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antifeminism reactionary bullshit reddit

Yeah, well you’re a big meanie!

He's planning to bite you.

Comment of the day, from an angry antifeminist in ShitRedditSays who seems a bit obsessed with, if confused by, the sex lives of animals. Well, two comments, actually. The first:

It’s hilarious how reliably the feminist creature will resort to insulting a male’s sexuality. When cornered, it is like a vicious weasel, scratching at the only vulnerability it knows, in desperation of its wretched circumstance.

What’s even more hilarious is how likely it is that you all have the sex lives of a fucking snail.

And a followup:

I am no more concerned with a rancid female supremacist’s opinion on my sanity than I would be of a goldfish’s perspective on the world outside its bowl. You live a twisted, fucked up existence, devoid of reason and love. Your whole world is consumed by hatred of men and society, justifying your dementia by paddling about with other complete mental cases in this joke subreddit, all of you thoroughly skull fucked by evil rabid animals that pollute our universities under the guise of “professors” of various social “science” gibberish.

Um, why exactly would an evil rabid animal (even a vicious weasel) want to skull-fuck a rancid goldfish, even assuming it could? Wouldn’t it just go around biting everyone? I would, and I’m not even rabid.

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Wisteria
Wisteria
9 years ago

A little after the wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton, I got off the boat and went to one of the links (can’t remember which website). The commenters there were having a discussion of the alpha- or beta-ness of Prince William. Now, I would assume a man who is young, healthy, educated and a competent pilot, very famous and rich, and probably going to be a king would automatically be an alpha. But no, many of the comments were that he’s a beta, partly because of the role he was born into, partly because of his own choices of marrying a woman his own age and not being a player. The comments concerning Kate were about what you’d expect. I guess a quarter of the comments which mentioned her approved of her good looks, slim figure, and education. But three quarters of them ridiculed her for her age (too old for William at 29, and five months older than he is!), not being pretty enough, small breasts, and way past her prime.

If Prince William isn’t an alpha, what man could be?

luke123
luke123
9 years ago

But no, many of the comments were that he’s a beta

Strange. I would have thought it was an example of the ‘hypergamy’ thing: A woman wanting to marry someone of higher status than herself.

Brandon
Brandon
9 years ago

@Societal: Aw…good ole’ Roissy. Mostly, I find him amusing. Some of his stuff is funny and other posts are down right disgusting. I tend to treat him as if he was an off-color comedian.

The whole PUA scene just seems like a marketing campaign to me. It just takes “be confident, don’t be clingy and lose the fear of talking to women” and just repackages it and creates a bunch of jargon around it…like “kino”. It’s touching…not kino.

Also, I do wonder why women and feminists are talking about this more and more. They say that the methods used by PUA’s don’t work. Well if they don’t work, then men will stop using those methods over time. If I kept on using the same stupid “pick up lines” over and over and over without getting any results (i.e continuing a conversation, making a date, etc…) then why would I continue to use it?

So if the PUA’s are wrong…then the scene will just die out because their methods don’t work.

I always wondered why lots of women are always bringing up commitment. Why should I commit to someone I am sleeping with? Why can’t both parties just enjoy the sex without trying to wrap it all up in a relationship? Why is commitment so important to women?

Also, I didn’t really care if the women I was sleeping with were sleeping with other people. I just enjoyed the time spent with her and tried to stay in the moment as opposed to making “future plans”. I like to keep things light and easy.

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
9 years ago

I always wondered why lots of women are always bringing up commitment. Why should I commit to someone I am sleeping with?

Brandon, why is commitment so important to men? I mean, you don’t have to travel far in the MRA/PUA/MGTOW manosphere to find a lot of anxiety about women a cheating. A lot. And when fidelity, and our perceived lack thereof, is not being directly referenced many of these men are expressing a great deal of anxiety about the notion of women having a sex life prior to being with them. On these threads we’ve seen self-identified MRAs maintain that a woman with prior romantic/sexual relationships has proven herself incapable of loyalty.

So, again, why is commitment so important to men? Why should a woman commit to someone with whom she’s sleeping?

