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Dear Men Who Hate Ladies: How do I make my boner go away?

Women -- don't let them tempt you with their witchy ways!

Consider the plight of the poor, horny Man Going His Own Way. He may have convinced himself that women are icky monsters out to highjack his sperm and steal his money. He may have convinced himself we live in a femi-fascist gynocracy out to destroy men and civilization generally. Yet his disobedient penis can’t stop thinking about sex with these evil, filthy women.

And so he turns to his fellow MGTOWers to ask for help: what can I do, my brethren, to stop popping so many boners? Ed1974, a newbie on MGTOWforums.com, puts it this way in a plaintive recent post:

[M]ore than almost anything I want to be woman-free and contentment to live a woman-free life. For more or less all of my adult life I’ve played in to society’s demands that I have to have a woman, and preferably a pretty woman, in my life. I’ve done a lot of Internet dating and every friggin time I get involved with a woman I regret it. Either I just want to get some ass and the woman wants a lot more than that and makes a mess out of my life when I leave, or I end up spending way more money than I ever wanted to spend just to have her grace my life with her presence, or something else that fucks up my life. The bottom line is I sincerely want to live a life without the desire to have a woman in my life.

So Ed is taking steps to quell his desire:

1. I downloaded a firewall blocking all dating sites.

2. I’m going to read as many books on misandry that I can.

3. I’m going to take myself out of situations where I can get in trouble, such as bars.

4. I’m going to fill free time that I would normally spend out with some woman with something productive.

I also want to remember the bad times where I’ve had women who I’ve tried to get out of my life end up stalking me for months on end. And to be perfectly honest, I want to remember the time I got the clap from some skank. I also want to remember that I should be thankful that I’m not a baby daddy and I’ve never had any false rape charges against me.

Alas, but poor pretty Eddie is afraid that this won’t be enough, and begs the assembled MGTOWers for “other steps I should take.”

Site admin Nacho Vidal suggests he go another way entirely:

My advice would be to scrap the ‘steps’ you’ve taken and take your wanking up a notch! Also, have you looked into hiring a whore or two once a month?

Others jump in to endorse the masturbation-and-prostitute strategy, and encourage him to cultivate his hatred of women by reading from the ample selection of stories on the site about evil, depraved, disgusting women.  As fairi5fair puts it:

I go to college and still get the biochemical reactions that play into the mate-spawn-die script when I see a 20 year old with a candy apple ass and perky tits, but my growing understanding of women in general helps to make it less urgent and more negligible everyday.

A few others have more novel advice.  Our friend womanhater suggests a trip to the mall:

Sit in the food court, and spend a good three hours there. Leisurely sip on some coffee, and simply watch.

See all the soulless men being dragged around by cupcake holding her bags. You’ll see the total absence of hope in the eyes of men in this trap. You’ll see his brain calculating the immense debt being run up, and yet he knows he’s fucked.

Pay attention to the stupid whores in training aged 15 or so, and simply listen the absolute shit running out of their mouth. Watch their behavior and internalize that every twat you see aged 25 was doing the exact same shit a decade ago.

Every time I start to feel my ghosting resolve start to slip, I go to the mall for a few hours. Clears my fucking head every time.

NewWorldMan suggests a sort of mind-over-boner strategy:

Sounds like BS, I know, but telling myself (actually saying the sentence in my head at the moment of attraction): “I control my dick, my dick doesn’t control me — actually works for me.

Frederick326 suggests an anatomy lesson:

Read up on vaginas. They’re fucking disgusting.

And fairi5fair also links to the (somewhat NSFW) video below. I’m not sure what exactly it’s supposed to accomplish other than to remind us that Japan leads the world in baffling entertainment product:

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Lauralot
Lauralot
12 years ago

And so Broseidon takes the very mature and adult response of shoving his fingers in his ears and shouting “La la la, I can’t hear you!”

Broseidon
Broseidon
12 years ago

Guys… We have been “doin it rong!”. Broseidon knows what harassment is. If we just admit that ladybranes aren’t capable of recognising real harassment, and let Broseidon inform us of when women have been harassed, then his perception of the world will match other people’s reality.

