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Some of those video game princesses ain’t so Peachy

Why can't they all be like Princess Peach?

It’s almost impossible to catalogue all the ways men are oppressed by women in contemporary gynocratic society. There are so many! For example, did you know that men are oppressed by female characters in video games? I know, right? The last bastion of red-blooded manliness, invaded by imaginary ladies!

Luckily, the fellows at MGTOWforums.com are on the case, exposing this foul virtual misandry. I Am started off a recent discussion on the subject by asking

WTF is with empowered women in video games now? …

I see a new trend in the video/computer game world and that is the increase in strong playable female characters.

Now, I am no hardcore gamer but I do play computer games often and the recent one I have been playing recently is Shogun 2 total war. Now for those who don’t know what this game is, it is a strategy game based on the military of feudal Japan. I recently bought an upgrade for the game the other day and guess what one of the strongest military units was? Nuns. I shit you not. The nuns had an attack 20% -40% higher than most units in the game. Somehow I doubt that in real life a nun would have swung a sword or used a spear faster and harder than a feudal warlord, and this game was based on history.

Clearly nuns are incapable of manlike swordplay, though it is true that they are capable reenacting famous internet panda sneeze videos. (I have seen video proof of this.) But Shogun 2 does not depict them sneezing like pandas. It depicts them fighting.

This is an outrage because video games are meant to be a perfectly accurate reflection of reality.  Obviously there is nothing even slightly unrealistic about any of this:

Most of us dudes are in fact capable of karate-chopping heads in two. We just don’t like to show off all the time.

I think I have the right to ask steam and other gaming companes: WTF with the subliminal brainwashing? What now when I buy or play a game women will be doing all the ass kicking? …

I call bullshit on this subject. Video games are the last place for guys to hang out and now women are taking over. Why not just save us the trouble and instead of eliminating our fantasy world just throw us in work camp to provide for thier bastard children (literally speaking) while they shit all over us…wait they already do that.

I Am is not the only dude who’s noticed this alarming femtrend. Goldenfetus added his observations:

I’ve noticed this too, and it drives me insane. Was co-oping Gears 3 last month and there’s a point where 2nd player has to take over a female character. Almost ruined the game for me. It may seem minor, but once you’re aware of this type of brainwashing it’s impossible to ignore. There’s no way a slim female could keep up with the massive battle-hardened male Gears in that kind of environment. They would be a liability as they are in real life combat.

Exactly! By contrast, the male characters in Gears of War 3 are all completely accurate representations of real-world men.

This is what dudes look like, for real.

Goldenfetus continued:

You’ll see the same thing in most stat-based role-playing games as well, where you have the option of a female player character – like Fallout, Elder Scrolls, Mass Effect, Dragon Age, D&D, etc. The women never have any strength or intelligence penalties compared to the males. … They want to give the impression that people of any race, gender, and sexual-orientation are interchangeable – that there are no differences in ability between them, and that only a bigot could think otherwise. I’m sick of it too.

At the very least, female characters should be depicted as carriers of cooties.

Despite the very serious subject matter – video game misandry is never funny! – Xtc tried to lighten the mood with a little humor:

It would be hilarious to portray the female characters realistically. If you chose the female character in your FPS [First Person Shooter] she would have to move very slowly, dragging the gun around. You could build in some extra shake to the crosshairs to represent hopeless accuracy. Every time you needed to reload your gun, instead of just pressing a button, you’d have to find a male character and go through some flirting dialogue options to persuade him to do it for you. One out of every four missions the game would tell you that you were sitting out this one due to ‘women’s issues’.

Calloway, for his part, offered some historical perspective:

This is nothing new. I got heavy into gaming back in the late 90’s and even back then they had Tomb Raider, S.I.N., etc. Even in the original Unreal, you played as a big-breasted female.

I saw a documentary on the making of the original Tomb Raider once. The lead character, Lara Croft, was originally going to be a man. They saw him as an Indiana Jones-type character. Then, one of the designers suggested it be a woman because “if you’re going to be playing a game for hours, you might as well have something good to look at”. …

When you first take the red pill, it’s amazing the things you see. It’s as if you had blinders on before, and all of sudden they’ve been removed, allowing you to actually understand what you’ve been seeing.

Yep. And what you’ve been seeing is Lara Croft’s ass. Lara Croft’s ass oppresses men! The red pill tells me so!

