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Jezebel channels The Spearhead with an odious piece on Amber Cole

Jezebel has apparently decided to gin up some page views by running a bizarre, victim-blaming, slut-shaming, skeevily prurient screed on Amber Cole, the 14-year old African American girl who was videotaped giving oral sex to some boys; the video got posted online and, despite the fact that it was, you know, child porn, went viral. The story itself is appalling; so is the screed, written by a guy pretending (for rhetorical effect) that he’s Cole’s father. It reads like something you’d find on The Spearhead.

The piece starts off melodramatically:

I am Amber Cole’s father. I am angry, confused and completely at a loss. I love my daughter. I want to guide her without suppressing her. That is not always easy.  Children need protection from their worst inclinations. That is not always easy. I am trying to convince her that the world will still love her if she keeps her clothes on.

Just to remind everyone again: the author is not actually Cole’s father. (And Amber Cole is apparently not her real name.)

The screed quickly descends into an attack on the girl’s mother that reads like something you’d read in the comments section of The Spearhead or In Mala Fide:

She would listen to her mother, if her mother was not busy. Doing something, anything that is not parenting.  I want her mother to spend less time being “empowered” and more time being aware and engaged with our daughter.

And it only goes downhill from there. We get a section essentially blaming girls at large for the incident, because they allegedly ignore the “nice guys” who would never make such a tape. We get a section blaming the “mother’s boyfriend, Karrine Steffans or Kim Kardashian” for teaching the girl to be “proficient at such a difficult act. … I want to know why my 14 year-old knows so much about oral sex.”

And then we get a ridiculous race-baiting rant about white feminists and the Slutwalks:

White feminists can teach their own little girls to find empowerment through their crotches – my brown little girl cannot afford to be that carefree and cavalier with her life choices. Slutlife is the hard, lonely vocation of rich, educated, privileged white women who will fuck The World, contract social diseases and still, somehow find a husband. No black woman ever got far being a slut. I want to know what kind of women “slutwalk,” while young impressionable girls of all kinds look on with wonder and admiration.

After placing blame for the whole thing on just about every girl and woman in the world, the author comes to the father:

I am Amber Cole’s father. Don’t ask where I was that afternoon, because you already know. I was at work, just like you. I do not live with her, cannot always talk to her, cannot always be there. Not the way I want, and there are few laws to help me. To protect me and my rights.

Because that’s the real issue here: Father’s Rights.

And then the big reveal:

I am Jimi Izrael. I am not really Amber Cole’s father.  But she is my daughter.

You do not think so. But she is your daughter too.

Go read the whole thing. It’s appalling. Then read Jeff Fecke’s takedown of it on Alas, a Blog.

Ironically, Jezebel ran an excellent piece on the subject about a week ago.

WTF, Jezebel? Are page views really that important?

EDITED: I reworked a bit about the (real)  father that I originally formulated badly.

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zhinxy
10 years ago

Bonus points if your theories can explain to zhinxy why anarchism is such a frickin’ sausage fest sometimes.

Sniper
Sniper
10 years ago

Budmin now speaks for all dudes? What a time saver!

Budmin
Budmin
10 years ago

Please delete my last comment. What I meant to say is that “I could understand prosecution of the wrong doers. I am more focused on prevention.”

Furthermore, This situation is as close to a MRA Boogie Man as one could imagine. It will be exploited. It all goes back to how much freedom you give to your child before they hurt themselves.

BlackBloc
BlackBloc
10 years ago

@zhinxy: I would say, for the same reason pretty much every subculture out there is a sausage fest. Fractal patriarchy, you find it no matter at what zoom level of society you’re looking at. 😉

Holly Pervocracy
10 years ago

Bonus points if your theories can explain to zhinxy why anarchism is such a frickin’ sausage fest sometimes.

Because of how many young anarchists take pride in acting like Tough Guys, thus making young women feel unsafe and unwelcome around them!

Anyway.

This situation is as close to a MRA Boogie Man as one could imagine. It will be exploited. It all goes back to how much freedom you give to your child before they hurt themselves.

I don’t think it’s an MRA boogeyman until everyone involved is falsely accused of rape.

In fact, since it involves the exploitation of a girl, maybe MRAs should stay the fuck out unless they plan to stick up for her.

And no, you can’t just deny freedom to children. It’s neither physically possible nor psychologically advisable to make it impossible for them to film others having sex and share the video without their consent. (That is the bad decision you’re talking about, right? Good.) You have to actually teach them that it’s wrong.

cynickal
cynickal
10 years ago

Cuz that’s what men do we defer to authority..okay..

