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New form of anti-male oppression discovered: Women’s magazines in checkout lines!

Yeah, I know you've all seen this one before, but, come on! It's funny!

Over on Reddit’s Men’s Rights subreddit, cheester warns all of us dudes about an especially insidious form of anti-male oppression: the racks of women’s magazines that lurk near the checkout counters of grocery stores everywhere!

can I get some feedback on womens magazines at the grocery checkout? Every issue states “new tricks he doesn’t know in bed” and shite like that. It’s obvious porn for the gals but why is it so accepted by everyone that it has carte blanche to be within a two foot reach as I pay for my food? If a magazine for men had on the cover: “20 Ways To Make Her Squirm Like A Fish”….there would be a national outrage.

Yeah, it’s not like Men’s magazines ever run anything like that.

Church groups and womens rights would say it demoralizes women and have the publication banned or put behind censored racks in seedy smoke shops.

Yeah. It’s not like this ever happens to women’s magazines.

But the womens mags are right there as a last shop item in the flourescent lit, sterilized, family atmosphere where every mother parades her toddlers and kids right past the 3 letter word in big black block letters;SEX on the cover of every flashy colored womens mag that comes out each month.  

Not only is this oppression of men, it’s oppression of all toddlers who can read and know what the word “sex” means.

Also, feminists have never criticized women’s magazines in any way. “Ten Ways to Make Him Squirm” articles are the distilled essence of feminism! And most of them are written by the ghost of Andrea Dworkin.

NOTE:  Does this even need a “sarcasm” tag?

 

 

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Viscaria
Viscaria
12 years ago

@Hershele:

I would at least check out a bar on the sole basis of calling itself a “tavern” if there were one near me that didn’t have stratospherically priced drinks.


Yeah, me too. I admit it. Maybe they’d have wooden tankards and serve grog in them! But not real grog, because that would be disgusting. Just something they called grog. And maybe some mead!

Still, DKM’s casual use of the term as if it’s totally a thing people say is suspect.

zhinxy
zhinxy
12 years ago

Granny Weatherwax and Nanny Ogg – Evil Modern Women.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
12 years ago

Even Magrat is a bit too intimidating for Meller.

zhinxy
zhinxy
12 years ago

Nanny is super sweet and had lots of babeez, but she is manifestly unflluffy and knowledgable.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
12 years ago

I think Granny is pretty much what the feminists in his head look/act like.

Viscaria
Viscaria
12 years ago

zhinxy – didn’t he make reference in another thread to typing out his comments on a typewriter? Magically sending messages from the past is my current strongest hypothesis. Although taverns and typewriters aren’t exactly contemporaneous, to be fair. There are some kinks I need to work out.

Monsieur sans Nom
Monsieur sans Nom
12 years ago

I have repeatedly said, for instance, that violence, or the threat of violence, is not only unethical and wrong, but totally ineffective even from the abuser’s point of view! A mate or a partner terrorized or beaten into obedience is NOT going to give the responses of love, eagerness, happiness, willing and submissive compliance that a woman (or pet, for that matter) who is treated with love, gentleness, and patience will.This is so self-evident, and so much conforming with universal experience, that It should answer your objections to my alleged support (???) for such misbehavior then and there!

HURTS SO GOOD!………C’MON BAY-BAY MAKE IT HURT, SO, GOOD!!

SOMETIMES LOVE DONT FEEL LIKE IT SHOULD, YOU MAKE IT, HURT SO GOOD!

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
12 years ago

Actually Nanny reminds me a lot of my granny, which is part of why I love her so much.

Note that my Granny was born in the 1920s. Apparently women weren’t all that fluffy and submissive back then either.

VoIP
VoIP
12 years ago

use the gold-plated melitta filters

Do those make the coffee taste better, or is their main virtue that they never wear out?

VoIP
VoIP
12 years ago

zhinxy:

I miss my Moka Pot

You know, word on the street is that you can exchange money for goods and services.

zhinxy
zhinxy
12 years ago

VoiP – Hmmm, it’s so crazy it just might work!

Also, I hear the gold reduces the acidity. I’ve never had gold-filtered coffee, so don’t ask me!

Cassandrasays – There seem to be various dates for the horrible loss of women’s natural fluff! it could have happened in the 1890s, the 20’s, or possibly the Sixties. We may never know!

VoIP
VoIP
12 years ago

Viscaria:
I wonder if this is DKM’s computer?

I would like to formally put forward DKM’s use of the word “tavern” as further evidence that he is either a) sending these messages from the distant past or b) a centuries-old vampire.

Malkavian? Ventrue often have the most trouble adjusting to the material culture of the present day, and their clan weakness is that they’re bound to one “type” of prey. So you may be onto something.

VoIP
VoIP
12 years ago

On the other hand, his attempt to Dominate us just…keeps…failing.

VoIP
VoIP
12 years ago

zhinxy:

Cassandrasays – There seem to be various dates for the horrible loss of women’s natural fluff! it could have happened in the 1890s, the 20′s, or possibly the Sixties. We may never know!

I’m just going to leave this here, I have no idea why:
http://meinekatze.tumblr.com/post/13784947129

PosterformerlyknownasElizabeth
PosterformerlyknownasElizabeth
12 years ago

I think Granny is pretty much what the feminists in his head look/act like.

