Sure, Man Boobz 2011 Troll of the Year NWOslave may live in an alternate reality — but he at least seems well-grounded in that reality. What might happen if he were to suddenly ingest a tab or ten of LSD?
I think I have an answer to that question. Meet blogger and conspiracy theorist Jay Dyer, a self-described “controversialist, writer, comedian, debater, and philosopher/theologian.”
That’s a mouthful, and Jay more or less lives up to it, delivering stream of consciousness rants that range from Aleister Crowley (he’s not a fan) to the evils of women dressing like Hannah Montana. Plus he quotes the Bible from time to time.
Actually, that description doesn’t even begin to capture Jay’s peculiar charms. So, without further ado, I present to you some highlights from an essay titled The United Skanks of Amerika that Jay wrote with the assistance of someone identified only as M.B.
Amerika has become one, big, nasty, black metal mosh pit. Satan said to Adam and Eve “do what thou wilt,” Satanist Aleister Crowley said, “do what thou wilt” and the gospel of Amerika is “do what thou wilt.” … Churches are dominated by fat matriarchal women and homosexuals. Women open their purses and the priests of Ashtoreth bow and tell them whatever they want to hear. … Amerika is a play land – a bigger, gayer Disney world. It’s middle-aged moms on facebook, donning Montana garb. The nation is frozen in perpetual adolescence and arrested development.
After this dramatic opening, Jay offers up the strangest capsule version of American history I’ve ever seen:
Started by a bunch of tee-totaler puritan gnostics, this nation has jumped to the opposite extreme and become a cess pool of flesh. In fact, in the East Coast punk scene, kids are now eating chunks of each others’ flesh. Let that sink in. In the West Coast gay scene, it is now an honor to receive AIDS from trendy gays.
Then Jay gets around to the “skanks” of the essay’s title:
Women of this country, especially young women, are perpetual princesses stuck in a perpetual mirror glance, coated in chemicals and striving for the most unnatural goals – to be a manwoman. For a sensible male to get with one of these creatures is in serious danger. But watch out – before long, they’ve left you for another woman and taken your fake Federal Reserve notes. They get half of your all-seeing eyes. Whores with your Horus. Dressed like complete whores, will they soon be completely naked?
But young men don’t get off any easier in Jay’s critique:
The average twenty-something male is now a fat, gamer, feminized, emo freak, who spits every time he lisps, because he can’t form sentences.
Neither do middle-aged men:
Grown men – baby-boomer dads – collect comics and play Dungeons & Dragons. And if they don’t, they stare at pixelated football and the Maso-kabbalist videodrome complex.
Yes, he really did just say “Maso-kabbalist videodrome complex.”
Jay also has some issues with higher education:
The “wise men” of this culture are the Marxist, gay, feminist, druid college professors, who, if they have children, drive them to white horror core rap concerts. Just like the sociology professor mom involved with Pyscho Sam whom her daughter met over Myspace.
And lower education:
That any parent would put their children in public school is a sign of apparent hatred of their kids. Why would anyone put their kids in a government re-education camp? Public schools are prisons where the teachers screw students and students get doped up on pills become homosexual.
When they’re not shooting each other, that is:
[P]arents can’t understand why their children shoot each other at school. The[y] shoot one another at school because they are possessed by the demonic culture. And while you stupidly play golf and make scrapbooks, your kids are worshipping Lucifer, who, according to you, doesn’t exist.
Women working! Men raising kids! It’s all one big air-conditioned nightmare for Jay:
The family is now become stay-at-home dads that care for the 1.3 kids, while moms climb the skyscraper and has sex with the CEO for more fake fed notes. If it’s not this, it’s “my two dads.”
Preach it, Jay!
Amerika is just this – Chuck E. Cheese speeding at you on a Harley, holding Crowley’s Magick in Theory and Practice,with Jenna Jameson mounted on the back. …
Amerika is krunk. Amerika is funk. Amerika is junk. Amerika is Lil’ Jon having sex with Lady Liberty. …
Rationalism is what birthed this country, but it morphed into utter irrationality. Thomas Paine became Spongebob and Spongebob is Thomas Paine.
I think I’ll just leave it at that. Oh, there’s more — much, much more — in Jay’s little manifesto, but my poor brain can only take in so much in one sitting without exploding.
