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Man Boobz Summer Video Fest 2: Steve on skidmarks

The Man Boobz Summer Video Fest continues with this contribution from some dude named Steve entitled “Women and Skidmarks.” More specifically, Steve explains why he thinks  women are a bunch of hypocrites for criticizing men who have skidmarks on their underpants. He clearly feels quite passionate about this grave injustice.

EDITED TO ADD: Bee has provided a helpful transcript of Steve’s remarks. But really, it wouldn’t kill you to click it. It’s really more amusing to see a guy say all this with a straight face.

Here’s the transcript:

Perfection issue that women have with guys. And I see this more with women than anybody else. Women are so obsessed, like, with finding the quote perfect guy, as if like they’re perfect themselves? You know, I was thinking about this. What are the statistical odds of women not having skidmarks on their underwear? It’s like, maybe a 0.01 percent chance. You know, I was watching this episode this one time of “Sex and the City.” And, I think it was the redheaded girl, Amanda, maybe, her name was? The redheaded girl on the show, her boyfriend Steve had skidmarks on his underwear and she found them, and she’s like EWWW. You know? And of course she doesn’t have skidmarks on her underwear, and she can do no wrong, right? And that’s the kind of thing that we’ve been so conditioned with, us men have to somehow be so perfect, and we don’t meet up to your expectations, but somehow we have to put up with all the women’s bullshit. And it’s really irritating to me how you, how women — how guys have just come to accept this fact.

Amanda is definitely my favorite character on Sex and the City. Well, her and Tinky Winky. And Tiffany. And of course Mr. Roper.

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vacuumslayer
10 years ago

I’m sorry, I cannot bring myself to watch a video about skidmarked drawers. I shall rely on my fellow posters to fill me in..

Amnesia
Amnesia
10 years ago

I had to look up what ‘skidmarks’ were. And seriously? It’s now an injustice to be expected to properly wipe your ass?

As for hypocrisy, if that guy somehow has a girlfriend, I hope she gives him some of her period-stained underwear to wash and records his reaction.

Kave
Kave
10 years ago

NWOslave has found a new best bud.

filetofswedishfish
10 years ago

I got 5 seconds in, and had to stop. That dude’s voice! Ack!

MissPrism
10 years ago

I am in a quandary. I cannot click it. I simply refuse to spend any minutes of my life watching some numpty bang on about poo-stripes on YouTube.
And yet I also refuse to believe that anyone with sufficient presence of mind to breathe regularly for years on end would record a poo-stripe video of this kind, and then I want to click it just to prove to myself that such a thing CANNOT BE.
*holds head in hands and shakes uncontrollably*

SWGM
SWGM
10 years ago

I am not going to watch some weirdo’s tirade about poo stains. Would a braver soul than I provide a transcript, please?

dan
dan
10 years ago

Amnesia

It’s an injustice to be expected to do one’s own laundry….

Shohuku
Shohuku
10 years ago

I am cracking up.

Bee
Bee
10 years ago

Oh crap. Okay, I did it.

His thesis seems to be that women expect men to be totally perfect, and yet are flawed beings themselves.

He bases this on an episode of “Sex and the City.”

Also: Just for the record, I … I don’t have skidmarks. (If I ever were to have one, I would throw away that pair of undies, or bleach them but good.) And yet I am far from perfect and so is my bare-ballin’ boyfriend. Whatever.

Joanna
10 years ago

…I don’t have skid marks… It’s not difficult to achieve relatively clean underwear…

Shohuku
Shohuku
10 years ago

The privilege, of course, is that he can use “I’m a man” as an excuse for any disgusting behavior. Women who don’t like to see skidmarks are just perfectionists .Of course nobody would like ot see stains on anyone’s underwear, regardless of gender. Let alone touch them (if she was washing them ).

Snowy
Snowy
10 years ago

I’ve had skidmarks on my underwear… when I was 5 years old. Seriously, there’s nothing about being male that prevents you from taking care of basic hygiene. That’s really not “expecting perfection”.

Bee
Bee
10 years ago

TRANSCRIPT:

Perfection issue that women have with guys. And I see this more with women than anybody else. Women are so obsessed, like, with finding the quote perfect guy, as if like they’re perfect themselves? You know, I was thinking about this. What are the statistical odds of women not having skidmarks on their underwear? It’s like, maybe a 0.01 percent chance. You know, I was watching this episode this one time of “Sex and the City.” And, I think it was the redheaded girl, Amanda, maybe, her name was? The redheaded girl on the show, her boyfriend Steve had skidmarks on his underwear and she found them, and she’s like EWWW. You know? And of course she doesn’t have skidmarks on her underwear, and she can do no wrong, right? And that’s the kind of thing that we’ve been so conditioned with, us men have to somehow be so perfect, and we don’t meet up to your expectations, but somehow we have to put up with all the women’s bullshit. And it’s really irritating to me how you, how women — how guys have just come to accept this fact.

amandajane5
10 years ago

Really? Women are horrible perfectionists because they expect you to properly WIPE YOUR ASS?! You’re proudly defending your right to LEAVE SHIT-STAINS in your UNDERPANTS?! And the problem is that women don’t like it when you do that?!

