NOTE: The title of this post is sarcastic. If you found this post through a Google search because you’re actually looking for tips on how to exploit desperate young women, you’re a piece of shit, and this post is not for you. Go away, and go fuck yourself.
Fellas! Want sex, but don’t have the money to shell out on prostitutes? Hate the time and effort it takes to talk a non-professional sex-having women into having sex with you? A recent post by Advocatus Diaboli on the always delightful In Mala Fide offered an elegant solution for horny but frugal men. In a post titled Pooning on a Tight Budget, AD explained the technique that has worked for him:
Getting poor, but good-looking, young girls (18-23) to have sex with [you] in return for some timely financial help.
Turns out that women who are poor and desperate can be exploited for your own sexy purposes!
Of course, it’s not always quite as easy as it might seem.
I should be upfront that getting amateur women to have sex for money can be tricky as most of them believe that they are not whores. Moreover, poor young women often have “boyfriends” and white knight orbiters. So I created a set of filters and rules to screen out the most problematic types.
According to AD, all you have to do is to:
Avoid all girls who have obvious and serious drug and mental health issues or have lived on the street for over 6 weeks at a stretch.
Happily for you, that still leaves lots of girls ripe for the picking! AD suggests you focus your attention on:
Freshly homeless young girls, especially those who hangout in mixed groups.
The safest ones are those who are into pot, drumming, dreadlocks et cetera. You can find them in many larger cities in the spring and summer. While I would never trust them with any significant amount of money, many are reasonably decent human beings.
You might not think you’d have much in common to talk about with these women – what with them being “reasonably decent human beings” and you being a “completely reprehensible pile of shit” – but you’d be surprised.
Strike up a conversation with them, engage them and see where it leads. But you must make it plainly obvious that you are interested in them sexually, but that all favors require reciprocation. Once you get to know them, a decent round of drinks, snacks, money for pot, a small necessary item of clothing, decent dinner with booze will almost guarantee you a good lay (or at least a couple of BJs).
And if you crunch the numbers you’ll see it’s really quite a frugal solution.
Your initial financial hit for hanging out with them is very small, and once they are sleeping with you.. it will often work to about $30-60 (cash equivalent or cash) per session. You may also get freebies..
But girls don’t necessarily have to be literally homeless to be desperate enough to sleep with you for money. Nope! You may also find great cost-savings from targeting:
Girls who are not homeless, but are just hanging on.
How do you find these lovely ladies? Keep an eye out for women working really shitty jobs that don’t pay shit! You’ll find them conveniently located
in smaller retail stores or businesses that pay minimum wage with no tips. Build a rapport and be fairly upfront about your interest, but do not come across as desperate. Go to her workplace and talk to her when you are in that area, but do not stalk her.
Yep, it turns out that even desperate women can be creeped out. So play it cool! Stalking’s for fools!
There’s another possible hurdle: other dudes.
Such women often have “boyfriends,” however, they are often just as poor or poorer than her. You can get pussy as long as you are firm about the need for reciprocation. This category of girls might be more willing to give BJs than having ‘real sex.’ But do you really care?
Just remember to keep to your budget!
Restrict your help to less than $200 at any one time AND only after she has put out a couple of times.
And then there’s AD’s favorite category of desperate women:
Girls who are poor, but not homeless and have no “boyfriends” + have moved to the city within the last eight weeks.
You have hit the jackpot!
Just don’t get carried away. Remember: you’re in charge, and she should know it!
Remember these girls can become de facto GFs, but do not restrict yourself to one. While you do not have to rub it in their faces, they should know that you are always looking around for a better deal. But treat them a bit better than type 1 and 2, they do give more per dollar spent on them.
Your accountant will be so, so proud of you!
Just remember:
They will play by your rules as long as they are not too dehumanizing, and they are often cheaper than professional whores.
Now that’s a motto to live by!
Amazingly, not all of the readers of In Mala Fide appreciated AD’s little treatise.
Simon invoked the c-word, before tossing in some racism:
Mate you are one deadset sad cunt. It’s no surprise to know you’re Indian.
Cathater broke out the other c-word:
Pretty damn creepy. You sound like you have no soul. Actually, you might be the first member of a new species: the perfectly rational, purely selfish utility-maximizing agent (Homo Economicus) that Austrian economists and Randroids have always droned on and on about.
Yes, I was as surprised as you are to read an actually reasonable critique of the post on In Mala Fide.
Don’t worry, though, the rest of the comments mostly lived up to the foul standards of the blog.
