Sure, Man Boobz 2011 Troll of the Year NWOslave may live in an alternate reality — but he at least seems well-grounded in that reality. What might happen if he were to suddenly ingest a tab or ten of LSD?
I think I have an answer to that question. Meet blogger and conspiracy theorist Jay Dyer, a self-described “controversialist, writer, comedian, debater, and philosopher/theologian.”
That’s a mouthful, and Jay more or less lives up to it, delivering stream of consciousness rants that range from Aleister Crowley (he’s not a fan) to the evils of women dressing like Hannah Montana. Plus he quotes the Bible from time to time.
Actually, that description doesn’t even begin to capture Jay’s peculiar charms. So, without further ado, I present to you some highlights from an essay titled The United Skanks of Amerika that Jay wrote with the assistance of someone identified only as M.B.
Amerika has become one, big, nasty, black metal mosh pit. Satan said to Adam and Eve “do what thou wilt,” Satanist Aleister Crowley said, “do what thou wilt” and the gospel of Amerika is “do what thou wilt.” … Churches are dominated by fat matriarchal women and homosexuals. Women open their purses and the priests of Ashtoreth bow and tell them whatever they want to hear. … Amerika is a play land – a bigger, gayer Disney world. It’s middle-aged moms on facebook, donning Montana garb. The nation is frozen in perpetual adolescence and arrested development.
After this dramatic opening, Jay offers up the strangest capsule version of American history I’ve ever seen:
Started by a bunch of tee-totaler puritan gnostics, this nation has jumped to the opposite extreme and become a cess pool of flesh. In fact, in the East Coast punk scene, kids are now eating chunks of each others’ flesh. Let that sink in. In the West Coast gay scene, it is now an honor to receive AIDS from trendy gays.
Then Jay gets around to the “skanks” of the essay’s title:
Women of this country, especially young women, are perpetual princesses stuck in a perpetual mirror glance, coated in chemicals and striving for the most unnatural goals – to be a manwoman. For a sensible male to get with one of these creatures is in serious danger. But watch out – before long, they’ve left you for another woman and taken your fake Federal Reserve notes. They get half of your all-seeing eyes. Whores with your Horus. Dressed like complete whores, will they soon be completely naked?
But young men don’t get off any easier in Jay’s critique:
The average twenty-something male is now a fat, gamer, feminized, emo freak, who spits every time he lisps, because he can’t form sentences.
Neither do middle-aged men:
Grown men – baby-boomer dads – collect comics and play Dungeons & Dragons. And if they don’t, they stare at pixelated football and the Maso-kabbalist videodrome complex.
Yes, he really did just say “Maso-kabbalist videodrome complex.”
Jay also has some issues with higher education:
The “wise men” of this culture are the Marxist, gay, feminist, druid college professors, who, if they have children, drive them to white horror core rap concerts. Just like the sociology professor mom involved with Pyscho Sam whom her daughter met over Myspace.
And lower education:
That any parent would put their children in public school is a sign of apparent hatred of their kids. Why would anyone put their kids in a government re-education camp? Public schools are prisons where the teachers screw students and students get doped up on pills become homosexual.
When they’re not shooting each other, that is:
[P]arents can’t understand why their children shoot each other at school. The[y] shoot one another at school because they are possessed by the demonic culture. And while you stupidly play golf and make scrapbooks, your kids are worshipping Lucifer, who, according to you, doesn’t exist.
Women working! Men raising kids! It’s all one big air-conditioned nightmare for Jay:
The family is now become stay-at-home dads that care for the 1.3 kids, while moms climb the skyscraper and has sex with the CEO for more fake fed notes. If it’s not this, it’s “my two dads.”
Preach it, Jay!
Amerika is just this – Chuck E. Cheese speeding at you on a Harley, holding Crowley’s Magick in Theory and Practice,with Jenna Jameson mounted on the back. …
Amerika is krunk. Amerika is funk. Amerika is junk. Amerika is Lil’ Jon having sex with Lady Liberty. …
Rationalism is what birthed this country, but it morphed into utter irrationality. Thomas Paine became Spongebob and Spongebob is Thomas Paine.
I think I’ll just leave it at that. Oh, there’s more — much, much more — in Jay’s little manifesto, but my poor brain can only take in so much in one sitting without exploding.
NOTE: I discovered Jay’s essay through a link on MGTOWforums.com; the dude posting the link described it as “one of the best essays about feminism and life in the US … By far one of the most accurate essays I have ever had the pleasure of reading.” It got a mixed reaction; the consensus seemed to be that while he made some good points, Jay might just be a little too obsessed with Aleister Crowley and the Masons.
EDITED TO ADD: Also, if middle-aged women want to wear some sort of “Montana garb,” I’d suggest they go with Patsy, not Hannah. Patsy Montana was awesome!
I feel terrible today and had a billion nightmares and no self esteem!
Who wants to indulge in Ami therapy? o: (or should I start screaming at people a bit first xD I can do that! RUTEE YOU SUCK AND YOU’RE UGLY!!! ZHINXY YOU’RE AN ALPHA BITCH WITH A DEMON SPAWN CHILD!!!! SPEAR… Um…. YOU DRESS LIKE YOU’RE A TIME LORD!!!!)
And yes, that’s misamidry.
ZHINXY YOU’RE AN ALPHA BITCH WITH A DEMON SPAWN CHILD!!
<3
That I love you and not MRAL is misandry.
Is Manboobz now offering free therapy to people other than MRAL? I could totally use some! Me, me! I can’t wait to tell you all about how much worse my life is than yours! I suppose it’s possible that the other posters here have troubles too, but my pain doesn’t really mean anything unless it’s worse than everybody else’s.. so I’m going to go ahead and ignore that possibility.
