Uh oh! I just discovered this, currently the top story over on the Men’s Rights subreddit:
Yes, my sisters (and honorary mangina man-sisters), Russell Brand has dealt a severe blow to Operation Alimony, which (as you well know, at least if you’ve been attending the meetings) is our dastardly Feminazi plot to destroy the patriarchy by getting pretty ladies to marry and divorce rich dudes and take all their money.
You may remember our wild revelry when we heard that comrade-ess Heather Mills had walked off (no jokes please) with £24.3 million of Paul McCartney’s man money. And the joyful tears we shed when we heard that Mel Gibson’s ex-wife had (reportedly) scored a cool $425 million in her divorce settlement.
But today, we shed only the bitterest of tears. We have not only been thwarted, but we’ve also been exposed! Damn those Men’s Rights Redditors and their evil allies at the Daily Mail!
The comments in the r/mensrights thread show that they understand our evil plans all too well. How can we respond to Aetheralloy’s withering critique?
Feminists see the absurdity of their own pushed polices?
LOL no. No they won’t. I’d sooner expect scientologists to ask their psychiatrist if they are in a cult.
But ladies! Do not despair! Russell Brand may have set back our efforts, but he, and his Reddit allies, shall not defeat us!
Ladies, you know what to do. Get yourself all prettied up, hit the town, and snag yourself some rich dudes! Let’s see how many of these guys we can have married off by the end of the year.
Marrying (and divorcing) rich dudes: it’s the feminist way!
I had a
Sorry Dracula! 🙂 You are very right, twice 🙂
It’s cool. Thanks.
Getting properly fitted – you could try asking your local cancer service who fits for mastectomies, they are all trained in fitting.
Geez, Magpie’s a busybody today, ay?
They need to start enforcing the no belt with a suit (much less waistcoat) rule.
Not only is it proper(!), it also gives us men a bit of a pain. Suspenders aren’t uncomfortable, but they do make going to the bathroom unnecessarily difficult (to say nothing of suspenders and a cummerbund).
Sizes differ considerably between the US/UK and elsewhere – according to this site, my bra is equivalent to a 32B in US sizes (in Australia I’m a 10B; the European size would be 70C or 85C apparently). I can find any style more or less off the shelf, whereas my girlfriend has to go into the E sizes, which means the bras are about five times the price, and she’s lucky if there are as many as two styles of bra in the shop. (We often joke that it’d be totally fine if we traded about one cup size up or down.)
Maybe I’m weird but I actually hate being braless if I’m walking around. It’s the bouncing issue – I tend to walk fast, and it feels weird. I also actively prefer underwires to wire-free bras. Racerback bras can actually be awesome for a bigger chest. (I’d also vote for corsets, but I know that nobody believes me that they can be fairly comfortable if they fit well – none of the weight of your boobs is on your shoulders.)
Sizing does get even weirder if you travel. Last time I was in Asia I discovered that in Japanese sizes I’m an F cup – they’re off by one size at the higher end, but not at the lower end, somehow, which is particularly mystifying.
Seconding corsets. Although the last time I wore one the bones under each cup ended up resting on my hip bones, which made for a very weird effect – my boobs rose up left / right / left / right with each step!
Forward march!
Also, ow?
@Cassandra: I don’t like the bouncing either.
When I model for the art classes there tend to be a number of mirrors in the room as well, so I get the full view of my chest when I’m changing poses…the only thing I dislike more than the sensation is the visual.
Cassandrasays, – No, me too. I find wired up crazy contraption bras give me the most comfort.
As for corsets, I’m always hearing great things, but It will be a while before I can afford one to find out!
My Wonder Woman corset was actually fairly comfortable, provided it was tied securely enough that it didn’t slide down and press on my hips. It has about 22 bones in it, though, so bending is rather difficult.
Hey, is talking in long, boring detail about bras the way to banish MRAL when he’s being annoying?
The other downfall of the Wondie corset is that I removed the front opening from the pattern so that it greater resembled the comic costume…which makes lacing up the back or removing the corset impossible without help.
