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How the Other Half Lives, according to dudes who have no idea how the other half lives

Remember, T-Shirts are available!

It’s always handy when one of the MGTOW brethren sums up one of the tribe’s beliefs in a handy little post. The following is what every single MRTOWer out there (not to mention many MRAs and PUAs and even some non-acronymified misogynists) seems to believe about how women live their lives today. When I say “every single MGTOWer” I’m not really exaggerating for impact – well, maybe a teensy bit. But I don’t think I’ve ever run across an MGTOWer who doesn’t take all of the following on faith.

Like many manosphere beliefs about women – like the whole “women only fuck the top 20% of men” thing – there is of course not a shred of evidence for any of this. It’s an essentially religious belief, accepted on faith. MGTOWers are like monks in the douchiest religion ever.

Anyway, fresh from a post by “Rogue” on NiceGuy’s MGTOW forum, here’s how all you ladies are living your lives:

The modern woman’s life plan goes like this:

Step 1) From first sexual awakening throughout her twenties, fuck as many Alpha Asshole men (hereafter referred to as AA) as she can in a quest of sheer narcissistic hedonism. May give birth to an AA spawn during this time; party lifestyle and general female educative path (elementary teacher, social worker) results in shaky finances.

[citation needed]

Step 2) Oops, getting close to or past age 30? Find a Nice Guy Beta (hereafter referred to as NGB), dupe him into marriage with sex (he’s generally grateful for the attention, having had less than stellar success with women throughout his twenties), use his money to stabilize shaky finances. Strong likelihood of having another child or two; may again be AA spawn due to affairs. Pack on 30 pounds of fat (at least!). Cut off sex with NGB since she now has him over a barrel and was never really attracted to him in the first place. Get steadily angrier and more dissatisfied.

[citation needed]

Step 3) Divorce at or slightly before age 40; attempt to remount AA cock carousel, this time as a cougar. Fail miserably because no AA wants an old, fat female body and a loose pussy that looks like a hunk of roast beef that’s been worked over with a dozen ball-peen hammers for a month. Said failure twists her mind until her only remaining pleasure in life is to fuck with ex-NGB in various ways such as taking him back to court to raise CS payments, or denying him visitation rights to his children.

[citation needed]

 Step 4) Accept that she’s past her time for the AA cock carousel; become a companion to many cats.

[citation needed]

And what’s with all the cat-hatred, anyway? Cats are adorable, endlessly fascinating little monsters who do no harm to anyone, unless you count all the times my cat has attacked me without provocation and the fact that she just threw up her dinner and is now insistently demanding a second dinner. To paraphrase Samuel L. Jackson’s character in Jackie Brown, you can trust cats to be cats.

Anyway, back to the sermon:

The marriage strike is just an attempt to short-circuit steps 2 and 3, and force women to ride step 1 as long as they can, then transition directly to step 4. Will women like the result if, instead of rushing to save them at age 30, men just shake their heads and walk away? I think it’s an experiment worth trying.

Once again: please, please, please walk away. Walk far away. Become monks in your douchy religion. Just remember that most monks who take a vow of chastity don’t spend the rest of their lives whining about how women are a bunch of filthy bitches.

Oh, and before anyone pops in with a “why do you pick on the outliers, this guy doesn’t represent bla bla bla,” the post (which naturally got nothing but huzzahs on NiceGuy’s forum) was also highlighted on the MRA blog What Men Are Saying About Women as an example of “superb” discussion of the Woman Question. This bullshit is Manosphere-Approved bullshit.

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darksidecat
darksidecat
13 years ago

Why is this hypothetical woman the companion of her cats when she has three kids that she is apparantly raising?

Also, why social worker and elementary school teacher? While of course there are exceptions, in general women who pick elementary school teacher as a career path are somewhat traditional and social workers tend to start out as wide eyed idealist romantics (social workers end up as harrowed hard asses that could could run a city by themselves).

I can’t figure out why people can’t seem to figure out that people tend to date and marry people of similar economic class background. The rich date the rich, the poor date the poor, for the most part. Maybe it would be less dramatic in culture with less income gaps, but in the US, when the poor and rich date, there tend to be rather brutal cultural clashes. So, yeah, the broke unemployed people at the trailer park are getting laid and getting dates,with other broke people at the trailer park. Ditto for the rich people at the country club.

