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Homeless girls: A frugal alternative to pricey prostitutes!

NOTE: The title of this post is sarcastic. If you found this post through a Google search because you’re actually looking for tips on how to exploit desperate young women, you’re a piece of shit, and this post is not for you. Go away, and go fuck yourself.

Fellas! Want sex, but don’t have the money to shell out on prostitutes? Hate the time and effort it takes to talk a non-professional sex-having women into having sex with you? A recent post by Advocatus Diaboli on the always delightful In Mala Fide offered an elegant solution for horny but frugal men. In a post titled Pooning on a Tight Budget, AD explained the technique that has worked for him:

Getting poor, but good-looking, young girls (18-23) to have sex with [you] in return for some timely financial help.

Turns out that women who are poor and desperate can be exploited for your own sexy purposes!

Of course, it’s not always quite as easy as it might seem.

I should be upfront that getting amateur women to have sex for money can be tricky as most of them believe that they are not whores. Moreover, poor young women often have “boyfriends” and white knight orbiters. So I created a set of filters and rules to screen out the most problematic types.

According to AD, all you have to do is to:

Avoid all girls who have obvious and serious drug and mental health issues or have lived on the street for over 6 weeks at a stretch.

Happily for you, that still leaves lots of girls ripe for the picking! AD suggests you focus your attention on:

Freshly homeless young girls, especially those who hangout in mixed groups.

The safest ones are those who are into pot, drumming, dreadlocks et cetera. You can find them in many larger cities in the spring and summer. While I would never trust them with any significant amount of money, many are reasonably decent human beings.

You might not think you’d have much in common to talk about with these women – what with them being “reasonably decent human beings” and you being a “completely reprehensible pile of shit” – but you’d be surprised.

Strike up a conversation with them, engage them and see where it leads. But you must make it plainly obvious that you are interested in them sexually, but that all favors require reciprocation. Once you get to know them, a decent round of drinks, snacks, money for pot, a small necessary item of clothing, decent dinner with booze will almost guarantee you a good lay (or at least a couple of BJs).

And if you crunch the numbers you’ll see it’s really quite a frugal solution.

Your initial financial hit for hanging out with them is very small, and once they are sleeping with you.. it will often work to about $30-60 (cash equivalent or cash) per session. You may also get freebies..

But girls don’t necessarily have to be literally homeless to be desperate enough to sleep with you for money. Nope! You may also find great cost-savings from targeting:

Girls who are not homeless, but are just hanging on.

How do you find these lovely ladies? Keep an eye out for women working really shitty jobs that don’t pay shit! You’ll find them conveniently located

in smaller retail stores or businesses that pay minimum wage with no tips. Build a rapport and be fairly upfront about your interest, but do not come across as desperate. Go to her workplace and talk to her when you are in that area, but do not stalk her.

Yep, it turns out that even desperate women can be creeped out. So play it cool! Stalking’s for fools!

There’s another possible hurdle: other dudes.

Such women often have “boyfriends,” however, they are often just as poor or poorer than her. You can get pussy as long as you are firm about the need for reciprocation. This category of girls might be more willing to give BJs than having ‘real sex.’ But do you really care?

Just remember to keep to your budget!

Restrict your help to less than $200 at any one time AND only after she has put out a couple of times.

And then there’s AD’s favorite category of desperate women:

Girls who are poor, but not homeless and have no “boyfriends” + have moved to the city within the last eight weeks.

You have hit the jackpot! 

Just don’t get carried away. Remember: you’re in charge, and she should know it!

Remember these girls can become de facto GFs, but do not restrict yourself to one. While you do not have to rub it in their faces, they should know that you are always looking around for a better deal. But treat them a bit better than type 1 and 2, they do give more per dollar spent on them.

Your accountant will be so, so proud of you!

Just remember:

They will play by your rules as long as they are not too dehumanizing, and they are often cheaper than professional whores.

Now that’s a motto to live by!

Amazingly, not all of the readers of In Mala Fide appreciated AD’s little treatise.

Simon invoked the c-word, before tossing in some racism:

Mate you are one deadset sad cunt. It’s no surprise to know you’re Indian.

