At the risk of splitting the “misogynist dickbaggery in the atheist movement” discussion in two, I really need to mention the amazingly well-timed Reddit meltdown of TheAmazingAtheist. It’s already been covered pretty well by PZ Myers and by Jen McCreight of BlagHag but, what the heck, I’ll throw in my two cents as well.
TheAmazingAtheist, for those who don’t follow these things, is (or was?) a popular atheist podcaster well-known, and beloved by some, for being something of a misogynist dickbag. He’s been on a anti-feminist kick for the last couple of months, winning himself many plaudits on Reddit’s Men’s Rights subreddit, though even the MR regulars couldn’t help but notice that he’s a bit of an ass.
Well, now he’s pretty much revealed, with a series of horrendous comments on Reddit, what a complete and utter asshole he is. Let me put a second TRIGGER WARNING here (for violent talk about rape), on top of the default TRIGGER WARNING I put on all my blog posts.
The context : a discussion (which he started) about the propriety of one feminist Redditor calling themself ICumWhenIKillMen. I’m not going to defend that nickname, which obviously makes light of violence in an obnoxious way. But AmazingAthiest was apparently so troubled by this sort of language that he felt compelled to spew forth a succession of violent rape threats.
Let me draw your attention to some of the highlights. (Click here to see his whole comment history on Reddit, where he comments as terroja).
Things started going south about 19 hours ago, when he told one detractor:
I’m going to rape you with my fist.
He followed this with:
I will make you a rape victim if you don’t fuck off.
It got worse:
I’m tired of being treated like shit by you mean little cunts and then you using your rape as an excuse. Fuck you. I think we should give the guy who raped you a medal. I hope you fucking drown in rape semen, you ugly, mean-spirited cow. Actually, I don’t believe you were ever raped! What man would be tasteless enough to stick his dick into a human cesspool like you? Nice gif of a turd going into my mouth. Is that kind of like the way that rapists dick went in your pussy? Or did he use your asshole? Or was it both? Maybe you should think about it really hard for the next few hours. Relive it as much as possible. You know? Try to recall: was it my pussy or my ass?
He continued in this fashion for some time, mocking those who pointed out that rape threats can be triggering, and regularly referring to his opponents as “cunts.” (Each of the following paragraphs is from a separate comment of his; click the quotes to see the full comments in question in their original context.)
BTW, you have to admit, when I told you that I hope you drown in rape semen, you got a little wet, didn’t you? It’s okay. We’re friends now. You can share.
Yes, you read that right: he was saying this shit to a rape victim.
Eventually, theAmazingAtheist found himself stopped short by this scathing critique, from the Redditor called veerserif.
I now know that, apart from being misguided, intentionally ignorant, and quick to resort to pathetic excuses, you are also a purposefully hurtful person with no sense of empathy, and no sense of remorse. You’re not just unintentionally uninformed, you actively turn what you know against people who should be deserving of your sympathy.
I was mistaken before. I thought, maybe, just maybe, after the circlejerking and the giggling, I could try showing you the stuff you said I didn’t highlight. I could show you what feminism has done for men, or maybe tell you about the existence of sex-positive feminism.
But this… this is a whole new level.
Your reputation, in my eyes, has fallen so far that dragging it back up to “mild disgust” would require nothing short of a miracle. You pretend to care about other people, but you really don’t. You like to think that you’re a decent human being, but you fall so far short of that you’re practically on separate planes of existence.
Deliberately triggering a rape victim? Equating being called out on your bullshit to the trauma of rape?
You know what you deserve? You don’t deserve death. You don’t deserve rape. You don’t even deserve some cosmically mandated, hilarious schadenfreude which would not only be brilliant, but just.
What you deserve is for everyone to know this side of you. You deserve for anyone who thought you were a good person to know what you’ve just done. You deserve your fans’ adoration turning to hatred, you deserve the judging stares and looks that people will give you. You deserve to be reminded, every day, of what you do and what you’ve done. You deserve to remember every day that there are people who suffer more than you, that there are people who are stronger and smarter, braver, more principled and better than you, in every way, until the day you realise exactly how wrong your actions have been.
