Consider the plight of the poor, horny Man Going His Own Way. He may have convinced himself that women are icky monsters out to highjack his sperm and steal his money. He may have convinced himself we live in a femi-fascist gynocracy out to destroy men and civilization generally. Yet his disobedient penis can’t stop thinking about sex with these evil, filthy women.
And so he turns to his fellow MGTOWers to ask for help: what can I do, my brethren, to stop popping so many boners? Ed1974, a newbie on MGTOWforums.com, puts it this way in a plaintive recent post:
[M]ore than almost anything I want to be woman-free and contentment to live a woman-free life. For more or less all of my adult life I’ve played in to society’s demands that I have to have a woman, and preferably a pretty woman, in my life. I’ve done a lot of Internet dating and every friggin time I get involved with a woman I regret it. Either I just want to get some ass and the woman wants a lot more than that and makes a mess out of my life when I leave, or I end up spending way more money than I ever wanted to spend just to have her grace my life with her presence, or something else that fucks up my life. The bottom line is I sincerely want to live a life without the desire to have a woman in my life.
So Ed is taking steps to quell his desire:
1. I downloaded a firewall blocking all dating sites.
2. I’m going to read as many books on misandry that I can.
3. I’m going to take myself out of situations where I can get in trouble, such as bars.
4. I’m going to fill free time that I would normally spend out with some woman with something productive.
I also want to remember the bad times where I’ve had women who I’ve tried to get out of my life end up stalking me for months on end. And to be perfectly honest, I want to remember the time I got the clap from some skank. I also want to remember that I should be thankful that I’m not a baby daddy and I’ve never had any false rape charges against me.
Alas, but poor pretty Eddie is afraid that this won’t be enough, and begs the assembled MGTOWers for “other steps I should take.”
Site admin Nacho Vidal suggests he go another way entirely:
My advice would be to scrap the ‘steps’ you’ve taken and take your wanking up a notch! Also, have you looked into hiring a whore or two once a month?
Others jump in to endorse the masturbation-and-prostitute strategy, and encourage him to cultivate his hatred of women by reading from the ample selection of stories on the site about evil, depraved, disgusting women. As fairi5fair puts it:
I go to college and still get the biochemical reactions that play into the mate-spawn-die script when I see a 20 year old with a candy apple ass and perky tits, but my growing understanding of women in general helps to make it less urgent and more negligible everyday.
A few others have more novel advice. Our friend womanhater suggests a trip to the mall:
Sit in the food court, and spend a good three hours there. Leisurely sip on some coffee, and simply watch.
See all the soulless men being dragged around by cupcake holding her bags. You’ll see the total absence of hope in the eyes of men in this trap. You’ll see his brain calculating the immense debt being run up, and yet he knows he’s fucked.
Pay attention to the stupid whores in training aged 15 or so, and simply listen the absolute shit running out of their mouth. Watch their behavior and internalize that every twat you see aged 25 was doing the exact same shit a decade ago.
Every time I start to feel my ghosting resolve start to slip, I go to the mall for a few hours. Clears my fucking head every time.
NewWorldMan suggests a sort of mind-over-boner strategy:
Sounds like BS, I know, but telling myself (actually saying the sentence in my head at the moment of attraction): “I control my dick, my dick doesn’t control me — actually works for me.
Frederick326 suggests an anatomy lesson:
Read up on vaginas. They’re fucking disgusting.
And fairi5fair also links to the (somewhat NSFW) video below. I’m not sure what exactly it’s supposed to accomplish other than to remind us that Japan leads the world in baffling entertainment product:
^ And considering all of the above, doesn’t it kind of imply in the end that women get to dictate how men should behave, while men have to listen and obey? That’s a bit misandric isn’t it?
Not towards me personally, but I think I’d notice it in social settings at least once in a while. Even if I was oblivious most of the time, if it happens as commonly as you and your friends claim, you’d think I would still see enough cases to make me go “hmm”. And yet I can count such instances on the fingers on one hand, with the perpetrator immediately drawing anger from everyone present, men and women alike.
To be honest I don’t think it’s even possible to agree on something like this, because I think our perceptions of the world are just too different.
(the above was meant as an answer to Cassandra. I need sleep)
With my friend what seems to happen is that when she’s in full-on social anxiety and withdrawal mode it draws in predators like chum in the water with sharks. The more freaked out she gets, the more creeps bother her. It’s really a disturbing thing to watch. I end up wanting to stand in front of her and face down the creeps all YOU SHALL NOT PASS, which is kind of hilarious since she’s 5 inches taller than me and much more physically imposing.
You know, the former coworker I was talking about before isn’t on the spectrum at all. In fact he has excellent social skills (he’s a successful salesman), there’s just something off about him that becomes more obvious the more you talk to him. You don’t notice it at first, because he actively conceals it. I know what you mean about a lot of people reading aspies as creepy, and I think some of that is gendered in that female aspies get read less as creepy and more as just weird, but again, that’s based on people’s perceptions of threat.
You wouldn’t, actually, because most guys have enough sense not to act like that towards women in front of their male friends. Again, you’re doing the “if I don’t see it then it’s not real” thing and ignoring the fact that you have no experience of what it’s like walking around in a female body.
