In the war of ideas, it is important to be well-armed. And that’s why one brave antifeminist warrior named Roy Scott Movrich has supplied his fellow warriors with some potent verbal ammunition, a full clip of misogynist insults designed to reduce all women in the immediate area to blubbering tears.
As Roy explains:
Feminists have gotten away with shaming language for too long. Far too long.
Its time we got our own back.
And since women in general have not stood up to defend men, it stands that all women are tarred with the same brush. Therefore ALL women are to be denigrated equally.
Fair’s fair.
Here are a choice sampling of insults to deride women with.
Try them and see. I did. And watch their ordure (translation: s**t) hit the roof!
A few of Roy’s insults are borrowed from literature (mostly from Shakespeare), but most of them are originals. In a manner of speaking.
He starts out with a puzzler:
Your’s is even smaller than mine.
Presumably he is suggesting that cis women/feminists have some sort of symbolic penis, and that this symbolic penis of theirs is smaller than his non-symbolic penis
He continues on with several other comments in this vein:
It’ll be way bigger than anything you’ll ever have.
The one you try to have is even smaller than mine.
And of course this classic:
Mine isn’t too small, your cooch is too wide/large/loose.
Then we get some vibrator-shaming:
Oooh! Bad mood! Did you run out of batteries?
And some wildly unoriginal negs:
You sound really old.
You don’t look your age. [Pause] You look [longer pause] old.
You look good enough to be my great-great grandmother.
This one might not be terribly successful with total strangers:
You were/are a lousy lover.
And then it’s back to the vagina:
You must be having constant periods.
It must be cotton pony rodeo time huh?
Note to self: Find out if anyone in the history of the world has ever referred to a woman’s period as “cotton pony rodeo time.”
Then on to cats, spinster-shaming, and general unpleasantness:
Did one of your cats just die?
You must not be married yet.
Can’t have kids huh?
There’s nothing a woman can do for me that my right hand can’t do better.
Even dung beetles are higher than women and feminists.
And back to the vagina again:
You obviously have one of those super large and deep ginas a man has to strap a plank to his back to prevent him falling into.
Note to self: Find out if there is anyone who refers to vaginas as “ginas” who is not a misogynist asscrack.
If you need more, Roy suggests that you can basically go with
[a]nything that implies her plumbing isn’t clean, has diseases or a foul smell.
After delivering this list (and some Shakespeare quotes), Roy somewhat confusingly concludes that insulting women is actually a waste of time:
[A]t the end of the day, given that women are devoid of logic and wit, using such choice insults is wanton waste.
Better to ignore them completely.
And since modern women, with their over-inflated sense of entitlement cannot abide being ignored, this is just as dramatic and effective as any insult.
In other words, the chance that Roy has ever used any of these insults in a conversation with a woman is roughly zero.
@ KathleenB, thanks. I’m glad you had a supportive doctor and you are well.
Those insults aren’t even remotely clever. However, I must say that this little comment really got me: “And since women in general have not stood up to defend men, it stands that all women are tarred with the same brush.” Is that so? Women defend men ALL THE DAMN TIME, even at the expense of other women. Besides, “men in general” do not defend women against misogyny, so by his logic I should tar all men with the same brush. Roy exemplifies why the “men’s rights movement” is really just an anti-woman hate movement.
I can see the MRAs going crazy over this new episode of South Park. It seems to be all about how this poor boy is forced by his evil mother to put the toilet seat down.
Sorry, but I can’t leave this out:
“[A]t the end of the day, given that women are devoid of logic and wit, using such choice insults is wanton waste.”
You think that all women deserve to be denigrated for “not defending men” (from what?!) and that “Your’s is even smaller than mine” is a smart insult, yet we women are “devoid of logic and wit”? Riiiight. By the way, “yours” is spelled without an apostrophe. Shouldn’t your superior male brain know that?
“Better to ignore them completely.”
Thank you. We would appreciate that very much.
He acts like women actually care what he thinks of their vaginas.
Also, the funniest word I ever heard for vagina is snooch. Love it.
I think I’ve told the “shallow pussy” story before. Back when I was 18ish, some guy online decided to insult me by telling me my pussy was shallow, and then persisted (this was a public chat room or something like that) in saying it even though I kept telling him it wasn’t really an insult.
I don’t think men understand that women aren’t really so hung up on our vaginas.
