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The hard life of the Alpha male. Get it? Get it? It's a double entendre. Heh heh. Penis.

Now in pill form.

Life is tough for the beta male. During his twenties, as Manosphere dudes never tire of reminding us, women reject him, choosing instead to throw themselves wantonly at caddish alpha males.

Only after these cruel, callous women have squandered their youth and beauty – by the age of 30 if not earlier – do they turn at last to the betas, who’ve been patiently waiting in the “friend zone” the whole time. Those poor betas, nice guys and good providers all, are then lured into marriage with these now-ugly shrews, who are no longer interested in sex, and want only their money, often used to provide for kids sired by alpha males. (See here for Holly Pervocracy’s more detailed analysis of the “Greek system.”)

But life can be tough for the alpha male as well, driven to exhaustion by nearly constant sex with an incredible array of horny twentysomething women. The movie trailer below will give you some idea of just what the typical alpha male has to deal with on a daily basis.

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Xeginy
12 years ago

@Brandon:

I think it’s important to remember that feminism is not a monolithic movement. There are several different “branches” of feminism, mostly because there are just a lot of different people in the world with different needs and desires, but also because feminism recognizes the subjectivity of truth. (Different people have different realities, and face different forms of oppression.)

So what you call feminism I might call bullshit, because I don’t know what definition you’re operating under.

There is also the very real possibility that @CassandraSays is right, and you’re just a whiny asshole. Me taking the time to answer your comments seriously is just feeding into your weird complex and your need to over-analyze and over-complicate interactions between men and women. Also, it seems like you get a lot of your anecdotes from sitcoms.

Bostonian
12 years ago

You know, if Brandon were living in a sitcom, that would explain a great deal.

Shadow
Shadow
12 years ago

Maybe he’s in a pilot that got cancelled, and just hasn’t been informed.

Re: gaslighting. I thought gaslighting was all about making someone doubt the validity of their memory. How the fuck do you gaslight someone 20 mins after meeting them? I mean, I can see how you can attempt to do it, but how many people are gonna trust you over themselves 20 mins after meeting you?

thebewilderness
thebewilderness
12 years ago

I’m so shocked that feminists are not willing to do things for men that disadvantage women. Shocked.

Kendra, the bionic mommy
Kendra, the bionic mommy
12 years ago

I don’t go up and ask borrow money from men. It’s much easier for me to sit in the street and cry until men throw money at me. It’s one of the many life skills I have learned from the Big book o’ learnin.

Kendra, the bionic mommy
Kendra, the bionic mommy
12 years ago

*ask to borrow money

katz
12 years ago

Cassandra, I hope your surgery goes swimmingly. You probably don’t need to worry. Both times I had extractions it was super easy.

I suggest getting a sippy cup so you can drink without opening your mouth 🙂

darksidecat
darksidecat
12 years ago

I also tend to disagree with feminists that men and women are equal but we serve different biological functions.

Nothing like contradicting yourself totally within a single sentence to show how “clever” you are.

Pecunium
12 years ago

Brandon: How does one treat a woman not like a person? One treats them as Targets. Fucktoys. Automatons who are only interested in money.

Sort of the way you describe women, a lot of the time.

Then again you are failing at comprehension. And they say feminists can’t be misogynists. How does it feel that you just called another woman a fuckdoll? You fucking hypocrite! wasn’t hellkell calling Ashley a fuckdoll, but saying that, for all we can see, you treat her like one.

And just to be clear, I am saying you’re a bitch because men treat you like a “fuckdoll with a pulse” and you don’t like that

citation needed. You have no idea how men treat hellkell. We have no idea how you treat Ashley. What we do have is a lot of words from you about how you treat people… some of those words, recently, imply you think being a lousy lay is ok.

Pecunium
12 years ago

pillowinhell: Brandon also seems to think that anyone here is so interested in him that his attempt at stereotypical insults is going to be more hurtful than it is revelatory.

Lauralot
Lauralot
12 years ago

So in December I purchased tickets for a myself and a group of friends for a comic convention in April, as well as a hotel room. Some of those friends were men. Two of them have not yet paid me back in full as due to their financial situations, they can only give me a limited portion of each paycheck. In conclusion, all men are money-whoring jerks.

Hey, remember that time when Brandon thought feminism had a lot of useful ideas that he’d adopted into his own life except then we said he couldn’t be King Feminist?

ithiliana
12 years ago

MRA’s take a little skepticism about women (such as fear of cuckolding) and blow it up into a full blown complex.…….says the man who evolved a full fledged plan of taping, encyrpting, etc. his sex encounters to avoid a false rape accusation even though he claimed not to own a camera, but, you know JUST TALKING.

AHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

M Dubz
M Dubz
12 years ago

@Brandon- A movement that campaigns for real economic and social change, rewriting laws so that women could own property after marriage, women VOTING, women in the workforce, birth control, etc. believes that “men are actors and women are acted upon” exactly HOW now?

@CassandraSays- word of advice on mashed potatoes. If you make them with sour cream and cream cheese, they will be tasty as leftovers. If you make them with just milk, they will not be nearly as tasty the next day. The more you knooooow!

Hippodameia
Hippodameia
12 years ago

M Dubz, that sounds absolutely heavenly.

M Dubz
M Dubz
12 years ago

😀
Future Jewish mommies of the world, making your lives better through fattening foods!

Pecunium
12 years ago

Cassandra: re Mashed Potatoes: There are two ways to make them… mashed, and riced. Riced is pretty much pure potatoes, and needs a ricer.

Mashed is best done with one of the wiggly-wire sort of things. with mashed you can add things like milk, cream, butter, gravy, schmaltz, marrow, etc.

Lauralot
Lauralot
12 years ago

I’ve never been able to enjoy mashed potatoes. The texture and the bland flavor of potatoes put me off, be it instant or homemade. And no amount of butter or additives seem to offset the blandness for me (I don’t like baked potatoes, either, the only potato dishes I really enjoy are fries, tots, chips, or sweet potatoes of any variety). I’m the only one in my family who doesn’t love them.

Bostonian
12 years ago

I am sorry to hear that Lauralot. My favorite way to make mashed potatoes, and the only way my kids will eat them is to cook them in chicken broth with celery, carrots, onions and garlic. Then mash them with a potato masher, add sea salt and pepper to taste, along with butter to taste.
Although that is more of a root veg mash than anything else.

Lauralot
Lauralot
12 years ago

I do enjoy mashed sweet potatoes, I suppose.

katz
12 years ago

If you throw enough garlic and Parmesan into mashed potatoes, or anything really, I don’t see how they can fail to be tasty.

Lauralot
Lauralot
12 years ago

I don’t think I’ve ever had mashed potatoes with Parmesan, come to think of it.

Pecunium
12 years ago

There are some splendid dishes (such as lob/lap scouses) which are based on mased potatoes.

Dracula
Dracula
12 years ago

Come to think of it, I’ve never had mashed potatoes with Parmesan either. It sounds tasty. I bet it’d be good with kale.

M Dubz
M Dubz
12 years ago

@Precunium- mmmmmmm schmaltz….

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
12 years ago

“It is about reciprocity. I tell a story, you tell one to me. I touch your arm, you touch my arm. I try and kiss you, you kiss me, etc…”

And if she doesn’t kiss you back, then presumably this shows that she’s a bitch who was taking advantage of you, rather than a woman who wanted to be your friend but wasn’t sexually interested in you.

In Brandon’s world, there is no way for women to be considered decent people unless they do whatever he wants.

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