I don’t want to see bodily harm visited on you, because I don’t want to see bodily harm visited on anyone. What I do want is for you – and, for that matter, every shitposter I’ve ever seen – to learn that anonymity is not an excuse.
At this point, theAmazingAtheist backed off, offered a whiny, petulant non-apology apology for, as he put it, “SOME of the statements I made,” and wondered aloud why people were still so mad at him.
He went on to make, yep, a little video about his experience, and to offer a weird and unconvincing “rebuttal” to PZ Myers’ comments on his meltdown. See PZ Myers’ post for links to the video, as well as the rebuttal itself (which is effectively re-rebutted by Myers). See here and here for a transcript of the video.
Naturally, there’s a discussion of the meltdown on ShitRedditSays as well.
One heartening sign in all this: the massive numbers of downvotes theAmazingAtheist got for his worst comments. I hope that a significant number of them were from actual Men’s Rights Redditors, and not only from people who came into the discussion from elsewhere on Reddit, but of course there is no way of knowing.
Will atheists and MRAs drop theAmazingAtheist like a hot rape-threatening potato? Or will they start rallying around him as some sort of heroic truth teller and rape threatener? Somehow I suspect there will be a bit of both.
I notice Boggi has gotten conspicuously silent…
I’m so sorry, Lorrdernie. Good on you for holding his feet to the fire.
Thanks Lorrdernie. I’m so sorry that on top of all the other unconscionable crap he pulled with you, he’s now crying about you “bullying” him. He obviously doesn’t know the meaning of the word.
I hope you’ve been okay through all of this.
he’s now switched to ‘i’m sorry, but it was in the heat of the moment so it’s not actually my fault’
Well, I guess we can all stop criticizing him now!
Well, he just said he was sorry. He completely owned up to it in that Formspring link.
I’ve been doing pretty alright guys. Not much you can do except for continuing to spread the public shaming.
I’m just so pissed off that he’s taking the “Heat of the moment didn’t really count” response and is refusing to give any sort of real apology. It’s one step above “I’m sorry you were offended.”
Honestly, feminists are some of the most vicious, unforgiving people I have ever observed (as long as it’s regarding men, of course). I distinctly remember a Feministe thread in which a bunch of people discussed the ways in which they wished Kyle Payne would commit suicide.
Not that I sympathize with Kyle Payne, but still. Jesus Christ.
‘i’m sorry, but it was in the heat of the moment so it’s not actually my fault’
Oh, he was posting in haste?
You know what? I’m sure I’ll get shit for this but at this point I really don’t care.
Regarding ICumWhenIKillMen’s username, I don’t fucking care. I really don’t. I don’t condone it, nor would I use a username like that, but when I have to see the following on practically every internet site I go to:
-women being called sluts, cunts, whores, bitches and skanks
-accusing women of being dirty golddiggers
-rape jokes
-sammich/kitchen jokes
-domestic violence jokes
-telling women they are only good for fucking and making babies
-smarmy pseudo-scientific dickbags talking about how naturally inferior women are
-anti-feminist and sometimes violent MRAs spamming every website with their BS
-sexually harrassing women when they participate on forums
-sexually harassing/soliciting women when they play MMO’s
-rape threats
-mansplaining
Forgive me if I can overlook one tastless username, because MRAs, sexists and general internet fuckwits are now getting a taste of their own medicine. Now you know what it’s like to be on the recieving end of gendered slurs. Thousands of examples exist of the above list I mentioned. This example of the Amazing Assholes vile rape threats? how many men are targeted with that kind of vitriol? What do you assholes have? one username, Sharon Osborne making a joke about a severed penis and “The End of Men” video by Hanna Rosin which you still dont shut up about. Oh, and a book written by an attempted murder (but all those famous and respected philosophers who gained respect by trashing women don’t count amirite? the bible’s calling for submission in women is just normal and natural yeah?)
