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Alcuin in Wonderland

The Intellectual Renaissance of Western Patriarchy: One big sandwich joke.

At first glance, Alcuin’s blog would seem to be some sort of parody. The blog’s slogan – “Promoting the Intellectual Renaissance of Western Patriarchy” – seems so over-the-top pretentious that even the smuggest of would-be intellectuals wouldn’t be able to post it with a straight face.

But if Alcuin is a troll, he’s a dedicated one, and one (at least based on my less-than-exhaustive survey of his blog) who never seems to break character.  So I’m assuming he’s real. Which makes him a pompous ass with a lot of irritating ideas he’s somehow convinced himself are new and interesting. Take (please!) his recent post “Back Where They Belong.” And yes, “they” mean who you think, and “where they belong” means where you think.

Men should run the government, business, education, and religion. Women should stay at home. Young unmarried women can briefly work as kindergarten and elementary teachers, but there are no reasons why men can’t usually do this as well.

I’m not sure if Alcuin understands that women actually hold most of the jobs that currently exist, and that removing virtually all of them from the workplace would cause the economy to implode like, well, Alcuin, if you suddenly removed all of his idiocy. Also, how many kindergarten teachers do we really need?

As long as women run things, men will continue to be sidelined and slandered because feminism is a zero-sum movement.

Women … run things?

There can be no peace between the sexes until women are back where they belong. The sexes are meant to complement each other rather than compete and put one another down.

Yes, and the best way to show how the sexes “are meant to complement each other rather than … put one another down” is for one of the sexes to, er, put the other down by sending them back into the home.

Women have no business being lawyers, judges, educators, doctors, bureaucrats, writers, or religious leaders. Their attempted leadership in these areas, an illegitimate coup d’etat, is destroying our society.

I agree. Lady Pope is doing a terrible job of dealing with all those abuse cases!

Sadly, they prefer to enjoy their present situation, and let society rot, than go back where they belong and participate in building things again. Much like enjoying the concert on the sinking Titanic – though in this case, don’t expect chivalrous men to jump into the cold water so the ladies can have space on the lifeboats.

A little Titanic humor always enlivens a dull rant, eh?

Knock knock!

Who’s there!

An iceberg!

Damn, I guess we shouldn’t have kept going in zero visibility in a part of the ocean where icebergs had been recently sighted, in our ship that doesn’t have enough lifeboats for everyone!

I crack myself up sometimes. Back to Alcuin:

Feminism is a hate movement that brings out the worst in women.

Unlike the Men’s Rights movement, a hate movement that brings out the best in men!

It hates women because it hates femininity and motherhood, the chief characteristics of what it means to be a genuine woman. It brings out the worst in women by turning them into men, or trying to masculate them.

Damn you, feminism! Don’t go masculating those ladies! First they want to wear pants, and the next thing you know they’re growing ironic mustaches and using Axe Detailers instead of loofahs and subscribing to Bass Fishing Monthly.

It hates men because it blames everything on men, and regards masculinity in men to be evil. It emasculates men at the same time. Gays and, much more secondarily, manginas, are somewhat acceptable to the gynocracy, especially when the furniture needs moving or some bitch can’t pay her own bills.

Because when you need furniture moved, or some money, you call … the gays? Is this some new gay stereotype I’m not aware of? I mean, manginas, sure, manginas are furniture-movers and money-to-bitches conduits extraordinaire. That’s how they get access to pussy, after all.

But what’s the incentive for the gays?  They don’t need pussy; they’d, presumably, prefer to spend their money on tiny dogs and gym memberships than on some bitch’s bills; and while gays may have strong opinions about where the furniture should go, are they really interested in carrying it there themselves?

Women generally use men, and feminism continues this grand tradition. A man’s value is defined according to his use to women. Deeper than that, feminism regards men in the same way that the Nazis regarded Jews – men are Untermensch and cannot be granted the same rights and privileges that women are.

And … now we’ve got Nazis.

Feminism aims to bring men down, as it is a zero-sum movement. It doesn’t simply aim to improve the lot of women through, for instance, education, but seeks to exclude men from education.