Go to a major metropolitan area. Any will do as long as the state it is in has laws allowing for restraining orders-specifically ones that outline which courts you go to in order to get them. Go to that major city’s local court and sit there all day through the requested protective orders hearings and petitions.
Then slink away knowing that what you claim never happens, happens way way too often.
Again, you’re doing the “if I don’t see it then it’s not real” thing
You’re asking me to believe something that goes against my personal observations, based on the word of a few vocal feminists on a male-bashing blog. I think a little skepticism is justified.
Golly, it IS misandric to expect men to be respectful of a woman’s boundaries! How dare we be so hateful to men to demand that they treat us with the same level of respect as they wish to be treated with!
I don’t care if you believe it or not, actually. But if you come into this space and go “it doesn’t happen” I’m going to point out that it does, and so is everyone else.
Golly, it IS misandric to expect men to be respectful of a woman’s boundaries! How dare we be so hateful to men to demand that they treat us with the same level of respect as they wish to be treated with!
And yet I see guys teasing and trash-talking each other all the time without filing harassment charges and restraining orders against each other. Funny.
I don’t care if you believe it or not, actually. But if you come into this space and go “it doesn’t happen” I’m going to point out that it does, and so is everyone else.
That I can believe. I’ve rarely seen more single-minded dogpiling onto any dissenting opinion than in this place.
Which is why I said go look at it in action. There are real hearings going on every weekday in courtrooms all across the country (if you are American) where you can see it first hand.
Are these guys gay, and are they following other guys down the street muttering obscenities at them? Is the trash talking about what sexual things they’d like to do to each other, and are they serious about it? If not, your analogy sucks.
LOL. “This thing that you say happens to you doesn’t actually happen” is your idea of a dissenting opinion?
You don’t get to tell other people what their reality is, and it’s hilarious that you think you must know better than they do what happens in their lives.
So you just randomly go up to strange men in the street and say to them “hey baby, can I get into those pants?” Or leave notes on their car windows telling them how nice they look…every single day for a month?
Or in one notable case, give a detailed outline for every step taken by this other guy for three years in a row? Every date, who it was with, every visit from mom, every time he took the kids to the park, how long he was at the park, who he talked to at the park…This is from a real court case by the way. I never went through such a terrible thing myself-to have someone you do not live with know that much about you? Scary.
Well, see, the dissenting opinion here is dissenting to the opinion “This is something that happens in the experiences of women and not men” with “in my experience as a man, that does not happen.” – It’s a “dissenting opinion,” I suppose but there’s kinda a problem with it somewhere, I think, in terms of why it’s not that great an arguement against the original opinion. But I’m not a dude.
There are men who it happens to, actually. It’s just that they’re generally celebrities, in my experience.
Oh I always felt sorry for David Letterman and his experience with one of his stalkers-one night him and his girlfriend woke up to her standing in his bedroom. The poor lady was dreadfully ill though and sadly, she never was able to get the help she needed.
“You don’t get to tell other people what their reality is, and it’s hilarious that you think you must know better than they do what happens in their lives.”
And yet the gang here has no trouble doing exactly that to those who disagree with their view of reality.
So you’re just going to dodge the fact that you’re not actually in a position to know what happens to women when you’re not around to see it, then? Again, LOL.
I’ve seen and heard much creepier stuff than the Letterman thing, actually. Like the guy who had fans break into his hotel room to leave him presents, the room where he’d already dumped all his stuff, so he came back and found gifts with little notes on his bed. Which he then had to sleep in.
If it was me I’d have shoved a dresser up against the door. Fandom can definitely make people really fucking creepy.
*rethinks her plans to become an international superstar*
oy…Was that Jackie Chan? I heard his fans were a little…out there.
More like “this is something that happens in the alleged experiences of feminist women on blogs created for the purpose of bashing and mocking men”. Should I give equal credibility to all MRAs talking about how they got screwed over by their bitch ex-wives, or shot down and humiliated in public for trying to approach a woman, or been victims of false rape charges? After all, those are things that happen in their experiences. Why are they less valid than your experiences? This is the problem, you’re sitting there and claiming that your view is valid and everyone else’s is wrong. And now I’m off to sleep.
Nope – this dude is in a metal band. I have a lot of respect for him for actually having the backbone to admit that he sometimes finds the fans frightening. Most men aren’t willing to admit that they’re sometimes scared of a bunch of teenage girls.
And see, we could actually have an interesting conversation about how this stuff is gendered and why those little girls don’t realise that they’re being creepy in part because of the socialisation that says that women are asexual and therefore not sexually threatening, and men are supposed to be up for sex all the time so why would they mind strangers trying to grope them as long as they’re girls? But instead it’s probably going to be another 30 comments of Broseidon going “men do not do creepy things to women, stop telling men not to be creepy towards women you misandrist bitch”.
I wish there was a way to filter troll comments so everyone else could actually have the more interesting conversations.
It is true, women are not taught that they too can creep men out. We do see men coming in for protective orders because of that. The sad thing is when the men who do make it in check themselves from admitting-“I am asking for this because this other person is not respecting my boundaries and is in fact scaring me.”
One guy claimed she was stealing from him but upon being asked admitted the woman had been hitting him.