Ryu worried about the old slippery slope. If you start by suggesting that PUAs target homeless women, the next thing you know they’ll advocate sex with children! And then down the slippery slope you’ll slide:
This is the direction that PU takes one in. I’m surprised that there haven’t been any PUAs who say that during a dry spell we should go to gay bars and pick up men. Just to keep your dick wet, you know.
Savrola returned to the theme of race:
There’s a problem WNs have yet to deal with. Well off second-generation foreigners like AD taking advantage of your impoverished women of older native stock, after they’ve taken your jobs.
Can’t keep ‘em here, can’t send ‘em back.
What to do?
Blog proprietor Ferdinand Bardamu waded in to take a shot at all the “white knights” sticking up for the gals.
ROFLMAO at all these white knights. …
If you want to blame someone, blame the morally debased white women who would rather blow a stranger for $200 then work honestly (pull yourself up by your bootstraps, slob! nobody owes you anything!).
We’re living in Soviet Amerika (and Soviet Kanada). All of your daughters are whores or will become whores, soon as the price tag gets high enough.
Meanwhile, Stoner With a Boner, who sometimes graces the comments section here with his always trenchant wisdom, took a stand on behalf of the real victims here: dudes paying their own hard-earned money to icky ladies for sex.
Personally, I find the idea of clocking more hours at a job I hate just to hand $200 to a prostitute who would probably leave me dying in the street rather than help degrading.
Men, the forgotten victims once again.
This post contains:
Can you desire just the body? I seek (or sought, rather, once upon a time) EVERYTHING, heart, mind, soul, the complete package.
Please do, that was sincerely amusing. There’s a special joy from self-deprecatory humor.
No acrostics this time ’cause it’s late.
He says he’s self-deprecatory,
But that’s not the entire story.
He diddles his brain;
His words form a stain:
I’d call that mentally masturbatory
It was only a matter of time until I got the “you were exploiting him!” out of a troll, huh? With a nice dose of “16-year-old girls shouldn’t be illegal, because I’m attracted to them.”
Funny thing is, I ran away a few times, and on the other ones I didn’t have to fuck anyone. People let me stay with them just because I was a friend. (Or because I helped them with their home business and nannied their kid, which satisfies the “no free rides!!!” demand but is dreadfully lacking in titillation.) Apparently among decent human beings there is such a thing as a free lunch. It must break your little heart.
Whatever, quick question, when youi observe ads of half-naked or completely naked women, or watch porn and etc… are you saying that you are actually attracted because of her mind and soul? How do you know what those are if you don’t know the said woman?
If you however you are still attracted than yes, one can be attracted to some other person with complete disregard for their mind, heart and soul.
In regards to friggid, honey, it’s not them, it’s you. Nobody is attracted to a person who loves to imply that you are subjuman, because of your gender/race/whatever and that somebody esle should tell them what to do. Or you know, most people, I am sure there are people like that out there, but I hope they are minority.
P.S. I am talking about people outside of the BDSM community and not implying that people in those communities are wrong in any way, I hope it is clear.
Holly, let me thank you again for being brave enough to share your story with us in a space where assholes can say stuff like that to you.
Whatever, thanks for outing yourself as despicable. I had you logged under annoying, my mistake.
Om Nom Nom: I didn’t disrespect Hobbes anywhere, I just said trolls quoted him.
You guys really like putting words in other peoples’ mouths, don’cha?
Exactly. There are a lot of good hearted people in the world who help other people in need without any expectations of receiving something in return. Real charity doesn’t have strings attached. I don’t like hearing cynics say that everyone is on their own. It makes me wonder if they know what it’s like to be in a hard spot. Someday they might need a free lunch, too.
My relatives, friends, acquaintances, and even strangers have given my family a lot of help in various forms since the tornado. Nobody has demanded anything in return for the help either, unless you count the help we got from insurance. As soon as we moved back into our house, volunteers started showing up at our door all the time to offer us water, meals, toiletries, toys, and clothing. Volunteers removed dead trees and bushes, picked up debris from our yard, and have given free counseling to my kids. My insurance paid for contractors and ServePro to do the big jobs, but volunteers helped us do the rest. I don’t know what we would have done without them either.
Thousands of people have come from all over the country to come help people they don’t know in Joplin. They sleep on the floor in churches, worked hard in 100 degree heat, and never accepted a dime from anyone for their work. Whatever, how would you explain these people?
@ Kendra, the Bionic Mommy:
“Whatever, how would you explain these people?”
Manginas and white knights madam, manginas and white knights!! Every blasted one of them!
