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actual activism MRA MRA paradox

Men's Rights in the real world: "No one showed up to the event but organizers say the lack of attendance is not due to a lack of interest."

Come early to get a good seat!

Sometimes it’s worth reminding ourselves that despite all the noise they make online, the Men’s Rights movement has basically no presence in the real world. The picture above is an actual photo of a men’s rights symposium at Montana State University. Here’s how the local NBC affiliate described what went down – or, more accurately, what didn’t go down:

The MSU chapter of the National Coalition for Men organized a symposium to raise awareness of problems in men’s lives.

The group geared the event towards fraternity students at the college and invited speakers to talk about things like men’s rights when it comes to sexual misconduct investigations on-campus.

No one showed up to the event but organizers say the lack of attendance is not due to a lack of interest.

You just keep telling yourself that.

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Holly Pervocracy
9 years ago

Remember when we had those Manboobz meetups? And they weren’t about anything really severely affecting our lives, and there wasn’t a “national coalition” backing them, nor a university hosting them?

And we got a better turnout than that?

Good times, man, good times.

jumbofish
9 years ago

HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

katz
9 years ago

But a lot of men are doing this, right, Brandon?

Holly Pervocracy
9 years ago

“One of the fraternity boys, I was working out at the gym, and he walked up to me, ‘Hey, hey, you’re the guy that did the presentation on the men’s group, right?’ He didn’t want anyone to hear that he was talking about this in public. He was very interested in it, but didn’t want anyone to know that he was interested in men’s rights, men’s issues. So, that kind of shows why no one turned out,” says President of the MSU chapter of the National Coalition for Men Chris Thompson.

The lurkers support him in email!

JenniferP
JenniferP
9 years ago

Well, to be fair, it could have also been “total disagreement and horror.” It’s not JUST lack of interest, David!

Joanna
9 years ago

Is it maybe perhaps because a lot of men don’t feel like the oppressed gender?

Kelly
Kelly
9 years ago

The poor menz were too afraid to go because of shaming tactics. Though I wonder how many actually wanted to attend but don’t wanted to be outed for the misogynists they are.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
9 years ago

I wonder how many would have liked to attend, but didn’t want to go through the trouble and figured that there would be hundreds upon hundreds of folks that would show up anyway…

Holly Pervocracy
9 years ago

I wonder if there were some peopled who would have gone, then Googled “men’s rights” and quickly went “oh hooooly shit I don’t want any part of this.”

I think a lot of online MRAs are oblivious to how they sound not just to feminists, but to garden-variety misogynists. To guys who think female videogame characters should be boobie-display devices, but don’t think rape should be decriminalized. Guys who think women are silly and obnoxious, but don’t think women are evil monsters. Guys who think men and women can’t be friends, but don’t think women should be replaced with sexbots.

The online MRM is so far over the edge they’ve successfully alienated the vast majority of other misogynists.

hellkell
hellkell
9 years ago

HA! Big turnout, guys. Event planning and follow through is not your forte, perhaps you should stick to ranting on the internet.

J. Michael Mount
9 years ago

When I read this I just wanted to give these guys a great big hug.

I got over it quickly.

Magnesium
Magnesium
9 years ago

Lol, the comments for this article are golden.

“Iozzi
I think it’s high time men take a stand. But, at the same time I attempted to join a MRO but was rebuffed because I’m a stay at home mother who watches soaps and eats Bon bons sittin on her ass all day…, it was EXACTLY like feminism only the complete opposite. Sometimes, I think people just want to hate. They hide behind a cause, but the real goal is simply hate. I’ve got a 9 year old boy,…I can only hope his life isn’t ruined by the gov’t, femenists, and his biggest enemy…other men!”

Shadow
Shadow
9 years ago

Who wants to bet that they’re there for free cookies? And who wants to bet that the woman sitting there will break records for the 100m dash when the speaker informs them of what’s on the agenda for the meeting?

vacuumslayer
9 years ago

This is hilarious. Thanks for the Sunday smile, David.

Holly Pervocracy
9 years ago

Shadow – I was figuring the woman sitting there was taking notes that will make for a hilarious entry on her feminist blog.

