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Friend-zoning Out

One of approximately ten gazillion zillion “friend zone” rage comics.

I’m too lazy to write a real post today, so I thought I’d point you all to a pretty decent analysis of the dreaded “friend zone” by Foz Meadows on goodreads.

Here she is addressing the “Nice Guys” of the world:

[S]omewhere along the line, you’ve got it into your head that if you’re romantically interested in a girl who sees you only as a friend, her failure to reciprocate your feelings is just that: a failing. That because you’re nice and treat her well, she therefore owes you at least one opportunity to present yourself as a viable sexual candidate, even if she’s already made it clear that this isn’t what she wants. That because she legitimately enjoys a friendship that you find painful (and which you’re under no obligation to continue), she is using you. That if a man wants more than friendship with a woman, then the friendship itself doesn’t even attain the status of a consolation prize, but is instead viewed as hell: a punishment to be endured because, so long as he thinks she owes him that golden opportunity, he is bound to persist in an association that hurts him – not because he cares about the friendship, but because he feels he’s invested too much kindness not to stick around for the (surely inevitable, albeit delayed) payoff.

Seriously, Nice Guys, if you think of your friendship with a woman as a means to an end, or some kind of purgatory, then it’s not really a friendship, and you’re doing both yourself and your crush a disservice by persisting in it.  (I learned this lesson myself the hard way, a long time before there were helpful internet posts explaining to me why Nice Guying was a recipe for crappiness all around.)

Speaking of learning: I also learned from Foz Meadows’ post that there is a Wikipedia entry for “friend zone,” complete with advice on how dudes can avoid getting  “friendzoned” in the first place.

Several advisers urged men, during the initial dates, to touch women physically in appropriate places such as elbows or shoulders as a means of increasing the sexual tension. … Adviser Ali Binazir agrees, and suggested for the man to be a “little bit dangerous”, not in a violent sense, but “with a bit of an edge to them”, and be unpredictable and feel “comfortable in their skin as sexual beings.”

Wikipedia: The Free Encyclopedia … for Your Penis*.

Also: Here is the official Friend Zone anthem, “Consolation Prize” by Orange Juice. Lyrics here.

* Hetero cis penis only.

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Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
12 years ago

kladle — by refudiating feminists? (Though, Classical Latin wise, that’s more a word than what most MRAs seem to make up)

Bostonian
12 years ago

Coconut oil is also good for misandry!

pillowinhell
pillowinhell
12 years ago

Honestly, almond oil is the most misandrist of oils. Not only is it good for recipes, it makes a wonderful massage oil and really brings out the beauty in skin.

Magpie
Magpie
12 years ago

What about the fat in your mum’s dripping tin, remember that? Chips with burnt crunchy black bits (some of which may have been blowflies) 🙂

katz
12 years ago

I happen to be working on a game called “Oil” at this very moment.

Fembot
Fembot
12 years ago

Btw? I think Dave should head over to RooshV. It’s a veritable goldmine of misogyny over there. A recent forum post asked these alphas the type of woman an alpha would wife up. Typical response:
1. Virgin
2. Let’s Him cheat
3. Is faithful
4. Submissive
5. Hot, an 8 at least
6. Cooks and cleans
7. Good mother

LOL!!

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
12 years ago

Magpie, the looks I’ve gotten when I mention that, like it’s just the most disgusting thing ever (certainly does make finding lard easier though!) — and thankfully flies were rarely *in* my parents house, the dog outside being far more interesting to them.

cloudiah
12 years ago

OMG, reddit/mr is using The Simpsons to support the False Rape meme. Make it stop. MAKE IT STOP!!!

Coconut oil, eh? I’ve been seeing it around. What else is it good for, other than baking?

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
12 years ago

2. Let’s Him cheat
3. Is faithful

o.O? That’s not exactly how non-monogamy tends to work in my experience…

cloudiah
12 years ago

My mother had a dripping tin too (well it was a jar, actually). I am so pleased to be among compatriots.

Pecunium
12 years ago

Thermos: Citation(s) needed.

Bostonian
12 years ago

Coconut oil is good for frying, for flavoring, as a hand cream(not kidding), frosting for the lactose intolerant, misandry (kidding) and mouse wheels(lubes the squeaky wheel and does not poison the mice).

Crumbelievable
Crumbelievable
12 years ago

OMG, reddit/mr is using The Simpsons to support the False Rape meme. Make it stop. MAKE IT STOP!!!

I wish–nay, demand–that David makes his next post about this.

katz
12 years ago

Coconut oil makes great lip gloss, too (coconut oil + cocoa butter + beeswax = perfection).

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
12 years ago

Bostonian, that mice wheel tip has me curious if it might be fish safe, probably not being an oil, but squeaky things needing lube I’ve got (I’m sure there’s a misandry joke in there, but my desire to solve everything with WD40 and duct tape is blocking my finding it)

Bostonian
12 years ago

Cloudiah, yes, yes, it is a floor wax and dessert topping!

Love the reference!

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
12 years ago

If you fry with it does it make things taste coconutty?

(Yes, I know that’s not a real word, but it makes more sense than sag-women.)

Bostonian
12 years ago

Unrefined coconut oil will make things taste coconutty, refined will not.

Pecunium
12 years ago

Margarine makes for, “chewy” cookies. Butter makes for crisp ones. Lard is for pastry. Coconut oil is decent for parve. A 50/50 butter and canola is a decent compromise for crispy/flakey, but it takes a food processor, and needs to be added cold.

ABNOY
ABNOY
12 years ago

“Me walking up to random men and telling them they have an amazing package while never taking my eyes off their crotch and describing in graphic detail what exactly I’d like to do with that specific body part.”

This is one of the all-time top 10 sexual fantasies of straight men everywhere. The only way the average red-blooded het guy would get offended if a woman were to do this is if the woman was pug fugly.

cloudiah
12 years ago

Manboobz: come for the mockery, stay for the baking tips.

Viscaria
Viscaria
12 years ago

He appears to have left, but should he return, I refuse to take the shiny new troll out for a walk unless he can do the following:

1) Describe one major aspect of second-wave feminism.

2) Explain a way in which second-wave feminism is distinct from first-wave feminism.

3) Explain a way in which second-wave feminism is distinct from third-wave feminism.

Trolls who blame all of the Terrible Awful Things that may or may not exist on a specific movement, but who are unable to describe what that movement even is, are not worth engaging IMHO.

I love cookies! Yummmmmm.

Bostonian
12 years ago

I have mainly used my coconut oil in cakes and muffins, not cookies.

Pecunium
12 years ago

Coconut oil is, however, not safe for people who have problems with fructose.

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