BTW, did you-know-who ever pass the moderation challenge?
@Magpie: He decided it was beneath him and flounced. For now, anyway.
Hey, is talking in long, boring detail about bras the way to banish MRAL when he’s being annoying?
lol i just hope it takes away some of the power boobs seem to have over guys that think like that. you can love boobs, but don’t assume they have a positive effect on the woman’s life or that everyone is nice to the woman cause of something like that. same goes for anything physical. MRA’s are an extreme example i think it’s kinda common for men to think this way on some level though.
Cool! our host found his fatal weakness 🙂 He used to freak me out a bit.
…and also women too i guess or else plastic surgery wouldn’t be as big of an industry :-/ “my problems will go away if i change x about my appearance…”
Not that I don’t enjoy using my boobs for recreational purposes sometimes, but still, I’m all for demystifying them for the guys who’re all OMG LOOK TITS, THIS IS ALL I HAVE NOTICED ABOUT KATY PERRY.
Now the guys who know how to appreciate them when it’s playtime and how to be blase about them when it’s not, those are the ones I really adore.
So yeah, anyway, bralessness looking professional can’t come soon enough, but hey, remember, Men have to COMB THEIR HAIR and iron stuff, so a bunch of uncomfortable underwear requirements mean nothing. :p
If sports bras became acceptably professional, I would quite literally weep with joy. On top of having irritatingly, disproportionately large boobs (others are giving their sizes without anyone saying, “HA HA HA THAT ISN’T EVEN A REAL THING,” so I suppose I can safely say that I’m a 32G), I also have ludicrously tender boobs – which means that I manage simultaneously to be unable to go braless comfortably and unable to wear anything with an underwire comfortably. I buy underwire bras for work, then rip them off and change into sports bras the moment I get home because I hurt so badly by the end of the day, but big, fat boobs in a sports bra are “unprofessional” (and also guarantee that no nice-looking clothes will fit at all, since they end up in the “wrong” place on my torso). Being in pain all the time is far more “professional” of me! Clearly!
Sigh.
(Did I mention that I hate my boobs? Because I really, really do.)
It’s so weird and cool how individual this stuff is. I find the compression effect of sports bras horribly uncomfortable and hate wearing them, but underwires don’t bug me at all. The non-wired but not really sports bra kinds with the tight, thick elastic on the band I detest.
Huh, that was a hella informative derail. I thank you all profoundly. It’s funny to think that I put so little thought about the boobs that I love so much loll
@Polliwog: Do you have insurance? It sounds like the sort of pain you’re describing may qualify you for a reduction. Of course, you’ve probably considered that before; I just thought I’d ask.
I really feel for you guys :-/. I have a pair of exceptionally mundane 32Cs and even I have trouble finding anything in stores. Most places seem to have 32 As and Bs, and then 34 up they’ll have Bs Cs and Ds, sometimes DDs. Not much selection!
It was only this last year that I found a place where I could buy bras in my size that weren’t just utilitarian t-shirt bras, but were actually sexy! I love love love sexy lingerie and so I was always so frustrated that I couldn’t find any nice bras.
@Polliwog: Do you have insurance? It sounds like the sort of pain you’re describing may qualify you for a reduction. Of course, you’ve probably considered that before; I just thought I’d ask.
I’ve checked. My insurance doesn’t cover it. Also, I’m severely terrified of surgery, so that’s probably a no-go.
I’m mostly just hoping that eventually I can lose enough weight that my boobs will have to shrink a bit. They were always large and oversensitive, but back when I was super-skinny, they were more in the D range, and managed to be perky enough on their own that underwires didn’t dig in quite so much. (The hypersensitivity seems to be largely a hormone thing, rather than a size thing – birth control has, in the past, either made it better or much, much worse. My last three attempts at finding the right version of the pill all fell into the latter category, unfortunately, but maybe someday I’ll figure out an answer there, too. I can hope, at least.)