From Human Stupidity, an MRA blog rather obsessed with underage girls and the alleged evil of age of consent laws:
[I]f a 15 year old … can decide to have sex with a 16 year old … [h]ow come she cannot have sex with a 35 year old? Age discrimination by law?
Are you worried about manipulation of the tender 15 year old? I have a solution:
what about legalizing sex with underage adolescents, if they first undergo an hour of mandatory counselling and a 2 day cool off period? That should take care of this issue. This would guarantee safety for the 15 year old against being conned or manipulated. More safety that is offered to 21 year old tipsy Friday night party girls who may feel sorry for what they did yesterday
I think he might actually be serious here. Though it’s pretty clear he’d be happy with any excuse to make it legal for 35 year-old men to have sex with 15 year-old girls.
Or join one of the preexisting reproductive rights groups that address issues across the country.
@Lauralot: And how could I possibly help residents of say Nebraska fight for reproductive rights? I can’t vote in their elections nor am I even remotely near them to actually do any meaningful for them. All I can do is support them in spirit. So it’s not a question of “refusing to help” it is more like “I hope they enact that law”.
encourage the president to appoint more pro-choice judges to the federal bench. support increased title x funding. donate to planned parenthood of america.
And no, I’m not saying you HAVE to do those things. But you have a lot more options than “I can’t do anything since I don’t live there.”
Tokyo is my favorite part of Thailand.
but again, reproductive rights arent nearly as secure in your community as you believe. If roe were overturned today, abortion would be legal is massachusetts tomorrow.
so, if youre really serious, and not just making excuses for yourself, you could start in your own backyard
Just that being white doesn’t magically make all your problems go away.
Who’s saying that? o_O
Brandon said: “Good for your husband. But god forbid another man has a different experience. ”
Everyone else has been saying for days: good for you, Brandon. But god forbid another person has a different experience.
Brandon: Defensive? Slightly. I find it insulting when someone just off the cuff tries to make a connection between me and being a pedophile because I mention a desire to move to Thailand. I thought Voip and Bagelsan were genuine progressive feminists…they seem to find it ok to stereotype Thailand as some cesspool of prostitution.
1: Again, no one said pedophile, they said sex tourism, which isn’t, by any means, limited to children.
2: Thailand is a hotbed of prostitution.
3: What is is about the culture which intrests you? The music (I happen to know the director of the Sinfonetta Siam, and he’s doing some amazing stuff, including writing new operas)? The independence (Thailand managed to be the only country not colonised)? The food? The literature? The arts? The local flavor of Buddhism? What?
Also my goal of moving is years off. Who is to say if Ashley and I will still be together. When the goal is within eyeshot, I will bring it up
The time to mention is isn’t when it’s in eyeshot, it’s now. I want kids. It’s not something to mention when the wedding is being planned. There are lies of omission.
Basically Voip is was acting as a narcissist because of the immediate thought that I was moving there because of women.
That’s not narcissism.
Marriage: I don’t think that equality can be obtained when we still have an institution that allows one person to become financially dependent on another.
Still? When the institution was moving a woman from the possession of her father to that of her husband? When the most liberal countries in Europe allowed widows (who didn’t remarry, or take detectable lovers) to keep an iheritance in their own possession?
The aspects of the laws which made it impossible for women to be truly independent aren’t that long gone. My mother, for example, couldn’t get credit cards (in 1974) because she was separated, and needed my father’s permission (which, as she as avoiding contact wasn’t doable).
Child Support: While men should pay child support (hey, it’s your kid). I think some of the payment systems can extract far too much. Also the phase “in the best interests of the child” is far too subjective.
What do you think is fair, and why.
What is “too subjective” about the best interests of the child.
If women walked around as a man, they might see that men have to be careful around children for fear of being labeled a deviant, even when we just want to help. (i.e helping lost children). Or if a man wants to enter a female-dominated area (like day care). He is seen as creepy because he wants to be around children.
Not in my experience. I’ve been both an au pair and on call, primary babysitter. I have siblings young enough that I was thought to be their father (the middle one with pitying looks, the younger ones without the blink of an eye).
Paternity fraud: While this might not happen all that much (stats go from 3 to 30 percent…so not really helpful)
Citations needed.
Title IX: My main concern is that male sports programs are held back because sports rosters have to have roughly the same participants.
There is a whole lot of stuff with male sports (not the least of which is the really big ticket item, football, costs more than it generates, and so is actually harming all but a handful of male students), but that’s such a small part of what Title IX actually does that it’s small beer in the realm of issues.