I truly wish to grow up to be just like Granny Weatherwax.

Viscaria
Viscaria
12 years ago

I’m also curious about gold coffee filters, actually. And French presses. My man’s serious about coffee – he roasts his own beans and everything – and this Christmas is our first gift-giving opportunity. My hipster parents tut-tutted that he doesn’t already own a French press, but the only coffee they ever drink is espresso so I don’t trust them in this matter at all.

And if I reeeeaally wanted to derail the thread, I might mention that he’d also hinted for a nice (but affordable) bottle of scotch. As far as I can tell, scotch ranges from “tastes like battery acid” to “tastes like slightly more acrid battery acid.”

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
12 years ago

I could ask my Dad about the whiskey, him being a Scot and all. In terms of the French press, I love them. They’re a lot easier to use and clean than most other methods, too.

hellkell
hellkell
12 years ago

Viscaria, get him some Talisker. If you have a big liquor store with decent prices (God, Spec’s is one of the bright spots of moving to TX), it should be in the $35-45 range. It’s delicious, and I’m not much of a scotch drinker.

Bee
Bee
12 years ago

Is a tavern an unusual thing where you guys live? They’re pretty common here. About as common as a pub, more common than an alehouse.

I live in 2011, in case you’re wondering.

Viscaria
Viscaria
12 years ago

CassandraSays and hellkell: thank you!! 😀 the whiskey will probably be more expensive here because of our high taxes on alcohol, but that’s quite a bit less than I was planning to spend anyway. I promise to stop using Manboobz to crowdsource gift ideas now.

@Bee: No kidding! I’m always surprised by regional differences in how a common language is used. I’m almost positive there aren’t any taverns in my city, just bars and pubs and clubs; and at one point we had the most drinking establishments per capita for a Canadian city (sort of a dubious honour).

Need to know
12 years ago

@ Viscaria; Dalwhinnie 15 year old single malt is what we break out around here for special occasions. Glenfiddich and Aberlour are also pretty tasty.

The only tavern I ever knew anything about other than to drive past it was a biker bar. I know that’s not what DKM means but the image of him trying to sass one of the women I knew there makes me smile.

As for what Granny Weatherwax and Nanny Ogg would make of him, my money is on the answer being a frog.

Pecunium
12 years ago

Hershele: TimeOut New York keeps a list of bars with decent prices. There are a few I keep meaning to check out, because they are said to have good Manhattans.

Viscaria: Real Grog (1 part dark rum [I commend Pusser’s Blue Label] 1 part lime juice, 4 parts water), is tasty.

Pecunium
12 years ago

Viscaria: Gold Filters are beneficial in that one need not throw them away. The gold keeps the acids in the coffee from eating the mesh. It doesn’t, so far as I can tell, improve the flavor.

French presses give a very full flavor, but the coffee is more acidic. Most people are also prone to grinding the coffee too finely.

If he likes espresso you get him a bialetti. If you want to be spiffy you could look for a vacuum pot, which is much like a french press, but has a filter (which reduces acid) and is way cool to watch.

If you want, I can talk about whisk(e)y too. There are several big differences (highland, lowland, island, campelltowns, speyside). I’ve not had all there are (I have not the money, nor the liver) so my experience is limited to about 60 scotches. 🙂

Pecunium
12 years ago

Quick primer:

The further north, the stronger the flavor. For really heavy peat look to the islands. For the moderate flavors most people are thinking of, a speyside or campelltown. For things which are good, and not as well known, Springbank is a very nice campelltown.

The Balvenie is very good. I like both the Double Barrel and the 15 year old.

For really smoky/peaty The Bowmore is good. Laphroig, Lagavulin and Talisker are probably the most peaty. For something different (brighter, with less seaweed) the Laphroig Quarter Cask) really nice, but Laphroig is one of (if not the) strongest peats in all Scotland.

Auchentoshen is very nice for a not quite lowland whisky. Cardhu is the base whisky for Haig and Haig Pinch, and has some very nice caramel notes, with hints of butterscotch.

If you want something more exotic Loch Dhu (the Black Whisky) is just that, the color of tar and so mild as to be barely recognisable as scotch. Sheep Dip has an incredibly pungent nose, but is (my my lights) a very easy drinking whisky.

That’s the top of my head.

Hershele Ostropoler
12 years ago

Viscaria:

My man’s serious about coffee – he roasts his own beans and everything – and this Christmas is our first gift-giving opportunity. My hipster parents tut-tutted that he doesn’t already own a French press, but the only coffee they ever drink is espresso so I don’t trust them in this matter at all.

I love the French press because I’m the only coffee drinker in the house and it’s the best way to make coffee a cup at a time. I refuse to buy the things with the pods because sometime in the 2030s the last company that makes those pods will go bankrupt or close that division or something and then what. I had a drip machine, but the coffee it made tasted like nothing at all, and then it broke.

I want to roast beans, but I don’t know a good fair-trade source for green coffee.

Bee:

Is a tavern an unusual thing where you guys live? They’re pretty common here. About as common as a pub, more common than an alehouse.

Yelp shows a handful of establishments within its idea of driving distance of my apartment using the word in their names, one near my parents’ house that replaced a restaurant they liked. I don’t know if any of them are taverns as opposed to bars or pubs (or restaurants), though.

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