You’re right, I’m just one person with no real power, which makes me wonder why you’re getting so worked up over this. If enough people share my viewpoint though, maybe there’s something there.

Wetherby
Wetherby
12 years ago

Nope, I already said I agree some things do count as harassment. They’re just not as grave or as common as you make them sound. Why is it that some women see creepiness and harassment everywhere, while others experience it so rarely they don’t even think about it?

Because some people (not just women) are more robust than others. My wife, for instance, simply laughed out loud and hung up when someone rang her up at random and initiated a conversation that segued into the request “Can I come round and come in your face?” – but it’s not too hard to imagine other people being seriously freaked out by it.

And regardless of the reaction of the intended victim, I assume we both agree that that behavior seriously crosses the line?

KathleenB
KathleenB
12 years ago

NWO: Your whole money rant? That shit was perfectly legal for a man to do to his wife in England (possibly the whole Empire?). He could force her to work twelve hours or more a day, starve her, make her sleep in the coal cellar, beat the living shit out of her, force her to have baby after baby until she died, keep every penny she earned. If I recall correctly, when slavery was legal in Britain, slaves had more legal rights the married women did.

Ah, the good old days, eh? Almost makes you want to reminisce about how you had to work twenty-nine hours a day at mill, AND had to pay mill owner for permission to come to work!

Broseidon
Broseidon
12 years ago

.And so Broseidon takes the very mature and adult response of shoving his fingers in his ears and shouting “La la la, I can’t hear you!”

Ah, I see the hecklers have arrived on the sidelines.

Pecunium
12 years ago

I understand that your schtick is writing out long, tedious essays until the other party gets bored and gives up, letting you declare victory. You’re not the first nor the last to use this strategy.

You understand incorrectly, it’s probably a misperception based on how often people need to explain things to you.

Broseidon
Broseidon
12 years ago

Broseidon: Happens all the time? I’ve spent a lot of time on the bus/subway. The number of times I’ve had someone’s (anyone’s) groin that close to my face is in the single digits (and that’s on the WTC PATH in rush hour crowds).

Again with the personal experience to counter something I said, after attacking me for the very same thing. Are you honestly unaware of what you’re doing?

Bee
Bee
12 years ago

Why is it that some women see creepiness and harassment everywhere, while others experience it so rarely they don’t even think about it? There’s confirmation bias here, but not on my part.

You are right that some women are harassed more than others; it doesn’t have anything to do with confirmation bias or incorrectly interpreting friendly interactions as harassment, though. It’s just, that’s part of their daily reality, whereas for me, for example, it’s something that I rarely have to put up with.

Why is that? Any number of reasons, I guess. I’m privileged in that I never take public transportation, and very rarely walk around busier areas of the city without my boyfriend. I also have kind of a don’t-fuck-with-me look (humorless feminist that I am), am tall, am older (invisible), and try to stay out of situations where I’m around people I don’t know. All of those things could play into it, or perhaps none of them do. But the fact that I’m not harassed in public (or private) regularly doesn’t mean that other people aren’t.

Again, it’s weird that that’s the conclusion you reached, though.

Pecunium
12 years ago

Broseidon: If enough people share my viewpoint though, maybe there’s something there.

Fallacy: Appeal to authority. “Sixty million frenchman can’t be wrong”

Broseidon
Broseidon
12 years ago

You understand incorrectly, it’s probably a misperception based on how often people need to explain things to you.

Yes, I believe the last time someone felt the need to “explain things to me” in your fashion was when I made the mistake of confusing Captain Picard with Captain Kirk.

Holly Pervocracy
12 years ago

Okay, heroicman is so Samuel.

He also seems to think that masturbation, and being able to view people more conventionally-attractive than your partner, are disturbing new trends among the Kids These Days.

Broseidon
Broseidon
12 years ago

“Fallacy: Appeal to authority. “Sixty million frenchman can’t be wrong”

Figures you’d say something like that. A normal person hears 100 people say the sky is blue, they tend to believe it. A feminist goes “lol, bingo!”

And you got something against Frenchmen?

Wetherby
Wetherby
12 years ago

I have a question for you based on your comment.
What kind of options do you mean that can end up improving mens lives?