Societal Contract
Societal Contract
9 years ago

“Therefore, the only thing for a man to do is go around screwing the youngest girls allowable and dumping them before they get the chance to wise up or develop an adult body shape.”

What the….?!?!?!?!?!?

luke123
luke123
9 years ago

Woman ask for ‘commitment’ because that is what the romantic love myth tells them is what they are expected to do. They think that if they would just say ‘I’m horny, let’s fuck’, people would condemn them for being sluts.

The whole PUA scene just seems like a marketing campaign to me.

It is.

Bagelsan
Bagelsan
9 years ago

They think that if they would just say ‘I’m horny, let’s fuck’, people would condemn them for being sluts.

Now where would women get an idea like that? :p

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
9 years ago

Woman ask for ‘commitment’ because that is what the romantic love myth tells them is what they are expected to do. They think that if they would just say ‘I’m horny, let’s fuck’, people would condemn them for being sluts.

Luke123, people do condemn women for being sluts when we have sex outside of committed relationships. This happens, literally, every day. A few days back NWO had an absolute nuclear meltdown and called a regular poster a “fuckhole with a pulse” because she blogs about kinky, enthusiastic sex.

But thanks for presenting your thoughts (such as they are) on why women want commitment.

Why do men want commitment?

ozymandias42
9 years ago

I don’t even know what “looking for commitment” means. If I find someone I want to have a relationship with, I’ll have a relationship with them. If I find someone I want to have casual sex with, I’ll have casual sex with them. I don’t want a relationship, any more than I want a friendship; I want to be in a relationship WITH someone I love.

Societal Contract
Societal Contract
9 years ago

Brandon, commitment is important to those who are looking for it from specific people. YOU ARE NOT NECCESSARILY THE ONE.

Why do these men have a fear of telling a woman they are attracted to, “look, I like you. We vibe well together and I’d like to see you more but I’m not looking for exclusivity so if you’re into us having an open relationship…. lets rock forward!”

But these guys don’t do that.

Women respect honesty FROM THE START. Not when you’re halfway into it.

Just assume that many people – male and female – might possibly want a commitement from someone, not neccessarily YOU. So if you’re dating people, make it clear that you are not one of those into commitment and see where things go.

What’s wrong with that?

luke123
luke123
9 years ago

“Why do men want commitment?”

Same reason. It’s the same romantic love myth. The princess is supposed to make the prince go through a whole lot of ordeals or she is not worth having somehow.

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
9 years ago

Ozy, I’ve never sought out a committed relationship, either. I remember that “Why You Don’t Have a Boyfriend” list the “super honest” guy version written by that Frost idiot on Walsh’s blog and the way he opened with something like: “If you want any shot at having a guy be semi-serious about you…”

Who runs around thinking about relationships that way? I mean, I know there are people who do and it’s hardly gender specific. But I’ve never approached it that way. It’s very “cart before the horse” you know?

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
9 years ago

“Why do men want commitment?”

Same reason. It’s the same romantic love myth. The princess is supposed to make the prince go through a whole lot of ordeals or she is not worth having somehow

So men, want commitment because they’re worried that people will call them “slutty” if they have sex outside of a committed relationship? Because, you know, that would be the “same reason” as why you assert women want commitment.

And the second part of your statement has nothing to do with men or commitment at all.

luke123
luke123
9 years ago

‘So men, want commitment because they’re worried that people will call them “slutty” if they have sex outside of a committed relationship? Because, you know, that would be the “same reason” as why you assert women want commitment.

And the second part of your statement has nothing to do with men or commitment at all.’

Personally, I never asked wanted ‘commitment’ nor asked that. I can’t speak for those who want that. The only thing I can come up with is ‘social conformity’.

Brandon
Brandon
9 years ago

@Societal: I never said I was “the one”.

Why do you put the responsibility on the man to tell you? Isn’t it YOUR responsibility to evaluate the relationship and see if it is the direction you want it to go in? If he is acting all easy-going and carefree and you want something serious…doesn’t that behavior tell you that he might not be “the one”? Try being proactive instead of reactive.

