The director of the first Human Centipede film – the one about a psychopathic doctor who sews three unwilling and unwitting captives together mouth-to-anus to make a sort of “centipede” — proudly declared that his film was “100% medically accurate.” That is, he found a doctor who was willing to say that if one were indeed to create such a centipede, the second and third segments (i.e., people) would be able to survive, provided that you supplemented their rather dismal diet with IV drips to give them the nutrition they were lacking.
This dubious claim to 100% accuracy came to mind today as I perused a post by the blogger who calls himself Dalrock, a manospherian nitwit with a penchant for pseudoscientific defenses of old-fashioned misogyny. In a post with the whimsical title “We are trapped on Slut Island and Traditional Conservatives are our Gilligan,” Dalrock argues that the best “solution” to out-of-wedlock births is some good old-fashioned slut shaming.
Here’s how he breaks down the (imaginary) numbers in a post that is “100% mathematically accurate” – which is to say, not accurate at all:
Assume we are starting off with 100 sluts and 30 alphas/players. The sluts are happily riding on the alpha carousel. Now we introduce slut shaming. It isn’t fully effective of course, but it manages to convince 15 of the would be sluts not to be sluts after all. This means an additional 15 women are again potentially suitable for marriage. This directly translates into fewer fatherless children. This also makes the next round of slut shaming easier. Instead of having 99 peers eagerly cheering her on her ride, each slut now has 15 happily married women shaming her and only 84 other sluts encouraging her. After the next round this becomes 30 happily married women shaming the sluts, and only 69 other sluts cheering them on, and so on. This process continues until all but the most die hard sluts are off the carousel. You will never discourage them all, but you can do a world better than we are doing today.
Why not shame the fathers as well, while we’re at it? Dalrock explains that this just doesn’t make good mathematical sense:
Start with the same base assumption of 100 sluts and 30 players. Now apply shame to the players. Unfortunately shame is less effective on players than it is on sluts, so instead of discouraging 15% of them (4.5) in the first round, it only discourages three of them. No problem!, says the Gilligan [the social conservative], at least there are now three fewer sluts now that three of the evil alphas have been shamed away, and all without creating any unhappy sluts! But unfortunately it doesn’t work that way. The remaining 27 players are more than happy to service the extra sluts. They are quite maddeningly actually delighted with the new situation. Even worse, the next round of player shaming is even less effective than the first. This time only 2 players are discouraged, and one of the other 3 realizes that his player peers are picking up the slack anyway and reopens for business. This means in net there are still 26 players, more than enough to handle all of the sluts you can throw at them.
Well, there’s no arguing with that!
Seriously, there’s no arguing with that, because it is an imaginary construct with only the most tenuous connection with how things work in the real world. “But … MATH!” doesn’t really work as an argument here, since human beings don’t actually behave according to simplistic mathematical formulas.
Film critic note: While the first Human Centipede film offered little more than a workmanlike treatment of a fantastical idea, the recently released sequel, which details the attempts of a deranged Human Centipede superfan to take human-centipeding to the next level, is actually sort of brilliant. If you like that sort of thing.
I believe LAST time he didn’t have an answer, he sputtered out that without the government forcing people to be gay (nebody here feel forced?) and forcing women to have abortions, it just wouldn’t happen so he wouldn’t have to worry about it xD But he’s said different things since, so I’m curious which NWO we get this time xD
I love the smell of unintentional irony in the morning.
Those little dogs are lovable!! Cute, bright and playful. Anybody who sees them would want to pet and play with them.
But, sorry girls, I am not recommending them for flight training anytime soon. Women also are desirable and precious in many ways, but I still hink that, with all due apologies to Amelia Earhart and Sally Ride, we’ll leave piloting, navigating, and aircraft/spacecraft repair, inspection and engineering to men for the time being–at least a few million years.
PLEASE!!
yeah, screw women who are good at things, we can’t make use of their talent until angry loser dkm stops feeling threatened by their success
what a stupid fucking world you live in, dkm. ‘ya this woman can fly into space and shit, but we cant let her do that because it might make me unccomfortable‘
‘oh, man, people might have forgotten about my weird insecurities. better shoe-horn in some overwrought prolix about women doing stuff, just to reaffirm that i am, in fact still scared of them.’
Who’s “we”, Meller? As others have already pointed out, women are doing all those things right now. Have been for some time, actually. But keep pretending this is some kind of ridiculous scandal if you want. No skin off my nose if you want to act like a complete buffoon.
I’m going to ignore that DKM thinks women have the same ability to fly a plane as dogs do, because it’s not even surprising anymore. I will point out that I have no idea what dogs he’s talking about. Psst, hey Meller: when you use the determiner “those” you’re referring back to relevant dogs in the discourse. There were no dogs discussed in the thread, as far as I can tell. Did you get confused because there were cats?
“we’ll leave piloting, navigating, and aircraft/spacecraft repair, inspection and engineering to men for the time being–at least a few million years.”
Um…why?