David K. Meller
David K. Meller
9 years ago

I’m no expert in the public relations of political or sociological conferences, but somehow I think that aiming Men’s rights issue conferences to fraternity jocks is NOT the best way to gain attendence or recognition.Wouldn’t the so-called “nerds” provide a far more fertile ground for recruiting?

At any rate, colleges and universities are so stuffed with feminists that sooner or later (sooner instead of later?) you women being hateful will do more recruiting for men’s rights than they could ever do for themselves!

Live and learn!

JenniferP
JenniferP
9 years ago

@Holly, I assumed she was reporting on it for the school paper, but your explanation works too!

Shadow
Shadow
9 years ago

@Holly

Also possible. I just figured (judging from the blurb in the OP) that the ad was vague enough to draw people that have no experience with the MRM, figuring that it was about ACTUAL issues that men may face. I reckon even a lot of feminists are only starting to hear about the MRM.

hellkell
hellkell
9 years ago

Our old friend Fidelbogen contributed a limerick in the comments. It’s the usual sadsack song and dance complete with reference to “shaming tactics.”

Shadow
Shadow
9 years ago

Also, this:

The group geared the event towards fraternity students at the college

combined with this:

talk about things like men’s rights when it comes to sexual misconduct investigations on-campus.

is just hysterical. It’s like the MRAs agree with Holly. They know that garden-variety misogynists aren’t going to want anything to do with them, so they go after a community that is well known to have many a rapist in their midst.

Male Rapists’ Advocates

Holly Pervocracy
9 years ago

Elam’s argument there seems to be something along the lines of:

“I wasn’t raped, and I’m not triggered by talk about rape. So it’s hilariously wrong that anyone would be bothered by it, and they just need to grow up and not be a rape survivor anymore.”

And the worst part is that he thinks his line of reasoning is original.

hellkell
hellkell
9 years ago

Of course these doofuses (doofi?) don’t believe in trigger warnings. The Amazing Asshole tried to trigger someone on purpose.

Graham
9 years ago

WRONG. The real reason nobody showed up is because MRAs are exactly like Christians in Pagan Rome, or the French Resistance in Nazi-occupied France, or or or… Or Morpheus’s team in The Matrix!!! They can’t show themselves in public because they’d be persecuted to death immediately by the feminazis.

Never forget Sharon Osborne!!!

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
9 years ago

@David:

You just wouldn’t understand from your privileged position. You don’t know what its like to constantly be harassed by women every day of your life, to be shamed and belittled day in and day out… You can’t imagine the sheer torture of even imagining having to go through more of it. No wonder men everywhere are avoiding being reminded once again how everyone despises them.

Oh palpable hypocrisy…

hellkell
hellkell
9 years ago

Trigger warnings are just basic courtesy, something Elam knows nothing about.

makomk
makomk
9 years ago

This… is not terribly surprising. One of the odder aspects of many feminist’s attitudes towards the Men’s Rights movement is how on Earth everyone manages to keep up the pretense that it’s part of some kind of widespread, evil anti-feminist backlash when in fact it’s utterly tiny. There are feminists that have far more influence than MRAs are ever likely to in my lifetime, and they have very little accountability for it even to the grassroots of their own movement – let alone if they start doing things that affect men!

Also, Holly, you’re missing a couple of obvious possible reasons why men might not attend. For example, perhaps they believe that women are so weak that they could never possibly harm their male partners, even if they’re armed, and that even if they do men should just shut up about it for the sake of protecting the women? Or that male rape victims should just put up with it because (if their rapist was male) a real man wouldn’t have let himself get raped or (if their rapist was female) a real man always wants sex. Possibly because they don’t fit your framing quite as well?

Holly Pervocracy
9 years ago

One of the odder aspects of many feminist’s attitudes towards the Men’s Rights movement is how on Earth everyone manages to keep up the pretense that it’s part of some kind of widespread, evil anti-feminist backlash when in fact it’s utterly tiny

Oh, no, we know it’s tiny. It’s just tiny and evil.

Anti-feminist backlash and plain old misogyny, unfortunately, extend far beyond the MRM.