Also, those tiny misandrist shorts just make the gynpression worse.

Now we come to the clincher.

When you try to get romantic with the imaginary ladies in video games, they don’t act like Roissy and those dudes say ladies act. I mean, you can’t even neg them! As Dave sadly pointed out:

I remember about 12 years ago playing the Baldur’s Gate rpg series and there were some romance dialog paths between your character and some of the women who could join your group but you had to treat them very nice. You couldn’t give them any attitude or make fun of them otherwise it would be over.

Basically you have to be a total mangina towards women in most games if you want to bed them.

Even imaginary ladies are stuck up bitches!

The horror!

 

I had a

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shaenon
12 years ago

MRAs could play Christian video games.

http://www.gamespot.com/left-behind-eternal-forces/reviews/left-behind-eternal-forces-review-6162370

Only males can become priestlike disciples and handyman builders, whereas only women can become nurses. Female units are actually designated as such and given ridiculous titles like “Friend Woman” and “Medic Woman,” a sexual distinction that unsurprisingly isn’t extended to their male counterparts.

The Gamespot review doesn’t mention it, but the few professions allowed for female characters (I think it’s nurse, entertainer, and maybe one other thing) are either useless or less useful than the comparable male profession (for example, the male doctors have more healing power than the nurses). So anyone playing the game quickly learns just to not put any women on their team. The MRA message lives in Christ!

I’ve been target shooting all of once in my life and I can’t say I don’t suck at it, but I can load and fire a damn gun. Learning to reload a gun takes all of, what, a minute?

kiki
kiki
12 years ago

Given that Gears of War is basically What Video Games Would Look Like If Rob Liefeld Made Them* – absurd, lumbering, homoerotic meatpiles wielding guns that look like two VCRs taped together – I was pleasantly taken aback by the fact that Gears 3’s female characters (the first in the series) weren’t sporting chrome-plated battlekinis but were just wearing the same stuff as everybody else. I’m not averse to a gratuitously scantily-clad female video game character or two, but I thought this showed admirable restraint for such a juvenile (though enjoyable) franchise.

* So is Cliffy B the Rob Liefeld of video games, or is Rob Liefeld the Cliffy B of comics?

Major Kong
Major Kong
12 years ago

“The nuns had an attack 20% -40% higher than most units in the game.”

My father went to Catholic school in the 1950s. The way he described nuns, I’m surprised the number isn’t higher. I think I’d rather face a feudal warlord.

Captain Bathrobe
Captain Bathrobe
12 years ago

@Fatman,

I remember that! Also, I believe the only option straight women had was to woo the stick-up-the-ass paladin wannabe. I don’t believe same-sex relationships were even an option.

katz
12 years ago

Ye gods, unitled, that video is completely hideous. Even all the youtube commenters think so.

Polliwog
Polliwog
12 years ago

ng85 writes, “Well, if female empowerment in games prevents escort missions where you protect some whining woman who keeps walking into walls, then I’m all for them.”

I think this one is accidentally onto something.

I have to admit, I love that these nitwits can manage to be sexist against a line of code. It must take real effort to get so involved in woman-hating that you can manage not to laugh at yourself while arguing that NPCs on escort quests routinely walk into walls, stroll merrily into a gang of enemies, or manage to get themselves stuck on fenceposts not because the AI is shitty but because the game designers put boobs on them.

katz
12 years ago

Ugh, I hated the paladin the second I met him. Definitely annoying that he’s the love interest.

Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
12 years ago

I love the hate that the geek community gets from certain holier than thou feminists. These guys just haven’t had as much success with the wimmin. The lack of empathy is astounding, bordering on psychopathic, in my opinion. There are female equivalents- look at the creepy Twilight girls, mostly fat, who see Edward as the standard for all men. Look at the tweenage chicks and their flavor of the month- Bieber, Archuleta, etc. What if a bunch of grown men were hanging over the fence waving their arms and screaming their heads off as, I don’t know, Angelina Jolie walked by? That’s misandry in action.

katz
12 years ago

So I take it you’ve given up on the whole “don’t be a dick” thing? Bummer. But I called it.

Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
12 years ago

STOP IT! All I’m doing is disagreeing with an earlier comment that I found snide and mean! This is NOT BEING A DICK!