@Societal: The Japanese seem more tolerate and accepting of having sex and they don’t try and shame it away like a lot of Christians do. Since Christianity and Judaism didn’t make much progress in Japan,
That would be because the eglatarian aspects of Christianity are amazingly destabilising of the social order. Since Japan was, at that point, already a totalitarian state, it wasn’t that hard to suppress christianity (Japan had a system of collective responisibility, and ways of making sure non-locals stood out, the lack of street signs in cities goes back to the 1500s, if you didn’t know where you were, you weren’t supposed to be there).
If I’d been in charge, I’d have nipped that shit in the bud too.
So it’s not that Japan is more tolerant, it’s that what they tolerate is different. As to sex… it’s complicated, which is why there are “female only” subway cars at rush hour, to stop unwanted sexual behaviors.
arghh. i meant illegal, obviously
While we’re talking Thailand, here’s an interesting Thai music blog:
http://monrakplengthai.blogspot.com/
Interesting Thai horror movies:
http://movies.netflix.com/WiMovie/Shutter/70062814?trkid=5446744
http://movies.netflix.com/WiMovie/The_Unborn/70052046?trkid=2011361
Here’s some cat poetry (although it’s not their oldest book of cat poetry)
http://www.koratworld.com/smudkoi.html
And here’s their version of the Ramayana.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ramakien
Indian cultural shit was everywhere back in the day, because all of Southeast Asia was one huge trading network. We don’t think about it as much as we should, but before railroads and cars, water travel was the easiest and most important way to trade.
@Holly Pervocracy:
Oh fuck ass shit. In another part of the same entry (http://human-stupidity.com/stupid-dogma/teenage-sexuality/when-rape-is-not-rape) he justifies the rape of a FOUR YEAR OLD.
I don’t think he’s doing that, but is rather harping on the idea that rape requires penetration, and used several examples of four-year-olds being sexually molested. Of course, if you’re arguing that rape requires penetration, you should avoid using examples of child molestation to try to prove your point…
@voip
thanks, i was kind of curious about the ramayana thing
You could have asked, man; it ain’t no thing :]
@Pecunium: The point was about making the assumption that I was moving there to be part of the sex tourism industry. As if I can’t have sex in the US. Ashley sees to my sexual needs very well.
Prostitution isn’t everything about Thailand and I find it odd that once mentioned some of the commenters jumped right on that bandwagon and started “feeling skived”. I mentioned nothing of sex and Thailand and here were a few people jumping to that conclusion…always expecting the worst of people I guess. Pessimism is a killer.
I answered what I like about Thailand earlier.
The desire to move to Thailand is nothing but a desire and some preliminary research. I have no date set or a way to earn an income while there. If I had some actual concrete data, then you could accuse me of lying…but there is nothing to lie about since there is no data to lie about.
Ok, you don’t think it is narcissism.. How do I explain it better than? I think Voip was making an assumption that men should always take into account women with every decision we make. When I thought of visiting/moving to Thailand the idea of sex tourism didn’t really pop up in my mind. I just saw a country with great food, Muay Thai and fantastic looking beaches.
So what is your point on Marriage? What does your mother not able to get credit cards affect marriage today? My point is by definition dependency and equality are mutually exclusive. One can not be equal and subordinate at the same time.
Child support shouldn’t make people destitute which has happened to a few of my family members.
“In the best interests of the child” is the most vague, infinitely changing phase. Everyone has different beliefs in what is in the best interests of a child. This is why we have so many different parenting methodologies. What one person might see as in the best interests, another might see as detrimental.
It’s like using “irreconcilable differences” in divorce. It basically means everything and nothing at the same time.
While overall my interactions with children has been fine…there have been a few where parents over react and start yelling at me. I once tried to help a kid find his mother in a department store…when he pointed her out on the other side of the store. I walked him over and without saying a word she went off on me saying crap like “what the hell do you think you are doing?”. I wanted to say “I don’t know…returning your child to you.”
If this behavior happens enough it has the potential to cause a chilling effect.
Ya, it’s late man so I am not going to hunting for a bunch of links but you can Google “site:.edu paternity fraud” to start. Here is one from The Crimson at Harvard:
http://www.thecrimson.harvard.edu/article/2003/5/19/preventing-paternity-fraud-by-luke-smithpthe/
It mentions an advocacy group mentioning paternity fraud at 30%. I also liked the idea of proving paternity as opposed to presuming it. Again, stats are all over the place so it’s pretty hard to nail down a fairly accurate percentage.
Just because the sports aspect is just “small potatos” doesn’t mean it isn’t important. I agree that men and women should have equal access to education and activities surrounding schools. But I don’t like the idea that if only 10% of women want to play sports and 20% of men want to play that 10% of men are forced to go without. Seems like heavy handed government regulation to me.
