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Batmen’s Rights

I didn't know they carried books like that in the library.

There are many things that are annoying, obviously, about Reddit’s Men’s Rights subreddit. One thing that isn’t: a relatively new commenter there by the name of BatmensBegins, a fellow who knows how to get right to the heart of any argument. Provided that heart is him, Batman.

A few of his recent comments will give you an idea of his perspicacity.

In a discussion of a New Zealand business lobbyist sacked for saying that women get paid less because they menstruate:

This is why the best form of labor is me, Batman. Batman don’t menstruate. Batman is driven by a psychopathic desire for vengeance and unresolved Oedipal feelings. Batman’s the perfect man. Batman men-struates.

Batman.

In a discussion of an article about prominent men recently accused of rape:

[T]here’s one blind spot in the article: what of the billionaire playboys who have lost their fathers and now fight crime dressed as a bat? Not that I’m one myself, mind you. But if you think about it, they’re the real victims here.

In a discussion of women being, you know, evil goldigging whores:

As Batman, I have many hysterical biddies seeking to con me out of my hard-earned money. Women such as Grass Girl, Girl Joker and Latex Ass. Thankfully, I’ve built up a resistance to their feminine wiles and devious behavior. I can’t even get an erection anymore.

I would just like to salute BatmensBegins for his single-minded devotion to bringing up the important topic of Batman whenever and wherever he posts.

Also, if you’re a Redditor, I highly recommend that you check out a fledgling subreddit called r/againstmensrights. It’s not actually against men’s rights, per se, just the army of douchebags who make up the Men’s Rights Movement as we know it today. It hasn’t quite hit critical mass yet in terms of comments or subscribers, but it’s a handy place to find out about the latest bits of egregious misogyny being upvoted elsewhere on Reddit.

 

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Johnny Pez
13 years ago

That’s the Goddamn Batman to you!

ozymandias42
13 years ago

Morrissey is… Morrissey. He’s special, but we forgive him on account of There Is A Light Which Never Goes Out is the greatest love song ever.

Spearhafoc
13 years ago

Is that the inspiration for Batman: The Brave and the Bold?

Both take a lot of inspiration from the Silver Age.

Grant Morrison’s take on Batman is that everything, everything, written about him actually happened to him. All the crazy Silver Age happenings are real things he’s experienced, more or less.

For example, a Silver Age story involving Batman meeting the Batman of another world (Zur-En-Arrh) was retconned as an hallucination Batman put in his own memory to create a backup Batman personality in case he ever got brainwashed. That’s just how Batman rolls.

zhinxy
13 years ago

Spearhafoc – Well, as somebody who has spent quite a lot of time in Batfandom, I’m fairly sure that they aren’t “made-up-ones” so much as… Grass Girl = Poison Ivy, Joker Girl = Harley Quinn, and Latex Butt = Selina XD

Sort of a “names have been changed to protect the guilty” bit on the part of our brave troll for justice?

Holly Pervocracy
13 years ago

Yeah, I think P:A-N(c) needs to establish himself as a singer-songwriter and 1980s sex symbol before we can judge this fairly.

I’m not saying being a singer-songwriter and 1980s sex symbol makes such sentiments okay, I’m just saying that Morrissey has given something to society. P:A-N(c) hasn’t provided us with so much as a karaoke tape.

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

It’s more like how Morrison rolls xD

Also Zhinxy’s icon is pretty :3 (and I think she’s right about who the chars are supposed to be :3 )

Sharculese
Sharculese
13 years ago

spearhafoc left out the part where grant morrisson’s take on everything is colored by the fact that he is totally fucking insane. brilliant writer, but absolutely nuts.

It’s more like how Morrison rolls xD

sounds about right

Sharculese
Sharculese
13 years ago

Morrissey is… Morrissey. He’s special, but we forgive him on account of There Is A Light Which Never Goes Out is the greatest love song ever.

this is the correct answer.

also we forgive him on account of paint a vulgar picture, bigmouth strikes again, half a person, etc., etc.,

Spearhafoc
13 years ago

Yes, I know that Morrison needs serious help, but I don’t want him to get it. Having him believe that he’s been visited by extra-dimensional beings is a small price to pay for All-Star Superman.

Sharculese
Sharculese
13 years ago

totally agree

Captain Bathrobe
Captain Bathrobe
13 years ago

This is the one of the most boring blog entries here… so, there’s a very mediocre troll on reddit.com/r/MensRights/ … and that’s all? He even posted that frequent…

Can’t we please talk about something more interesting…?

You know what’s the most awesome thing about the internet? If you don’t like what’s on one website, you can always go to another.

Spearhafoc
13 years ago

Plus, we’re talking about Batman here. Batman! How could Batman ever be boring?

Sure, there are bad Batman-related things out there (Batman and Robin, I’m looking at you), but not a lot of boring ones.

ozymandias42
13 years ago

And Morrissey! Forget country, the Smiths are the true music of pain.

vacuumslayer
13 years ago

Question: who is worse: Peter Nolan or Morrissey?

Oh, this an easy one. Peter Nolan.

Arielle Shander
13 years ago

An anti-MRA subreddit?

…YESYESYESYESYES! Finally, a sign of SANITY! Cheers to the person/people who formed the subreddit Expose the MRAs for who they really are!

kristinmh
kristinmh
13 years ago

Film Noir Detective Batman

Ha! I actually want to read that now.

No, scratch that, I want to see that made into a film by Tim Burton, starring…hmm…Nicholas Cage.

marc2020
marc2020
13 years ago

As I’ve often said the mantra of Morrissey’ fans everywhere should be “Oh god what has he said now!?”

caseymordred
caseymordred
13 years ago

What else has Morrissey said? I love stupid controversies like this.

Shora
13 years ago

This guy is officially the best troll ever. He deserves a medal.

HINDU
HINDU
13 years ago

I’m 100% against MRA. What’s this mens rights silliness? Men have and have always had all the rights! India even has a huge MRA following. Imagine that? A country that burns women (accidental kitchen death, google it) if they don’t come with a big enough dowry, and they’ve got MRAs!?!?

STOP. Just stop.

Nedra
Nedra
13 years ago

It seems like the anti-men’s rights subreddit might face some avoidable criticism because of it’s name.

shaenon
13 years ago

Batman has always been surrounded by a ton of awesome female characters. If I were writing the Batman comic, I’d make him like Dolemite, hardly ever fighting with his own fists because he’s so badass that his women can kick the crap out of bad guys for him. Batman would just sit on a roof brooding.

Actually, Birds of Prey was kind of like that. But in the Dolemite version, Batman would also rap.

Snowy
Snowy
13 years ago

I want to live in your batman world.

Trollin'MRAs
Trollin'MRAs
13 years ago

I LOL’D! BatmensBegins is the proud owner of ONE FREE INTERNET, from me.

The subreddit’s great, but it would be even better if it was “againstmra.”

MRA don’t deserve to be called men. They’re little boys who can’t understand with the fact that ladies are a different gender, not a different species.