Now boobs … I’ve definitely seen women use the boob-shaming against other women. I know, it’s weird when a woman over 12 does it, but yeah, some of them do. And a lot of women see boobs as tied to their femininity. (My mom always says she refuses to exercise because she thinks she’ll just lose her boobs.)
But can you imagine trying to insult a guy with, “MY BOOBS ARE BIGGER THAN YOURS!!”
Actually, that might be a good retort to having them say they have a bigger cock.
Well, MarkyMark thinks that Roy Scott Movrich is a 21st-century S.J. Perelman.
He’s invited his followers to post similar insults, and one has obliged with “a noisy, walking incubator” – adding, a tad optimistically, “that should piss them off”.
I’ll admit, calling me a “a noisy, walking incubator” probably would piss me off. Is that the whole goal, though? Just… irritating people? Or are they hoping they can make women feel bad enough about themselves that they self-evaluate and think “wow, I really am a noisy, selfish incubator! I’m going to stop trying to live my own life the way I choose and will just do what men tell me from this day forward!” I don’t think that’s going to happen. I think most women would think to themselves, “oh look, a misogynistic asshat!” and then leave.
And if the goal is furthering men’s rights, well… I’m not really seeing the connection, fellas. Explain to me in little words; you know, because I’m a girl.
Ah. Moderated because, when I logged in, WordPress gave me my big long name instead of my preferred one, which I didn’t realize until now. Logged in because WordPress said I had to to post from this email address. Anybody else run into that today?
Lucky bastard, you won’t believe all the wining and dining I have to do before I can masturbate without being threatened with false rape charges! Dirty feminist right hand, I need to find me a FOREIGN RIGHT HAND!!
@Falconer
How is it?! I’m picking it up as soon as I submit my paper today, I is mad excited!
Also, on a just as happy note, Community’s back tonight!!!! WHOOT!!!
*exits, skipping to his lou*
@CassandraSays: Yeah, I was pretty excited. Now I’m scared that the rest of the game won’t live up to it. I do know that in BioWare’s Dragon Age you can achieve a full-on gay relationship for your character, male or female. I don’t know about poly or genderqueer or anything (although I don’t know that there’s anything stopping you from deciding your Dragon Age character or your Shepard is whatever xie is).
I was also pretty happy that Mass Effect 2 didn’t force me into a sex scene, so there’s something for the aces, too (although my Shepard did mope over the woman the first game decided I had romanced instead, but asexual +=? aromantic).
Anyway, back to the OP:
@Wetherby: One of the clunkiest lines from old-school Star Trek is when, in “Where No Man Has Gone Before,” Gary Mitchell gets shot down by Elizabeth Dehner. He refers to her as a “walking refrigeration unit.”
I don’t imagine many women these days would be insulted that someone got irritated or mad that they declined a date. Frightened, maybe, depending on the man’s reaction to rejection, but not insulted.
I think women would be more insulted by people expecting them to behave like the women on old-school Star Trek (as much as I love it). I remember the episode in which the woman in thigh boots steals Spock’s brain, in particular, was pretty egregious and looks like an MRA’s wet dream. The Enterprise finds this society which has been segregated by gender for no readily apparent reason and the women live in a high-tech underground bunker and capture men and control them with pain and pleasure stimuli. Granted, no one in the society is educated so’s it sticks, but the episode would seem to fit the MRA idea of what life is like here on earth.
Or there’s the time when the Enterprise encounters a Romulan task force commanded by (gasp!) a woman … who is in complete and competent control of her task group, yet cannot be both a soldier and a woman at the same time. Meanwhile, Kirk and Spock get to be both soldiers and men at the same time.
By contrast, what these guys are doing is awful weaksauce.
Sorry for the wall of text. I had a blog around here somewhere….
@Shadow: I’m only a couple hours in but I’m liking it. Shepard’s a lot more mobile than I remember hir being. Or maybe I wasn’t dashing from cover to cover in the first two games. I liked it a lot better after the conversation I mentioned above.
The only thing that’s irritated me so far is that the game wouldn’t read the code correctly from ME2 and I had to reconstruct my Shepard’s face. I was fiddling around with it but as soon as I put the beard on it just clicked. I think perhaps a few details might be off, such as the width of the mouth and the size of the lips and ears, but eh. It’s close enough that I recognize it. Got a real neurotransmitter dose when I did, too (that was odd).