Japan didn’t just take an isolationist attitude towards outsiders…they were xenophobic about western influences being accepted in mainland Japan. It wasn’t until Matthew Perry opened up Japan to foreign nations and trade. This sheltered Japan from the influences of western religions.
The Japanese address system hasn’t changed much. Major streets have names but secondary roads don’t. I often got lost in Tokyo because I was so used to streets having names…so it was interesting trying to figure out how to navigate the city.
Japan is not without it’s problems and train gropers are one of them.
Brandon: You make absolute, blanket statements. I point out that said statements are wrong based on my own experience. Yet somehow I’m in the wrong here? Funny.
@KathleenB: I am not saying that your experience is wrong…just that it is not the only experience.
“Indian cultural shit was everywhere back in the day”
Hold on, what do you mean by Indian cultural “shit”?
Brandon, I don’t see what Christianity or Judaism has to do with it. In the US there are many devout Christians and Jews, and there are even more “cultural Christians” and “cultural Jews” – meaning those religions have a long history in their family tree and they celebrate Christmas or Hannukah but don’t neccessarily believe in the folklore and mythology of those religions, and STILL Americans are quite open and “shameless” if you will, when it comes to sex.
Aside from a minority of extremely religious or extremely sexually conservative people, I’m not seeing the “shamed over sex” phenomena in the States. If anything I see the opposite.
So what is the approach to sex in Japan? Are parents A-OK if their teenage kids want to have a romp in the sack with their boyfriend/girlfriend before homework and dinner, while the parents patiently wait in the living room?
Do Japanese religions like Shinto and later Buddhism not say anything about controlling the passions?
@Pecunium, “That would be because the eglatarian aspects of Christianity are amazingly destabilising of the social order.”
That’s what Christian missionaries like to tell Indians. However, when they convert the same caste system prevails within the Indian Christian church!
Brandon: And I never said that my experience is universal. That was you. You keep saying shit like your experience is the only one on earth that matters, and you get bitchy when you’re called on it.
Oh please! You do realize these teams are competitive and don’t take all comers, right?
“I’m not some sort of nymphomaniac” is the closest to accurate. It’s not narcissism if you don’t think you’re involved. VoIP said nothing to indicate she thought she was involved.
And no, she thought *YOU* were a manipulative jackass who was perfectly willing to abuse third world folks because he had his. Not actually very contrary with the general evidence we have of you
I don’t actually care that you know nothing about the place but you could try not painting yourself as particularly knowledgeable when you’re not.
You don’t get it at all. You really don’t. You don’t get this choice thing we keep going on about. If a couple wants to arrange itself such that one parent is the primary caregiver, the only way for them not to have dependence is for the government to pay that mother or father for the work (and it is work, make no mistake about it). Maybe that’s the ideal solution, I don’t know. But so long as there’s good reason to have one parent devote the majority of their time to the kids, there’s going to be people who want the couple to be structured such that someone does. And we need to protect the caregivers in the event of divorce.
You would have to make nobody ever want to raise their own children for what you actually want (alimony) to go away. From my perspective the issue is a feminist one only in that so many women are pressured into making the ‘choice’ of caregiver.
You… jackass. Usually nothing bad happens, but on a few occasions a parent was a jackass? Are you trying to be stupid? THIS is the totally not-understandable thing that is your evidence that men aren’t permitted near children?
And this from the asshole who says he can just say no to all social pressure ever. Jesus fuck, you are just amazing.
This is so cute. You think this is why they’re open about sex. Tell me, you are aware that the US it one of the most sexually repressed countries amongst the richest, yes?
Then don’t just offer one randomly. A quick search reveals that the median is 3.7% inaccurate testing, in general and 26.7% when disputed parentage is the reason specifically for the test. That isn’t, however, evidence itself of fraud. You guys do know that word means something, right? Fucking MRAs, even when they have an actual issue they can’t help but try to pull misogynistic idiocy.
Here’s the thing: I’m reasonably positive that this is primarily an issue for the poor, what with this being Merika, but you’re right that we need to make these cases more about the evidence. Are you willing to pony up for the testing? Because I suspect the largest barrier is cost (Why else would anyone agree to go on Maury Povich?), and again, this is America; we have a 250 year history of not being willing to pay for shit we want. You want this, and I agree it should happen; Are you actually willing to pay for what you want?
Curse words are remarkably versatile in Meriken, at least. Probably “stuff”.
“Curse words are remarkably versatile in Meriken”
You mean Amreekan?
Yeah, let’s assume all women are lying cheaters until proven otherwise!