NOTE: I discovered Jay’s essay through a link on MGTOWforums.com; the dude posting the link described it as “one of the best essays about feminism and life in the US … By far one of the most accurate essays I have ever had the pleasure of reading.” It got a mixed reaction; the consensus seemed to be that while he made some good points, Jay might just be a little too obsessed with Aleister Crowley and the Masons.
EDITED TO ADD: Also, if middle-aged women want to wear some sort of “Montana garb,” I’d suggest they go with Patsy, not Hannah. Patsy Montana was awesome!
hmm…
There we go 😀
What a strange little person. Elsewhere he seems to like Hannah Arendt’s work, so I guess he can allow for the odd exception to the No LadyBrains rule.
Weather modification conspiracy? LOL> Zbigniew Brzezinski doesn’t exist, does he? He also didn’t write Between Two Ages, either.
I’m a huge Ayn Rand fan, too. Also, I loves me some ladies.
Again, satire and tongue-in-cheekyness is lost on you poor folk.
Christ, you are a boring as hell troll.
Can you give us some more examples of what you consider satire so we can compare and contrast against what you’ve done so far? 😀
For your sake I hope that’s tongue-in-cheek too
Have there been any other examples of satire and parody on this site since you’ve started posting here? And can you point them out? 😀
I want to see if you judge “satire” the same way everybody else here (and in the rest of the world) does 😀
“Also, I loves me some ladies.”
Wanting to fuck ladies = loving them. For real, you guys.
Huh. I always figured the set of ladies that jay008 personally finds attractive was a subset of all ladies, but apparently the sets are equivalent?
We have other trolls who define “women” as “people I would like to have touching my penis.” Do they and jay008 have identical taste in women? Or is the women vs ladies distinction important here? So many questions.
Um Jay, two people doing something together because they both find it sexy is not a bad thing. Not every woman expects a wedding ring offered for every sexual performance.
Jay, I’m a whopping five feet tall. The day a guy can toss my weak ass lady frame to the floor after I’ve bound him in two hundred feet of cotton rope is the day I consent to being horse whipped.
This is not satire. If he was against conspiracy theorists and used his blog to make fun of them, then his rant would fall into the category of satire. Ranting about something you strongly believe is not satire.
Are you saying that your weather modification stuff was tongue in cheek, or are you making fun of us for being skeptical about it? Your satire stinks because it isn’t witty and it doesn’t have a point.
In Greek and Roman literature, where satire originates, the point was precisely to mix truth with the absurd. The point wasn’t always to do “comedy,” though satire can be funny.
Weather modification and weather warfare dates back to the 1960s, which shows how out of touch you people are. I’m willing to bet none of you have even read a page of Brzezinski.
The problem being that what you think is true is already absurd. So mixing it with…more absurdity just ends up being a mess.
Jay, give it up.
I’m pretty sure that the folks here have read plenty of satire and understand quite well what its intended uses are, and what it looks like when well done. All you foot stomping isn’t going to change our opinion of your piece. And that is how writing works, some people will love what you say and others won’t. If you find it upsetting to have people criticize your work then stick to those who appreciate it.
If you wish to educate us on the uses of satire and good examples, then provide reference sources that help show where we’ve gone wrong.
Caraz,
Which means that all he’s done is satirized himself. Isn’t it our job to do that for him?
So Jay, how much Aristophanes have you read? Do you prefer Lysistrata or the Birds, or perhaps the Clouds or the Frogs? For the Romans, do you prefer Terence or Plautus? Or perhaps you like some prose– maybe the Satyricon is more your speed?
2012, at least this far, is the year of boring, shitty trolls.
I had to read Lysistrata once. That was boring as shit, and also didn’t make sense. Old literature is stupid. I haven’t read any of that other stuff.
I’m a fan of Ovid’s Books of Love myself, and some of the Metamorphoses, but Aristophanes was a bit of a bore. We did quit a bit last semester in my graduate class. I could care less what you think of my writing, I’m having fun interacting with people who aren’t aware of geo-political stragegems that were made public decades ago.
But Lauralot, isn’t that every year?
To all my dear fans here at manboobz. Also, I have seen the light and you are all correct: the Rand Corporation, Herman Kahn, Carroll Quigley and MI6 also don’t exist, either.
http://jaysanalysis.com/2012/01/29/conspiriana-cloak-and-dagger-and-retards/