Over on Reddit, DoktorTeufel has a problem: he likes the ladies, but he doesn’t like the feminists. Unfortunately, some ladies are also feminists! And therein lies the danger. Naturally, he turns to the fellas in the Men’s Rights subreddit for help.
I’m just going to come out and say it: I will never knowingly enter into a romantic relationship with a feminist. I do have some female relatives and acquaintances who are feminists … and it’s not like they all wear signs that proclaim I’M A FEMINIST. (Some do.)
Aside from obvious telltales (feminist bumper stickers, etc.) or outright asking them “Are you a feminist?”, what are some discreet ways to ferret out a woman’s views on gender activism without creating an awkward situation? Feminism is a minefield topic, and I certainly wouldn’t broach the subject directly with a woman I’ve just started dating.
Naturally, this being the Men’s Rights subreddit, he received much helpful advice. Celda broke it down for him:
You don’t really care whether she identifies as a feminist or not – you care what her views are.
For instance, does she feel women have the right to force men into parental obligations against their will?
Does she feel women are oppressed in Western society?
Does she think that women make less money than men for the same work?
If yes to these questions or similar, then you probably want to avoid her.
Exactly. Always avoid those with a basic grasp on reality. They’re the worst!
Naive1000 suggested looking for more subtle clues.
Ask their thoughts on “benevolent sexism” if they know what your talking about you likely have a feminist. Just to make sure go into male privilege, it’s the feminists’ most popular talking point. Let her talk about it then you can see what she’s really like. But, there are some women who call themselves feminists, but are really egalitarian: they just don’t know the term.
Memymineown also suggests a subtle approach, and holds out hope that some of the younger feminist girls can be won back to the path of righteousness:
Bring Men’s Rights issues into the conversation subtly. I was talking with my family about Justin Beiber and brought up the paternity charge and no rape charges filed against the woman.
That led into a discussion about how women aren’t punished for rape.
Just do things like that.
But you shouldn’t exclude all feminists. I would say that the vast majority are just girls(I do use that word on purpose) who have been lied to. Once you show them the real facts they will probably come around.
ThePigman, by contrast, urges DoktorTeufel to go for the jugular:
Why do you need to be discrete about it? Just ask her. If she is a member of the cult she will start screaming about the patriarchy, then her head will explode.
It’s true. Pretty much every conversation involving feminists quickly devolves into screaming about patriarchy. Heck, a feminist friend and I once screamed about patriarchy for five hours straight. We probably could have gone longer, but the manager at Applebee’s, evidently not a feminist, threw us out. Sometimes I start screaming about patriarchy when no one else is around, just to keep in practice.
Conversations with feminists pretty much all go like the conversation in the video below, only instead of a cat you need to picture a feminist, and instead of the word “no,” the word “patriarchy.” You can see how annoying that might get, and not just to Hitler.
Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, NWO! Have a lovely evening being grumpy alone!
PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATRIIIIIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAARCHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!
I don’t like it.
*explode.
NWO hasn’t gone after Zhinxy for her abuse….
He only does it if he’s rly angry at you, or angry in general and wants to hurt somebody b/c he knows he’s losing it : It’s like a bluff… he’s hoping we don’t realize how upset he is, and he makes us leave in tears.
AHAHHAHAAHA he’s gone is he xD
That’s quite early… even for him xD
And thus NWO goes to stare at the walls and reorganize his laundry on his suitcase.
What a pathetic person.
He’ll be back.
CassandraSays | January 5, 2012 at 8:06 pm
I am deathy afraid of cats. Please do not post any adorably kitty videos or I shall curl up into the fetal position and cry.
(And then men will give me money)
Plz oh plz don’t throw me into the briar patch! xD
(you basically got why NWO doesn’t hurt me xD )
Translation:
Wah wah WAHHHH….feminism changed things so I don’t get a wife to clean up after me and my children for free anymore. It made women recognize that they too could actually have a career and get paid actual money for it. Poor me I’m SO OPPRESSED, it’s not as bad as adult wives demeaning themselves and asking for an allowance from their husbands waaaaaahhhhhh
By the way everyone, that was about 6 hours NWO was logged on, on a Thursday.