Shadow
Shadow
12 years ago

Jesus fuck dude, there’s a whole world out there!! Why do you find yourself back here time after time?

zhinxy
12 years ago

At this point, continuing not to stick your flounce IS being a dick, dude.

Sniper
Sniper
12 years ago

There are female equivalents- look at the creepy Twilight girls, mostly fat, who see Edward as the standard for all men.

As a fat woman I trust I’m not alone in telling you to go fuck yourself, fuck your hat, fuck the horse you rode in on, and fuck anyone who thinks like you.

ersatzmoons
ersatzmoons
12 years ago

darksidecat, you mentioned it first, but there are a lot of guys I’ve gotten into arguments with over sword weight.

As a gal who studies Historical European Martial Arts it is really surprising how many folks think that Medieval swords would weight any where from 12 to 50 pounds. I’m not sure where these thoughts came into fruition, maybe old Victorian ideas, Hollywood and or D&D, but the heaviest European sword on record was the sword of Pier Gerlofs Donia, which is on display at the Fries Museum in Leeuwarden. It weighs 14.5 pounds and measures approximately 7 feet tall.

7 feet tall!
Although most swords, using Ewart Oakeshott’s research as reference, are 1-5 pounds, the 5 pounders being more sparse.

This is all European information, but, while I’m not too familiar with Eastern Martial Arts, fellow comrades in the study who follow both also complain about misconceptions about sword weight and (moving to the second part of I Am statement that bothers me) “swinging harder and faster.”

Strength does not equal martial power, further in sword fighting it plays less of a role. I’m not saying that sword motion should be flimsy, but solid swings need a balance in between the two. If you swing a sword, the momentum of that movement will want to follow in that direction.

In an example, performing a down ward strike from shoulder with a two handed sword. First, how you’re holding the sword is very important. George Silver refers to it as true times, basing it off Plato’s physics idea perfect version. Holding a two handed sword from your shoulder, intending to strike down, it has to be in a position of opportune placement. If your hands and sword are too far back it takes more time to strike, if they are too far forward your hands move in first before the sword. Your hands move the sword in front first, then followed by your body, adding more momentum to the movement, then your feet, giving the sword a final snap just before the point when it is almost fully extending, then draw. The sword should move at an angle, downward to the ground. (After that, instead of just standing there like a drill, it is usually advised to follow that motion to keep it moving continuously, but to my point!) Trying to swing as hard and fast as you can in those restrictions of good technique is unnecessary, because your hands, body and feet are helping you create good movement and solid strikes. Trying to swing as hard and fast out side that technique creates sloppy movement, slow recovery and easily extended targets.

TL;DR
Right, that’s a lot of ranting. The design of a sword, as an extension of the body, which should move in motion with the body, while you’re fighting, doesn’t need to be wielded by swinging as hard and fast as you can.
1.) It’s a quick way to become tired out in the first few moments of fighting.
2.) Well executed movements don’t require you to put all your energy into them, good body mechanics, technique and stamina will make you a good fighter.
3.) Moving as “hard” as you can is not always opportune. Quick cuts at extended targets don’t need to be given all your power, but are effective. A cut to a hand could handicap your opponent from even holding a sword. Ergo, you win, yay!
4.) Ignoring good technique and moving as “hard and fast” is a quick way to get killed

Stupid information, getting in the way misogyny.

Fatman
Fatman
12 years ago

It has been a long time and I modded the hell out of that game, so I cannot remember if in the out of the box version allowed for homosexual parings (i don’t think that it did), but a whole lot of the mods allowed for them. This is what led designers of later games to program homosexual parings, that people wanted them so much that they were altering the games to allow for them. This is what I think is really angering the men David quoted in the post, that people want female characters, that people want gay characters. The culture is, slowly and haltingly, becoming more feminist, and they see their position as the assumed default slipping away.

This position as the assumed default, for those of you reading that still don’t understand, is what privilege is. That there are people, and female people. Or people, and black people, Or people, and gay people. Or people, and Asian people. The idea that straight is not a sexuality, that white is not a race, or that male is not a gender, just the assumed norms that should be catered to, is what privilege comes from.

Crumbelievable
Crumbelievable
12 years ago

“These guys just haven’t had as much success with the wimmin”

Oh yes, the ol’ “If women had just been nicer to these men, they wouldn’t be such misogynists” argument. We need to that add that to the Shopworn Perennials forum thread if it isn’t there already.

