

Whenever this topic comes up, I never tire (haha) of pointing out that the one time in my life that a stranger (who wasn’t a police officer) stopped to help me when I had a flat, it was a woman. 😀

cloudiah
8 years ago

The original story would have been much better with a picture of that shallow tramp.

Cliff Pervocracy
8 years ago

The appearance thing can go either way. If she’s good-looking it proves she’s stuck-up and used to men fawning over her. If she’s ugly it proves she doesn’t know how lucky she is to have a man pay her any attention at all.

If she’s average-looking it’s [DOES NOT COMPUTE, women are either boner-makers or non-boner-makers, DOES NOT COMPUTE]

carswell
carswell
8 years ago

He forgot the part where the woman stole his sperm to punish him for not changing his tire. However, he got the last laugh because the sperm didn’t get her pregnant, so now she is ALONE WITH HER CATS!

This made me laugh out loud.

Lady Zombie
Lady Zombie
8 years ago

My father taught me the basic when I was young, like how to change your oil, how to change a tire, etc. If I got a flat, I could change it myself but I’m not opposed to help. However if I broke down on the side of a road, alone, and at night, I’d be wary of men who would approach to help. I’d probably say something like “Hey thanks but don’t trouble yourself. I can get this. My dad was a mechanic.” I find that I always have to stipulate the last part because if I don’t, they assume I don’t know how to do anything. If he moved on, no problem. If he kept insisting or started to get too close, I’d probably make sure I had a good grip on the tire iron and be scanning for the best escape route.

The unfortunate part is that while most men who would approach have the best intentions, as women we have to go on guard in situations like that.

As for the OP, I call bullshit on the whole thing. The story isn’t credible in the least.

ozymandias42
8 years ago

My dad didn’t teach me or my sister how to change tires. I’m not sure why, because my sister drives.

Cliff Pervocracy
8 years ago

Driver’s Ed really ought to cover basic repair. They could use the time block they currently all use to show pointlessly scaremongering “Death On Wheels!!!” videos from 1973.

Snowy
Snowy
8 years ago

Aww but Cliff, watching those melodramatic PSA videos is one of my fondest memories of drivers ed!

Kendra, the bionic mommy
Kendra, the bionic mommy
8 years ago

The PSA video about train safety worked for me, though. I still have a very healthy respect for the dangers of railroad crossings.

Joven
Joven
8 years ago

Why dont they look, tell me why dont they look.

James
James
8 years ago

Wait, so he was driving home from work and when someone declined his assistance in tire changing, he elected to, rather than continue home, WATCH the person who was trying to change the tire?

What kind of strange person is this?

She Wolf of the Midwest
She Wolf of the Midwest
8 years ago

The men’s rights reddit thread has now appeared on SRS, no one there buys it either:

http://www.reddit.com/r/ShitRedditSays+none/comments/teuad/good_on_ya_put_that_shallow_tramp_back_in_her/

Kyrie
Kyrie
8 years ago

Wait, so he was driving home from work and when someone declined his assistance in tire changing, he elected to, rather than continue home, WATCH the person who was trying to change the tire?

That’s the creepiest part IMO. Although, it’s probably not real. I could well imagine the story going like that:
Guy sees woman (probably conventionally pretty) working on her car, offers help. Woman refuses, saying something like “I don’t need your help”.
Guy hears “I don’t need your help”, gets offended, go away. He changes the sentence so that internet people understand better how mean she was, and who cares about the precises words? Then adds the coffee part, because of course dumb female probably didn’t manage alone! But if he writes that, little sympathy for him. So why not say that it did happens, since it probably did anyway?

She Wolf of the Midwest
She Wolf of the Midwest
8 years ago

Oops! I forgot; it’s from ask reddit, not men’s rights reddit. My bad!

The OP from ask reddit is now on the SRS thread,t explaining why he refers to women as “females”.

James
James
8 years ago
Reply to  Kyrie

I suppose I really meant “What kind of stranger person thinks describing his own behaviour (whether or not he actually did this) thus would be plausible and not totally strange?”

Doesn’t he realize it makes him look like a horror film mouthbreather?

Joanna
8 years ago

“A female what?”

Female giraffe. Duh!

amy
amy
8 years ago

Right- in this day and age she 1) didn’t have AAA, 2) didn’t have a cell phone to call AAA or some other garage or a friend, 3) didn’t go to coffee shop to use the phone there if she was in fact without a cell, 4) actually told someone creepy that they were creepy (because you know how well that would go over) instead of just saying “no thanks, I think I got this”.

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