Jezebel has apparently decided to gin up some page views by running a bizarre, victim-blaming, slut-shaming, skeevily prurient screed on Amber Cole, the 14-year old African American girl who was videotaped giving oral sex to some boys; the video got posted online and, despite the fact that it was, you know, child porn, went viral. The story itself is appalling; so is the screed, written by a guy pretending (for rhetorical effect) that he’s Cole’s father. It reads like something you’d find on The Spearhead.
The piece starts off melodramatically:
I am Amber Cole’s father. I am angry, confused and completely at a loss. I love my daughter. I want to guide her without suppressing her. That is not always easy. Children need protection from their worst inclinations. That is not always easy. I am trying to convince her that the world will still love her if she keeps her clothes on.
Just to remind everyone again: the author is not actually Cole’s father. (And Amber Cole is apparently not her real name.)
The screed quickly descends into an attack on the girl’s mother that reads like something you’d read in the comments section of The Spearhead or In Mala Fide:
She would listen to her mother, if her mother was not busy. Doing something, anything that is not parenting. I want her mother to spend less time being “empowered” and more time being aware and engaged with our daughter.
And it only goes downhill from there. We get a section essentially blaming girls at large for the incident, because they allegedly ignore the “nice guys” who would never make such a tape. We get a section blaming the “mother’s boyfriend, Karrine Steffans or Kim Kardashian” for teaching the girl to be “proficient at such a difficult act. … I want to know why my 14 year-old knows so much about oral sex.”
And then we get a ridiculous race-baiting rant about white feminists and the Slutwalks:
White feminists can teach their own little girls to find empowerment through their crotches – my brown little girl cannot afford to be that carefree and cavalier with her life choices. Slutlife is the hard, lonely vocation of rich, educated, privileged white women who will fuck The World, contract social diseases and still, somehow find a husband. No black woman ever got far being a slut. I want to know what kind of women “slutwalk,” while young impressionable girls of all kinds look on with wonder and admiration.
After placing blame for the whole thing on just about every girl and woman in the world, the author comes to the father:
I am Amber Cole’s father. Don’t ask where I was that afternoon, because you already know. I was at work, just like you. I do not live with her, cannot always talk to her, cannot always be there. Not the way I want, and there are few laws to help me. To protect me and my rights.
Because that’s the real issue here: Father’s Rights.
And then the big reveal:
I am Jimi Izrael. I am not really Amber Cole’s father. But she is my daughter.
You do not think so. But she is your daughter too.
Go read the whole thing. It’s appalling. Then read Jeff Fecke’s takedown of it on Alas, a Blog.
Ironically, Jezebel ran an excellent piece on the subject about a week ago.
WTF, Jezebel? Are page views really that important?
EDITED: I reworked a bit about the (real) father that I originally formulated badly.
100 million tween girls and their moms can’t be wrong…
Ugh… and the fact that this just came as a surprise to me means what? That’s it does not hold true for everyone (especially people who are NOT tweens).
If you look at many of the actors/singers/whomever that grown women gush about you won’t find many aficionadoes of Bieber.
I’m pleased as punch that you can see the difference. I’m just so used to seeing people conflate “good-looking” and “ass-hole.” Good to know that wasn’t your intention.
…you know what, Broseidon? You’re right. They’re clearly okay with you (and originally MRAL, looking back over the thread) deciding what we talk about. Yet again. Duly fucking off now. Don’t count this as a flounce yet, as I’ll be back later in the hopes the conversation has moved back into territory we haven’t covered a million times, but if it hasn’t, you may add one flounce to your scorecard and I’ll see y’all in another thread.
Seraph, your point is a good one. But it would also be fair to point out that Broseiden and MRAL’s need to discuss who won’t date them dovetails pretty precisely with Jimi Izrael’s piece in the OP. He also used the public humiliation of Amber Cole to talk about women who don’t date nice guys.
So there’s that.
so is amber cole definitely not her real name? I’ve felt uncomfortable following the story at all because the last thing the girl needs is more attention and more people looking her up. if thats not her real name then it’s at least a lil better. and yeah, way to bait page views Jezebel. It kinda sucks, I enjoy Jezebel but sometimes the getting things wrong on purpose (so it seems) thing is too much…
and this guy is just deplorable apparently he also has a book called “the denzel factor” about black women not being able to marry cause their standards are too high… sounds pretty MRA-ish to me. I feel like when guy complain that women expect too much or something they’re basically just saying “wait, these bitches want us to be NICE to them? and RESPECT their feelings? uppity bitches!”
I own up to being a part of the derailing…sorry :<
Truth be told, as sad as it is, the OP doesn't even surprise me anymore. Blame the victim, blame the parents, blame the media, blame feminism…never blame the people doing the raping/videotaping/coercing though. Its gotten to the point where it feels like this shit is never gonna change.
I just assume that every comment after about #30 will be a derail.
In a way I’m almost grateful for it, when the OP is sickening (as it usually is). Much easier to deal with “no, dudes, you don’t get a gift-wrapped woman (guaranteed gorgeous, loyal, and submissive or your money back) dropped on your doorstep just because you were born male.”
Because that’s an evergreen subject, and there’s really only so much to say about “if a boy films a girl having sex and the boy sends the video to everyone, the boy is the asshole here.”
It would. Guess it always comes back to that, doesn’t it? “Those bitches deserve it for not fucking me…I mean, people like me.”
True Fax, Holly.
I say again – why is Amber Cole the only victim here? It’s not here real name, and unlike the boy she was not exposed. The boy is just as much a victim, even moreso I’d say. And yet I haven’t heard a SINGLE PEEP about him.
More female privilege.