It does? Last I heard, colleges were actually lowering their standards in order to enroll more guys.

Thus the current propaganda about campus rape, and the attempt to make it easier to accuse a university male of rape in the USA. Thanks, government. You are, once again, the handmaiden of misandry.

And handmaidens are bad. Not like Shieldmaidens.

Feminist hate will never be satisfied, so men can’t keep avoiding the issue. We must avoid feminism as much as we can, and educate each other about it and about alternatives.

Generally it is advisable to actually know something about something before trying to “educating” other people about it.

This intellectual Renaissance of Western Patriarchy business is a lot trickier than you might think.

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Sharculese
10 years ago

Almost every post seen here is one of a truly poisonous woman spewing bile at someone (usually a man) who simply disagrees with her in her opinion (delusion) that men and women are the same, and that he delights in a world where there are profound, ineradicable, fundamental, and universal differences–Praise the Lord!!–in other words, INEQUALITY between the sexes, and that far from being “oppression” or “bias” recognition of these differences form the basis of why men and women can enjoy one another! On a different level, they also explain reproduction and the emergence of the family, but one thing at a time!

dkm have you noticed how you sort of sputter out some variation this idea that men and women are inherently unequal about every five minutes, but you never do anything to substantiate it, you just insist that it has to be so and then just continue on with your obtuse livejournal-esqe screeds, based on nothing but your hope and wish that what you said has to be true, and if you just scream scream scream it loud enough the world will see that youre right?

there are two reasons for this- the first is that most high school students have better communication skills than you. the second is that it is something you made up, and saying it louder wont make it any less absurd.

Bee
Bee
10 years ago

Certainly, after reading posts from Nobinayamu, Bee, amandajane5, KathleenB, hellkell, etc. hatred of these she-demons is the only rational, if not possible response for a man!

Oh, but David K. Meller, I don’t hate men. I just hate you.

And, for what it’s worth, I don’t mind if you hate me in return. I just don’t see how it’s cause for general, widespread misogynistic writings on the internet.

Also: What, don’t I rate “she-weasel” status anymore? (No offense to weasels!)

Ami Angelwings
10 years ago

I’ll repost since this was scrolled off xD

Are you CERTAIN that your website manboobz.com is really dedicated to mocking misogyny?

After looking at these posts, and dozens, if not hundreds more like them, hatred of women starts to look more and more reasonable to an impartial observer. In fact, you may soon have to change the title of manboobz.com to something like womenbeinghateful.com! Certainly, after reading posts from Nobinayamu, Bee, amandajane5, KathleenB, hellkell, etc. hatred of these she-demons is the only rational, if not possible response for a man!

You–and manboobz.com–can’t really mock misogyny if the women posters here are all so hateful that misogyny is no longer ridiculous, but an entirely natural respose to the venom of these truly hateful harpies!

Since you opened the door, DKM,

How about this? 😀

David (Futrelle) posts something from his archives of what a misogynist has said (i.e. the kinds of stuff he posts about)…

and you show us an equivalent Manboobz comment from one of the ppl you mentioned :3

Okay? 😀

(DF, you up for it? :3 )

Pecunium
10 years ago

Lets put Meller into context:

Almost every post of David K. Meller’s is one of a truly poisonous man spewing bile at someone who simply disagrees with him in his opinion (delusion) that men and women are profoundly different.

(Hey Deke, I fixed that for ya…. Don’t thank me, I know how hard these things can be to see for oneself).

VoiP: He has no love for me either. He doesn’t seem to know quite what to make of me. He seems to think I believe women are the only good soldiers or something.

Which is so far from true as to be laughable. Good soldiers can put difference aside and mission first. Meller can’t even keep his own mission first (he’s embarrassed to be reminded of how happy he is to see women suffering, and how much he wants to see them wiped out, and enslaved; these he says are because he loves them).

Anyone who can’t manage that certainly can’t keep track of how to do a 9-line medevac, or keep track of the eight signs of nerve agent poisoning (or remember what to do if he encounters someone who is suffering from nerve agent poisoning), or write a T; and/or M, on a helmet when someone needs tell the medics what was going on.