Un-fucking-believable.

filetofswedishfish
10 years ago

It’s irritating to him that men have to learn to not shit their pants a little? Or have to accept to thoroughly wipe their own asses?

Papr1ka
Papr1ka
10 years ago

The comments are just priceless…particularly from “adamndirtyshame”. I really hope he’s just trolling.

“wash my ass in the shower???? what am i, a homosexual??? skidmarks are my birthright as a man, every pair of underpants and pants i own has at least a little (and sometimes a lot), its beyond my control dummy. wash my ass, what the hell???”

[The username is starting to seem a little ironic…]

“excuse me ma’am, but butts are supposed to smell like shit, thats why its my butt and not my penis (which smells like urine). fortunately, NOBODY except for maybe my dog is gonna be sniffing MY ass anytime soon. why would a straight man like myself be worried about anal decay? its not like i use my butt for anything other than pooping, so it dont matter what it looks like. what i do and dont do with my butt is my business, and if any superficial woman wont date me b/c of it its their loss.”

[Oh dear. Those “superficial women” are missing out on their prize. When will they learn?]

“you’re so quick to judge me for allegedly smelling like crap, but then do u expect me to put up with the overwhelming stench of women’s perfume?? you claim my dung is toxic, but at least its all natural, not chemicals made by some scientist. btw im not worried about getting salmonella from my dung, because i dont eat it. thats gross u would even think that. and maybe u dont understand it as a woman, but men are strong and can deal with pain, such as inflammed, decaying anuses. life’s tough!”

[Secretly, women bemoan the great lack of Real Men (TM) who allow themselves to develop “inflamed, decaying anuses” simply for the sake of proving their manliness. Those skid marks are a real symbol to us! Wear them with pride!]

“if i took your advice and used perfume to cover up my alleged anal smell, i could possibly kill someone via an allergic reaction to perfume. EVERYONE IN THE WORLD POOPS. we’ve all smelled our own, and if you cant admit that youre a hypocrite and/or a hypochondriac. sorry if its the latter, but smelling doody has never KILLED anybody. keep your perfume lady.”

[Yeah, they should really ban that hazardous perfume. Whenever I wear any, people just drop like flies around me. It’s super dangerous.]

“the reason women dont give every men oral anymore is because of feminazism, lesbianazism, bi-nazism, reverse sexism, reverse homophobia, pretty much reverse everything. the world doesnt make sense anymore. its illegal to discriminate against women (which i agree with btw im not a pig), but perfectly LEGAL to discriminate against men, in this case with oral sex. in america we have the freedom to wash ourselves as we see fit. didnt the holocaust have mandatory showers too?”

[Like many, many MRAs, our friend here has found a way to connect a seemingly small issue with Nazism, which is what anything that a woman does draws from. I wonder if there’s another, smellier reason that women seem to be unwilling to give him oral…]

Amnesia
Amnesia
10 years ago

Haven’t any of these guys heard of toilet paper?

zombie rotten mcdonald
10 years ago

“the reason women dont give every men oral anymore is because of feminazism, lesbianazism, bi-nazism, reverse sexism, reverse homophobia, pretty much reverse everything. the world doesnt make sense anymore. its illegal to discriminate against women (which i agree with btw im not a pig), but perfectly LEGAL to discriminate against men, in this case with oral sex. in america we have the freedom to wash ourselves as we see fit. didnt the holocaust have mandatory showers too?”

Dude, you might get oral sex more often if your crotch wasn’t so stanky.

Holly Pervocracy
Holly Pervocracy
10 years ago

I don’t know how to break it to this guy, but my undies don’t have skidmarks. See, after I go poopie, I clean my butt until there is no poopie left on it. I’m not trying to be smug or superior here; it’s just something I learned at, you know, age two or so.

I also know a lot of guys who also somehow manage to have poopie-free butts and they are neither gay, perfect, nor magical.

I’m also not looking for “the perfect guy,” as this would imply a guy who is immortal and who sneezes money and pees fine wine. I am looking for “the perfect guy for me,” as in, my best match.

And shit, even if he does have skidmarks, if he has skidmarks and is a nice person who takes me seriously and doesn’t go on crazy poop rants, I don’t really care that much. I won’t pretend to like the shit-smears themselves, but I won’t really hold them against him.