So… I want to know, how can we report the person who wrote the article and who confessed to watching pedo porn?
Because sure as hell that’s wrong. I find it disgustin how grown men want to have access to the pants of underage people and the law should be strict. There is no gray line there.
I am sick and tired of this attitude of people who think that other people owe them sex or access to bodies, because they have dicks.
I really think that either they should start using their heads and according parts as human being or suffer the consequences.
Also incorrect. You say “all the gals,” but you’ve made it clear in your descriptions that you’re actually only talking about “hot” women. The rest of women are invisible to you. Which proves my earlier point exactly. Attractive women are told that they are required to go out with average men, otherwise they’re stuck up bitches. Attractive women are also the only ones you’re talking about when you make sweeping generalizations about the terrible things that “all women” do.
Sorry, I contributed to the derail before I read the second page. Done now.
You know what’s really getting to me?
Everyone who thinks the problem is “a 14-year-old girl gave a blowjob.” Like that’s the scandal here.
Christ.
I think Alas, a Blog covered the territory well.
I’m glad to hear that the real dad and the authorities are taking this seriously. Now why did YouTube take so long to respond? They seem kind of trigger happy when Big Media starts looking their way…
On a side note, I wonder how Anonymous is dealing with this since they were doing the whole Child Porn hacking/publicizing.
That’s been bothering me, too. The most important part is how it completely erases our budding little sex criminals, of course, but I’m also wondering if anybody who thinks this remembers 14. Granted, a year or two counts for a lot at that age, and the two kids are a little bit ahead of the curve (assuming the blowjob itself was 100% consensual, which we can’t assume), but not really by that much (as Jeff Fecke pointed out). Were all the people clucking their tongues about this really that different, or are they just self-righteous with distance?
Re: Pittclones
When I was in high school, I used to hang out with this kid who had a similar face shape (and jawline in particular) to Brad Pitt. He (the kid, not Brad) was a self-centered little asshole, and also happened to be gay. Because of him, I now associate that jawline with both of those traits, which makes Brad Pitt completely unattractive to me. That’s not to say that homosexuality in itself is unattractive, but the part of my brain that goes “yum, that guy is hot” does short out as soon as I find out said guy is gay. I think of it as a defense mechanism, since I’m female and therefore a gay dude would not be interested in me. It also works on assholes, which makes the Brad Pitt look a double turn-off. (Stricly appearance-wise, I tend to be more attracted to guys with longer, narrower faces, high cheekbones, and long hair. Make of that what you will. Being about the same height as me (around 5’4-5’6″ or so) and having broad shoulders also get you bonus points with me.)
Aww, I wanted to talk about Pittclones, but I took too long typing. Mostly I just don’t want to think about either the video OR the article, because both are pretty gross. 🙁 Did you see the comment he posted to defend himself? Ew.
You are making assumptions about women that are way too generalized. Do you realise that?
Yes, some women say “I want a guy who is nice, funny, and intelligent” and they really do mean it. They also want someone “who is someone I find attractive physically.” But that should be without saying.
Broseidon – SPOT ON. That’s really the root of the problem. Teh wimminz who say they like nerds – well, maybe they do, but only nerds that are, appearance-wise basically translated functions of classical jocks – f(Pitt+glasses) as opposed to those “shallow women” who will only accept f(Pitt). It’s a fucking joke.
I’m sure some women do find intelligence a turn-on. Maybe even nerdiness. But their vision of a nerd is Clark Kent, not the reality, which may even lack a 500-pack (gasp!)
Elizabeth: The problem is when they imply that “nice, funny and intelligent” is the number one priority, when in fact looks are the first priority, with the niceness, funniness and intelligence being a nice bonus. They just phrase it this way because they don’t want to seem shallow. Guys do the same thing, by the way, so I’m not excusing them. They claim to want smart, funny girls but don’t add “and of course she has to be attractive”. The whole thing can be confusing and more than a little disheartening to people who are, in fact, nice and funny and smart but rate low in the looks/social graces department. In other words “She said she likes nerds, so why is she ignoring me and dating the hot guy who wears vintage glasses ironically?”
Broseidon – How many of the “women claim they want this, but really they want that!” incidents involve the same woman?
There’s no one thing that all women (or all men! speak for yourself) want.
Yes, women don’t find standard manly men attractive anymore. That’s why the last barge to Ugly Island left with Hugh Jackman, Ryan Reynolds, George Clooney, Viggo Mortenson, and John Hamm on board! Justin Bieber will be taking over the role of Don Draper, per public demand.
I’ve read a bit about this since David posted this. The details are still murky to me and I don’t have the stomach to try to find out more. I’ve read everything from it was the girl forced by three boys, it was the girl and her boyfriend with his friends taping them, it was the girl trying to win back an ex-boyfriend by fellating him and letting his friends tape it. I don’t know. I’m hoping that it was consensual for her sake not rape (not taking NWO’s word for it), but assuming having it out on the internet wasn’t with her consent.
In Kave’s defense, when I read the first (the girl force by three boys), I thought back to my roommate when I was a college freshman. She told me of how a boyfriend who was in a gang had her initiated into it by forcing her to have sex with him and four other boys. From what she said, it’s a fairly common way of initiating girls into gangs. I don’t know how true this was or is, since I’ve led a sheltered life. FWIW, we’re both white, coming from rural areas in the southeastern US.
My take on Jezebel is that it is sometimes feminist, but not consistently so. And that the editors love playing devil’s advocate from time to time, thus their decidedly non- even anti-feminist posts. Not my favorite site by a long shot.
I hope the best for the girl. I hope she has family and friends who protect and help her deal with this.