It would be nice to be able to respond to this steaming pile of bullshit on Reddit’s Men’s Rights Subreddit, but I have been banned there for the crime of including the subreddit in my “boob roll.” (I’m not going to set up a sockpuppet account to comment.)
MR redditors are of course allowed to comment here, as are the moderators of that subreddit. Even though they are boobz.
Here’s the thread in the Man Boobz Forum in which Holly posted the Man Boobz challenge.
Hating hate is not hate.
I mean, semantically it can be, but emotionally and morally? Nope.
Anyway, it’s not like the MRAs were civil with feminists, and women in general, before we started pushing back. It’s just that they didn’t have such specific targets.
Holly, I guess we’re all haters for hating haters. But are they haters for hating hater-haters? And would we be haters for hating hater-hater-haters?
Really, Holly, maybe if you were more of a lay-dee, and you sweetened your tone, and were just *nice* to these boys, you wouldn’t have these problems. You can’t expect them to initiate civility. They’re just guys, after all.
That would be me.
Right on, filetofswedishfish. Chivalry is dead, and the ensuing horde of anti-chivalry zombies is all Feminism’s fault.
Seriously! How can we expect chivalry/civility from men, when they’re programmed to only do that for True Laydeez, when we Feminists have made it unfashionable to be Twoo Laydeez?
Uck. I don’t know how Ami does this. I can only keep it up for about two seconds before I have to stop to lol my ass off.
Just a friendly reminder! The Bad Boy Cock Carousel is also on a t-shirt!
http://manboobz.com/t-shirts-etc/
I mean, semantically it can be, but emotionally and morally? Nope.(Holly)
Yep, you are right. But being right doesnt seem to stop the hate. If anything, mocking and teasing just seems to increase it.
I can’t speak for others, but I am comfortable with that. It’s not my job to “decrease” the hate.
It’s not my job to “decrease” the hate.(Vacuumslayer)
But what if your actions help increase it?
I asked–in a roundabout way…in a comment that is still awaiting moderation– for people to imagine asking people to take a similar tack with virulently racist activists/bloggers. Would patience/tact be asked of them? Or is this asked of us because, after all, we are only women/feminists?
Other than becoming male, I don’t know how to remedy that.
Or something that makes more grammatical sense.
Vacuumslayer- Even if you were a man, the hate wouldn’t decrease. Because then you’d be a mangina.
Also, seriously, is this a *tone argument*? We’re supposed to be polite to the group that was calling all women bitches, Seawards, and any number of other really nasty gender-specific slurs as a matter of course, and generic reference well before Manboobz existed? Not my job. If I’m supposed to be ok with them saying I’m privileged when I’m not, responsible for rape/abuse/assault/harassment when I’m not, and any number of other nasty things? They can put up with me mocking their hateful position. Because being nice sure as hell isn’t going to change their minds.
Are all MRA’s 13? Because…”mangina?” Srsly?
Do you know what else would decrease the hate? If people were to stop hating women. I have no control over people who hate women, and no magical sparkley ability to make people who hate women suddenly stop hating women. I can take some small amusement at the expense of people who would as soon as not see me raped, beaten, controlled, and/or abused.
Also, long before Manboobz was even a pair of tender boyish breast buds (thanks for the turn of phrase Holly) the MRA movement had a well deserved rep as the Abusers Lobby. These men make Stormfront look nice and reasonable!
“But being right doesnt seem to stop the hate. If anything, mocking and teasing just seems to increase it.”
http://www.neatorama.com/2007/09/03/clowns-kicked-kkk-asses/
I’d say that laughing at bigots works just fine.
It might be asked. 😀 But I’ve noticed that anti-racist people tend toward the direct and aggressive… because they’ve learned that being nice and polite just doesn’t get through. And the Civil Rights movement achieved most of its successes by being disruptive and confrontational. You go with what works. Such tactics may increase resentment in the short run, but they also have the effect of making “invisible” people visible, and in the long run they tend to have positive results.
Vacuumslayer- It’s their phrase. And I think yes, they are.
Ha!
That was a good demonstration of how no feminist site can pass the manboobz test either, even Manboobz. They all fail on misandry and abuse denial, at least.
Holly: But to answer the implication: Hating women, and
hatingmocking people who hate women? Still not morally equivalent.is the way I see it. I don’t hate them. Loathe, perhaps, but not hate. I have people I hate. MRAs ain’t them.
titfortat: The alternative to mocking MRAs is what? To take them seriously? Not Gonna Happen. To ignore them? And give them the assent of silence? Not Gonna Happen. If/when they drop the misogyny, and actually look at the problems men are facing, that would be different. But when what they do is say scaring old people is good thing, and that rape vicitms had it coming, or that all women are just self-centered gold-diggers, or “sperm thieves”.
They have it coming.
They forth at the mouth. They make violent (even murderous) suggestions, and you want what…”Oh, we’re sorry, we didn’t know you were upset? What can we do to make it better.”