…especially not literally.

summer_snow
summer_snow
10 years ago

@ Papr1ka: That’s gotta be a Poe. I don’t suppose his name is spelled “aDAmNDiRTYSHAME”?

Papr1ka
Papr1ka
10 years ago

summer_snow:

I think you might be right. Oh well, it made me laugh either way. It’s just “adamndirtyshame”, all lowercase though.

PosterformerlyknownasElizabeth

Maybe he heard about the riot that happened at some wedding when a guy who was wearing a kilt wrecked a wedding dress by leaving more then the bride was expecting.

Holly Pervocracy
Holly Pervocracy
10 years ago

I also want to point out that not only are the characters of “Sex and the City” fictional, not only are they frequently written by men, but they are fictional representations of only four women–who are acknowledged to have various quirks and flaws–not of Womanity In General.

Also, a little FYI to the guys:
My default state, the one I spend 99%-100% of my life in and the one I’m starting from right now, is “not blowing you.” Don’t get me wrong; I blow guys and I like it. But having your dick in my mouth is not my ground state.

Therefore, if you wish to have your dick in my mouth, I need a reason to do it. Merely invalidating a reason why I shouldn’t do it is insufficient. Blowjobs are matter of “decide to do,” not “don’t decide not to do.”

So if your best case for blowing you is “I have shit-stains and I smell like poop, but you’re a stuck-up bitch if you care about things like that,” then I must respectfully decline, not because of the poop thing, but because no positive case has been made.

Holly Pervocracy
Holly Pervocracy
10 years ago

I’m so glad this video is shot from the shoulders up.

PMScapades
10 years ago

You know, I don’t think the “perfect man” exists. I don’t expect my husband to be perfect. I do, however, expect him to wipe his ass thoroughly. Is that too much to ask?

I think this dude has confused two different issues in his head. While I don’t think they constitute a majority of the female population, I have indeed met women who were holding out for the “perfect man” and had impossibly high standards for potential mates. I’ve met even more men with such unrealistic expectations for the women they date. “No skidmarks” was never on the list, though, because it’s pretty much expected in civilized society that adults know how to properly clean themselves after defecating.

I could maybe see complaining about women who require their significant others to make over $100k/year or drive a particular expensive car, but basic hygeine? Really? THIS is where you make your stand?

Pyena
Pyena
10 years ago

What the hell…?

Is this guy seriously complaining about something that is BASIC HYGIENE?

And the comments section is surprisingly for this. Just about every comment that is in favor of not going around smelling like shit is hidden because of downvotes.

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

HAHAHA! How on Earth does not being able to wipe your own ass correlate with women’s bullshit? As friend says, “you gotta erase what you write.” I guess these guys want the freedom to be completely fucking nasty. OK, but don’t wonder why no one wants to date you.

Damn, this is too funny.

mediumdave
mediumdave
10 years ago

I have indeed met women who were holding out for the “perfect man” and had impossibly high standards for potential mates… I’ve met even more men with such unrealistic expectations for the women they date.

Sure! But this is the thing that I don’t get… those people aren’t the majority of either gender. So why do people like “Steve” constantly harp on this tiny subset of humanity? It’s their loss, if they’re like that. You would think, anyway.

Xtra
Xtra
10 years ago

Hoca’s example falls a bit flat do to the fact that she married the guy and had a kid with him. What exactly was the horrible penalty for skid marks?

Bee
Bee
10 years ago

This guy has a buncha crap on youtube that further explains his worldview. I just got done watching this much longer one, in which he goes over why Muslims are right (in respect to women, at least), hypergamy, and the good ol’ days when men ruled the world.

That last one: Okay. So, his point is that in the ’70s, when he was a kid, he would hear his parents telling their single friends, “Hey, I know this nice girl for you.” And therefore, back when men ruled the world, no one was single. Maybe a man in a wheelchair wouldn’t be able to find a girl, but other than that, pretty much everyone was paired off, and life was beautiful.

The fuck? (1) People still try to fix up their single friends. Most of the time, they are (as Steve’s parents were in their day) seen as busybodies. But the larger point: (2) If Steve can’t find a woman who will pair up with him, this is not the fault of Ohio not being run as a Muslim dictatorship, nor of all women only making themselves available to the most Bradpittian of men. This is probably the fault of (a) Steve not liking women very much, (b) Steve thinking he should date only virtuous underwear models, and (c) Steve not being very interesting or likeable.

On the upside, I just found an awful website called love-shy.com, which appears to full of awful people I can make fun of. BRB.

mediumdave
mediumdave
10 years ago

What exactly was the horrible penalty for skid marks?