Also, Holly, you’re missing a couple of obvious possible reasons why men might not attend. For example, perhaps they believe that women are so weak that they could never possibly harm their male partners, even if they’re armed, and that even if they do men should just shut up about it for the sake of protecting the women? Or that male rape victims should just put up with it because (if their rapist was male) a real man wouldn’t have let himself get raped or (if their rapist was female) a real man always wants sex. Possibly because they don’t fit your framing quite as well?

These aren’t reasons someone wouldn’t attend a meeting. These are randomly regurgitated MRM talking points.

Also, if you want to stand up for male rape survivors, maybe you should have a talk with Paul Elam, who thinks the rape of men is hilarious and that PTSD triggers are a sign of weakness.

Lauralot
9 years ago

The next time NWO reappears to tell us about how men are through with us and our days are numbered, let us remind him of the attendance of this symposium vs. a recent Slutwalk. Or turnout for a performance of the Vagina Monologues. Or anything, really.

Crumbelievable
Crumbelievable
9 years ago

They really sound like conspiracy theorists. The reason that the MRM can’t get widespread support clearly illustrates the feminazi plot to silence them. It isn’t possible that people don’t care because the cause or organization itself is silly. Of course not.

Kelly
Kelly
9 years ago

Not all misogynists are MRAs in fact they belong to other clubs like patriachal religions, government, the sex industry etc. Pretty sure they have loads of power. The mra is a part of the backlash against feminism only they’ve think of themselves as a legitimate social
justice movement…they are not, they are seeking to preserve their privileges which they confuse with rights. They should call themselves male privilege advocates it’d be honest.

As for your second paragraph, almost always whenever a man faces injustice it is by other men or by male created reasons, you know it I know it.

PS no one makes you shut up about it they just stop listening to you

Holly Pervocracy
9 years ago

Crumbelievable – Well, they also love to have it both ways. If their meeting had even mediocre turnout, this would prove that the MRM was reaching a tipping point and about to take the world by storm. Since it had no turnout, this proves just how persecuted and underground they are.

They’re careful that nothing could prove that they’re just silly and offensive.

makomk
makomk
9 years ago

Also, “MRM talking points”? Really?

This is the other reason I can’t stand dealing with men’s rights stuff. There’s only so much I can take of people using tactics straight out of Derailing for Dummies because of course it’s completely different when they’re doing it rather than on the receiving end before I lose what little faith in humanity I had left.

Holly Pervocracy
9 years ago

Where in Derailing for Dummies is: “I do not agree to talk about some completely random unrelated topic because you brought it up with only the most tenuous connection to the post subject, and furthermore it’s something we’ve discussed a million times, and furthermore it’s something we don’t actually disagree about”?

Maybe you should submit that one.

Or maybe you should continue thinking:
A) That feminists don’t believe men are abused or raped, or don’t care
and
B) That MRAs do care, which is the really hilarious part now.

MRAs only care about abuse of men when feminists discuss abuse of women; when it comes to actually helping male survivors, ignoring the issue is the best they can do. More often they’re joking about raping men, deliberately trying to trigger male survivors, and/or trying to deny that trauma from a rape could exist at all.

makomk
makomk
9 years ago

@Kelly: yaknow, that’s my entire freaking point. MRAs aren’t just part of some homogenous anti-feminist backlash towards traditional gender roles, in some cases the traditional gender roles and the feminist mainstream are on the same side, and then you run headlong into the spectacular trainwreck that is feminists insisting that no-one should be able to kick up a big fuss about them supporting problematic gender roles because everyone else does – but of course feminism is still synonymous with gender equality and anyone that argues against this must be opposed to both. Which is really, incredibly, wall-bangingly frustrating. At least when dealing with the inevitable male mysogynists there’s a reasonably large and influential movement out there that’s actually got my back.

Noadi
9 years ago

The MRM is the extreme end of misogyny, not the only misogynists there are. It makes them a good example to hold up, because there’s no ambiguity in what they are saying.