And that’s just the simple stuff. That’s not loading a cryto-fill, so the GPS isn’t scrambled and the unit gets lost, or pulling the needed PMCS on the Humvee, so nothing blows when you’re five miles outside the wire in hostile terrain.

Having to wonder if he’s planning to abandon the women in the unit is the cake those are icing.

So yeah, even at the things “men” are supposed to be best at, he fails.

David K. Meller
David K. Meller
10 years ago

Sherculese–September 5, 2011@ 11:32 pm

“Substantiate WHAT”? That men and women are fundamentally different, and unequal in essential respects? That is utterly self-evident, and is common to the experience of everyone alive!

Tell you what. I’ll substantiate female differences, biological, mental and emotional when you write your first book :”substantiating” that 2+2=4, that water is wet at room temperature at sea level, and that apples, spinach, and beefsteak are all “equal” as food, they are still essentially different substances!

Such a book may even make the best-seller lists, and make you one of America’s renowned authors! And if it doesn’t, you will, long before completing it, understand exactly how foolish your demand to “substantiate” the obvious and inevitable really is.

Have fun!

PEACE AND FREEDOM!!
David K. Meller

Rutee Katreya
10 years ago

“Substantiate WHAT”? That men and women are fundamentally different, and unequal in essential respects? That is utterly self-evident, and is common to the experience of everyone alive!

Then it should be easy to provide serious evidence for.

And no, it isn’t common to everyone’s experience either, like mine.

Holly Pervocracy
10 years ago

It’s mathematically provable and can be demonstrated in practice that 2+2=4. It’s not something you “just know.” In fact, almost nothing but “x=x” comes down to “just know.”

The fact that you find the idea of getting knowledge from any source other than your ass doesn’t mean that all of science and society is built on the foundation of ass-pulling.

Holly Pervocracy
10 years ago

Er… “that you can’t conceive of getting knowledge from any source other than your ass.”

I meant for that to make sense.

…But since it didn’t, I’m admitting and correcting my mistake. :p

Rutee Katreya
10 years ago

Incidental note:

http://www.dartmouth.edu/~etrnsfer/water.htm
http://www.nyu.edu/pages/mathmol/textbook/slg.html

Not scholarly research on the matter, but evidence is trivial to produce.

Unlike water’s states of matter, gender dimorphism is the subject of a lot of ongoing research. It’s not kind to your thesis.

Bagelsan
Bagelsan
10 years ago

And if it doesn’t, you will, long before completing it, understand exactly how foolish your demand to “substantiate” the obvious and inevitable really is.

He’s like an anti-Zen master: he gives you actually meaningless tasks that make you less enlightened upon completion. :p

KathleenB
KathleenB
10 years ago

Holy crap, DKM just keeps piling on the stupid, doesn’t he?

Dracula
Dracula
10 years ago

This is kind if like when you ask a smart-ass little kid a question they can’t answer, and they respond with “Well if you don’t know I’m not gonna tell you!”, or “You’re only asking me because you don’t know the answer!” and so forth.

They think they’ve skillfully covered up their ignorance, when really they’ve just made themselves look willfully stupid.

Hershele Ostropoler
10 years ago

Holly:

It’s mathematically provable and can be demonstrated in practice that 2+2=4.

And Russell and Whitehead got quite a ways into Principia Mathematica before demonstrating that 1+1=2. If you want to talk about substantiating the obvious.

ozymandias42
10 years ago

It used to be considered obvious and common-sense that the sun went around the earth.

It used to be considered obvious and common-sense that the earth is flat (although admittedly that was even before Aristotle).

It used to be considered obvious and common-sense that women couldn’t have orgasms and that the treatment for hysteria is stimulating the pelvic area until she has a hysterical paroxysm.

Obvious, common sense shit has a terrible track record.

Pecunium
10 years ago

that water is wet at room temperature at sea level

Which is why Antarctic beaches are so popular, and the preferred route from London to Vladivostok has always be to transit the North Pole.

apples, spinach, and beefsteak are all “equal” as food,

Which is why Popeye is so strong and people who live on nothing but apples are as healthy as people with a varied diet.