Cry me a river.
Here’s what really gets me though. Women and feminists have been telling men for fucking decades that it’s hurtful when women are insulted and degraded by gendered slurs, sexual harassment and threats. What do we constantly hear in response to our concerns? “oh it’s just a joke” “oh your’re being too sensitive” “oh don’t be such a feminazi” “oh its men’s natural instinct to hit on you regardless of your feelings” “fuck you bitch/whore/cunt/slut” “get back in the kitchen”
But now when misogynist men start to get sexist or misandrous shit directed at them its ZOMG NATIONAL CATASTROPHE!!!
How convenient. Well guess what? maybe you guys should just learn to take a joke! maybe you’re just being to sensitive! it’s my freedom of speech to be a dick online! 😀
Doesn’t seem too fair does it? the sad thing is, it doesn’t have to be this way. We can make a collective effort to not be assholes to each other and drop the misogyny/misandry….the thing is, MRAs and MRA sympathizers, misogynists and trolls freely say sick shit about women all the time, and are unapologetic about it too. But then they screech about mean things said about men because their fee-fees are hurt? because some women are just doing the exact same thing they do to women? Boo-fucking-hoo you hypocrites. Do not expect me to care about one stupid username when you not only try to bully women into silence when they talk about the shit they have to put up with on and offline, but when you also take part in contributing to said shit.
Fuck MRAs. Fuck the Amazing Asshole. Fuck sexist hypocrites. And fuck MRAL for being the turd that he always is.
Thank you.
holy shit, everything that Quackers said, kind of extremely yes to all that
*standing ovation for Quackers*
I don’t care about “ICumWhenIKillMen” either. I didn’t even read it as a threat, I read it the same way I did the old baby eating jokes I’ve seen in atheist communities. If people are going to say absolutely ridiculous, untrue shit about you, and how horrible you are, you might as well turn it into a joke.
That said, I also respect the poster massively for changing; apparently it was triggering folks, so yeah, not acceptable to keep in use.
Quackers, who actually has a problem with the username “ICumWhenIKillMen”? Seriously. I’m seeing a bunch of smug feminists going on about “all the privileged men who have a problem with it”, but not a whole bunch of men who actually seem to have a problem with it… despite the fact that it’s way worse than your average gender-based insult toward women, except on the MRA sites. I mean, I have a problem with it in the sense that if you want people to stop using the c-word or whatever, you can’t use the word “dick” or go around with the name “ICumWhenIKillMen”. Yes, that does mean holding yourself to a higher standard. You want people to change? Set a goddamn example.
Nonpologies are not apologies, you twit.
ARe you aware of the genesis of this at all?
Lorrdernie, I’m really sorry you had to deal with this fuckwaddery.
Also, asshole women bash men all the time. It’s unfortunately not on the internet, because the internet is male-dominated, but it doesn’t mean it doesn’t occur. People love to bash the other group, whatever that might be. I’m sick up to my fucking eyeballs of this goddamn bullshit. I try to be empathetic and avoid gendered slurs because some people on this very site told me it was inconsiderate, and I understand that. But then I get shit like “ICumWhenIKillMen”, and I’m told to just shut up, because some other men have used gendered slurs? Fuck that. And by the way, BY THE WAY, it’s a tautological- women and men use the word “dick” MORE than men use the c-word- and it’s a gendered insult, no one ever calls a woman a dick- but somehow the c-word is “worse”, really for no reason, so Quackers can get all self-righteous about it, even though when you get right down to it there is no bias in gendered insults. It comes back to my senior thesis on men as disposable- it’s worse when a woman’s feelings are hurt.
Finally, the fact that Holly and other “moderate” feminists are supporting Quackers (and the fact that Quackers herself claims to be “moderate” or whatever) is very telling.
mral, maybe we dont have a problem with it because we know we’re the dominant group and this shit is totally dog bites man. did you consider that?
