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Cosmetics: An evil plot to fool the men of the world into thinking that ladies are pretty

Evil female deceiver at work

Ladies! You may think you’ve got the men of the world fooled, but the guys over on MGTOWforums.com can see right through you! As dontmarry puts it:

Everything that a woman does is deceitful. From makeup, push-up bras and high heels, to fibbing about her dick count or proclamations of ‘I don’t mind marrying a poor man’ (oh yes you do).

That’s right, ladies! We know those eyelashes aren’t real! We know your cheeks aren’t really that rosy! And your lips aren’t really that red! And your boobies aren’t really … um, what was I saying? I got distracted thinking about boobies. Anyway, you’re all a bunch of liars! I bet some of you even wear Spanx, which are a tool of Satan.

Also, that thing he said about the dick count. Stop the lies! We demand dick count accuracy!

 

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Spearhafoc
13 years ago

MRAL, these numbers you make up are arbitrary. One person’s 2 in another’s 10.

Just so I understand your metric, what is Christina Hendricks on your scale?

She’s my celebrity crush; a definite 10, if I were to assign numbers (which I usually don’t, because it’s arbitrary and pointless). I recall you saying her breasts were too big. I disagree. Strongly.

What about Kristen Schaal? I think she’s funny, cute and whip-smart. She’s definitely up there for me. Something tells me you wouldn’t agree with my assessment.

Doesn’t the fact that we two men disagree invalidate the whole ranking system?

Molly Ren
13 years ago

Actually, MRAL, here’s something you might be interested in looking at:

THE MUSEUM OF FAT LOVE

Sometimes, the woman is fatter. Sometimes, the man is. Sometimes (gasp!) they’re BOTH fat! And yet, somehow, they’re in happy relationships!

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

Are you questioning MRAL as not being the centre of the universe, Spear? xD

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

@Molly those aren’t humans >_> Stop trying to trick MRAL.

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

Another of NWO’s lies:

he’s not really back

XDDDDD

shaenon
13 years ago

All of the bitches need to understand one simple rule: If you keep yourself unfat and if your face is not absolutely hideous, you’re golden.

You don’t even believe this yourself. There was a previous thread where you complained that unattractive female singers don’t get insulted for their looks nearly as much as you’d like. Your list of “ugly” singers consisted of Lady Gaga, Amy Winehouse, and… I forget who the third one was, but I bet she wasn’t fat or hideous-faced either.

Hershele Ostropoler
13 years ago

ozy:

Rutee: A famous ancient Greek logical paradox is that of Epimenides, a Cretan, who said “Cretans always lie.” Pan was doing his updated version by claiming he was more deceitful.

Thank you. If only I’d posted the quote, or linked to the relevant Wikipedia page.

Sharculese
13 years ago

this thread suddenly reminded me of marine research’s ‘glamour gap,’ which i cant find a video for on youtube so…

I’ve never been one of those girls
With perfect legs and head of curls
And 90 minutes every day
Spent making themselves that way

In Selfrdige’s, you see them graze
On beauty creams and AHAs
And liposomes to keep the skin
From cracking up and giving in

Acting like I’m just me
Acting like that should be enough
Isn’t where they’re at
Everything else I see
Everything else I do
There’s always a glamour gap

I’ve queued for loos with Dahni Behr
She sucks her cheeks, so debonair
Like Barbie, plastic, head to toe
And me standing all aglow

I sometimes try to imitate
These women who exfoliate
I paint my lips all kinds of reds
I wax my insect-bitten legs

Acting like I’m just me
Acting like that should be enough
Isn’t where they’re at
Everything else I see
Everything else I do
There’s always a glamour gap

magdelyn
13 years ago

Dicks…in the low 100+

Vaginas…low 40’s

That’s not counting any professional services I may or may not have provided.

Molly Ren
13 years ago

magdelyn, are you trying to bait NWO too? He tends to go into meltdowns when you talk about specific numbers of partners. 😀

cynickal
cynickal
13 years ago

I once wore football gear and feathers. What punishment do I deserve?
I also work make up like The Crow. Now I have to hide my face in shame. 🙁

Molly Ren
13 years ago

cynickal, it’s only a problem if you didn’t also wear leather pants.

Bostonian
13 years ago

I have only had one partner, in my whole life. We are very compatible, so I am content. I lucked out a great deal.
I am not cut out for high numbers of any kind.
For those with more partners, I admire your energy!

kristinmh
kristinmh
13 years ago

Wait, am I in a dick-measuring contest with MRAL over who’s shorter?

5’2″ is pretty short even for a woman, dude. You know how there are whole sections in women’s clothing stores called “petites” (i.e., clothes for short women)? Those pants are still too long for me. But I learned how to sew, so now I hem them up myself, and I got used to using step stools to reach the top shelves of things, and I got over it.