The Patriarchy hurts men too. And everytime you use a double period a Youtube video dies.

cynickal
cynickal
10 years ago

Bonus points if your theories can explain to zhinxy why anarchism is such a frickin’ sausage fest sometimes.

For the same reason many anarchists I know never get to the “enlightened” part of “enlightened self interest”?

Fatman
Fatman
10 years ago

Men’s Rights Activist Lieutenant, what do you mean by “female privilege” and how was it on display when those boys decided to distribute child pornography? Is it your contention that the 14 year old girl in this situation was at fault for the boys decision to distribute a film of their encounter?

Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
10 years ago

No, I’m just stating the fact that if women didn’t teach each other to be entitled arrogant pricks who judge men based solely on attractiveness, money and other external qualities, this kind of stuff will happen more often. Because assholism is not a turn-off. It’s simple logic.

Holly Pervocracy
10 years ago

Yeah, MRAL, none of this would have happened if she’d given oral sex to an ugly guy!

…What in the living fuck are you saying?

Also, a little exercise for the next day when there isn’t freezing rain: go to the park, or a mall, or some place a lot of people gather. Observe all the couples. (All of them, like the ones with old people and ugly people and gay people too. Any two people who appear to be together together.) Observe how many of them don’t include a Pittclone. Reflect upon this.

Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
10 years ago

Another thing – why is Amber Cole the only victim here? There was a boy whose penis was exposed, that’s more than Amber Cole showed.

More female privilege, we don’t even THINK about feeling for the boys.

Shaenon
10 years ago

I will never understand how some people get to be this self-absorbed. I mean, who reads a news story about a child being sexually humiliated and thinks, “Hmm…how can I turn this into an opportunity to whine about how I didn’t get enough dates in high school?”

And that’s it for me ever reading Jezebel again.

Shaenon
10 years ago

Oh, wait, I just read MRAL’s post. Let me amend my previous comment:

I mean, who reads a news story about a child being sexually humiliated and thinks, “Hmm…how can I turn this into an opportunity to whine about how I don’t get enough dates at BU?”

Dracula
Dracula
10 years ago

Misandry and female privilege hurt everyone, and this is a textbook example.

So a fourteen-year-old girl being sexually exploited is “female privilege”? What fucking planet are you on?

“…because assholism will be considered a negative trait, rather than a neutral one.

Asshole males being favored over others (to the extent this is actually true) is a function of male privilege, you dolt.

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

MRAL, exactly how does your datelessness tie in with the OP? It doesn’t, you say?

Moewicus
Moewicus
10 years ago

I think MRAL is just constantly trying to beat his high score in the game of “make a comment completely disconnected from reality that still blames feminists for shit.”

Congrats MRAL, you’re at 1006, a new high.

zhinxy
10 years ago

Hah! Well, I was asking jokingly, but yes! Yes! All of the above and very much more and “I CAN’T BE SEXIST, I’M AN ANARCHIST”

I particularly love “fractal patriarchy,” blacbloc. 😉

Cynical:

“The Patriarchy hurts men too. And everytime you use a double period a Youtube video dies.”

Just as I read that, I went to a favorite youtube video only to find “removed by the user!”

IT’S ALL TRUE!

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

I think MRAL is just constantly trying to beat his high score in the game of “make a comment completely disconnected from reality that still blames feminists for shit.”

He’s playing against NWO & Meller if that is indeed the game.

savagebeard
savagebeard
10 years ago

Why is this the Amber Cole video? The boys were the ones exposed.

When I first read this, I thought it was an excellent feminist statement. Then I realized that he was coming from way, way, way far afield of where I thought he was and I lost balance for a second. Back on solid ground now, but disappointed.

Seraph
Seraph
10 years ago

I don’t know what you’re going on about with the “men love authority” thing but I suspect a lot of the men you’re speaking for would like you to stop it.

*Raises hand*

Spearhafoc
10 years ago

So, a 14 year old girl is filmed giving oral sex, the video is distributed all over the Internet, and MRAL’s main problem with this whole situation is that the dudes involved were probably too good-looking.

makomk
makomk
10 years ago

Jezebel has pretty much always been like this, including some really questionable victim-blaming rape apologist articles by the regular female editors. (Those would presumably fall outside your remit though.) I’m surprised they even let comments calling them out on it through; when it’s one of the editors writing something questionable they haven’t tended too.