Societal Contract
Societal Contract
10 years ago

DKM, “Of course, none of the above appllies to the hordes of modern women who in their frantic quest to foolishly imitate men, end up treating their children more like potted plants being given “qualtiy time” while ‘supermom’ is balancing being a fortune 500 CEO”

Yes because we all know that HORDES of women are fortune 500 CEOs.

Since we are on the topic here of housework, child-raising and stay-at-home parents, a common theme in the Manosphere is that women nag, nag, nag over inconsequential shit like a random sock laying about the house or a dish in the sink.

Simultaneously these very same men complain that women are no longer satisfied in their role as Domesticated Goddess.

Well, pick your goddamned poison. The only woman who is going to worry and nage over a sock is the woman who’s domain is the house which she works hard to make look good, such as my Grandma. My Grandma is a nag because she’s invested in how her house looks, thats her life and she doesn’t have too much interest outside of that.

My mom and myself on the otherhand don’t give a damn about a sock laying about. We will not nag you about it nor will we pick it up. We know that when you need it, you will pick it up and wash it. Its of no concern to us. Neither is the dish or pot your left dirty in the sink. whne you need a dish or pot, you will wash it and use it.

You will get neither nagging nor maid service from us.

Adults know how to pick up and wash their own damn socks and don’t need to be told or have it done for them like 3 year olds.

Moreover in today’s world when a man or woman comes home from work he or she takes a shower, grabs a sandwich and gets online to blog.

Anyone who is nagging about socks either doesn’t have a computer or they are over the age of 80 or both. Blogging takes precendence over housework for the rest of us.

WHAT WORLD ARE THESE DUDES LIVING IN WHERE THEY THINK ANY WOMAN UNDER THE AGE OF 80 TODAY HAS THE TIME OR INTEREST IN NAGGING THEM?

David K. Meller
David K. Meller
10 years ago

No, comrade, the sisterhood from hell once youall got out of the home, just NAGS everyone about the so-called “glass ceiling”, so-called “hostile workplace”, nonsense about “sexual harassment”–as if any man, even if completely drunk, would have the slightest sexual interest in the likes of them–so-called “discrimination”, phony rape charges, and so on ad nausem…

This feminist nagging takes up valuable court time, distracts law enforcement, and wastes immense amounts of money both in legal fees and threatened lawsuits!

Women are NAGS–Period! It is just as nervewracking to us whether you nag men in the bedroom or the boardroom; the sum total of human unhappiness increases all the same!

Nagging is just what (most) women do, it has nothing to do with whether they have domestic chores to perform or not!

PEACE AND FREEDOM!!
David K. Meller

Pecunium
10 years ago

Meller: What about the water at sea level and the equal nature of beef and apples?

Societal Contract
Societal Contract
10 years ago

DKM, that’s all changed since the advent of blogs. We want to get in and get out of work asap with no hassles or distractions so that we can get home and blog.

We just don’t have the interest in nagging that we used to.

Internet is more fun.

Bagelsan
Bagelsan
10 years ago

No, comrade, the sisterhood from hell once youall got out of the home, just NAGS everyone about the so-called “glass ceiling”, so-called “hostile workplace”, nonsense about “sexual harassment”–as if any man, even if completely drunk, would have the slightest sexual interest in the likes of them–so-called “discrimination”, phony rape charges, and so on ad nausem…

Woman: “Omg, stop raping me already! How may times do I have to tell you? It’s like every freaking time I walk down this street you have to stick your dick in me without asking! Could you please try getting consent first, just once?”

Man: “Dammit woman, every time I rape you it’s ‘nag nag nag’! Can’t a violent sex offender get any peace and quiet in this alleyway?”

…Is that kind of what you have in mind, DKM? :p

Societal Contract
Societal Contract
10 years ago

DKM, men ARE getting raped in epidemic proportions, and guess what? Its NOT women who are the perpetrators.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2011/jul/17/the-rape-of-men

ozymandias42
10 years ago

And sometimes it is women who are the perpetrators! I don’t think the solution here is to have EVERYONE shut up about their rapes, but instead to encourage a culture in which everyone can be confident that they’ll be supported after they’re raped.

