Love is in the air! On The Spearhead, WF Price has penned a piece with the intriguing title: “What’s Wrong with Wanting to be Loved?” To that I would answer: nothing.
Let’s see what lovely sorts of things Price has to say about the subject:
[S]till we have people whining about “misogyny.” Young feminists whose most important concern is the ability to have sex entirely free of consequences, and who shamelessly raise their voices for the right to kill their children in the womb. Lesbian gender feminists who wreck families for profit and sex. Male feminists who boast about fathering children and shuffling their responsibilities onto some duped cuckold, and who malign their fellow men for a crack at college girls.
Huh. Not sure how exactly this bit of nastiness is supposed to advance the cause of love.
(Also, I think that last bit – the line about those “who malign their fellow men for a crack at college girls” – is supposed to be a reference to … me, and the talk I gave on Monday at Northwestern, to which he has added his own little fantasies, like he did in his original, highly fictionalized, post on the subject. The man is obsessed.)
In the comments, Spearhead readers offered their own thoughts on the topic of love.
Revver started things off with this lovely thought:
Having seen and heard a great majority of women, being “unloved” becomes lighter and lighter a burden with each passing year.
How easily they make themselves look like fools.
Opus spat forth an opus; here’s an edited version:
Women judge men by pre-selection.
If you have been dumped, then a member of Team Vagina has deemed you unworthy, so as in Snakes and Ladders you start from the bottom again. There is simply no point seeking female solace, because the woman will see that you do not seek her, and thus, offended, accuse you of unsolicited attention, or alternatively act offended that you are not interested in her. (I speak from experience). …
Women as we know are programmed to get over even the worst relationship in no more than three months, whereas for a man (even when in hindsight it was Xmas come early) we are often talking decades, for to be ditched is to take away all that it means to be a man (provider, nurturer). … Now, why am I betting that Futrelle did not mention these things last night – and why am I also betting he has not got one single phone number from any female at Northwestern Univeristy?
(You guys are really are obsessed. Aren’t you supposed to mention my weight as well?)
Greyghost managed to work the phrase “gina tingle” into his ramblings:
Men actually have the capacity to love. Only a man can write an article like that. Women just don’t have the capacity to love. Women gina tingle. …
The big lie was and is that a woman can love. Romance is what men do women receive it. …
The MRM with women on board on not will never ever change the nature of women. No matter how much awareness of the pain men and even children are in, women will vote and demand what is in therir childish perception of their interest. ( It will always be uninhibitted status and hypergamy)
In a later comment, he added these creepy afterthoughts:
Women do not and can not love the way you do and can. The best a man can get is some good emotional gina tingle. Never ever forget it. It can be a very emotionally pleasing and soothing time for a man but a man can never forget he is a man and right or wrong is a keeper of civilization.
The emotional trauma brought down on men when the realization of the lie hits [is] off the charts. It is where murders and suicides come from.
Georice81 offered up a rather elaborate excuse for slut-shaming:
My observation is that when women have been sexually promiscous their ability to submit and be very loyal to a single man is very diminished. … They can’t respect that one man that may actually love them since they are contemptous of a man that could love someone like them. Men in the 1950′s understood this and would not marry someone who was not a virgin since they did not trust those that were not.
We men can love and want to love. We also have a huge capacity to forgive. Modern western woman don’t seem to comprehend this because of their own hangups.
Binxton, for his part, seemed to be posting from an internet café on Gor:
Women are by nature emotional, self-centered creatures. Absent controls on their behavior, they lack both morals and objective principles. They are too easily manipulated by their environment to allow them to be free.
Ultimately, female emotional nature requires men to control women.
Women will love when they endure hardship and respect higher authority, i.e., patriarchy.
Western women must acknowledge a male-centered world where they can enjoy the labors of man only if, and when, they show due deference to male authority. Those who fail to do so must be disciplined and punished as examples.
Joe set forth some similarly, er, traditional notions:
Women are capable of love but there’s a reason St. Paul tells wives to “fear” their husbands. Because women are just much more like children in their moral reasoning and in their emotional “resilience” (or capacity for cruelty). So for a woman to love a husband is much like a child’s love for his parents. It is a love that is requires her to be in a dependent position. This is why marriage in a feminist society of independent and irreligious (I don’t mean women without superstition, but women without fear of moral judgment) women, cannot work.
I think I’ve had enough of The Spearhead’s notions of love. Let’s try ten hours of Haddaway instead:
But don’t you see, Quackers! Obviously it is we women who are always irresponsible and must be prevented from our own worst instincts lest we destroy white male civilization.
/I had a very big sacrasm
I don’t think it’s sad either. My guess is these men started off life with high, if simple expectations, but little ability to deal with the contradictions and complex realities of life. They ended up deeply disappointed and now they want someone to blame.
I guess wondering if these guys could judge emotions in an equal way for men and women was a bit naive of me.
Ha. So it was MR’ers. After someone early-ish said that the feministe post had been linked on reddit I already braced myself for the MR onslaught. Which promptly came. 🙂
@ Quackers re: treating women like children… man, controlling and dominating children is the fastest and easiest way to end up with some fucked up kids. They do better when you treat them like people, same as women. These dudes are just fucking ABUSIVE.
I keep waiting for Jim Carrey’s head to sync back up with the beat, and it just won’t do it.
Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy *sobbing*
I have no sympathy for the “oh, they were just hurt badly in a relationship” crap.
Because if that were indeed the case, I would hate men atomically. Shock of all shocks, I’m able to realize that men are INDIVIDUALS! Capable of coming in all sorts of flavors, including douche and awesome! WHAT A CONCEPT.
(Also, when I broke my rapist’s heart and he declared that because of me, he’d never believe in love again, I DANCED AND SANG. I am obviously such a woman.)
Jesus LBT, that is a world of fucking fucked up fuckness. I am so sorry 🙁
RE: M Dubz
Don’t worry about it. I think of it this way: I got a chance to make my abuser cry. I try to be a good person, but I’ve got enough evil in me to take pleasure and solace in that. Maybe I was unable to press charges, maybe I was never able to do anything concrete to him, but I made him bawl, and I got away, and that’s good enough for me.
And now I have a very nice sweet husband who is awesomeness and beauty incarnate. So I say that the world has treated me quite well!
@LBT: I say, good for you!
He sexually assaulted you; you made him cry and broke his heart. I think the scales are tipped in your favor (although I can’t figure out if it should be the weight of his offense outweighs yours*, or the weight of your pain outweighs his).
*Assuming for the sake of the metaphor that what you did was an offense. I’m inclined to not give him an inch, though, even to the point of denying that breaking hearts is an offense.
RE: Falconer
Meh, he was the sort of narcissist who saw everything as a story where he was the hero. I was the Manic Pixie Dream Girl who was rescuing him from mediocrity, and thus when I dumped him I had to become the Heart-Breaker for narrative convenience.
Honestly, I mostly just hope he didn’t try and go for another underage teenager, using his broken heart as more justification to his narcissistic martyrdom.
Gah. The best thing that guy ever gave me was a great template for a story villain.
Oh, how I hate the idea of the Manic Pixie Dream Girl with the fiery glory of a thousand burning spools of film.
It’s a heavy load to dump on someone, expecting them to be a MPDG for you, and thus denying them the full range of emotion and also demanding that they be constantly on the go.
And then there’s the problems in seeing oneself as the hero of a story and casting everyone else in the other roles.
@LBT
Your experiences and decisions based on those experiences are all a testament to your strength. You were horribly abused but you don’t hate men just because your abuser was arbitrarily male.
Our regular “pundits” on The Spearhead on the other hand…
Jesus tapdancing christ. He must have been horrible to deal with even before the shit he did.
RE: Falconer
I too LOATHE the Manic Pixie Dream Girl. I loathe pretty much any character type set up just as a tool for another (be it Magic Minority, Manic Pixie Dream, Ordained Love Interest, etc.) but since Manic Pixie Dream was what I used to get roped into a lot, I have a personal grudge. Luckily, it was easily solved: I discovered that breed of asshole mostly want a Manic Pixie Cis Femme Girl!
RE: Maya
It helps that I’m a man myself, and going on testosterone proved beyond all doubt that being an asshole is NOT a chemical requirement. Also, even when I was surrounded by assholes, there were still enough decent people of all sorts of genders to reassure me.
RE: Rutee
Oh god, was he ever. I have to give that guy credit; he gave me a very thorough early education in recognizing people like him at the get-go. And he inspired the most successful story villain I’ve ever written by supplying the exact mental framework to amp up to eleven, so there ya go. (Because at least he was pretty pathetic and completely dependent on his parents because he was allergic to responsibility. I can only imagine what someone with more of a spine and power would be able to do with his kind of thinking and behaviors.)
Yes, but Mr. Al shows up towards the end and mansplainy FAILgasms all over the thread… setting the stage for this, which wins the internet, forever.
aaaaaaaand, I commented at the bottom of a page that was apparently right in the middle of this thread.
sorry for the random out-of-context blurt. apparently I am new to all this “internet” stuff.
@PDA Well, I’m just glad that you posted the link to Caperton’s marvelous response. I say this as someone who is prone to random out-of-context blurting myself, which people here have been kind enough not to call me on so far. 🙂
@LBT So sorry you went through that, but glad you managed to get a great story villain out of the experience and also continue to be a decent human being, unlike our little MRA friends.
Keep firing, assholes!
… sorry, Spaceballs jumped to the front of my brain and started dancing about. I think I’m better now.
@PDA,
OH MY GOD YES.
What I really want to know: who would both to post a ten hour youtube clip of the same thing on repeat? At first i though it wasn’t even a whole song – then I looked up the lyrics…
RE: Falconer
“Who’s that?”
“Asshole.”
“I know that! What’s his name?”
“Asshole, sir, Major Asshole.”
“Who hired him?”
“I did, sir! He’s my cousin!”
“Who the hell is that?”
“He’s another Asshole, sir, General Asshole.”
“How many assholes we got on this ship?”
“SIR!” *all hands go up*
“I knew it! I’m surrounded by Assholes!”
(PS you’re forgiven)
MRAL Learned Nothing!
Last Sauronic comment at feministe
Unless….could he be attempting irony?
*pauses to think a moment*
Naaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
And he tried to tell commenters from manboobz that he wasn’t trolling, just engaging.
MRAL really needs to get some help for his little trolling problem. For his own sake if nothing else – if he keeps it up for much longer he’s going to run out of blogs. How many has he been banned from so far?
Also, I would like to buy Caperton a drink.