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Men’s Rights Redditors: Guys who kill their exes — who can blame them?

A couple of intriguing quotes from Reddit’s Men’s Rights subreddit.

The topic at hand: A Redditor claims an ex falsely accused him of rape and caused him various other problems and basically acted like a shit. No one, of course, can possibly know if the guy is telling the truth, but the r/mr regulars all assume the alleged false accuser is guilty until proven innocent. (And maybe not even then.)

Naturally, some of the regulars use this as an opportunity to discuss how completely understandable it is when guys kill their exes.

Really, in this misandrist world, dudes murdering their exes is totally like slaves murdering their masters. Illegal, sure, but who can blame them? At least that’s how texaswildfires sees it:

 

Yep, in his mind, dudes today are totally in the exact same situation as slaves in the antebellum south — so when a guy murders his ex, the person you should feel empathy with is the murderer.

Naturally, both of these comments got upvotes, because that’s just how r/mr rolls these days.

 

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Pecunium
13 years ago

Dave, if you could fix that blockquote failure, I’d really like it.

🙂

If not, it’s still readable.

ithiliana
13 years ago

@Pecunium: Heavens, using Brandon’s own words against him!

What fallacy is that now ;>

Pecunium
13 years ago

ithiliana: I think it’s either ad logicum or ad rhetorica

Pecunium
13 years ago

:0 🙂 😀

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
13 years ago

… Heyyy, wait a second… Some of those are my words!!! :O

Words that probably were a bit off the mark. >.> Ah well.

(the “Brandon, like most MRAs, thinks…” bit)

ithiliana
13 years ago

@Kirbywarp: there was html fail, and I admit to not reading in great detail (sneaking in before work!). Or even going back to the original and reading carefully!

Pecunium
13 years ago

Kirby, yes, they are. But they aren’t the one’s he was denying.

kristinmh
kristinmh
13 years ago

I feel we have reached a troll equilibrium here, where Brandon will continue to be ridiculous and we will continue to mock him.

I’m ok with that, though I too wonder exactly what he gets out of it.

KathleenB
KathleenB
13 years ago

I’m in it for the mocking, myself. I have to keep my smartass skills honed somewhere when my character isn’t mouthing off to her Caern Alpha in out Werewolf game.

Actual quote from the game, after the Wyrm’s eye appeared (it’s a sign of the game world’s apocalypse):

Alpha: Fuck me sideways.
Me (one of the lowest ranked member of the Caern who the Alpha could eat for breakfast): Thanks for the offer, but you’re really not my type.

There was almost a minute of stunned silence from the GM and the rest of the table.

KathleenB
KathleenB
13 years ago

dear gods, my kingdom for a spell checker that can ferret out my stupid assed typos! That should read OUR Werewolf game, not OUT. Two hours of sleep, I has it.

Wetherby
Wetherby
13 years ago

That reminds me of the time when both my wife and a senior colleague had a favourite phrase that went “fuck a duck!”.

With my wife, I’d respond with a strangulated quacking sound, as though an entirely innocent duck had been suddenly assaulted from behind while minding its own business. With my colleague, of course, I said nothing.

Apart from the time when I forgot.

Fortunately, she saw the funny side.

Seraph
Seraph
13 years ago

Kathleen – were you a ragabash? If so, you could probably avoid getting killed too much if you could claim “Just doin’ my job”.

hellkell
hellkell
13 years ago

I feel we have reached a troll equilibrium here, where Brandon will continue to be ridiculous and we will continue to mock him.

I’m ok with that, though I too wonder exactly what he gets out of it.

If he wants to keep digging, I’m more than happy to hand him the shovel.

Amphitrite
Amphitrite
13 years ago

I really hate to use anecdotal information again, but hey, I’ve had an exciting (though obviously mythological to most MRAs) life. I’m not one Julie mentioned that gets to talk about what a hypothetical situation abuse is.

How’s this one? Let’s go with the frog metaphor.

At one point, a few years ago, my brother and I found ourselves in relationships that had heated up past “warm water” to a good “roiling boil” of abusiveness; him with his fiance, me with my husband.

Both relationships had started out normal enough to BE a relationship. As time passed, both our partners grew territorial, then possessive, then uber critical, until physical force got played in.

Get that? A male using violent physical force against a woman (me) and a female attacking a male (my brother). We watched responses to our similar situations side by side.

For my brother, people were both outraged and embarrassed when he talked about it. Embarrassed that a big, adult male would not only admit to getting physically and emotionally battered by a female, but that it was traumatic enough to cause him distress. Outraged, ’cause, hey abuse.

For me, a similar reaction, outrage – check, but with a dash of “But you guys are the best couple EVER! Counseling! Men get stressed!”

We both fought opposition to ending the relationships. We were lucky we had each other to lean on, to understand. We jumped out of the proverbial pot rather than get cooked. We both carry some nasty burns.

It really isn’t about gender. It’s no more about gender, than it should be about race, orientation, socioeconomic level, personal experience/knowledge, or religious or non-religious belief.

Does my brother hate women or blame the whole gender for a sucky experience? Nope.
Do I hate men, etc? Nope.

Are we both aware of the poison of abuse. Hell yes. The end.

Amphitrite
Amphitrite
13 years ago

Oh, and we didn’t kill them. Oops.

