TV detectives pore over semen stains, and find evidence of crimes. Over on A Voice for Men, B.R. Merrick pores over TV detectives poring over semen stains, and finds evidence of “anti-man mentality.” On Law & Order: SVU, he says,
Every time I chanced upon seeing a bit of it, someone somewhere said “semen.”
You know the show focuses on sex crimes, right? When you’re investigating sex crimes, I’d say the chances are pretty good you’re going to run across some semen from time to time.
This is a show that has been on the air for more than a decade, a spin-off from another program more than two decades long, dedicated to entertaining millions of Americans every week using salacious, graphic language about terrible crimes. Semen. Semen stains. Semen samples. Semen on a dead body. Crime. Law, order, crime, and semen.
Spam, eggs, bacon, semen and spam. Spam, spam, bacon, semen, and spam. Semen, semen, spam eggs sausage and semen.
Sorry, I got distracted.
Semen is disgusting, if I am to conclude anything from watching this program. How is it that a show that continually mentions semen in connection with horrific crime can remain so popular for over a decade?Â
Christopher Melonimania? No, nothing so straightforward as that. Clearly what we’re dealing with is anti-semen propaganda of the sneakiest sort.
Millions watch, but virtually no one notices. It is as if the ejaculation of semen is something that the world puts up with but secretly detests. Since only men make semen; since it is usually voluntarily ejaculated except for certain cases of rape and nocturnal emissions; and since the voluntary giving of this life-giving substance is usually frequent; what are men supposed to think if the culture embraces mainstream entertainment that virtually equates semen with crime?
If semen is outlawed only outlaws will produce semen?
The conclusions we are supposed to draw seem pretty obvious to me: Women and sexless children are the victims of semen, the victims of men. Men are too quick to indulge their semen-connected desires. Pornography is directly connected to men, semen, and the oftentimes unavoidable crimes that result.Â
So jerking off into a sock has been criminalized?
Once you indulge a penis, all bets are off. Unless, of course, he’s been thoroughly trained.
Penises can be trained? Really? I’ve had very little luck training mine.
Men who are raised not to take their feelings seriously will probably feel a little tinge that is quickly ignored when semen is mentioned in a silly television program. Men who are used to being teased will grin along with the giggling girls who laugh at a man whose penis is not only severed, but shredded in a garbage disposal, so that he can spend the last several decades of his life without one.Â
So Law & Order: SVU is secretly preparing men for a dystopian future in which all untrained penises will all be shredded in garbage disposals?
Stay tuned, I guess.
Yepp, every mention of semen on Law and Order SVU is definitely just a nefarious plot to make men feel bad about themselves for being men. Or something. I didn’t quite understand what his issue was.
No this guy is straight wrong. Its Melonimania. Its in the DSM-V.
Joke time! What’s long, hard, and filled with seamen?
A submarine!
I realized this doesn’t work as well when written out…oh well
Someone is spending way too much time thinking about semen.
Semen, and other bodily fluids, are handy when you’re investigating crimes. Physical evidence, how does it work?
Ah, B W Merrick, the resident AVfM gay dude!!
I pity this idiot, he must be aware that most of his readers at best are very uncomfortable with his presence but are kept in line by Elam, who tries to posit himself as a 60s hippy fighting the power.
This is the latest MRA fantasy, that women rape men and it’s a forgotten crime.
Apart from Joyce McKinney, has there ever been a case of non-statutory rape, of a man, by a woman? And if so, what tiny percentile does it constitute?
B. R. Merrick, I meant to say.
Isn’t Merrick the dude from the elephant man?
Is anyone else picturing disembodied penises right now?
Uhm yes. Obviously nowhere near the level of men raping women (or even men raping men), but that’s certainly no reason to be so dismissive about it.
All you need to do is remove the a in “seamen” and you’re good, cos that’s a long ass time spent underwater. I’m surprised dudes ain’t swimming in it!
Apart from Joyce McKinney, has there ever been a case of non-statutory rape, of a man, by a woman? And if so, what tiny percentile does it constitute?
Yes, there are certainly cases when women rape men, and erasing them isn’t helpful to anyone. I don’t know what percentage of rapes involve a female rapist and a male victim – it’s certainly a great deal smaller than the inverse, but even one rape is far too many, and there’s definitely a good deal more than one. Please let’s not go down the road of suggesting that women can’t be rapists or that men can’t be victims?
Anyway, like I was saying, semen is the fruit of the loins. You can barbecue it, boil it, broil it, bake it, saute it. There’s, uh, semen-kabobs, semen creole, semen gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried. There’s pineapple semen, lemon semen, coconut semen, pepper semen, semen soup, semen stew, semen salad, semen and potatoes, semen burger, semen sandwich. That- that’s about it.
So, would it be semen or penises that are the other white meat?
I thought children were the fruit of loins. Lauralot, are you back to baby eating again? I thought you were quitting! *smh in disappointment*
What kind of ignorant question is that? And why would you erase statutory anyway? Yeah, it’s not as prevalent, but wtf is with just striking it from the record?
Hey, I tried switching to kittens, but they’re just too fuzzy! Don’t judge me.
Not everyone who makes semen is a man, silly Merrick. That said, everybody who’s spewed semen in my presence has been a dude, and I’ve been pretty happy about it for the most part. Yay semen!
Penises can too be trained! Mine never soils the carpet and can roll over. I also I take it for walks twice a day.
I’m not even going to bother commenting on the article itself, because it is so ridiculous, but wanted to add stats to the discussion on male rape.
The extremely comprehensive CDC report from December on intimate violence showed that 91% of rape victims are female, but less than 1% of rapists are. The vast majority of rape against men is committed by men, but there certainly are female rapists. Also, most male rape victims are children, whereas most female victims are between the ages of 13 and 25.
It is horrific that these crimes against men, however terrible they may be, are being used to diminish the fact that the threat of sexual violence is something women have to live with all the time. One in five women will be the victim of a rape or attempted rape, almost always by someone they know, and if they dare to report it they are put on trial long before the attacker is.
My Ppenis can lift weights.
…no, not really, that would be painful.
@ Rutee, Shadow etc
I did several searches and couldn’t find anything – I was genuinely asking if anyone had heard of other cases?
Joyce McKinney is the only one that I could find.
It’s shocking that a show named Law and Order deals with crime, law, and order.
BR Merrick should look up the phrase “exactly what it says on the tin” to understand why the show deals with so much crime.
That show is horribly rape apologist, and is big on confused identity stranger rapes, which make up a tiny, tiny percentage of actual rapes.
Also, police brutality. So much police brutality. And Law and Order really sucks at knowing the law.
Also, seconding what viscaria said about the cissexist assumption that all people who make semen are men and that all men make semen.
@ Happy- Yeah, I know male survivors of rapes by women. And dismissive attitudes are really hurtful to them, and it leads to people erasing their experiences. Please please please go educate yourself. An apology would also be nice.
Police brutality is the reason why I stopped watching police tv show. Is it really impossible to solve a case without violence on suspects, or threats of violence, or threat of sending them to guantanamo, or at least ignoring their right?
/derail
Anyway, I’m pretty sure most children are not sexless. Just sayin’.