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a voice for men antifeminism block that metaphor grandiosity I am making a joke MRA paul elam worst writing in the history of the universe

A Voice for Men takes the last gravy train to Clicheville

Over on A Voice for Men, Paul Elam is knocking the clichés out of the park! In a post about … oh, something about feminists being about to get their big comeuppance, who the fuck cares, all his posts are pretty much the same at this point, he explains how the mean feminists’

gravy train is about to derail, and that right quickly. One set of wheels is already off the track. … the choo choo is hittin’ poo poo.

That’s right, the metaphorical feminist gravy train is metaphorically derailing into a metaphorical mountain of metaphorical poop.

After a few more paragraphs of this poopery, Elam offers up a bit of inspiration for his troops:

[T]he times they are a changing. The worm is turning and lies are burning. Their whole house of cards is about to go up in a puff. What you are seeing is just the desperation that comes with them waking up to it.

Believe me, it does my heart good. Just to see their frantic scrambling to point the finger at me and my brothers, while they comically pretend our sisters aren’t standing right next to us, every time one more their lies bites the dust, is an absolute highlight in my day.

Must be time to crank up the action around here.

And then he really kicks it into high gear:

Keep your eye on the ball, boys. Put the pedal to the metal.  Wake up and smell the coffee, feminists, because the shoe is on the other foot now!  We’re burning the candle at both ends  — because when the going gets tough the tough get going. What goes around comes around. Feminists and manginas, you made your bed, now you’re going to have to lie in it. The tide’s beginning to turn, all you gender ideologues and your lackeys at the SPLC, and it looks like there’s a new sheriff in town! Remember, nice guys finish last. And it ain’t over till the fat lady sings!

Ok, that’s not really Elam any more. That’s just a bunch of random clichés borrowed from Steve’s Cliché List, with some references to feminists and manginas and the Southern Poverty Law Center shoved in here and there.

Huh. I think I just figured out how Elam writes his posts.

EDITED TO ADD: For whatever reason, this post is no longer up at AVFM; here’s the Google cache version. Read the comments there too; quite a little shitstorm going on there.

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Medium Dave
12 years ago

And the feminist-fascist octopus has sung its swan song…

pecunium
12 years ago

Whelp… I guess we’re all looking at the last round up, because our spirits are willing, but the flesh is weak, so better to burn out than to rust, as we shuffle off to Buffalo, since it won’t play in Poughkeepsie.

MissPrism
12 years ago

Yeah! Bolted together like the sections of a prefabricated henhouse!

Dracula
Dracula
12 years ago

Their whole house of cards is about to go up in a puff.

So what, he’s talking about setting card houses on fire? Or using them in some sort of disappearing act?

Holly Pervocracy
12 years ago

I seriously thought you’d made up the whole post, David, until I reread and realized the top two parts were real.

Holy shit. I’m as surprised as a tin cat in a tiny forest of electric horse polishers.

MissPrism
12 years ago

I once heard someone on the telly say a plan was “in cold storage on the back burner.”

hellkell
hellkell
12 years ago

Does he huff glue and then maniacially cackle as he types his tripe?

yourbirdcansing88
yourbirdcansing88
12 years ago

“[T]he times they are a changing”

Did he seriously just (ab)use a Bob Dylan quote to support his flimsy “argument” against women? Well, now, two can play at that game. Here’s what I think of Elam and his lack of relevance:

“He’s sure got a lotta gall
To be so useless an’ all.”
–Bob Dylan, “Visions of Johanna”

pecunium
12 years ago

I do have to say though, that Paul Elam’s prognostication have caused me to be as worried as a Manx Cat in a Room Full of Rocking Chairs.

hellkell
hellkell
12 years ago

I’m surpised he didn’t quote Zevon: “Send lawyers, guns, and money, the shit has hit the fan.”

Dracula
Dracula
12 years ago

Clearly feminists are cruisin’ for a bruisin’ on the highway to the danger zone, ’cause they feel the need for speed, and they can’t drive 55.

Sharculese
12 years ago

hey david, your link doesnt go anywhere and they appear to have taken that article off the front page

i know i saw it a couple days ago, but yeah, it doesn’t appear to be there anymore

magdelynswallows
12 years ago

What have you seen my manboobz son,
what have you seen my darling young one

i’ve seen MRA’s tongues a wagging
but no feminists listening
i’ve seen family courts corrupted
but no feminsts caring
i’ve walked 10,000 miles to champion the unexcusable
i’ve leveled so many falsehoods
I must appear delusional

it’s a hard, it’s a hard, it’s a hard, it’s a hard
it’s a haaaarrrdddd rain a gonna fall

indifferentsky
12 years ago

What Sharculese means is, that link is deader than a doornail and the article gone with the wind. I’m sure you’ll get on it like white on rice to facilitate your lazy as molasses feminist base.

pecunium
12 years ago

I see mags admits to lying. i’ve leveled so many falsehoods
I must appear delusional

It’s not the lies that look delusional, it’s the things you think are true.

magdelynswallows
12 years ago

pecunium, your interpretation might work if the song started, “what have you seen my ma99ie son….but, it doesn’t

Shadow
Shadow
12 years ago

I see Mags has been bitten too. Go forth and spread the rhyming bug Mags. Maybe Elam and Price’ll be a little more entertaining in verse

magdelynswallows
12 years ago

thanx shadow,

i just somebody mention dylan and thought i’d contribute.

theLaplaceDemon
theLaplaceDemon
12 years ago

I don’t think a better MRA parody could be written. Thanks, Paul Elam! Always good to have a sense of humor!

pecunium
12 years ago

Ok, it’s not you. But the speaker admits to telling lies.

And the speaker is an MRA, or supporter.

Wisteria
Wisteria
12 years ago

Quoted from OP: “Just to see their frantic scrambling to point the finger at me and my brothers, while they comically pretend our sisters aren’t standing right next to us, every time one more their lies bites the dust, is an absolute highlight in my day.”

Well, obviously they had to remove the post, since there he calls some women “our sisters.” And everyone knows, there are no good women anywhere on the earth.

pecunium
12 years ago

Ah… I see, you are trying to make it a case of someone from manboobz, not someone coming to.

Ok, what are these falsehoods?

What are these things feminists “don’t care about” (as opposed to don’t share your conclusions on)?

What is is we aren’t listening to?

Recall that to listen isn’t to agree (see Ruby, to whom we have listened, even as she has refused to extend the same curtesies).

It’s not that we don’t hear you. It’s that we don’t agree.

It’s not that we don’t see problems, is that the solutions the MRM demands are inequitable; more inequitable than the present wrongs.

So go ahead, pull the other one.

indifferentsky
12 years ago

So the second stanZa of maggies ditty is not the response from the party addressed in the first line?

hahah big debate on mags dylan impression.

Shadow
Shadow
12 years ago

@indifferentsky

It reads to me like the first stanza is addressed to manboobz, and the second stanza is a response from manboobz

Falconer
12 years ago

Take the last train to cliches
And I’ll show up on the front page
I will be there for a few days
Til they yank me off the stage
Don’t flame me, oh no no no!
Oh no no no!

‘Cause I’m trolling in the morning
And I must get on the Boobz
I’ll give them things to talk about
And light fires on the Tubes
Now don’t flame me, oh no no no!
Oh no no no!
And I doubt I’ll be back this way again.

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