I know you feel like your (perfectly normal) height is a major handicap in the world, but think about it this way: you don’t have to ask a stranger at the grocery store to get something off a high shelf for you.

Always look on the bright side, kid!

Molly Ren
13 years ago

“How is 5’2 short? Fucking ridiculous”

MRAL, what is with you this evening? You say you’re *5’8* and call *yourself* short! It’s like you’re claiming 5’2 is TALLER than 5’8!

jumbofish
13 years ago

hey MRAL I just realized you are taller than me!

Trust me 5’8 isn’t short…not that you care.

BigKitty
BigKitty
13 years ago

I guess Paniorpa is too busy pretending to be the Manboobz version of Michel Houllebecq to answer. . . alas, if only he realized that he’s just not that interesting. . .

Skyal
Skyal
13 years ago

Kristen, I just gave up on hemming. I roll all my pants up now. Which is kind of a pain, but I have no one to pin for me, since hubs can’t get on & off the floor easily (medical issues, and the poor dude is 6’8″. But at least I have someone to reach the shelves!) I’ve decided that “petite” doesn’t mean what they think it does. I’ve never found anything in that section short enough (I’m 5′)

cynickal
cynickal
13 years ago

cynickal, it’s only a problem if you didn’t also wear leather pants.

Sadly, they are in need of repair.
I had to make do with the studded leather thong.
The city of New Orleans is still recovering…

Sharculese
13 years ago

@skyal

i roll a lot too. it helps that for the 3 months we have cold weather down here i mostly wear corduroys, which look a lot less weird rolled than most pants

katz
13 years ago

I’m 5’2″ and I don’t recall ever having trouble finding clothes that fit. High shelves, though, yes (and obnoxious people who can’t help commenting any time they see you standing on a chair to reach something, no matter how many times they’ve seen you do it before).

Rutee Katreya
13 years ago

How is 5’2 short? Fucking ridiculous

You’re .50 inches under average height and you’re going to complain that someone who’s a little on the wee side says they’re short? Can you be more of an asshole, MRAL?

All of the bitches need to understand one simple rule: If you keep yourself unfat and if your face is not absolutely hideous, you’re golden. There is no pressure

Because you would know, right?

I have a friend who works in a pretty upscale environment. She gets harped on for wearing too little makeup by her coworkers, as if she were some sort of hairy legged feminist. She spends 300 dollars monthly on makeup, and work is the primary place she wears it, spending ~3 hours weekly on it for work. This is the low end, for women in the middle class, I’m given to understand.

Oh, and she’s not working in customer service or sales. She’s a programmer. They’re just legendary for their care for hygiene and looks, right?

Remember, 3s fuck male 8s and 5s fuck male 10s.

Statement assumes facts not in evidence

I really have no idea, given all this privilege, why so many of them are so God Damn Insecure with the makeup and shit.

The fact that you’re full of shit and have no idea what the fuck you’re talking about *really* helps.

Eurosabra
Eurosabra
13 years ago

I wouldn’t say deception, but I did have to exercise non-stop performative masculinity to stay in a relationship (provide the $, the plan for any date, the location and impetus for any sexual activity) and all this while dating women who, like me, dated very infrequently and only one person at a time and had dated very few (5 or fewer) individuals over the course of their lives. I am short (5’5″) and I have a couple visible disabilities, so it’s not unusual that even with PUA I had to approach 50, 100, 200, 300 women–the “cute girl of the day”–in the course of a year to get ca. 10 solid first dates. So I would agree with NWO, any average woman who approaches men or who is approached by them can pretty much find someone to say “Yes” on any given day. I do feel that the issue of “deceit” is a form of tone-deafness, these seem to be at least partly matters of personal taste, and many an omega (David Alexander of La Grande Anse blog for example) has fetishized an artiicial Pr0n Valley aesthetic.

PS Holly Pervocracy, I did find your fet life commentary on that unsolicited message from random anonymous fister hilarious.

Rutee Katreya
13 years ago

PUA actually decreases your chances amongst most women, except the most misogynist of them. You’re not helping yourself, bro.

I find it hilarious that someone from the community that calls women of sufficiently low attractiveness ‘Warpig’ is now going to tell us that any woman can find someone who’ll say yes. Sure. Pull the other one, it plays Through The Fire and the Flames.

Snowy
Snowy
13 years ago

I roll the cuffs of pretty much all my pants now that I think about it. Either that or wear chunky shoes so they’ll stack. And 5’2 is pretty of short. But wait, is that your morning height or your evening height? It makes a difference you know!

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