Victoria von Syrus
Victoria von Syrus
13 years ago

Oh, and I think the MRA counter to modern so-called ‘betas’ and ‘omegas’ not being able to find “reproductive success” in the current day and age is that it’s all feminism’s fault.

See, the betas and omegas are hard working, humble men who would have been able to establish a comfortable household with which they could use to attract a woman. Since women were financially dependent on getting married in many cases, they had little choice but to settle for the betas and omegas. And then they were trapped, because leaving their husbands, no matter how unhappy they were, meant social ostracism and penury.

And then Evil Feminism came along and decided it was kind of sucky for a woman to be coerced into marriage just to ensure financial survival. Because the Evil Feminists hate the betas and omegas, they decided it should be easier for women to leave an unsatisfying or downright abusive marriage, thereby depriving betas and omegas of their entitled female companionship.

So, basically, the self-described betas and omegas are butthurt they can’t own a woman anymore.

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

@darksidecat I think that they think social worker means “woman who cares about poor kids, like they are stray dogs, and go “awwwww, doggy has a boo boo” and dun rly care or have any sort of real understanding of what”s going on outside of “awww i feel badddd” and then goes home, relaxes and has a bubble bath and pedicure” xD

Samsara
Samsara
13 years ago

Victoria von Syrus, Good point. I had forgotten that the whole point of feminism was to hurt betas and omegas. How silly of me to think that making a woman financially independent was a good thing? ***dripping sarcasm***

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

See, the betas and omegas are hard working, humble men who would have been able to establish a comfortable household with which they could use to attract a woman. Since women were financially dependent on getting married in many cases, they had little choice but to settle for the betas and omegas. And then they were trapped, because leaving their husbands, no matter how unhappy they were, meant social ostracism and penury.

And then Evil Feminism came along and decided it was kind of sucky for a woman to be coerced into marriage just to ensure financial survival. Because the Evil Feminists hate the betas and omegas, they decided it should be easier for women to leave an unsatisfying or downright abusive marriage, thereby depriving betas and omegas of their entitled female companionship.

I think the other part you’re missing is that it’s not on a conscious “I have to do this to survive b/c I can’t work” level that women did it, but it’s genetically programmed into us xD So once feminism released us from having to marry beta/omega guys to survive, we STILL HAVE that instinct xD Like how some domestic animals may have some instincts from the past that they don’t need nemore…. I think the belief is like… “well women don’t need it, but their instinctive nature doesn’t know this, so they keep marrying up b/c it is hardwired into them” which leaves most of the population screwed xD That’s why in order to keep the survival of the human race going, we need to go back to when their instinct ensured that every man could have sex xD (b/c apparently almost no man is having sex now XD)

Sarah
Sarah
13 years ago

@Ami: I’m in the Washington DC area.

I think the stat sheet should include number of elephants owned, number of giraffes owned, star sign, inseam, hair color, number of hairs on head, number of near fatal accidents participated in, number of fatal accidents participated in, past number of sex partners, number of really cool looking scars, number of non-sixed sided dice owned, facial symmetry, muscle mass, max bench press, number of friends in high school, how far away does your mother live, is she even still alive, shoe size, glove size, hat size, wand hand.

Um. I could come up with questions for this all day!

@Victoria: PP is a good idea, and yeah, asking about mysterious bruises is legitimate and all. But when the responses are kind of… awkward it makes me feel uncomfortable. And I really want to have a medical professional to talk about all kinds of sex health stuff with.

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

@Samsara kinda like how the whole point of viruses apparently is to kill people as quickly and as brutally as possible xD This would make a fun RPG worldbook xD

Sarah
Sarah
13 years ago

Oohmygawd. I SO want to play a virus based rpg now. Where the character’s play as viruses navigating inside of a human’s immune system! The Goal: World Domination!1!!! Death and destruction!!!!

So cool.

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

@Sarah

So like this guy xD

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

Loose Pussy 1B

Enchant Creature

Enchanted creature cannot block and it’s power is reduced to 0.

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

Alpha Cock Carousel 4

Artifact

X X T: Tap X target creatures.

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

40 Year Old Hag 3B

Creature – Feminist

When 40 Year-Old Hag comes into play, put 3 1/1 cat counters into play under your control.

2/2

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

I think that the post marriage weight game thing should be called the Feminist Forty or something.. like the Freshman Fifteen xD

Feminist Forty U

Enchant Creature

Enchanted creature loses First Strike.