They can start taking women seriously as human beings with their own legitimate ambitions, needs and desires, and make honest efforts to see things from their point of view. In other words, the exact opposite of what many of the guys quoted here are doing. Oh, and the ability to learn from your mistakes – both in terms of your own behavior and in hanging around with people who aren’t right for you.

This really isn’t rocket science, and most men seem to be able to get their heads around it, at least eventually.

I guess these mra guys who blame women for their reduced libido is they feel they were rejected in high school or college by women and now as these guys approach their 30′s and 40′s they do not want to let go of the bitterness of the past they may have had with women.

I completely agree. But it’s utterly self-defeating.

Bee
Bee
12 years ago

Okay, heroicman is so Samuel.

Seconded. Totally seconded.

Pecunium
12 years ago

Broseidon: Again with the personal experience to counter something I said, after attacking me for the very same thing. Are you honestly unaware of what you’re doing?

Well, you’ve already declared you won’t accept studies, because you don’t trust us.

And you are telling us that your perceptions are trumps. I’m just providing counterexamples.

I also notice you’ve stopped trying to argue your case, and are spending your time pretending this is all about how unfairly you are being treated/how I argue.

I commend you to the “essay” which explicates the difference in application of the anecdotes being used.

Holly Pervocracy
12 years ago

So, um… if real harassment never actually happens and it’s just a myth, it shouldn’t be much of a hardship for men to not harass women, right?

Broseidon seems to be coming at this from a “that never happens, also you can’t take it away from us!” sort of angle.

heroicman
heroicman
12 years ago

Ozymandias commented to NWO about somethings that can make them happy
ozymandias42 | November 27, 2011 at 8:04 pm

Here, I will help.

THINGS THAT HAVE RECENTLY MADE OZY HAPPY AND MIGHT MAKE NWO HAPPY
Cake
Achieving something you didn’t think you could
Silly songs about being a bird-plane
Christmas music
Giving presents to people you love
Talking to your friends
Writing stories
Christmas-flavored tea
Taking a shower
Baking
Taking a nap
Reading Rolling Stone
Meeting new people
Watching the world go by out of the window of a car
The Manboobz Chattybox!

I cannot resist this suggestion. Narrate this list along with the song ‘What a wonderful world”.

I can almost envision Good ole Louie singing that list to his song.

Pecunium
12 years ago

Sure sounds like samuel. That article showed up before, same sort of creeped out by men wanking, and “porn is ok, but they use it” complaint.

Pecunium
12 years ago

Holly: He’s more coming from the position that what men do isn’t harassment unless a man who sees it thinks it is.

It’s sort of like NWO’s “real rape” thing. When he thinks someone has been raped, she’s been raped; otherwise it’s “buyers remorse” and what she deserves for being female in public.

KathleenB
KathleenB
12 years ago

Louis makes me happy. Louis and Ella are sublime.

I like this version a billion times better than the one in Shall We Dance. Mostly because Fred Astaire couldn’t sing his way out of a wet paper bag.

Broseidon
Broseidon
12 years ago

I also notice you’ve stopped trying to argue your case, and are spending your time pretending this is all about how unfairly you are being treated/how I argue.

When the response is “you’re wrong because I say so, and also stupid!” there doesn’t seem to be much of a point to keep arguing, is there? Besides, at this point I’d just be repeating myself.

So, um… if real harassment never actually happens and it’s just a myth, it shouldn’t be much of a hardship for men to not harass women, right?

Correct. But if those women start seeing harassment everywhere and accusing men of it, what can the men do?

Lauralot
Lauralot
12 years ago

Lauralot’s the heckler, says the man who was earlier bragging about trolling here.

Lolwhat.

Broseidon
Broseidon
12 years ago

Alright, it’s been educational but real life calls. Cya later.

Pecunium
12 years ago

Broseidon: If I was saying, “You’re wrong because I say so”, you’d have a point.

Go ahead, make an argument that I’m arguing in bad faith. Not an assertion, an argument.

Because That’s what I’ve been doing (those comments you complain are too long to read). I’ve been making arguments, and responding to arguments.

You’ve been attacking me, not my arguments. That’s the difference.

Broseidon
Broseidon
12 years ago

I was bragging about trolling? whuh? silly hecklers.

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