So a six man crew has just touched down on Earth after a nearly two-year Russian expedition to mars. Well, that’s not quite true. The five men have returned from an imaginary trip to a fake mars; in reality, they spent the entirety of the “mission” sitting in some trailers in a parking garage in Moscow. Except for a brief interlude in which several of the fake marsonauts took a brief stroll on the surface of fake mars – also inside a trailer in the parking lot.
The idea behind all this? To see if six dudes could manage to stay sane while stuck in cramped quarters together for the length of time it would take to go to mars and back.
One of the many weird details about this weird faux-mission is that it was an all-dude affair. None of the marsonauts were women. Not, evidently, because the mission planners thought that women would be less capable than men of handing the pressure of a fake (or even a real) mission to mars. But because if they sent any ladies along, the men would want to have sex with them. As one news account explains:
Controversially, the experiment did not include a woman, with researchers clearly wanting to avoid it degenerating into a scientific version of television’s sexual tension-filled “Big Brother”.
When the “returning” marsonauts stepped out of their “spaceship” at the end of the experiment, the same news account notes,
They were each presented with a flower by young female researchers in white coats as a reward for their endeavours.
It has not been confirmed if the marsonauts popped boners at the sight.
I for one support the notion of male-only spaceflights, real or phony. And not just because the ladies would turn our space capsules into deep space slutmobiles. Just imagine what would happen if a female-infested space crew had an encounter of the third kind with some really handsome space alien dudes – the interstellar equivalents of Brad Pitt. You know what would happen next: those dirty sluts would sell out our planet for a ride on the little green cock carousel.
Ah, who am I kidding, those sluts would sneer at the little green men, holding out for the tall greys.
Audiovidual supplement: Three videos. One, Rachel Maddow talking about the mission at its halfway point. Two, a brief look at everyday life on the “spaceship.” And last but definitely not least: a video of the fake-mars walk. Inside a trailer. You have to watch at least a few seconds of that one.
Hippodemeia – Yes. and furthermore, you mentioned Major Tom and we’re talking about space and stuff, and so we must honor the memory of the greatest sweet awkward nerdy scientist pudgy dude ever to be a meth cook murdered on the orders of a fellow meth cook he tried to make friends with.
Damn, I miss you, Gale. 🙁
Eh, I think a lot of it is just misplaced ego. It’s very exciting to know something that other people don’t. And there’s two ways to do that:
1) Study, read, experiment, learn, until you’ve gained knowledge most people don’t have. Hard goddamn work.
2) Believe something absurd and refuse to change your mind. That way, you also have “knowledge” most people don’t have, and you can totally lord it over them! Much easier!
Holly, I think that NWO is deeply convinced his mechanical technician experience gives him a great and true understanding of science and logic and methodology, and how dare we tell him otherwise, honestly.
Adding – There’s a very interesting thing about crankypants internet trolls, racist or otherwise, or should I say FROTHING racist or otherwise. It’s the idea that science and engineering and tech careers are still mostly white male, and such, but this is all because they are meritocracies, with all the smart people, and hard numbers, and this and that, unlike all them dang soft stupid humanites and medicine and law. Because of this, when they look for an opinion on humanities, medicine and law, they automatically consider the word of a mechanical engineer sacrosanct, because he is in the smart people club of mechanical engineering, and thus would know more about history than some goddamn historian.
STEM cred, in this world, is your “smart person” pass. And so the bigger the STEM cred, the better the expertise on EVERYTHING.
And thus the STEM cred of any troll is loudly trumpeted regardless of relevance in the eyes of anybody who doesn’t subscribe to this worldview.
This does not so much apply to the STEM cred of women, poc, etc, because of affirmative action and such, of course. Heck, I was a military electrician’s mate on the way to my endless and ongoing quest to become a History Prof. Which I think is the real thing that’s going to affirm me as a professional historian, probably because I’m a woman…
@Zhinxy I’m a social worker… where does that put me? :3
You are the scum of the earth, and steal children from their fathers to sell to feminists.
I actually haven’t done any stealing….
…yet
lazy ass bureaucrat
It’s interesting how if you take some of the professions we know ppl are here, they do kinda fit the MRA idea of “male” vs “female” xD
You’re a history major (i.e. dirty academic), Ithiliana is an English professor (i.e. dirty academic), I’m a social worker (i.e. vile succubus),.. Holly’s studying nursing and she works at a hospital where no doubt she steals the blood of men in car crashes to give to women with ingrown toenails…
NWO’s a mechanic (i.e. all knowing, all seeing brilliant man forced to use his hands over his brilliant mind) .. Brandon’s a filmmaker…. MRAL’s a professional gary stu…
That settles it. Nature over nurture. So we should all get nurturing!
History professors being well known for their nurturing!
Well, now that it’s all about feelings and telling people they were oppressed and teaching them to blame the white men, it sure is! As long as you’re worth nurturing… Nurturing isn’t for those we name OPPRESSOR!
p.s. We’re totally spamming. 😉
women also can’t stop talking XD
@zhinxy srsly though, it is interesting that we have a lot of commenters who either are studying or practice law… or are on the frontline of stuff (hospital staff, social worker, etc) but none of our experiences either studying or working with all the stuff MRAs complain about (law,, treatment of abuse victims, shelters, etc) count to the MRAs who just “know” things xD
That. Really, it IS fascinating.
Oh and a history major in you, and yet they lecture on about history as if THEY KNOW even if their knowledge of history comes from the same place a lot of what they “know” comes from, which is conversations in MRA spaces xD Like there’s a lot of weird blind acceptance of what other MRAs say… it’s the whole thing ppl do, where b/c ANOTHER person says something authoritatively, and it’s something you want to believe, you just take that and remember it as a fact in your mind that has been backed up, not because YOU heard the evidence but b/c you assume the person who said it is saying it from evidence. xD
“You know what would happen next: those dirty sluts would sell out our planet for a ride on the little green cock carousel.
Ah, who am I kidding, those sluts would sneer at the little green men, holding out for the tall greys.”
Funniest manboobz post evar
Fucking hell, man, Mars needs women astronauts too!
“NWO’s a mechanic (i.e. all knowing, all seeing brilliant man forced to use his hands over his brilliant mind) .. Brandon’s a filmmaker…. MRAL’s a professional gary stu…”
I thought they were all professional victims. Meanwhile, I’m a journalist (makes up and publishes lies in order to destroy the lives of good male polticians, even though I actually write about entertainment) and Lauralot seems to be a college student (thus depriving some poor young man of the academic career he could have had without affirmative action, and also making her uterus shrivel up and die from too much reading).
“And thus the STEM cred of any troll is loudly trumpeted regardless of relevance in the eyes of anybody who doesn’t subscribe to this worldview.”
Or the asserted credentials, at least. I often have doubts about the reality.
Heck, and I might as well say — engineer, the kind with an actual degree in engineering and who actually works as an engineer. Which probably makes me forty-seven kinds of evil, right?
None of the marsonauts were women. Not, evidently, because the mission planners thought that women would be less capable than men of handing the pressure of a fake (or even a real) mission to mars.
***************
Well, they sure don’t seem very capable of handling tool kits.
I’m in STEM! Biology — which is the ishy squishy girly icky vagina pussy wussy wimp stupid science that never uses math. And if it hadn’t been before all us ladies joined, it sure is now. 😀
Ooh, they should ask us! We manbooberz are pro at dealing with tools.