Cathater broke out the other c-word:

Pretty damn creepy. You sound like you have no soul. Actually, you might be the first member of a new species: the perfectly rational, purely selfish utility-maximizing agent (Homo Economicus) that Austrian economists and Randroids have always droned on and on about.

Yes, I was as surprised as you are to read an actually reasonable critique of the post on In Mala Fide.

Don’t worry, though, the rest of the comments mostly lived up to the foul standards of the blog.

Ryu worried about the old slippery slope. If you start by suggesting that PUAs target homeless women, the next thing you know they’ll advocate sex with children! And then down the slippery slope you’ll slide:

This is the direction that PU takes one in. I’m surprised that there haven’t been any PUAs who say that during a dry spell we should go to gay bars and pick up men. Just to keep your dick wet, you know.

Savrola returned to the theme of race:

There’s a problem WNs have yet to deal with. Well off second-generation foreigners like AD taking advantage of your impoverished women of older native stock, after they’ve taken your jobs.

Can’t keep ‘em here, can’t send ‘em back.

What to do?

Blog proprietor Ferdinand Bardamu waded in to take a shot at all the “white knights” sticking up for the gals.

ROFLMAO at all these white knights. …

If you want to blame someone, blame the morally debased white women who would rather blow a stranger for $200 then work honestly (pull yourself up by your bootstraps, slob! nobody owes you anything!).

We’re living in Soviet Amerika (and Soviet Kanada). All of your daughters are whores or will become whores, soon as the price tag gets high enough.

Meanwhile, Stoner With a Boner, who sometimes graces the comments section here with his always trenchant wisdom, took a stand on behalf of the real victims here: dudes paying their own hard-earned money to icky ladies for sex.

Personally, I find the idea of clocking more hours at a job I hate just to hand $200 to a prostitute who would probably leave me dying in the street rather than help degrading.

Men, the forgotten victims once again.

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CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

It’s a ghost kitty!

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

SHIT. I did again. I am so sorry.

kittehserf
11 years ago

It’s the catvatar hivemind, that’s what it is!

kittehserf
11 years ago

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee Alice’s kitty really is a ghost kitty!

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

You know, there’s a certain stage of life at which “I’m going to tell your mom” is no longer the solution to someone’s problems.

Alice Sanguinaria
11 years ago

kittehs – I’m GHOST KITTY FROM THE BEYOND! I hath come to bless the cat-lovers and the animal lovers alike! I promise that I won’t eat string or scratch up your furniture—really!

hellkell – It’s okay. I mistyped your name too many times, and didn’t notice until someone else pointed it out. 😛

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

I’m guessing the family is not such a great support system if she’s living in a seedy motel. Yet JC seems rather surprised that mom hasn’t snapped to and updated him.

kittehserf
11 years ago

Alice is the Archangel, the Messenger of Ceiling Cat!

::genuflects::

Alice Sanguinaria
11 years ago

neuroticbeagle – 😀 Have a free tummy rub blessing!

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago
Alice Sanguinaria
11 years ago

Dang it. If I were any good at actual Photoshopping, I’d ‘shop a halo just for the LULZ.

kittehserf
11 years ago

This has nothing to do with anything but it’s another reason “you’ll end up alone with cats” isn’t a threat:

http://torontopubliclibrary.typepad.com/.a/6a00e5509ea6a188340162fea93d47970d-320wi

kittehserf
11 years ago

You want me to do a halo for your gravatar, Alice?

Alice Sanguinaria
11 years ago

kittehs – Sure, go ahead.

kittehserf
11 years ago
Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Neuroticbeagle — do you have a source for that last one?

Alice Sanguinaria
11 years ago

kittehs – MEOW! I AM ARCHANGEL CAT!

neuroticbeagle
11 years ago

@Argenti no. sorry. 🙁

Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Aw, damn. Oh well, I have a beaver and some otters to add to the cute queue. And a kitty banhammer!

cloudiah
11 years ago

Well, that was weird.

Greetings from 4chan
Greetings from 4chan
10 years ago

there r no homeless where i live. just 10k of ppl live here, is not that much.

Nuff said.

returning to the fap cave