Budmin
Budmin
10 years ago

zhinxy says:

Can you expound on just what you mean by this? If you mean that there’s a culture of “manliness” that’s very hieriarchal in our society, sure. But I don’t think most men would consider themselves to be an “Authoritarian” explicitly, or even unconsciously. I genuinely want to hear more about your perceptions in this area.

@Zhinkxy – Hierarchal in values yes but to some degree Authoritarianism promotes longevity of life, mental health & cultural cohesion through uniformity and respect for the laws of causality. 

“Work hard or starve to death”
“Save it for Marriage or be considered a slut”
“Don’t have sex and you won’t get pregnant”
“Spend your money wisely or go broke”

I’ve always said Men won’t Respect anything that can’t Whopp their Ass”. It seems that young women are following that same Mantra.

That’s my definition of Authoritarianism having a full knowledge & respect for consequences.

That’s all I’ve got to say…

Seraph
Seraph
10 years ago

That’s all I’ve got to say…

Good.

Shaenon
10 years ago

MRAL, honey, assholism is considered a negative trait. That’s why you can’t get a girlfriend.

Sometimes–not always, but sometimes–the universe works justly after all.

(Also…you’ve watched the video and the kids look like Brad Pitt? Really? “River Runs Through It” Brad Pitt, “Fight Club” Brad Pitt, or “Moneyball” Brad Pitt?)

Seraph
Seraph
10 years ago

Am I the only one hoping the law lands on the boys with both feet for producing child porn? It’s entirely possible – kids have gotten busted producing child porn of themselves before (usually by sexting to a boy or girlfriend).

red_locker
10 years ago

*facepalm*

Honestly, what can I say that hasn’t been said?

And I see the regular trolls are swarming around this on our comment thread, plus the general comments in Jezebel are awful. This Jezebel article really IS a pile of shit. 😉

katz
10 years ago

He’s playing against NWO & Meller if that is indeed the game.

And Rev “toddlers attacked by pit bulls” Spinnaker.

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

I thought it was Rev “children tossed to pit bulls like Christians to lions” Spinnaker. Eh, potato, potahto.

Alpha Asshole Cock Carousel
Alpha Asshole Cock Carousel
10 years ago

When women ride the cock carousel till the cows come home, valuing looks over literally everything else – even integrity – this will happen

Yup, and I get downright sore waiting for those cows to come home. Believe me, once they’re home, I’m kicking back with a hot toddy giving my roosters the rest of the day off. Fair closes at sundown anyway.

kristinmh
kristinmh
10 years ago

Shaenon, what about “Kalifornia” Brad Pitt?

Can’t get enough of the “filthy serial killer” type!

(MRAL, that was a joke. In case you trip over your massive IQ and get confused XD)

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
10 years ago

I found a perfect song for MRAL and friends.

Women seem wicked when you’re unwanted, indeed.

Arielle Shander
10 years ago

Wait, isn’t Jezebel a feminist site? I’m confused…

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
10 years ago

@Arielle Shander:

As far as I know, yes. But unfortunately feminists are not perfect… -_-

Rutee Katreya
10 years ago

Yep, they are! And this is why we need to be ready to say “HEy what you said is stupid, here is why”.

Myoo
Myoo
10 years ago

Ok, this Jimi Izrael guy is just utter and completely horrible. I think it’s been fairly well covered why he’s so horrible, but I just had to say it anyway. I hope he gets sued for slander.

Myoo
Myoo
10 years ago

Actually, I think it’s libel, but whatever.

And yes, I know he “acknowledged” he’s not actually the father, in a tiny, barely imperceptible sentence at the end of the article. well, whoop-dee-doo, he still misrepresented himself and the situation to promote his own hideous ideology.

TK
TK
10 years ago

Oh god, that guy needs to go eat a bag of dicks. Funny how he didn’t feel compelled to write an essay about his I imaginary sons, the ones participating in the sex act, taping it and distributing it online.

OSHIII
OSHIII
10 years ago

So, what’s more offensive to the outraged non-relatives online? That the girl is engaging in sexual activity, or that somebody violated her rights and secretly recorded her having sex, then shared the video online?

Yeah.

Pecunium
10 years ago

Budmin: Hold the phone.. Holly Pervocracy Put your troll gun back in the holster. I like most dudes would consider myself to be an Authoritarian.

Speak for yourself.