You are also making the assumption that men should think women want a commitment “by default”. And you want men to tell you as soon as possible so you don’t waste time on him. You basically want men to screen themselves out of your “potential sex partner” box.

While I might not use those exact words, I do inform the women I am with that I am in it “to have fun and not looking for anything serious”

Also, I think it is a little disingenuous to say that men are flat out lying (or dishonest) because we don’t just “mind dump” everything about us to you in the first week of knowing you. Trust has to be established first before I even open up to a woman. And there are a few things that I will never tell a woman (or anyone else for that matter).

elusis
9 years ago

“Man, those bitches will insult your sex life at the drop of a hat because it’s the only argument they have.

“I will now proceed to insult their sex lives.”

What’s that delicious buttery smell? Is that… irony?

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
9 years ago

Personally, I never asked wanted ‘commitment’ nor asked that. I can’t speak for those who want that. The only thing I can come up with is ‘social conformity’.

If you think people seek commitment because of “social conformity” why were you referencing a fear of slut-shaming and “princesses” making men “jump through hoops?

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
9 years ago

Brandon, one question:

You are also making the assumption that men should think women want a commitment “by default”

Brandon | September 11, 2011 at 2:14 pm

I always wondered why lots of women are always bringing up commitment.

Brandon | September 11, 2011 at 1:29 pm

Do you have whiplash?

Societal Contract
Societal Contract
9 years ago

Why do men want commitment?”

Same reason. It’s the same romantic love myth. The princess is supposed to make the prince go through a whole lot of ordeals or she is not worth having somehow

NOPE. Not the section of men I’m talking about. They want commitment from women but don’t want to give it in return. The guys at Roissy are wrangling their heads over whether or not they should even DATE a woman because they don’t want to “ruin” her and make her bitter for the next beta guy when they dump her after 3 weeks to chase new tail.

Someone suggested “how about proposing to the woman an open short term relationship?”

Their response? “Ewwwwwwwwwww…. that means she’d be seeing other guys as well as me?”

luke123
luke123
9 years ago

“If you think people seek commitment because of “social conformity” why were you referencing a fear of slut-shaming and “princesses” making men “jump through hoops?”

These are all part of the romantic love myth that underlie the social rules that are conformed to.

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
9 years ago

I see. So the “romantic love myth” and “social conformity” are the same thing? Or are they intrinsically linked?

Societal Contract
Societal Contract
9 years ago

Brandon, I’m not putting the responsibility entirely upon the man. I’m responding to the attitude of the men at Roissy’s blog under the “leaving her better than you found her” topic, who’s underwear is in a bunch over whether or not to date a woman when you just want a short term non-commital relationship with her.

They are throwing out the following options:

1. Don’t do it. Every little chip away at her heart makes her more bitter for the next guy.

2. Do it. Pump and dump women mercilessly. They are always “lets just be friends”-ing their beta orbiters.

A binary option.

Guess what? Buddha says there’s a middle path:

JUST BE HONEST AND SAY YOU WANT A SHORT-TERM NON-COMMITAL RELATIONSHIP where BOTH are free to date other people.

PROBLEM SOLVED.

If she’s looking for commitment right now she’ll move on, and if she wants to date you in the interim till she finds someone else, she will.

What are these dudes afriad of?

luke123
luke123
9 years ago

“I see. So the “romantic love myth” and “social conformity” are the same thing? Or are they intrinsically linked?”

They are linked. But probably not the the whole story. There is also the ‘sex is only allowed in a monogamous marriage, and only for procreation’ thing. And the ‘getting a woman to have sex with me is something that validates my existence as a man’ thing.

Holly Pervocracy
9 years ago

Anyone who claims to be immune to social pressure is an arrogant shithead… and a liar if they’re bothered that I said that.

Brandon
Brandon
9 years ago

@Nobinayamu: No because that only says that women talk about commitment but that doesn’t explain why commitment is important to them. Basically what makes you (or any other female commenter here) value commitment?

IMO women tend to talk, discuss, complain about commitment or why their boyfriends are not committing to them far more than men even discuss commitment. In fact most of the conversations about commitment I have had with men is in reference to my the man’s girlfriend wants him to commit to her.