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
10 years ago

Women are NAGS–Period!

Even the sweet old-fashioned women?

David K. Meller
David K. Meller
10 years ago

No, not the sweet, old fashioned women! There are some who are still worth keeping, although, one must search for them! Diamonds are rarer, and harder to find, then smelly old lumps of coal.

PEACE AND FREEDOM!!
David K. Meller

Societal Contract
Societal Contract
10 years ago

Sweet old fashioned women are the only nags! My Grandma is an example. She’s an old fashioned sweetheart who bakes homemade pies, quilts, the whole nine yards. And because her the domestic is her only domain, she is really picky about stains on the carpet, socks laying about, etc.

Me? I don’t even notice socks and stains. I’m on the internet.

Today’s woman has not only no time to nag, she has no interest. We would rather be blogging.

Captain Bathrobe
10 years ago

It is just as nervewracking to us whether you nag men in the bedroom or the boardroom; the sum total of human unhappiness increases all the same!

Dear DKM,

Please speak for yourself, because you certainly don’t speak for all men. I’ve worked with, and for, many fine and competent women. I’d much, much rather work with them than with the likes of you.

This man thinks you’re an asshole.

Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
10 years ago

Curiouser and curiouser:

Women are NAGS–Period! It is just as nervewracking to us whether you nag men in the bedroom or the boardroom; the sum total of human unhappiness increases all the same!

…And mere minutes later:

No, not the sweet, old fashioned women!

Your webbed feet are scrambling for purchase, Meller.

PosterformerlyknownasElizabeth

then smelly old lumps of coal.

Coal does not really have much of a scent. Perhaps musty at worst. It also is a very useful thing to have for several reasons as it can light a home, heat it, be used to draw with, and many other things.

Diamonds, on the hand, while equally scentless, do have industrial use but are not as easy to use as a lump of coal.

Pecunium
10 years ago

Beth: They burn really brightly. If you’ve never seen the blue-white flame of diamonds, you really ought to.

David K. Meller
David K. Meller
10 years ago

C’mon, posterformerlyknownasElizabeth,

We KNOW why you LOVE diamonds, and the reason has nothing to do with “industrial uses” still less with “burning with a bright blue flame”.

‘A kiss on the hand may be so continental, but diamonds are a girls best friend…” Greed, thy name is woman!

Marilyn Monroe still speaks to the modern woman today, doesn’t she?

PEACE AND FREEDOM!!
David K. Meller

Magpie
Magpie
10 years ago

Men nag too (esp DKM), they just don’t call it nagging. 😉

amandajane5
10 years ago

Marilyn Monroe still speaks to the modern woman today, doesn’t she?

Well no, given that she’s long-dead, didn’t write that song, and was being paid to perform it as part of her job. But hey, keep throwing straw-women at us, they burn the most easily.

And stop with the freedom bullshit because you’re clearly advocating for women to be uneducated slaves.

Societal Contract
Societal Contract
10 years ago

“Marilyn Monroe still speaks to the modern woman today, doesn’t she?”

Yes! In fact just last night I summoned her on my ouija board.

Pecunium
10 years ago

Meller: PosterformerlyknownasElizabeth was saying she likes coal better than diamonds.

Someone was overpaid for what literacy you obtained.

PosterformerllyknownasElizabeth
PosterformerllyknownasElizabeth
10 years ago

I do think that coal is more useful then diamonds even if diamonds make a pretty light. For the main reason of easier to find and use for the average person.

And if I was to purchase jewelry, I would get emeralds on silver, not diamonds. Diamonds lack…zest for me.

ozymandias42
10 years ago

I would dump anyone who bought me a diamond. Blood diamonds are evil, and anyone who is unaware of my views on the matter and yet claims to know me well enough to buy me jewelry deserves to be dumped.

Pecunium
10 years ago

Diamonds (the bog-standard white ones) are boring, and hideously overpriced.

The one’s I like (such as the Pumpkin Diamond at the Smithsonian) are all too expensive too, but that’s because they are rare.

But diamonds, as usually meant are a bigger racket than gold/silver/platinum as investments.