I need to get into Community. That and 30 Rock and Parks & Rec and Big Bang Theory.
Thank god Netflix is cheaper than cable.
“Cottom pony rodeo” may have surpassed “communists in the funhouse” as my favourite surreal euphenism for menstruation.”
I am agreed. I can’t believe I never heard that one before. It’s love, until I find a new stupid term for periods, because you know how fickle I am, being a woman and all.
RE: Falconer
I’ve actually wanted to end my ten-year gaming hiatus due to Dragon Age: Origins. (A golem! Who IDs as off the gender binary! GIVE IT TO ME JESUS.) I’ve heard Mass Effect is also good. Unfortunately, my newest computer is from the end of 2005, so it’d probably be a massive clunker.
All this talk is making me want to try gaming again!
@LBT: I’m playing all these games on an Xbox.
I would generally endorse anything by BioWare for social justice. They are good people.
Dragon Age: Origins had the aforementioned non-heteronormative romance options. People whined about it on the Internet, claiming BioWare had neglected its “main demographic” because straight men play Dragon Age and Mass Effect and Knights of the Old Republic and everyone else plays The Sims.
This is what a BioWare representative had to say in response. It’s too long to quote in full and I can’t decide what to excerpt, so I’ll just paraphrase it quickly as “You exaggerate the importance of the Straight Male Gamer in our fan base, and we have the numbers to show that you’re not anywhere near as prevalent as you think you are. Our non-Straight White Male gamers deserve just as many game options as you do. We’re going to keep giving them those options and if you argue you’re just going to lower our opinion of you.”
So yeah, BioWare knows where it’s at.
It sounds like you don’t regret wanting to play these games, but I don’t know why you’ve taken a 10-year hiatus, so I just want to let you know I’m sorry if I’m causing you temptations you do not wish to have. The only expression I can think of right now for this sort of thing comes out of a certain strain of evangelical Christianity — I’m sorry if I’m a stumbling block for you*. I don’t think I am, and I think you’d say if I were, but I don’t want to blithely overlook some social pressure or something that’s making you not say so.
(Perhaps I overthink these social interactions.)
* And the implications and things packed up in that expression would take many thousands more words to discuss so I think I’ll stop now.
Oh, as far as Mass Effect goes, I understand there was an option in ME1 for gay romance in the development, but for some reason it got cut, leaving straight and lesbian options in.
So I’ve been talking BioWare up and now I feel like I have to walk it back some: They’ve gotten better. But they’ve gotten lots better very quickly. The first game was only released in November, 2007. Dragon Age was 2009.
So in general, and owning my privilege as a straight white male, I’m very happy with BioWare at the moment and I think there’s a new, diverse era dawning in vidja games.
RE: Falconer
Oh, nothing sinister about my gaming stoppage. It’s actually trivial and silly: the game genres I enjoyed most were platformers (on console) and adventure games (on comp), and one of those genres pretty much bit the dust a bit over a decade ago. Platformers are still around, but the PS2 (my then-new console) ones I tried turned me off, and then I just kinda fell out of it. I never want to hawk up the cash for a new console or new games, and I have no Internet at home, so I just kinda gradually phased out. (Still hoarding my copy of Grim Fandango to try out for a special occasion, though.)
Yeah, I read that BioWare article around when it first came out, and it made me damn happy. (I actually ended up using a fanboy catfight over Shale’s gender to spur a scene in a book I was writing at the time.) I really am getting seriously tempted, even though I don’t know I have the tech to support the game. (REALLY not interested in shelling out for a new comp at the moment, but I seem to recall my current one makes the specs, though barely.)
How is the game play for DAO? Does it reward exploring and thoroughness? Also, can I AVOID all romance options, if I want? How gory is the combat? (I got kids around who’re really sensitive to it.) How big a part does combat play?
LBT, I don’t know your specs, but unless you’ve got a high-end computer from 2005 I doubt you’ve got the wherewithal to play DA or Mass Effect. That’s a bummer.
I don’t know much about the romances in DA. I put the game down because when it comes to games I have the attention span of a golden retriever on spee — SQUIRREL!!
I hope one can avoid romances in DA, but I haven’t got that far.
I think both DA and ME reward exploration. There’s always extra bits to go poke. Mass Effect 1 has dozens of planets that Shepard can run around on in a little APC called the Mako. Sadly, they took it out of the vanilla game in ME2 and made its replacement, the Hammerhead, DLC. I have moral objections to DLC so I was stuck with scanning planets for resources from orbit. I don’t know what effect the Hammerhead has on the game, but even without it sometimes there’s something to explore on a planet’s surface.