@Societal:Are you talking about the article or the commenters? In the article Roissy describes a situation where men reach a junction point in the relationship and have to think about what options to take:

1) Date her
2) Lie to her and sleep with other women
3) Be honest and tell her you sleep around
4) Break up with her and start dating again

Then he gives a list of situations that would force the man to make the decision:

– he found a hotter girl
– the full extent of her horrid personality came to light
– she gained weight or suffered facial disfigurement from an accident or attack (hey, it’s a cruel world)
– he is bursting with ball juice and can’t go more than three months without sampling new pussy
– a hotter ex came back into his life
– he cheated and decided leaving her was preferable to staying with her in penance prison, offering his manly dignity as sacrificial lamb
– he just got plain tired of banging her and needed his single life back
– he moved far away, or she moved far away
– she started pressing him to move the relationship forward
– he caught her cheating

Personally, I agree with the headline of the article . Breakups suck for both parties so the idea of “Leave her better than you found her” is just PUA’s trying to justify their methods.

The subtext to this is that people get strung along. Men string women along and women string men along. The whole point is if you don’t like getting strung along, then be aware of it, then leave.

As an example: If I keep on taking a girl out on dates and it isn’t moving forward, then I don’t make dates with her anymore. She obviously doesn’t want what I want so I don’t waste my time.

I also find the “men are just afraid of X…” meme funny since it is often incorrect.

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
9 years ago

@Nobinayamu: No because that only says that women talk about commitment but that doesn’t explain why commitment is important to them. Basically what makes you (or any other female commenter here) value commitment?

IMO women tend to talk, discuss, complain about commitment or why their boyfriends are not committing to them far more than men even discuss commitment. In fact most of the conversations about commitment I have had with men is in reference to my the man’s girlfriend wants him to commit to her.

Brandon, you assumed that women want commitment, by default, and then chastised Societal Contract for assuming that men are assuming that women want commitment by default. You chastised her for the very thing that you did a half hour earlier.

Your attempts to backtrack and re-frame your position are shoddy, if admirable, but c’mon. If you don’t have whiplash, you should at least be a little dizzy.

You’re asking why so many women want commitment because in your experience women talk about commitment all the time. Fine. I don’t know what kind of women you hang out with; it may be true. In my experience it isn’t true. I also offered examples of men who discuss commitment a lot. Why do they do that?

Why are so many men so interested in commitment?

Societal Contract
Societal Contract
9 years ago

“Personally, I agree with the headline of the article . Breakups suck for both parties so the idea of “Leave her better than you found her” is just PUA’s trying to justify their methods.

The subtext to this is that people get strung along. Men string women along and women string men along. The whole point is if you don’t like getting strung along, then be aware of it, then leave.”

The whole point is to make it clear from the get-go, “hey i don’t want to string anyone along so lets not commit and just enjoy each others company for now and see where it goes.”

Societal Contract
Societal Contract
9 years ago

Brandon asked me:

“Are you talking about the article or the commenters? In the article Roissy describes a situation where men reach a junction point in the relationship and have to think about what options to take:

1) Date her
2) Lie to her and sleep with other women
3) Be honest and tell her you sleep around
4) Break up with her and start dating again”

I’m talking about both the article and the comments that ensued. In my mind its a non-issue provided you tell her early on that you are not wanting to commit and the relationship, if it proceeds, will be an open one from both ends.

The reason Roissy and party are opposed to that is because they don’t want to sleep with a woman who is simultaneously sleeping with other men.

For some reason that really gets their goat.

Brandon
Brandon
9 years ago

@Societal: How am I supposed to know that…if I just met her. She could be a woman I just want to date or she could be “the one”.

You are asking men to define the relationship when there is practically no relationship to define.

Nobinayamu: No I said that women place a higher value on commitment than men not that they want a commitment “by default” from every person they are dating.

I have been apart of many conversations between men and women and women tend to bring it up and spend more time talking about it. I rarely come across men that discuss commitment in length. It’s like finding a woman that can regurgitate sports statistics…a rare find.