NWOslave
NWOslave
10 years ago

@Holly Pervocracy
“Empowered” means “having power.” It means being able to make one’s own decisions and put them into effect.”

And that’s exactly what she did, made her own decision and put it into effect. She wasn’t coerced, she wasn’t raped, she wasn’t forced in any way. Enthusiastic consent all the way. In fact, enthusiastically initiated.
——————-
@hellkell
“I read that piece yesterday and wondered where the hell I was.”

Feminist Amerika.
——————-
@Amnesia
“This is a sex video of a 14 year-old. It’s child pornography and it’s illegal.”

As if 14 year old girls aren’t banging out videos/pictures themselves and posting them online. Shouldn’t those girls be locked away as well? Or are they victims?
——————-
@girlscientist
“He called the cops on them, like a real father would, like I’m sure my father would have done if I’d found myself in the same situation.”

Yea right. I can hear the conversation now. “Hey daddy, I was sucking off a bunch of guys, which I volunteered to do. Shouldn’t they have known better?” I’m sure daddy will commend his little girl for her responsible actions.
——————-
@amused
“The boys on the other hand are given a pass because they are boys.”

No. If that was the case it would’ve been a video of a boy carpet munching a bunch of girls.
——————-
@Holly Pervocracy
“I don’t think it’s public knowledge even which parent or parents she lives which, much less details like her mom being too “empowered” and her dad shut out of her life against his wishes.”

I’ll bet we can take a wild stab at the home life situation.
——————-
@Hershele Ostropoler
“I don’t know about fathers specifically, but yes, if the boys who put the video on the internet had been properly brought up, this wouldn’t have happened.”

Those darned boys. If only they’d been properly raised, none of this would’ve happened. It’s all their fault.
———————
@Holly Pervocracy
“Because of how many young anarchists take pride in acting like Tough Guys, thus making young women feel unsafe and unwelcome around them!”

Ya mean anarchists are bad too? Anarchists, MRAs, conservatives, on and on it goes. It seems as if only feminists and communists are good. Hey! Since sluts are da bomb of modern womanhood, why not write up an article on your precious blog praising her strong, independent, responsible ownership of her sexual agency. Think of it as a feminist mission to teach all little girls to fuck and suck as often as possible, and break the stereotype of slutshaming. Not with overaged men of course, but enthusiastically with younger men.

Just out of curiosity, since feminism is all about equality. How come the gang is gushing with sympathy for the young lady for societies yucky treatment but not the boys? A case in point would be this sopping comment on Jez. More love for women she so tenderly advises but not a peep of equality for men.

“It also pains me to see that, once again, they’ve forgotten that feminism isn’t just for women. It’s for college fraternities & boyfriends & fathers & uncles & grandpas, too. It’s for any man who knows that there are better ways to love & value & nurture women in this society than we have been & that’s what I took away from this post. “

zhinxy
10 years ago

I… don’t think Holly has a problem with anarchists at all, I think she was just responding to my joking “if guys are naturally authoritarian, why is anarchism such a sausage fest?” question.

And that’s exactly what she did, made her own decision and put it into effect. She wasn’t coerced, she wasn’t raped, she wasn’t forced in any way. Enthusiastic consent all the way. In fact, enthusiastically initiated.

I have not seen this video, and never intend to, but from what I understand, that is not at all clear. Also, even if she consented to the act, that doesn’t imply consenting to the video.

Your little fantasy of tons and tons of 14-year-old girls making all sorts of sexy sex tapes and putting them on the internet (as opposed to sending them privately to boy/girlfriends, if it happens at all) is just another peek into the very creepy world in your mind, where young girls do nothing all day but taunt and flaunt and tease.

Also, are you ever going to answer me about the proper role and functions of the State in your worldview? Sometime, eh?

Seraph
Seraph
10 years ago

And that’s exactly what she did, made her own decision and put it into effect. She wasn’t coerced, she wasn’t raped, she wasn’t forced in any way. Enthusiastic consent all the way. In fact, enthusiastically initiated.

Not what we’re hearing. And even if true, the child pornography thing remains.

As if 14 year old girls aren’t banging out videos/pictures themselves and posting them online. Shouldn’t those girls be locked away as well?

Some of them have been. Make you feel better?

Those darned boys. If only they’d been properly raised, none of this would’ve happened. It’s all their fault.

Yep.

Pecunium
10 years ago

Budmin: @Zhinkxy – Hierarchal in values yes but to some degree Authoritarianism promotes longevity of life, mental health & cultural cohesion through uniformity and respect for the laws of causality.