Criticism! The worst thing that can happen to any man! 😀

speedlines
speedlines
10 years ago

MRA’s do love their Sex And The City.

PosterformerlyknownasElizabeth

I am sure that one day Steve will find the one woman on the planet who is somehow a super hot model and uncaring about basic hygiene. Until then, buy some damn toilet paper!

Holly Pervocracy
Holly Pervocracy
10 years ago

Criticism! The worst thing that can happen to any man!

Being not-fucked. Not-fucking a guy is the worst thing a woman can do to a man, doncha know? Women should only not-fuck guys who’ve, like, committed war crimes or something. To not-fuck an innocent man is a travesty.

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

Holly, what about the spitting?

Marc
Marc
10 years ago

I am in a quandary. I cannot click it. I simply refuse to spend any minutes of my life watching some numpty bang on about poo-stripes on YouTube.

It’s just one minute. And though it’s about poo-stripes — and I certainly disagree with the author — it’s really an interesting standpoint and an intellectually challenging analysis, I think it’s totally worth ones time.

summer_snow
summer_snow
10 years ago

@ David: Could you put Bee’s transcript into the post? A lot of people want to read the transcript instead of watching the creepy video, and it’s going to get lost in the comments shuffle.

filetofswedishfish
10 years ago

“… it’s really an interesting standpoint and an intellectually challenging analysis, I think it’s totally worth ones time.”

The thing is? It isn’t any of those things. It’s gross, sort of lazy, and just all-around off putting.

summer_snow
summer_snow
10 years ago

Yay! Thank you, David!

MissPrism
10 years ago

Bee, you are a veritable saint. Thank you so much for the transcript!

And Holly, the not-fucking comment made me laugh tea out of my nose. Do you know there are 3 BILLION women in the world and almost all of them not-fuck almost ALL the men, making 9*10e18 not-fuckings EVERY DAY. This is an injustice beside which all others pale.

Notzy
Notzy
10 years ago

Only omegas have shitstains on their underwear. Female and male. That’s why you only toss a fuck in them at night, with a bag over their heads, while dreaming of Angelina Jolie, when you’re desperate as fuck and your Fleshlight or vibrator’s broken.

Thankfully, between that and not being a fatass/creeper, anyone can get themselves promoted to at least beta territory and keep themselves from a life of grinding celibacy.

Bruce McGlory
10 years ago

“it’s really an interesting standpoint and an intellectually challenging analysis, I think it’s totally worth ones time.”

LOL Uh “I don’t wanna wipe my ass, mommy, but fuck me (and wash my shitty undies) anyway!!!” is in no way interesting or intellectually challenging.

ozymandias42
10 years ago

You know, if not-fucking someone who’s attracted to is a crime, we really need to arrest Johnny Depp for crimes against humanity…

Pecunium
10 years ago

ozy: There you go… pointing out the Alphas that all the women want.

I knew, sooner or later, one of the women here would let the cat out of the bag and prove the Greek System is true.

Shohuku
Shohuku
10 years ago

Women don’t find men attractive , nor are there any men who women would like to have sex with but wouldn’t have sex with them, so Depp has committed no crime.

Homosexuals also don’t exist

arborealhead
arborealhead
10 years ago

“perfectly LEGAL to discriminate against men, in this case with oral sex”

Maybe the equal rights amendment would have passed if there was something about blow jobs in there.

law1204
law1204
10 years ago

I thought the worst thing you could do to a man was not look at him.

“Amanda is definitely my favorite character on Sex and the City. Well, her and Tinky Winky. And Tiffany. And of course Mr. Roper.”

You owe me a new keyboard, David!

I know my cat has a brain the size of a walnut and even HE cleans his own ass every time after he’s done in his litterbox. Can a simple animal be expected to be cleaner than these neanderthals?

(Note to Steve – if you don’t keep your bum clean and dry, you can get a painful and itchy yeast infection there or at least a very incomfortable inflamed skin rash that can sink into your skin and even creep up to the top of your butt cleavage. Poo is not good moisturizer! Leaving dingleberries wedged in your crack and not cleaning up after you drop the kids off at the pool can leave your skin feeling very, very sore! So invest in some TP and use it, Mmkay? It’s better than having to go to the doctor because your ass canyon feels like a river of Frank’s Red Hot is running through it.)

Marc
Marc
10 years ago

A lot of people want to read the transcript instead of watching the creepy video, and it’s going to get lost in the comments shuffle.

I just hope that people still watch the video, because they’ll really miss something if they just read the transcripts!
Though it sounds banal, a video is just a synthesis of picture, sound and content. And this synthesis is so well-elaborated here, I think, it would be a shame if people would miss this this experience.

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