I can’t really answer your question because I see little value in commitment and I rarely hear men express their opinion on the matter. If they do value it…they aren’t talking about it…at least with other men.

Societal Contract
Societal Contract
9 years ago

They weren’t talking about first dates there, Brandon. The Roissyites were talking further along in the dating sequence when they were knew the woman wasn’t “the one” but they still wanted to keep dating and sexing her – while simultaneously looking for new tail.

The dilemna was:
be an ass and keep dating her while secretly seeing other women which would hurt her if she found out
OR
dump her

No option of “open relationship”

Again, what is it about open relationships that scare men so? I experienced the same in my own life. Husbands would rather risk divorce and losing their kids in cheating than have an open marriage wherein their wife is also seeing other men.

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
9 years ago

Oh for the love of little kittens and the big dogs that chase them. Really Brandon?

-Brandon, last night

No I said that women place a higher value on commitment than men not that they want a commitment “by default” from every person they are dating.

-Brandon, yesterday afternoon, prior to being called on his shit

I always wondered why lots of women are always bringing up commitment. Why should I commit to someone I am sleeping with? Why can’t both parties just enjoy the sex without trying to wrap it all up in a relationship? Why is commitment so important to women?

Brandon, among other things, you said “Why is commitment so important to women?” Again, your back-pedaling reframe is not going to work. Maybe you genuinely meant that women care more about commitment than men do (in your limited experience) but what you actually said literally translates to an assumption that wanting commitment is the default position for women in, or seeking, relationships.

Then you got your shorts all bunched up when Societal Contract made an argument that men should be honest about not wanting a commitment early in a relationship:

…You are also making the assumption that men should think women want a commitment “by default”…

Solipsism of your arguments aside, the jumping off point of your rebuttal is replete with, if not intellectual dishonesty, an appalling inconsistency. And, frankly, it makes you hard to take seriously. Acknowledge that you didn’t say what you meant and then clarify your position. Or defend your initial argument and then explain why you contradicted it later. But pretending that you didn’t say it is basically telling me that I can’t read. And while it’s true that I can’t read your mind, I am functionally literate.

Molly Ren
9 years ago

“Solipsism of your arguments aside, the jumping off point of your rebuttal is replete with, if not intellectual dishonesty, an appalling inconsistency. And, frankly, it makes you hard to take seriously. Acknowledge that you didn’t say what you meant and then clarify your position. Or defend your initial argument and then explain why you contradicted it later. But pretending that you didn’t say it is basically telling me that I can’t read. And while it’s true that I can’t read your mind, I am functionally literate.”

Nobinayamu, Brandon’s problem that basically *all* his arguments end up like this if they go on long enough.

Pecunium
9 years ago

It’s true: He complained to me that he didn’t say all of the benefits of of marriage could be duplicated.

This, of course, isn’t true. What amuses me is that we can remember what he said so much better than he can. That tells me he either doesn’t really think we pay attention, or that he is not managing to say what he means.

The latter is fairly common, but rather than clarify his meaning (which would require the admission that he made an error, even one so trivial as misstatement of his intended meaning) he has to double down and tell us he didn’t say it.

Which is silly because it’s all there, waiting for the person who is patient enough to go back to confirm what they recall.

Brandon
Brandon
9 years ago

@Societal: Most men are too chicken shit to ask for an “open relationship” for fear of offending their girlfriend. They make the assumption that women only want monogamous relationships.

Men need to learn that women aren’t everything. Women are just a piece of life and men should branch out and not let their girlfriends/wives consume all their time. This is the attitude that a lot of men have. Living in fear. Thus, they are scared of asking her to be in a poly relationship because he might lose her. They think by asking her for an open relationship, she will storm out, call him an asshole for suggesting it and tell him to never call her again. He would rather have a girlfriend then none at all. Bad thinking on his part.

I don’t really know or care if women want or don’t want commitment. I make it perfectly clear that our relationship is “light and fluffy” and nothing too serious. I think I have done my due diligence and if she continues to call, talk, text and generally wants to spend time. That is her approving of what I said. Otherwise, she would go find someone else.

Lastly, I asked “Why is commitment so important to women?” not that it was my belief. But to see the answers other commenters made.