As far as violence goes, unfortunately it’s a large part of both franchises. The violence in ME is pretty gore-free although people do react to being shot and sometimes they scream briefly. And then there’s somewhat silly things like freezing into an ice statue and shattering, or burning to ash in a few seconds. I would not recommend ME for a household with small children because everyone cusses a lot, except Shepard allows hirself a “damn” now and again.
On the other hand, Dragon Age is a bloodfest. After a fight your characters are covered in it. There are no internal organs, though, just lots and lots of blood spatter.
If I had to pick BioWare’s one flaw, it’s that they’ve only got one plot — invasion from beyond — and it’s a fightin’ plot. Their demographic is apparently a very diverse group of bloodthirsty savages 😛
As one of those bloodthirsty savages, I’d say the one thing Bioware actually does suck at is morality. Their understanding of it is so comically inept as to be laughable. One of my friends playing The Old Republic mentioned a hilariously bad plotline that involved a hippy trying to prevent you from using a special microbe that’d clean up a ton of pollutiont hat was killing people. The hippy refuses to let you through. You can kill the hippy, save hundreds, possibly thousands of people by fixing the pollution… and get dark side points for it. You can leave her alive, and not dump the microbe, and doom thousands. For light side points. And that’s basically bioware morality in a nutshell 😀
Whoop look what I just found on Tumblr.
It’s a chart summarizing the findings of a paper. The cite is White & Kowalsky (1994), Psychology of Women Quarterly.
It says that when a woman shoots her husband, the principal motive is most often self defense and she gets a 15-20 year prison sentence.
When a man shoots his wife, the principal motive is sexual jealousy and he gets a 2-6 year prison sentence.
Not to ruin anyone’s day or anything. As usual, these are the results of a study. Your Mileage May Vary.
RE: Falconer
Ach, bummer. I’ve been hemorraghing money the past couple months, and am in no way eager to get a computer that can handle a new game. : Also, the violence sounds like it’d make it a no-no. (The kid in question is actually a teenager, just… very, very sensitive to violence. I swear like a sailor though and that doesn’t bother zer at all.)
RE: Rutee
Yeeeeaaaah, that kind of morality makes me feel a bit. Er. Dubious.
RE: Falconer again
Wow, that means “Y: The Last Man” actually UNDERSTATED. When your post-apocalyptic comic book understates those stats, that’s impressive.
@Rutee: Oh, I’m one of those savages, too. When I’m doing tabletop RPGs I tend to like combat-heavy sessions better than combat-light ones. Although I do wish Mass Effect would have included more talk-’em-down options. When BioWare was trolling through the entirety of post-1960 sci-fi for Things To Do, why couldn’t it have paid more attention to the talkier episodes of TNG?
Is The Old Republic that new MMO? ‘Cause I’ve played KOTOR and I don’t remember the bit with the misguided hippy being in there. That “dilemma” does not sit well with me, either, but for crying out loud, is there no way to get past the hippy without employing lethal force? How hard would that have been to program?
@LBT: I haven’t gotten around to reading Y yet, but I take it you posted in response to the study I found. Oh boy.
How does one embed images ’round these parts? Do I use the img tags?
RE: Falconer
I started reading it after long dubiousness. I’ve read the first two trades, and thus far it’s pretty good… though the trans bullcrap in the first volume, I could’ve really done without. (Calling guys like me ‘her’ and ‘tranny’ and insisting we’re not real men? Not the kind of representation I’m psyched about, thanks.) I seriously think most of the trolls we get think all feminists are like the wingnuts “Daughters of the Amazon” cult in that comic, though.
Oh lord, I have no idea how the images work.
–Rogan
Oop. Caught in moderation. Lemme try that again…
RE: Falconer
I started reading Y after long dubiousness. I’ve read the first two trades, and thus far it’s pretty good… though the was trans people are treated in the first volume, I could’ve really done without. (Calling guys like me ‘her’ and insisting we’re not real men? Not the kind of representation I’m psyched about, thanks.) I seriously think most of the trolls we get think all feminists are like the “Daughters of the Amazon” cult in that comic, though.
Oh lord, I have no idea how the images work.
–Rogan