All creatures blocked or blocking enchanted creature gain First Strike until end of turn.

Pecunium
13 years ago

Wedding Weight?

Matrimonial Mass?

Wifey Widening?

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

I LOVE Matrimonial Mass xD

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

Matrimonial Mass could also mean the hour long lectures wives give a husbands to break them down about every little thing xD

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

That or it means gay marriage. xD tho that might be Mass. Matrimony xD

Pecunium
13 years ago

Marc: (and anyone else who cares about the reason the data for man/women and total partners is out of whack):

2. SEX AND LIES
We begin with an example which illustrates one of the major sources of error. Surveys of sexual behavior
consistently show a large gender discrepancy. Men re-port having had more female sex partners than women
report having had male sex partners. The difference ranges from a factor of 3 to 9 (see Wiederman [34] and
references therein). This discrepancy is repeated across many different surveys and countries (e.g., US, Britain, France, New Zealand and Norway). In a closed population with equal numbers of men and women, of course, this is impossible. The average lifetime number of heterosexual partners for men and women is the same. Thus, the surveys of men and women give independent estimates of the same quantity, yet those estimates are mutually inconsistent. Clearly, there are sources of significant error in one, the other or both of the estimates.

Further, since men reliably report more partners than women, in surveys performed in di fferent countries at different times and using diff erent methodologies, those errors appear to pull consistently in one direction. This strongly suggests that each of the surveys has the same source of error. There are various possibilities. Selection bias which excludes women who have had many male partners might occur for this di fference. Response bias, where women under- and men over-report their number of sexual partners, might also account for this error.

Morris [27] points out that the data has a heavytail distribution and most of the discrepancy is generated by a very small fraction of respondents who report large numbers of partners. Among the 90% of respondents who report having fewer than 20 partners the discrepancy between the reports of men and women all but disappears. This suggests a very simple explanation which accounts for most of the bias. The majority of women tell the truth, but perhaps under-report by a little. The majority of men also tell the truth, but perhaps over-report by a little. However, a small fraction of men tell whoppers: they exaggerate the number of partners they have had, not by a little, but by a lot. A man who claims to have had 100 lifetime sex partners (as about 1% in the dataset that Morris examines do) when the actual number is 50, adds enormous response error. It would take 16 men with the median number of partners understating by 2 to cancel this single 2 overstatement. Thus there is great asymmetry in the response error.

So, in short, a very small number of braggarts can skew the odds a lot.

At the other end (someone who vastly understated partner numbers) the variance would have to be widespread (and one sided) to not be lost into the median.

Pecunium
13 years ago

Same-sex marriage would be Homogamy.

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

@Pecunium Wilt Chamberlain claimed to have slept with 20,000 women xD I wonder if other guys claim that too xD (I feel like he’d prolly have been cited as some point to prove the Alpha thingie neways xD so I might as well bring him up now) I think that would prolly skew things quite a bit if somebody like that answered (much less many ppl xD )

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

@Pecunium or marrying yourself o_O

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

Darnit! I scrolled everything off the screen! >_<

Kirby, I have a ton of magyc cards on the previous page!

Pecunium
13 years ago

Ami, no… that would be autocthogamy. (maybe just autogamy, but I think that would mean one got married by volition, not coercion… I’m not really much of a Greek Scholar)

Greek is really nice that way.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
13 years ago

Ugh… I kinda don’t want to flavor these… Ah well, here goes nothing.

Loose Pussy: “She was known as Big Bertha. It was rumored that you could hear the wind whistling through the canyon whenever she walked by.”

Alpha Cock Carousel: “Step right up, Step right up, ride the Amazing Alpha Cock Carousel! In town for one week only! You won’t want to miss it!”

40 Year Old Hag: “The first thing you’ll hear is the mewing. The last thing you’ll want to see is their owner.”

Feminist Forty: “I’m not as quick as I used to be, or young, or pretty… Screw it, who needs men anyway?”

sarahejones
13 years ago

Yup, turning in my woman card now. I’m going to grad school in the fall and the Boyfriend didn’t go to college. He makes more than I do at the moment but once I complete my education that’ll change. AND I went and messed everything by getting a cat WHILE I was fucking whomever I wished to fuck, and the cat came with me when I moved in with the Boyfriend. So much for the lonely cat lady stereotype.