Oh, boy. So that almost certainly imaginary “dude punching his spermjacking girlfriend” story in the Men’s Rights subreddit the other day? The one that inspired all those Men’s Rights Redditors to totally defend the (alleged) puncher?
Well, now Jezebel has weighed in on the subject as well. Erin Gloria Ryan raises a few questions about ineedhelpnow1234’s implausible tale, and about the dudes who not only believed it but got all enraged at the imaginary punched girlfriend:
Where does this legend of the sperm swiping madwoman come from? And why won’t it die? Why are men’s rights activists so willing to believe that in a world practically dripping with sperm, women specifically want theirs so they can be pregnant and possibly farty for 9 months, stretch their skin out, and go through childbirth in order to control the men in their lives?
Apparently, at least one Men’s Rights Redditor is a reader of Jezebel, because he went and posted a link, explaining that
I normally try to stay neutral as best I can in matters relating to the men’s rights/feminism debate, but this has me grinding my teeth.
So this is what feminists think about one of our most pressing issues.
Presumably he is referring to the extremely pressing issue of girlfriends who flee the bedroom after sex, clutching used condoms and shouting that “I’m finally going to get the baby I deserve,” and how they totally deserve to be punched in the stomach so hard it leaves a bruise.
The discussion inspired this exchange:
Oh, and this one, too:
YadaYadaYada2 certainly has a flair for the dramatic, doesn’t he?
Men’s Rights Activists, so emotional!
EDITED TO ADD: I sort of started arguing with the regulars in the comments there, and Glarfugus set me straight on the nature of my sins against the Men’s Rights subreddit:
You quoted accurately, the problem lies where you quote perfectly sound posts and talk about them like they’re ridiculous. You address punching a woman in the stomach as though it’s something of high crime. I’m not saying it’s something that’s right, but punching someone in the stomach in a panicked situation where you have a risk of being fucked by the court system for the next 18 years? Reasonable action.
I put my favorite part in bold. The stuff about punching women is pretty special too.
…would you accept $200/month to learn what it feels like to heal a vaginal tear?
I suppose I could have really blew AntZ’s mind if I had mentioned that the sound-based stuff could be possible if you had a different medium (like a fluid) with particles closer together… But I honestly thought he was just throwing words around. Dropped the ball on that one. *shrug*
Ah well.
also a lie
@David:
That. Is. Brilliant. It’s like a version of Poe’s law, where when someone outlines an outlandish and sarcastic situation, somebody will look at it and say “Well, yeah! That’s exactly right! What’s your point?”
All I know is that once Antsykins perfects the artificial womb/male uterus, I’m finally going to get the baby I deserve (and it (he) will free Earth and cleanse the capital wasteland).
Did Antz really say he took a shit (“did a dooky”) while riding a bicycle or did I imagine that? Because if true, that would be impressive.
Being a long time participant in r/mensrights, you cannot blame the reddit for extremists that visit it.
FYI uterus havers, all births are perfectly safe, go perfectly swimmingly, and can be done totally safely without any doctors or major complications.
Also, it’s only a grapefruit so quit your whining.
@magdelyn:
I don’t think David is a long time participant in r/mensrights, so he’s fine.
*trollface*
@Holly
She had no episiotomy, and was not lucky at all.
@Futrelle
We both know that the April fool’s theft was a hoax. However ..
As a thought experiment, what legal recourse did that young man have at the moment that his (fake) GF was running off with his (make believe) genetic material in order to impose a (nonexistent) 18 year sentence of indentured servitude?
You say a tummy punch is the WRONG thing to do. Fine. What is the RIGHT thing to do?
I don’t agree with violence, and I think anyone who condones the tummy punch is misguided (if anyone really believed the April fool’s joke, which I doubt). However, the (fake) story has made me think. What should a young man do (if such a thing really happened)?
What do YOU think? And what about your flock? What do THEY think?
@Kirby
David’s been there as long as I have. He pretty much reads it every day. He used to post there, but I think he got banned. I think he’s been unbanned though.
I guess Antz thinks home births are something that’s never done nowadays?
(There’s probably more stuff involved in an *actual* home birth than Antz has listed, but dude. There’s been an entire *movement* against epidurals.)
@AntZ:
In an imaginary world, you can make anything seem appropriate.
if anyone really believed the April fool’s joke, which I doubt
Try nearly everyone quoted in David’s original post on the matter.
P.S. Slease don’t refer to punching someone in the gut in cutsy terms like a “tummy punch.”
Frankly, I’m wondering about the viability of sperm gotten in this way to begin with. What little I know about artificial instemination would makes it out to be MUCH more difficult.
I found AntZ his real name is Chris, and this is him on Judge Judy.
The JIG is UP
I love the constant use of “enslavement” and “indentured servitude” to describe child support. I have a feeling there’s a lot of slaves and indentured servants throughout history who would find “pay this relatively small amount, unless you can’t afford to do so” to be a pretty sweet deal compared to their own circumstances.
@AntZ:
Also, you could try this guy, who was responding to this post.
@Mags:
Your movement must really be in trouble if you have to inflate the numbers by claiming David as a participant. 😐
Yeah, 300 a month is notable, but it is by no means indentured servitude, much less slavery. Even if you contend you had no say in the matter, it’s still not as bad.
But AntZ, I have a solution that’s good for kids. And it makes women pay too. Can you dig it? IT’s tax everyone to give money to all active parents. No unfairness, just smack everyone to make sure kids can eat, get clothed decently, etc. we all have a vested interest in kids doing that (I fucking hate kids and I can admit that much)
I love how there’s just the assumption that this lady just desperately wanted a baby and OF COURSE would go for child support. Guess folks who’ve gotten accidentally pregnant but broke up with the father and didn’t tell him (possibly because they rightly assumed they were assholes who viewed fatherhood as “servitude”) just don’t exist or some shit.
I had my kids drug free* and yeah, Zarat is still the physical manifestation of an MRA 8 ball toy. There’s only a set number of phrase combinations he can go through before he starts to repeat.
*Not preaching! Everyone should birth – or not birth – however you decide. It seriously doesn’t matter what you choose, only that you get to choose and you’re happy. I was only covering the “you wussies just can’t understand my awesome!” Zarat currently has sloshed to the viewing window.
$300 a month is chump change.
@Mags:
… You DO realize that we’re talking about how much men are expected to pay for child support, right? Just checking.
this sounds exceptionally awesome
Maggie, the hero of men’s rights, dismissing the poor (Which, while is majority women, still includes a lot of men).
Mags: Being a long time participant in r/mensrights, you cannot blame the reddit for extremists that visit it.
It’s amazing that all the douchebags are exceptions. There are so many exceptions it begins to look like a pattern.
But the reverse, an extremist who is also a feminist… totes representative of all feminists.
One might think there was some sort of double standard; that you, and yours, were stacking the deck and palming cards.