/sarcasm
It’s really upsetting that “Don’t exploit people” get’s such a reaction out of some people. Help people, or don’t, but don’t use their desperation to get something out of them.
But, but, DARWIN! I’m hardwired to take advantage of those less fortunate than me! Plus, free market and personal responsibility! Did I mention Darwin? Because of him I’m entitled to all the pussy I can stand…
Ok, sarcasm as been turned off temporarily threw a massive internal effort:
I often say that it takes just as long to be nice to someone as it does to be rude. But in this sick case it is actually a heck of a lot quicker to do the right thing than to be a raging asshole. (And by “right’, I mean don’t take advantage… either do nothing (our culture’s default) or even go the extra millimeter spot them some change.)
I’ve never been homeless myself, something I attribute to luck and ….errr, well luck really. Lucky to be born white cis-male, and into a large family that didn’t abuse me and valued education. A family could help me out in those early days, especially when I had some serious health issues right out of college. And just luck luck — finding my first job just as I was running out of money or being able to get out of a bad marriage with a minimal of fuss.
But, back in my college days (early 90’s), I befriended several homeless people in my neighborhood. I got to talk to them while waiting for the bus, or while I dug around for what small amounts of change I had…a couple I got to know a bit out their lives… an Most of them, with a couple of exceptions, were people who seemed genuinely nice but just couldn’t keep it together.
None of them seemed any more “damaged goods” than most people I later met in my professional (I’m a software developer) or personal life.
And I don’t know about all of you, but when meeting someone for the first time, I always pay attention to how they treat people “below” them on the economic scale. So if someone is rude to a waiter, or retail clerk, or… the homeless, then they clearly are not worth my time.
This guy… gee can we sue someone because their very existence is nauseating?
GAH! This line of discussion is so upsetting that my sarcasm is spontaneously turning itself back on as a defense mechanism…. I better end the post qui— DARWIN!!!! HARDWIRED!!!!
@Leni: And when did I ever say the boyfriend was “quality material” or not damaged?
@Kavette: You aren’t better than me. Quit being so smug…it makes you look arrogant.
That’s my litmus test too. And I found out much later that it was one that my wife applied to me – apparently on our second date I was unusually nice to the waiter. I don’t remember this at all, largely because being nice to waiters is my default mode, but it clearly made an impression.
Blackadder: Baldrick, have you no idea what irony is?
Baldrick: Yes, it’s like goldy and bronzy only it’s made out of iron.
Pftt. Go ahead and disrespect Hobbes. It’s not like he cares.
Let’s put it this way, Leni:
Sharing your home a homeless stranger puts you at a very high risk of being robbed….or worse. So if a homeless girl begged me to let her live at my place and promised me sex in return I would refuse. Plenty of johns end up being robbed by prostitutes and I see no reason why a homeless woman might try to do the same damn thing. There are other ways to help out the homeless that don’t involve exploiting them or putting yourself at risk of them taking advantage of your generosity.
You win one internet. Please pick up your prize out front.
this is like the platonic ideal of thoughtless pretention
It’s weird that Whatever is celebrating some man’s exploitative sexual use of another human being, but hasn’t ever saluted other men for having sex. He’s been outright dismissive of women for having sex, even when it’s with men.
Hey Whatever, I know a dude who has sex regularly. He got laid twice last night, and he didn’t even have to exploit a girl in trouble. He just had to warm up a Knorr soup packet and cuddle on the couch watching the Stargate movie. Does that story “put a smile on your face,” because “it’s nice to know that once in a while, some of us do get lucky every so often?” Are you happier, less happy, or exactly as happy for him as for the guy who took advantage of someone?
Wait wait wait. What’s all the scheming and planning by the MRA on how to score sex?? Last I heard, the mra dudes had given up their dreams of scoring sex with a woman and turned to Blow Up Dolls as their last resort. Now they’re back to sex with real humans again?
The notion that grotesquely exploiting the homeless for sexual gratification is “getting lucky” is so abhorrently alien to me that I wouldn’t know where to start when it comes to fathoming the mentality that would conceive it.
LOL, Shadow. I guess you’re right that MRA’s would call the volunteers manginas and white knights. How would they describe female volunteers, though? It probably would not register to them that women are also capable of showing compassion and being generous to strangers.
Um, that would be Nietzsche. Not Hobbes.
Picking on homeless women is fine, but not Hobbes! Dickish philosophers can’t handle it!
Nice strawman. >_>
@Kendra
Female volunteers? P’shaw. All that wimminz are good for is seduction and stealing hard-working menz money.
/sarcasm