KathleenB
KathleenB
13 years ago

Seraph: Sadly, no. Our group seems to have mixed up our roles. My Galliard is playing Ragabash, the Ragabash wants to be an Ahroun to fit in with the cool kids, and the Ahroun seems to be channeling a Theurge. Of course, this is a game where we had to have some sort of battle, supervised by the Master of the Challenge before a spirit would help us. We did rock, paper, scissors. My galliard composed an epic sonnet upon her victory and will recite it at the next Moot, and the not very bright spirit will forever tell the tale.

Amphitrite
Amphitrite
13 years ago

Sorry for the wall o’txt, but just to be clear, I’m not in any way demonizing people who get so stuck in that nightmare that survival tops reason. It would have been so much worse had I not had someone to turn to.

Seraph
Seraph
13 years ago

@ KathleenB: That sounds hilarious. Every time I’ve ever played Werewolf, it’s been in “mixed-world” games with vampires and mages and stuff in the party, so we never got much of a chance to really explore Garou culture.

@ Amphitrite: Don’t worry about either the wall o’ text or the content. It didn’t sound like you were demonizing anybody. It’s good that you got clear, it’s good that you (and your brother) had help, and it’s good that you’re bringing some reality to the proceedings to counter Brandon’s endless hypotheticals.

Brandon
Brandon
13 years ago

@Kirby: I didn’t leave in a huff…I went to bed. That whole “work in the morning” thing. Also, I think the emotion I mostly feel around here is mild amusement.

@Pecunium: And you attack me for reading comprehension. Let’s begin shall we:

You said:

“So yeah, you are saying, GOOOOLLLLLD! as if that will magically make things better (even though it did no such thing in the past.”

In response to these two paragraphs you quoted::

“In the end, the main problem is fiat money. Money that only derives it’s value from some intangible abstraction like “full faith and credit” is a poor way to handle monetary policy. This is why gold prices are increasing. More and more people have “less faith” in the US govt and how it manages it’s money and finances. So people are trying to maintain their purchasing power by being long gold and other metals.”

and…

“The gap between gold and a growing economy is similar to the gap between our floating money circulation and the amount of wealth of the US. The wealth of the US is much higher than the actual money that is floating. In fact, unless you want to kill the economy, you can’t have more dollars floating that are worth more than the wealth of a country.”

Let’s start with the first one:

1) The first sentence pretty much sums up my problem with the current monetary system. It’s not so much that I am a gold bug…but that i think fiat currency is susceptible to lots of swings in value because a lot of it’s value is derived from how people “feel” about the economy. Even if facts show the US government is able to pay it’s bills, all it takes is the perception that the US is growing insolvent to damage the dollar.

I am more anti-fiat currency than pro-gold. So if you have another system that isn’t fiat or gold based, I am more than happy to hear that argument.

The second paragraph:

I wasn’t even talking about gold…I was talking about the gap between floating fiat money to US wealth. The money supply and the wealth of a nation are two completely different things. And tons of people use them synonymously which is incorrect.

@Hershele: You said:

“What about a man sleeping who has said “when I wake up from my nap, I’m going to kill you”?”

That means she has even MORE incentive to get away from him ASAP. She could wait and if he was “honest” she would be accepting her own death by staying there.

If someone said to me “I am going to kill you in the morning!”…then I am going to get as far away as possible, contact the police and if it was serious ask the police to place me in protective custody.

@Kristin: Mock me all you want…it doesn’t really bother me. I think people that resort to mocking are amusing. So I could always have a few more laughs.

Nova
Nova
13 years ago

@ Brandon: Protective custody? You really think that the police do that? In the reality that the rest of the world lives in, they *might* arrest the abuser and, in some states, they hold the person until after their arraignment, if there are even charges to be filed. As for the victim, that’s what DV shelters are for. If there’s space available. If not it goes back to the notion that couples know eachother well and know where their spouses friends and family live.

VoiP
VoiP
13 years ago

If someone said to me “I am going to kill you in the morning!”…then I am going to get as far away as possible…

Think fast: you have three children under ten and if the littlest one’s routine is fucked up, she’ll start crying.

Or the person who plans to kill you has also hidden the car keys and the phone.

mythago
13 years ago

Also, I think the emotion I mostly feel around here is mild amusement.

But of course. “Who cares if I’m full of shit. I go around with a mild feeling of contemptuous superiority over all of you, so nyeah.”

Wetherby
Wetherby
13 years ago

@Brandon:

That means she has even MORE incentive to get away from him ASAP. She could wait and if he was “honest” she would be accepting her own death by staying there.

If someone said to me “I am going to kill you in the morning!”…then I am going to get as far away as possible, contact the police and if it was serious ask the police to place me in protective custody.

You may not speak English. You may not know anyone outside your immediate family and relatives, who may have already sided with your partner. You may have very young children. You may not be able to drive, or have access to the car keys, and live miles away from any public transportation. So where the hell do you go?

Several people have made points like this to you over and over and over again, yet you continue to ignore them. Which speaks volumes in itself.

darksidecat
13 years ago

Um, how are you supposed to leave the house when the other person is there, watching you, fully intending to kill you or your kids if they see you trying to leave?

Yeah, the imminence of that threat would be a slam dunk self defense case with anyone other than a partner/spouse who was doing that sort of shit to a person.

Pecunium
13 years ago

Brandon: Let’s boil this down:

You believe a floating currency is bad, yes or no?

If the answer to that is yes (which it appears to be) then we have to ask; you think a commodity based value for currency is good, yes, or no?

Because all the rest, is blather. If you think the latter (which you have said you do) you are saying GOOOLLLLLLLLD!!!!!!

All the rest is persiflage.