For next time he claims he works 28 hours a day, 63 days a week.
Translation: Ami 14 NWO 0
Or how many times it’s been XD
Have fun punching your walls in impotent rage, poopsie!
I think it’s funny that NWO thinks that Social Security is a miserable failure rather than the most successful anti-poverty program in history, which it is. Certainly it’s not perfect, and it’s facing the same demographic pressures that face pension systems the world over, but it terms of it’s mission–reducing abject poverty among the elderly and disabled–it’s really been wildly successful.
Only women are privileged enough to have 7 days in their week and ONLY 24 hours in a day Holly.
Even TIME and CHRONOLOGY are against NWO. xD
I still think NWO lives on Venus and that explains his super long days xD
Neways I’m going off to get stuff and celebrate my new jobbings! 😀
It’s interesting, also, that as more and more parents are dual-income households, grandparents are increasingly tapped to provide the unpaid labor of raising a child. They’re certainly available now more than ever – the average length of unemployment for a Baby Boomer in 2011 was 55 weeks, about three times the length of someone in their 30s. Right now, there’s a stigma against the over-50 set in the labor market, so our society is adjusting to handle that. More and more Boomers, forced into early retirement by dint of the recession, are turning into unpaid child-care workers.
In the 50s and 60s, mothers were expected to provide the unpaid labor of child-rearing. Now, grandmothers and grandfathers are increasingly expected to take on that role. If a grandparent raises a basically good and decent kid who goes on to be a productive member of society (like mine did, twice), should we just dismiss their efforts as nothing?
It’s still hilarious to me that he completely dropped the subject of child care, and refused to address anyone who brought it up. Does he think no one notices this shit?
captainbathrobe | January 5, 2012 at 8:11 pm
I think it’s funny that NWO thinks that Social Security is a miserable failure rather than the most successful anti-poverty program in history, which it is. Certainly it’s not perfect, and it’s facing the same demographic pressures that face pension systems the world over, but it terms of it’s mission–reducing abject poverty among the elderly and disabled–it’s really been wildly successful.
It’s odd that NWO keeps saying how he’s in abject poverty but then says he doesn’t benefit from these things, and that without them he would rise to the top and destroy all xD
It’s still hilarious to me that he completely dropped the subject of child care, and refused to address anyone who brought it up. Does he think no one notices this shit?
He thinks he’s a lot better at this than he is xD
@NWO
Also wives and motherhood has to do with women moreso than men. Wives and Mothers are women.
I don’t hate either of those things. I just hate the fact that in the past women weren’t given much of a choice besides them though. I also hate that even today there are men who think they have the right to force those things onto women despite the fact that tons of women tell them repeatedly they don’t want them, or at least don’t want to throw away their career aspirations for them.
I’ve been gone for a while, I think NWO forgot just how annoying I am to him. xD I’m that little thing buzzing in his ear…. it slowly drives him mad XD
NWO: You know that Original Constitution didn’t have freedom of speech, the press, keep and bear arms, protection from unlawful search and seizure, against self-incrimination, rights not name reserved to the people, or the states.
So we can chuck those too.
Or, you know, that whole thing the guys who wrote it did to make it possible to amend it… that’s in there too, and if people chose to use it… well that’s in the rules in the “Original Constitution”.
When the Feminist Conspiracy™ invents Time Travel, I know which historical document I’m going back to alter first…
in the future NWO will reference the original constitution and it will say simply:
XD
Oh and speaking of child-rearing…
Babysitters get paid…you know with actual money. Daycare workers get paid too. Preschool teachers as well. Why should mothers do it for free?
@Ami
you got a new job? congrats! 😀