DKM, do you realize that women are actually NOT little dogs, or cute little kittens, or fluffy bunnies? Women are actually human beings, just like men, with the same range of intelligence and potential and talent as men.
Why is this so difficult for you to understand?
@Joanna: Because women doing anything other than tending to the home makes DKM feel uncomfortable. And that’s all the justification we need to strip the rights of half of the population!
DKDUMBO: we’ll leave piloting, navigating, and aircraft/spacecraft repair, inspection and engineering to men for the time being–at least a few million years.
You asshole, didn’t you see the links about the women already PILOTING????????????
Since WWII at least.
What planet are you living on?
Yeah. Women are ALREADY pilots. Women are ALREADY scientists. Women ALREADY have gone to space. You’re shutting the barn door after the entire flock has run off to Timbuktu, here, DKM, and it is as amusing as it is impractical.
Athos obviously.
DKM is intimidated by women with professions outside the home. After all, if a woman is a pilot, and he is not, he is apparently less of a man. Gosh you men are so silly.
And this has improved things HOW?
Everything everywhere is getting worse by the day, and if ithis isn’t the fault of modern women–and the bonehead hiring and promotion policies inflicted upon us by the EEOC, the Snivel Rights division lawyers (or is it “liars”) of the ‘Justice department’ or the even more bonehead rulings from a corrupt and destructive Federal Judiciary–than whose fault is it?
More women working outside the home…
Isn’t it WONDERFUL?
“Women are actually human beings, just like men…”
Meller doesn’t think men are human beings either. We’re just an extension of his ego. That’s why all men agree with him, even when we don’t.
…People. Some people are greedy, corrupt, shortsighted, or incompetent. This is regardless of gender or race or sexual orientation or anything else because human beings aren’t perfect. Blaming all the worlds problems on one group of people (most of whom have little to nothing to do with policy making decisions and the like) is absurd and stupid.
Ami: I wonder if NWO is modulating his voice on the current crop of Republican Prez candidates who, in their speeches and media junkets, have banged on about how the US is a morally Christian nation that was founded “only” on ideals of Christian freedom and founded against unChristian, non-freedom-producing evils. Essentially, they yoke Christian values as the only values that support, nurture, and allow freedom; therefore, any value systems different from Christianity must, by their logic, be un-free or repressive systems.
As a result, even a repressive system of identities and values such as NWO’s becomes the only system where real freedom exists. The rest becomes statements like, “jerks, why can’t you see that freedom can’t exist outside of the borders that I assert are the only place to have freedom? Why do all you hate freedom? Like, even though you can’t really recognize your humanity here, or express a different and non-harmful version of society, you need to trust me when I say all this freedom is really neat-o! You can buy all the Coke Zero you want!”
Yup! A quote from the article:
I believe the reason things are not so good right now has little to do with women being let out of the home (which was only for a small segment of society anyway) to work in actual jobs and more to do with certain men having really stupid economic policies.
Oops, that’s broken hey? I shouldn’t try to be so fancy.
http://www.economist.com/node/6802551
Everything everywhere is getting worse by the day, and if ithis isn’t the fault of modern women–and the bonehead hiring and promotion policies inflicted upon us by the EEOC, the Snivel Rights division lawyers (or is it “liars”) of the ‘Justice department’ or the even more bonehead rulings from a corrupt and destructive Federal Judiciary–than whose fault is it?
except none of this is true, its a sad little lie you keep telling yourself because you have some primal need for it to be true.
most people, sane people dont believe the world is going to down hill, and arent desperately casting around for someone to blame for their problems, but we sane people cant argue with the crazies because we are arguing against a fantasy that exists entirely within your tiny, warped mind.
all we can do is beg you to stop lying to yourself, dkm. youll be a lot happier when you do.
Wahou, that’s some twisted logic.
Melller, tell me if I am wrong:
Women have more freedom nowadays thanks to feminists, bad thing X is happening nowadays, therefore feminists are responsible for X?
Have you thought about warning all these people they should kick women out? Because right now, they *actually* believe that being qualified is enough and having a dick is not a requirement to fly a plane.
On a related note, dogs have already been on space, and the first one was a female. What a bitch!
On a still related note, most puppies are not only more lovable but also less disturbed and hateful than the average troll on manboobz. So point for puppies.
newsflash dkm: just because youre a childish, angsty reactionary doesnt mean anyone else has to be. it just means we have to put up with you whining when you dont get your (incredibly backwards) way. its the same curse people with their heads on straight have had to deal with for all of history, and its not any different just because it takes you a thousand (poorly chosen) words to say it
Exceeeeept…the Cisalpine Republic and the pro-French Italian nationalist revolts. Which I forgot. Point to Rutee.
DKM: More reactionary than the Tsarist army.
Hey DKM, I thought you’d have loved these chicks, they defended the Winter Palace against those evil Commies.
OMG, DKM, Communists versus women with guns doing things with their lives must be like Alien vs. Predator for you. Which one terrifies you more?