Fuck that noise. Being “polite” isn’t going to change their minds. It seems to encourage them; shows that women (or other men) agree with them. I don’t. And I won’t be silent about it, any more than I am silent about racism, or torture or any other sort of injustice that pisses me off.
They are entitled to vent. I’m not trying to prevent them from being prick and assholes.
I’m trying to stop them. There’s a difference. I know that’s going to piss them off.
I don’t care; because they are wrong. Even in the places where they have legitimate complaints, the ways they pursue in trying to rectify them are reprehensible. So I will continue to say those things need to be fixed, and mock the MRAs. Just because we are in agreement doesn’t make what they do acceptable. The enemy of my enemy is not my friend just for that.
@Pecunium
Manboobz fails on misandry and abuse denial, also on holding misogyny to one standard and misandry to another (bigotry)
I bet David won’t allow me post about this!
Hi David are you afraid to let me post?
Pecunium
Here’s an irony. I didnt even know what MRA’s were until I stumbled on to Manboobz.
I sure knew what misogyny was before I stumbled on to Manboobz.
tifortat: And…. That you didn’t know about them didn’t mean the didn’t exist. It’s not the well known, it’s the existing.
If no one challenges them, they will grow. They will have the silence of assent, and think they are in the right, or possessed of a silent majority. I’ve seen what tolerance of intolerance lets happen.
I don’t want to make it any easier for this group to pull that.
Also, seriously, is this a *tone argument*? We’re supposed to be polite to the group that was calling all women bitches, Seawards, and any number of other really nasty gender-specific slurs as a matter of course, and generic reference well before Manboobz existed?
A common thread I’ve noticed with the MRA trolls here, and most of the posters back on the MRA websites, is that they will spew the nastiest insults they can think of, be deliberately obnoxious in every conceivable way, and then be shocked, SHOCKED, grabbing for the fainting salts, when women respond with anything harsher than, “Oh, poor baby, you’re sad! Let me make it all better!” Because that’s what women are supposed to do, dammit! Haven’t you seen any movies?
(I just had the revelation that one of the reasons I love “The Shining” is that it punctures Jack Nicholson’s film persona as the Swaggering Asshole Who Needs a Woman to Put Up With His Abuse and Heal His Special Pain. In “The Shining,” being meek and understanding and patient is exactly the wrong way to deal with a guy who acts like Jack Nicholson, because eventually he’ll come at you with a hatchet. Also, what’s with that guy in the bear suit giving the dude a blowjob?)
I think they love Manboobz, though. They love being talked about. As Amanda Marcotte has pointed out, any mention of MRA antics anywhere on the Internet will result in a flood of excited trolls from MRA sites, eager to share their bigoted opinions with anyone other than the twelve guys in the Spearhead comments.
I love The Shining because those two little girls are still the scariest damn thing I’ve ever seen.
Oh, and the guy in the dog/bear costume: What makes that scene so horrifying is not the fact that they’re ghosts, it’s that YOU DIDN’T NEED TO SEE THAT.
A common thread I’ve noticed with the MRA trolls here, and most of the posters back on the MRA websites, is that they will spew the nastiest insults they can think of, be deliberately obnoxious in every conceivable way, and then be shocked, SHOCKED, grabbing for the fainting salts, when women respond with anything harsher than, “Oh, poor baby, you’re sad! Let me make it all better!”
This, yes, exactly. It’s amazing how people will tell me that I’m the worst abusive cunt who ever didn’t know their place, and then turn around and act like I’m the asshole because I respond with even mild snark. Sometimes I’m the asshole just for quoting them! (David certainly is.)
I’ve experienced this in real life, though. I had a roommate once who was giving me a loooong spiel about how everyone but Real True Christians is going to burn in the flames forever. And then she said my relatives who’d died in the Holocaust were in Hell.
I said “fuck you.”
She literally held her hand to her mouth and started quaking at this unbelievable, unwarranted insult that came out of nowhere and hurt her so deeply.
oops, I forgot I used a filtered word, reposting with censorship:
A common thread I’ve noticed with the MRA trolls here, and most of the posters back on the MRA websites, is that they will spew the nastiest insults they can think of, be deliberately obnoxious in every conceivable way, and then be shocked, SHOCKED, grabbing for the fainting salts, when women respond with anything harsher than, “Oh, poor baby, you’re sad! Let me make it all better!”
This, yes, exactly. It’s amazing how people will tell me that I’m an abusive bitch who doesn’t know her place and who no man could love, and then turn around and act like I’m the asshole because I dare to disagree. Sometimes I’m the asshole just for quoting them! (David certainly is.)
I’ve experienced this in real life, though. I had a roommate once who was giving me a loooong spiel about how everyone but Real True Christians is going to burn in the flames forever. And then she said my relatives who’d died in the Holocaust were in Hell.
I said “fuck you.”