Is there a conversion application available to translate this into something in a coherent language?

“Work hard or starve to death”
“Save it for Marriage or be considered a slut”
“Don’t have sex and you won’t get pregnant”
“Spend your money wisely or go broke”

1: Paris Hilton
2: No. Almost no one is a virgin on their wedding night. Most people aren’t called sluts*
3: Birth Control**
4: tautological, or irrelevant. Lots of broke people spent their money wisely. Lots of people spend their money foolishly (see 1), and are not broke because they have so much it would be damned near impossible to run out.

Moreover, none of the “good” results of the things you think are involved in the dualistic flip-side of your arguments, lead to long life, mental health or cultural cohesion.

I don’t think you really grasp causality.

*Moreover, slut is a gendered insult. Men who have sex with lots of women (not just the one required to break the rule of, “save it for marriage” which you say = slutdom) are not condemned at all.

** Again, a gendered “rule” as men can’t get pregnant.

BlackBloc
BlackBloc
10 years ago

>>Because of how many young anarchists take pride in acting like Tough Guys, thus making young women feel unsafe and unwelcome around them!

Anecdotes aren’t data, but that time we protested Human Life International and the coppers started making trouble by pounding that Pink Panther kid with a spray can onto the pavement, it was three young women who showed me just how fast you can turn a sign into a weapon by stripping off the cardboard from the 2×4 with your foot. Blink and you miss it.

Just saying.

Love and solidarity to the anarfem sisters. 🙂

Unimaginative
Unimaginative
10 years ago

I thought it was Rev “children tossed to pit bulls like Christians to lions” Spinnaker. Eh, potato, potahto.

Nah, it’s Rev “children thrown to pit bulls by the malnurturing matriarchy” Spinnaker.

zhinxy
10 years ago

Anecdotes aren’t data, but that time we protested Human Life International and the coppers started making trouble by pounding that Pink Panther kid with a spray can onto the pavement, it was three young women who showed me just how fast you can turn a sign into a weapon by stripping off the cardboard from the 2×4 with your foot. Blink and you miss it.

Just saying.

Love and solidarity to the anarfem sisters.

Hah! In my young Refuse and Resist days we got impromptu pre-police-brutality protest advice and instruction in quick sign-to-weapon conversion from a lovely middle-aged schoolteacher! Ah, the memories.

Ami Angelwings
10 years ago

As I recall, Jezebel also has published other probematic pieces that you’d think were written for the Spearhead in the past as well… the one w/ the guy who tried to justify not getting consent and something about how European women don’t make a big deal about sexual assault comes to mind >_>

so basically… if a girl does something ppl look down on, we all know that the mother is to blame, and the father would have fixed her but he’s too busy working? o_O What if a girl does something ppl like? Then it’s despite the mother I guess XD

wtf >_>

Ami Angelwings
10 years ago

Ya mean anarchists are bad too? Anarchists, MRAs, conservatives, on and on it goes. It seems as if only feminists and communists are good. Hey! Since sluts are da bomb of modern womanhood, why not write up an article on your precious blog praising her strong, independent, responsible ownership of her sexual agency. Think of it as a feminist mission to teach all little girls to fuck and suck as often as possible, and break the stereotype of slutshaming. Not with overaged men of course, but enthusiastically with younger men.

Do you even know what “da bomb” means? xD You have enough trouble knowing what “xD” means… xD

You do know that there are anarchists here right? Arguing w/ you? xD

And why did you say feminists AND communists? xD I thought they were one and the same xD You’re slipping o:

Luckily we’re recording all the hilarious things you believe so we can remind you! Silly NWO, you believe feminists ARE communists remember? XD

And if you’re so concerned that Holly isn’t addressing things you think should be addressed, maybe you should start your own blog? :3 After all, you clearly have the time 😀

Kave
Kave
10 years ago

I have a huge issue with a 14 year old girl deciding to give blow jobs to multiple boys as her own choice given a choice.

I going to go out on a limb here that this was some kind of gang initiation (have not seen the video) akin to what happens to boys who have to jump in (beaten up by the gang members).

If given a choice in life I know any boy would not choose to be beaten to become a member of a gang but it happens. Assault is illegal but we all know that the police tend to turn a blind eye.

Girls are fucked in as gang members as guys are beaten in. Maybe the police need to stop allowing both to happen?

(Again I have not seen the video but I know that way to many young people see no other way then joining a gang no matter what the cost)