VoiP
VoiP
10 years ago

I would dump anyone who bought me a diamond. Blood diamonds are evil…

This. Although DKM uses conflict in Africa as an example for why black people are inferior, so he almost certainly doesn’t care.

Bagelsan
Bagelsan
10 years ago

The best kind of diamonds are the kind made out of dead pets. Duh.

BlackBloc
BlackBloc
10 years ago

>>I would dump anyone who bought me a diamond.

I would check if they’re synthetic first but otherwise agreed. Though technically I think *I’M* supposed to be giving diamonds, since, you know, penis and all. Everyone knows about how our neolithic ancestors hunted the mammoth then went over and got a ring at DeBeers for their woman.

Societal Contract
Societal Contract
10 years ago

” Everyone knows about how our neolithic ancestors hunted the mammoth then went over and got a ring at DeBeers for their woman.”

LOL!

“I would dump anyone who bought me a diamond. Blood diamonds are evil…”

What about pearls, are they ethical? I like my pearls like I like my men – BLACK!

Bee
Bee
10 years ago

I would dump anyone who bought me a diamond.

Fourthed. Although I think we’re getting away from the real point, which is that feminists are dark, dull, numerous, and utilitarian, and diamonds are women who hate themselves, to the point where they would willingly be in David K. Meller’s company. And be tranquil and soft and not vomiting in their mouth all the time.

Magpie
Magpie
10 years ago

Was going to say, what about pink Argyle diamonds. Then I remembered: Rio Tinto. Promise I’ll never buy diamonds (says the pensioner, lol).

Holly Pervocracy
10 years ago

I would be less than enthralled by diamonds, partly because of blood diamonds, but mostly because even the “honest” ones are massively overvalued. There are so many fascinating and underexploited colored stones out there.

I would be so much more impressed with a really beautiful corundum, beryl, or spinel.

I’m curious how this is about women’s “greed,” though, considering that it’s generally considered gauche to sell your engagement ring and still go through with the marriage. Do you think someone would get married just to get divorced and then sell the ring? That seems… convoluted, to say the least.

ozymandias42
10 years ago

Holly, our greed is for shinies. We want shiny expensive prezzies because we are silly girls and only care about things that glitter, possibly because we have the intelligence level of a magpie.

Magpie
Magpie
10 years ago

Hey! I resemble that remark!

Pam
Pam
10 years ago

Well no, given that she’s long-dead, didn’t write that song, and was being paid to perform it as part of her job

You’re POLLUTING the issue with FACTS!!

Amnesia
Amnesia
10 years ago

My distaste for rings in general is more practical than ethical. As someone that has enough trouble keeping track of a cell phone or keys on a day to day basis, such a tiny thing as an engagement ring could easily be lost any time I took it off. To negate the chance of losing it, I’d have to keep it in a jewelery box and never wear it, making it little more than useless clutter in my room.
Useless clutter in a room, costs way more than it’s worth, sounds like DKM, doesn’t it?

Ami Angelwings
10 years ago

We KNOW why you LOVE diamonds, and the reason has nothing to do with “industrial uses” still less with “burning with a bright blue flame”.

You never elaborated DKM xD What IS the reason? 😀

amandajane5
10 years ago

I do love my diamond ring, but mostly because of it’s history and legacy. My maternal great-grandmother went to college on scholarship in the ’20s and all of the other girls were getting diamonds and furs as gifts and she wasn’t, so when my mom went to college in the ’60s, she started sending her diamonds and furs. Mom was running on the way to a basketball game (she was playing, but women only played at half-time back then) and tripped over a speed bump and crushed the ring that TuMama had sent her. When she got married, she used the big diamond to make her engagement ring. My paternal grandmother donated four trapezoid diamonds from something she’d inherited, and went up and had it made at Tiffany’s in in New York. When we got engaged all my husband had to do was have it re-sized.

I love my diamonds because of the story behind them. I refused to let my husband buy me anything.

And I’m noticing that my ring really needs to be cleaned – it’s much prettier then! Kaleidoscope-like! I disapprove of blood diamonds also, and don’t know if mine are, but like my furs (yes, inherited them also) people are already dead, should I just throw them out?

I find it a difficult question.