It’s amazing how quickly MRAL has squandered whatever goodwill he was initially given.

JohnnyBB
JohnnyBB
12 years ago

When I play games like Fallout or Dragon Age I usually use a female avatar because I tend to think that it makes the story more unique, or interesting. Most games I’ve played in my life had a default male character, so when I have the option I usually roll female.

I think it’s interesting when certain games, like Bioware RPGs make the game experience slightly different depending on gender. Not the abilities, but I know that the social interactions are different in the Dragon Age games. Though, full disclosure, I went totally nerd-ape and beat the first one like 7 times, so maybe I pick up on things that are only minor differences.

Sniper
Sniper
12 years ago

It’s amazing how quickly MRAL has squandered whatever goodwill he was initially given.

He’s such a disappointment. I was so warmed by his confession that I assumed that he was now prepared to see women as human beings just like himself. Turns out he’s a douchenozzle, just not a genuinely sick douchenozzle. Fucking sad.

Polliwog
Polliwog
12 years ago

This is NOT BEING A DICK!

I think maybe you need a refresher course in what “not being a dick” entails.

Lesson 1: declaring that women aren’t allowed to like a particular book/movie/musician = being a dick.

Lesson 1.1 for the advanced class: it is actually possible to say that Twilight/Bieber/etc. is godawful dreck without being a dick to people who like them. For example, you can say, “Edward is pretty much the antithesis of sexy, what with being a creepy stalker and all,” without saying “women who like Twilight are probably FAT.”

Which brings us to Lesson 2: Whining about how some women dare to be fat (and suggesting that that’s relevant to anything here) = being a dick.

Then there’s Lesson 3: Going on with the stupid “wimminz” crap after people have pointed out it’s obnoxious = being a dick. And Lesson 4: Getting really upset that women have sexual desires for people who aren’t you = being a dick.

You genuinely make me sad, MRAL. I was really happy to see you trying to grow up and change, but this isn’t growing up or changing – it’s the same old “how dare women be attracted to men” BS you’ve been spouting since day 1. I guess you didn’t call them bitches this time? Are we meant to be excited about that?

(Also, speaking as a geek and a feminist, I have no problem with geeks. I have a problem with sexist idiots who happen to be geeks. When a guy is whining about the horror of having the option to play as a female character, it isn’t because he’s a geek, it’s because he’s a moron.)

red_locker
12 years ago

So, Video Games are feminist evil to these guys, too?

Good, one less asshole in the Atlus RPG fanbase. Now if you excuse me, I’m going to recruit some demons in Shin Megami Tensei: Strange Journey…which has WOMEN CHARACTERS, and DEMONS WITH BOOBS! OMG, the MISANDRY!!!!

Seriously, though, this is beyond pathethic. This line of thinking crosses the sitcom Big Embarassing Moment level.

hellkell
hellkell
12 years ago

MRAL, stop being a dick, dear.

red_locker
12 years ago

“It’s amazing how quickly MRAL has squandered whatever goodwill he was initially given.”

Seriously. What’s worse is that he’s young.

Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
12 years ago

No, I was not putting the onus on women, that’s MORE misrepresentation, isn’t that against the comment policy? I was saying they haven’t had much success with women, because of one reason or the other and that’s ALL I meant. I think I can be sympathetic to that without being a raging evil twisted vile misogynist who thinks women need to service men’s needs at all times. Anyway, as a result (I’m talking about the video untitled posted, if that wasn’t clear) they come off as a bit naive and idiotic. And I was comparing it to the Twilight fangirls, etc., many of whom ARE (I know, because I’ve seen it) very naive about males, or romance, or whatever, and think young guys are all basically Edward with variations. Not just in looks, but creepy stalkerish behavior and all that. I’d think feminists would agree with me that’s not a good thing. Unless you actually do think men all behave like sparkly vampyres.

Kyrie
Kyrie
12 years ago

MRAL, you keep asking for kindness and not to be seen as a troll but you still haven’t manage to get rid of the “wimmin” “wymmin”, etc. What’s wrong with you?

Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
12 years ago

I do apologize for the fat comment, that slipped through my mental filter and I didn’t catch it. It doesn’t matter whether or not they’re fat, of course. The point is, well, read the above post for the point.