She literally held her hand to her mouth and started quaking at this unbelievable, unwarranted insult that came out of nowhere and hurt her so deeply.
Holly: I’ve found that too. I don’t use the “fuck you” retort very often, because it does change the entire focus of the discussion, but there are times it’s the only answer.
And I am so amazed by how NOT A SINGLE PERSON HAS SAID THEY DON’T HATE WOMEN.
I mean, isn’t that your first line when called out on misogyny? Wouldn’t you say “Obviously I don’t hate women, but this challenge is unfair?” Or “Obviously I don’t hate women, but these people are misandrists?” Or “Obviously I don’t hate women, so it’s ridiculous to make me prove I don’t?”
Something along those lines? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?
@Ami,
“I mean I’ve alrdy gotten rape and death threats from vegetarians xD”
lol I’ve gotten the opposite: I’m a vegetarian who’s gotten rape and death threats from non-vegetarians who, er, like meat and want everyone else to? Or else they’ll force their “meat” on you? O_o
@Holly,
That is…just…yeah, “fuck you” about sums that up. My great grandmother has a cleaning lady who said that all the tornadoes happening in the US this spring were a sign of the “End Times”. My great grandmother, who never swears and who herself is Christian, said “Bullshit!” I mean, that’s not quite as bad as what your roommate said, but still along the lines of these-people-deserved-to-die-because-the-Bible-says-so.
Alex – I know it’s flippant, but I’m imagining something along with lines of: “You’re compost! COMPOST!! You’re going to be pushing up potatoes… uh, I mean carrots! Damn it, those stay in the ground… uh… broccoli! Yeah!”
lol! It was more like asserting that “vegetarians are hot” or “easy sluts” who are “just waiting for the right sausage”, which led to things like “How about I give you some of my meat? I bet you’d like that” or “You’re made of meat; you probably taste good” and “I don’t eat vegetables; my food does though”. Hmm, I think Zombie needs to have a chat with some of these guys…
Alex: *facepalm* I have to say, anti-vegetarian bigotry might not be one of the important bigotries, but it’s annoying as fuck.
I didn’t realize until just now how much I’ve missed TitforTat and his arguing in bad faith.
And by ‘how much’, I mean ‘not at all.’
T4T, I’ll take you seriously when you can post a link to a comment you have made on a popular MRM blog wherein you tell MRAs to behave similarly, or make some pithy comment about anger or hate being unhelpful or detrimental to one’s cause.
My introduction to the MRM was twofold:
1) 3 years ago I came across a slightly unhinged person called petersmh ( you may now know him as Peter andrew Nolan) who began writing more and more incoherent stories to “men” on the Sydney morning herald blogs
2) I started working in the same office as an MRA. Now, normally MRAs won’t out themselves in the workplace, but this one did. He liked to ring newspapers and media outlets during office hours to complain about their misandry amongst other more bizarre activities.
In the meantime, I have read a lot about the manosphere and MRA blogs and see some legitimate concerns, particularly around the area of father’s rights, but my major conclusion is that the MRM doesn’t know what it wants, the men in the MRM as a collective often want completely polar opposite things, and they attract an alarming number of mentally unstable and/or socially awkward men who can’t be called out on
their mental stability/social awkwardness as that is “shaming language”.
“Also, what’s with that guy in the bear suit giving the dude a blowjob?”
Ghosts of Furry conventions past? 😀
I didn’t realize until just now how much I’ve missed TitforTat and his arguing in bad faith.(Vvs)
I give you guys more credit. The bulk of the MRA’s are just too stupid. You actually know better. Im so glad you missed me. 🙂
I like how he left out:
“And by ‘how much’, I mean ‘not at all.’”
XD
I have to give him credit for doing the meta- “quoting dishonestly” to somebody saying that he’s dishonest thing xD
and by give him credit I mean…
cats! :3
Also dogs 😀
Actually what was equally scary is the anti-vegetarian trolls that actually agreed w/ me and were all hateful towards vegetarians too xD
Apparently I stepped into a world I had no idea existed w/ my satire xD
I was actually vegetarian for a bunch of years… but I can’t keep it up right now cuz of recovery from my ED : I can’t put restrictions on what I eat or what I can convince myself to eat, or I backslide completely and start to not eat nething again 🙁
I am back! It was a long day of travel, and a bunch of comments piled up in the old moderation queue, but they are all up now, including three from some evil chicken dude who thinks I am afraid of posting his profound thoughts. And a few from other people as well; I think they’re all on this page. Scroll up to read them!
I thought all feminists were afraid of the cock. /s
I’m fucking terrified of mine.
Super Evil Chicken: Man Boobz might fail the reddit MRA test but that’s not the issue, is it?
The question is where are the MRA blogs that are, “moderate” and “reasonable”.
We keep hearing about them, but no one is ever willing to share them with us.
Not even you seem willing to do it, which leaves us with no conclusion but that MRAs are sexist, misogynist, and often misandrist.