Ugghhh.. apparently in his rebuttal to PZ, TAA claimed he wasn’t really a threat because he’s a submissive. Seriously? While most of the stories of sexual assault in teh BDSM community I’ve heard of are Dominants non-consensually abusing submissives, sometimes submissives do the assaulting. There is nothing inherent in the roles you take in most of your kinky play that precludes you from being a dangerous douchebag. I hope any Dommes he plays with sees his meltdown because I think it will seriously damage his chances of finding partners in the scene, if not for his attitudes towards women then just for how viciously he turns on someone who displeases him.
You hold yourself to no standard at all MRAL, so do not lecture others at all.
Every time you have bad day you go on a total meltdown rampage.
Lorrdernie:
So I’m the rape victim that he repeatedly threatened, I thought you guys might be interested in the non apology he gave me, in which he accused me of bullying him for asking him to issue a public apology. Good stuff. http://i.imgur.com/DDWHJ.png
You are right, he didn’t make an apology at all. Even his nuclear meltdown YouTube video is a steaming pile of self-pitying bullshit. The only person he feels sorry for is himself.
I’m sorry you had to put up with such an obnoxious narcissistic asshole. I urge anyone who likes him to unsubscribe until it is clear he changes his repulsive attitudes. I hope we guys at Manboobz and other “mysogyny-watch” websites helped you out and made you feel better.
*hugs*
Catherine:
Has TJ Kincaid/terroja/the Appalling Asshole got any empathy for anyone? Hard to say, it doesn’t seem so judging by his narcissism and the colossal chip on his shoulder. His being a loud, angry asshole to anyone who upset him on the Internet probably hasn’t resulted in a smackdown like this before. Will he learn? I doubt it. Aggression is lauded and encouraged by some men, which is why there’s a phrase “toxic masculinity”, it being unhealthy in high, unrefined doses. What is scary is that his frequently irrational, vitriolic ranting on YouTube has over a quarter of a million subscribers and nearly a hundred million views. As I said on the forums, that sort of following for someone like him makes me weep for humanity.
Well, he does conceive of feminism as some demonic horde out to “repress his sexuality” and emasculate him. And like many other “heavyweight intellectuals” on YouTube he has an ego as large as his subscriber count.
Becoming the Thunderf00t of Feminism is a fate worthy of him. (Thunderf00t is another very popular, very arrogant Youtuber who went down an obsessive anti-Islamic streak. Long story short, he generalized all Muslims as terrorists, much like TheAmazingAsshole generalizes all feminists as evil manhaters. Another popular YouTuber Pat Condel, just as haughty as thunderf00t, went down a similar road.)
@katz
Please drop you’re suspicions. I made numerous Facebook posts about TheAmazingAsshole’s misogynistic bullshit.
https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1392204012
Scroll down a few posts. A lot of them deal with his bullshit.
Also, remember my comments often await moderation from Futrelle, so it takes a while to get across.
I hope my input was substantial enough. Lorrdernie, I am sorry for the suffering you endured today. TheAmazingAsshole can get bent for all I care.
Lorrdernie, thanks for posting, I’m so sorry you had to endure that unbelievable douchebag, and his non-apology.
Sharculese, men aren’t the dominant group, I’ve categorically stated I don’t subscribe to that notion.
Secondly, that’s more tautological logic- if men are offended, it’s because they aren’t used to being on the receiving end of violence (hahaha, as if, check the rates of violent crime for everything except rape). But if they aren’t offended, it’s because they know it’s “no threat” due to them being the dominant group.
i c wut u did thar
@ Quackers- Congratulations! You get this shiny new gift back of multicolored, gold-plated internets! That was truly epic
@MRAL- You know what? Being an example is fucking exhausting. And the anger/ sadness/ whatever is used constantly to condone heinous shit perpetuated against them. So you can FUCK RIGHT OFF.
I’ll say it again. YOU CAN FUCK RIGHT OFF.
I do hold myself to a standard, I’ve made it a point to not do gender-based insults any more. I know I can come off as a little abrasive, but I have strong emotional reactions sometimes and I won’t apologize for that.