VoiP
VoiP
9 years ago

Men need to learn that women aren’t everything. Women are just a piece of life and men should branch out and not let their girlfriends/wives consume all their time. This is the attitude that a lot of men have. Living in fear. Thus, they are scared of asking her to be in a poly relationship because he might lose her. They think by asking her for an open relationship, she will storm out, call him an asshole for suggesting it and tell him to never call her again. He would rather have a girlfriend then none at all. Bad thinking on his part.

It’s OK for men to manipulate women, to hurt them by forcing them to be in non-exclusive relationships when they don’t want to be. This is all just fine with you. Does it bother you that the man in this scenario is making someone suffer, another human being, whose feelings are (presumably) more or less similar to his? Or is all that matters here that he gets called an asshole?

I don’t really know or care if women want or don’t want commitment. I make it perfectly clear that our relationship is “light and fluffy” and nothing too serious. I think I have done my due diligence and if she continues to call, talk, text and generally wants to spend time. That is her approving of what I said. Otherwise, she would go find someone else.

What if you are the only one she wants?

Societal Contract
Societal Contract
9 years ago

Brandon, “Most men are too chicken shit to ask for an “open relationship” for fear of offending their girlfriend. They make the assumption that women only want monogamous relationships.”

I agree. However even when I was the one suggesting it, men have said they prefer monogamy. Even IF they did want polyamory, they only wanted it from their side. The thought of “their woman” seeing other men digusted them. They would much rather be monogamous if polyamory meant she would be poly too.

Holly Pervocracy
9 years ago

I’m actually in an open poly relationship.

However–if I found out that the basis of our relationship was “I don’t care about you enough to be monogamous,” I would be out in a fucking heartbeat. I would call him an asshole.

Poly is about “I love and care about you, and I love and care about my other partner[s]” not about “no darn woman gonna tell me who I’m allowed to fuck!” If it’s something you push onto your partner, or do out of disdain for your partner, it’s got nothing in common with the poly I know.

VoiP
VoiP
9 years ago

I’m actually in an open poly relationship.

I know; I read your blog sometimes.

The difference is, he’s saying something like this: It’s OK for men to manipulate women, to hurt them by forcing them to be in non-exclusive relationships when they don’t want to be.

I don’t think he loves his current partner, I don’t know whether or not he cares if she loves him, and I don’t even know whether he’s open to the idea of loving his partner, at least right now. He’s not even open to the idea of chatting with women who aren’t DTF.

Brandon, I don’t mean to be disrespectful. I’ve felt guilty about the way I talk to people here; even people with complete dickbag ideas are still worthy of respect as humans. But your ideas eat a bag of dicks. Because they cause suffering.

Brandon
Brandon
9 years ago

@Voip: In what sense am I hurting her. I state up front, pretty early in the relationship, that I am not looking for anything serious and I am just looking to enjoy some company and have fun. How is that hurting her? How am I manipulating her? I don’t lay a unwanted finger on her. I don’t force her to stay against her will. I don’t put any pressure on her at all. I say what my position is and she gets to decide if she wants to still see me. Seems pretty honest and open to me.

Also, I care very much for Ashley. Which is the reason that I am in a monogamous relationship with her.

“What if you are the only one she wants?” I don’t even know how to answer this.

eline (formerly a Finnish emigrant, in the process of renaming self)
eline (formerly a Finnish emigrant, in the process of renaming self)
8 years ago

Oh I know it’s an oooold topic but I was reading back and came accross this reference to the sex lives of snails. I can only assume he intended that to mean “no sex lives”, but as a breeder of these little creatures I can assure him that snails get laid a plenty and often around 12 hours in one go, sometimes with foreplay of several hours involving several individuals. Snails are, you see, polyamorous hermaphrodites. And they feel no shame about their sluttiness!

eline (formerly a Finnish emigrant, in the process of renaming self)
eline (formerly a Finnish emigrant, in the process of renaming self)
8 years ago

Haa, I shoulda known there’s snail sexperts on the site, just on the previous comments page! Shame I missed the discussion when it was ongoing… 🙁