Also off the table: any sort of discussion of how the depression might be warping my perception of things. That’s entirely impossible, because I am a perfect human being and all of my perceptions directly reflect reality. I’m sadder than your average person because my life is objectively worse.
/sarcasm
BTW, I needed a band name for the story I’m writing.
I called them Videodrome Complex.
Katz, Videodrome Complex almost sounds like a new-wave band, but it could work. How about Hot Buttered Manatees? Nah, that’s too Jimmy Buffett cover band. Slobbering Crotch Maws?
MRAL, I thought you were on a time out? You should learn when to quit.
Yes, that is misandry.
MRAL is going to be doing this even after the cast turns over (it actually has already, a bunch of ppl that used to post aren’t here nemore and MRAL is just arguing w/ new regulars xD ) a few more times : It’s like I ask NWO, what does he imagine his life in the future? Trolling us for another month, then 2 months, then before he knows it it’s been another year, and then another, and then another? : I mean I know what it’s like to lose yourself in just being depressed and angry and using something as your stressball, you think it’ll eventually get better and it’s just releasing stress but before you know it, it’s become just a way for you to get by without fixing anything and another year has passed and another… and another >_>
@Jay: Is the quote I gave real, or not?
Define real!
SRS, the quote may have been written by the person you attributed it to, therefore ‘real’ in that sense, but whether or not what he was wrote concerns an observable, factually accurate phenomenon is up for grabs. I don’t know, and I don’t care–I come here to mock misogynists and hand out with geeky nerdy types and have fun with them, and occasionally practice my google-fu.
Just because somebody writes something making a claim about something doesn’t mean that something is real, fer crying out loud.
Do you believe everything everybody (you agree with) writes is “real” or “true”?
@Katz: Conspiracy theories are also really hard to dispel because you can just classify anyone who presents evidence to the contrary as being “in on it.”
This. My favorite example from years back are the students in my argumentation class who wanted to argue creationism and tried to disavow fossils with the theory that God let the Devil make them to test our faith.
A colleague told a student who wanted to argue the government killed JFK and covered it up that it would hard to bring proof of the claim if, as student claimed, all government documents were false. A whole bunch of people writing feverishly about how the gov’t lied and killed JFK is not in fact “objective” proof that the goverment killed JFK!
I’m in on everything >:D
Aliens exist!!!
See!! I exist and this quote exists therefore its true!!!!
“When you’re brainwashed with relativism, you build a psychological trap for yourself wherein you cannot recognize objective facts. These facts are public and are objective in Tragedy and Hope, for instance, yet your interaction, as well as almost everyone else here, shows the inability of most human beings to be objective.
Quigley was no “conspiracy theorist” but rather a geo-political analyst of the highest caliber. ”
This is an actual troll, right? Not someone trolling just to be a pain in the ass, someone taking the piss. Nobody could possibly write that and be serious. Right?
I’m also confused about why we’re supposed to just assume that colluding with Communists is Evil. Did the troll get confused and think this was Stormfront?
I tend to prefer my punk a bit older…
And yes, that is misandry.
(Because the band are wearing eyeliner)
And I have a song specially for MRAL!
When Johnny did it he was funny, though. I guess he must have been an alpha or something.
Why are people crying out loud? 🙁
@Jumbofish: I believe that the statistical likelihood that sentient life has evolved on other planets is true–but i also know that there is not sufficient proof (YET), so I class that as a belief.
I also like to think that sentient life advanced enough to have developed space travel is too smart to hang around this little backwater planet making crop circles, etc, but that’s just me ;>
XD!
*that is a real quote and I am a real person so feel free to really quote me to prove it is real*
The whole crop circle thing is a bit baffling. We, the super advanced intersteller travellers, will smush your corn! Just watch us make pretty patterns! And what we are telling you with the patterns is…we like agricultural graffiti?
I do have to say, our troll quality is really dropping fast.
I mean, since NWO won the Big Enchlada, he’s been mostly not around, and only half-heartedly spitting and hating all over the place.
DKM–whassup there? He’s so missing out on things that the dolls are posting more (and it’s totally heartbreaking–I warn you all I cried all over the place at Toy Story, and this is pushing all my buttons).
What’s his name that I’ve sworn off speaking to (actually I think there are two wosstheirnames), meh, even when let back on, the old sparkle and disgustingstinky magic is gone.
New ones–milling around in a bit of a herd, not really any who stand out.
Maybe they’re all in a new year slump, or something.
I have a theory why NWO isn’t around and of course it revolves around me xD
The Meller Doll posts are really sad 🙁
@CassandraSays: “agricultural graffitti” is a totes cool phrase. But yeah, totally.
It’s just…..if I had sooper cool spacecraft and could go zipping around, I wouldn’t bother with that sort of thing. And maybe I’m projecting or something, but there’s just no sense.
Ditto abductions and mystical lights and stuff.
@Ami: The doll posts are heartbreaking and getting more so!
And of course the theory revolves around you: manboobz is amicentric!
(You haven’t seen any crop circles in your vicinity, though, have you?)
The whole “anal probe” thing is even funnier. Um, why exactly do we think the aliens are doing this? For what purpose? They travelled all the way here just for that?
People are funny.
In the words of the eponymous Paul from the film released this year, “Why does everyone always assume that? What am I doing? Am I harvesting farts? How much can I learn from an ass?”
Isn’t it obvious? They come to Earth to do sexual tourism. And before going home, they each other small crop-notes (from the sky it’s small) about the quality of the place (parking places, local food,…)
So basically crop circles are the Yelp of a more advanced civilization.