Kelly
Kelly
9 years ago

Well, you mentioned mentioned those talking points but they don’t stop men from attending these things (nobody can stop them but themselves) they should be reasons fir them to attend. Seeing as men already know about issues that face them this suggests several things:

1. Men don’t care enough about issues men face to attend

2.Men do care about actual issues they face and expend energy on actual causes and organisations

3.Men think that this is bullshit and probably think they are better men than them (which they probably are) 

 

jumbofish
9 years ago

Well why not cite which derail people are doing here? Most of us know it pretty well. (or is it where “mras try to imitate feminists to make their movement sound more official” kind of thing)

darksidecat
9 years ago

Frat boys? Aren’t they alphas? (I am imagining MRAL shaking his fist in the air and crying out in horror) XD

Moewicus
Moewicus
9 years ago

“At least when dealing with the inevitable male mysogynists there’s a reasonably large and influential movement out there that’s actually got my back.”

Until you call them on their misogyny. Then you’re just another mangina.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
9 years ago

I dunno. Something about going to a frat to talk about sexual misconduct stuff sounds… appropriate… until you realize that it’s from the point of view of men being the victims.

Maybe nobody showed up because it was too freakily backwards. LIke, to the point where all joking ceases and finally one guy in the front of the room mutters “dude…” under his breath, shaking his head.

jumbofish
9 years ago

@Kelly: yaknow, that’s my entire freaking point.

When did you say anything remotely like this?

Not all misogynists are MRAs in fact they belong to other clubs like patriachal religions, government, the sex industry etc. Pretty sure they have loads of power. The mra is a part of the backlash against feminism only they’ve think of themselves as a legitimate social
justice movement…they are not, they are seeking to preserve their privileges which they confuse with rights. They should call themselves male privilege advocates it’d be honest.

As for your second paragraph, almost always whenever a man faces injustice it is by other men or by male created reasons, you know it I know it.

PS no one makes you shut up about it they just stop listening to you

??????????

makomk
makomk
9 years ago

@Kelly: men are not a homogenous group, and even if they were that doesn’t mean they’d necessarily know about the issues that they face. I believe the early feminists actually ran into a similar issue actually – every woman not willing to talk about her issues because she believed that no-one else must feel the same way because no-one talked about them, and under all kinds of social pressure to pretend everything was OK.

@Holly: your hypothetical reasons are just as unrelated to the topic, it’s just that they’re more convenient hypothetical reasons. Also, I think you’re overestimating just how much feminism is helping male victims and how underestimating (for example) the problems with it driving them away through casual triggering content. The better bits of the MRA community at least seem to give them a chance to discuss their experiences, which is something.

Bostonian
9 years ago

“The better bits of the MRA community at least seem to give them a chance to discuss their experiences, which is something.”

What exact bits are those? So far, all I have seen is shaming and cruelty towards male rape victims in the MRM.

Kyrie
Kyrie
9 years ago

Wait, I’m lost, since when did feminism started to enforce traditionnal gender roles? 0o

Joanna
9 years ago

“I first have to read one of their warnings about what they are going to say in the article, apparently to keep me from freaking out when I read it. It rarely works. Probably because they don’t have trigger warnings for stupidity and lies. “

Trigger warning: Stupidity and lies!!!

Priceless.

Shadow
Shadow
9 years ago

Trigger warning: Stupidity and lies!!!

I actually fully back this warning for MRA posts since they do seem to trigger stupidity and lies from their followers

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
9 years ago

@makomk:

“I believe the early feminists actually ran into a similar issue actually – every woman not willing to talk about her issues because she believed that no-one else must feel the same way because no-one talked about them, and under all kinds of social pressure to pretend everything was OK.”

And yet this happened. Still a bigger turnout in age of slower communication, where a small disparate community couldn’t just log into a website to talk to other people who shared their views.

makomk
makomk
9 years ago

@Moewicus: I think you’re getting a tad confused between mysogyny and misandry. When dealing with male mysogynists the movement that has my back is called feminism, and feminists don’t tend to call people manginas. (Now calling people MRAs because they don’t think a husband cheating on his wife should ever be a good justification for her to beat him bloody and unconscious, that’s a different story.)

Kyrie
Kyrie
9 years ago

makomk: citation for feminists saying that it’s ok to beat cheating husbands, please?

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