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The Gropes of Wrath

Evil woman oppressing men

In various countries around the world, women and teenage girls are regularly groped while riding commuter trains. This, I suspect, is not news to most of you; indeed, I know one reader of this blog who’s had this happen to her. In Japan, one survey found that two-thirds of female passengers in their twenties and thirties had been groped. Because the problem is so prevalent in that country — and the authorities are so ineffective at controlling it – some train lines have instituted women-only train cars in an attempt to cut down on groping (and on false accusations of groping as well).  “Women-only” train cars have also introduced, in a limited way, in India, where harassment of women in public – known as “Eve teasing” – is distressingly common.

So what’s more appalling – the fact that groping on trains is so common in Japan that two-thirds of young women commuters have had to endure it themselves, or the fact that a small number of train cars have been set aside for women in a fairly half-assed attempt to curtail some of this groping?

For a lot of MRAs, the latter. The subject came up on Reddit’s Men’s Rights subreddit recently, inspiring some of the regulars to fulminate against this allegedly misandrist outrage. Fatalistic pulled out the n-word and this facile comparision:

Here’s what I’m seeing here: “At least we let you in the back of the bus, nigger.”

ExpendableOne, meanwhile, managed to work in a staggering number of standard-issue MRA complaints into this one sentence:

I think it’s discrimination and subjugation entirely based on misandry, negative male type-casting/stereotyping and anti-male heterophobia.

Ztakn seemed to suggest that it was all part of some oddly indirect money-making scheme on the part of, I guess, women:

To keep it short they exploit and propagate fears not only demonizing men in society but also terrorizing women and scaring the shit out of them making them more paranoid than they need to be.

And then they do it for money.

How would that work exactly?

1) Get groped

2) Set up women-only train cars

3) ???

4) Profit?

Given that the Men’s Rights subreddit is one of the few Men’s Rights forums online that is not completely overrun with misogynist fanatics, there were others who responded more reasonably. Alienblonde noted:

In Japan it’s a massive problem where school girls get groped by older males on trains in peak hour.

Happened to me in Europe too when I was back packing. Some old Spanish guy sat beside me and decided to feel me up.

Women shouldn’t have to deal with this and unfortunately, until it stops happening, I think [women only train cars are] justified.

Naturally, this being a Men’s Rights forum, she quickly found herself the focus of a game of “blame the victim.” Fatalistic accused her of “[j]ustifying discrimination with this all men are potential criminals feminist dogma.”  When she pointed out that she was not, in fact, doing this, he moved on to castigating her for not making a public scene when she was groped:

You should out the people who actually do these things rather than treat the rest of us as criminals by default with disgusting bigoted policies and the back of the bus mentality.

When she pointed out that this could have put her in more serious danger, he merely scoffed:

You would have to be paranoid and spoonfed the most egregious of feminist women are helpless, men are unstoppable beasts that need other men with guns to drag them away dogma to believe that all but the most psychopathic would persist or try to harm you if you outed them to a crowd for their actions.

Easy for you to say.

Of course, when women DO confront sexual harassers on trains, as I noted in a post on the infamous New York Subway flasher last November, they get reactions like this sarcastic Reddit comment from one member of the men-are-oppressed club.

Yes, because obviously her heterophobia needs to be glorified… Penises are so disgusting and scary, obviously women should totally be justified in fearing them and there couldn’t possibly be any kind of misandry involved with such contempt, befuddlement or “helplessness/horror” to the mere sigh[t] of male anatomy. /s

Yep, if you’re a woman on a train, not wanting to have some random dude pull his penis out and rub it on you is “heterophobia.” Who knew?

In the case of the subway flasher, the alleged perp did indeed flee when confronted. (He was later arrested.) That’s pretty much the best-case scenario. But it’s hardly the only possible result, and it’s understandable why a woman riding the train to work (much less one backpacking alone in a foreign country) would hesitate to publicly accuse a groper of groping her. Having women-only train cars cuts down on the number of times women are put in this difficult situation.

Yes, in an ideal world, there would be no need for women-only train cars. In an ideal world, men wouldn’t grope women on trains.

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Amy
Amy
13 years ago

@NWO
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sukebe

sukebe is japanese. not a made up word that has no relevance. please learn how to use google.

Captain Bathrobe
Captain Bathrobe
13 years ago

I used to try to reason w/ NWO. Now I engage in more pleasant and productive pursuits, like sticking red hot needles in my eyes.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
13 years ago

But Captain, couldn’t you save time and effort by not putting red hot needles into your…. oohhhh….

Hippodameia
Hippodameia
13 years ago

There’s also swallowing broken glass, which doesn’t have as much prep time – it takes a while to get the needles hot enough.

Cactuar
Cactuar
13 years ago

Here, NWOslave, more made up words! I hope you take them to heart –

あんなにバカなことを言うならあんた本当にどうしようもないわ。
まったく!「スケベ」が本物の言葉じゃないだなんて!意味持っていないだなんて!あれ以上くだらないこと聞いたことのない!

しかも意見がたくさんあるのに、別に他人の状況をわかろうとしたわけない。日本やアメリカ、世界中のいろんな場所に住んでいる女性たちにとってこれは重体の問題です。セクハラされずに出かけることは権利だと思わない?

研究があるのに証明として認めないだと?

じゃ、この問題が本当に存在することを信じるのに、いったいどんな証拠がいいのか?

Spearhafoc, who is changing his nym
Spearhafoc, who is changing his nym
13 years ago

I really don’t know what to saw to a man who is objectively pro-groping. NWOslave is truly a detestable person.

Just because of you, buddy-boy, I’ll start rooting for our Illuminati (cough)Jewish(/cough) Overlords. Anybody you’re against is something I want to be a part of.

Spearhafoc, who is changing his nym
Spearhafoc, who is changing his nym
13 years ago

*say

Again, tired.

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

*offers chocomint giant big hugs* 🙁

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

@Spearhafoc we need baseball caps xD or jerseys.. xD

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

The Communist Sith Jewish Illuminati Feminists (did I miss nething? xD)

I want a #19 one with ANGELWINGS on the back 😀

Molly Ren
13 years ago

Spearhafoc, I’d love to see your rendition of Gary Oldman’s Dracula. He’s my favorite version.

Cactuar
Cactuar
13 years ago

Actually I have to add, too, that this topic is just so damn triggering for me. I have had this shit done to me so many times, pretty much ever since I hit puberty. It makes me freeze up and feel horrible and terrified and I want to punch people who brush it off like it’s no big deal.

And NWO, sorry for the moonspeak, but might I add that as a speaker, the stupidity inherent in your “sukebe is a made up word” bit was particularly annoying; on the Grand Scale of Irritation you are a few steps below those people who think speaking that racist caricature of the Chinese language at me is funny.

And your implication that because Japanese subway cars are packed as tight as sardine tins that women can’t tell the difference between someone bumping against them and humping/groping them? Is so stupid I’m at a loss as to how such mistakenness ougt be corrected.

Have you ever been in a place that crowded? I have. Have you ever had some jackass grab your ass while you were there? I have. It’s literally unmistakeable.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
13 years ago

Hey Cactuar, wanna post a translation for us non-made-up-language-speaking people? 😛 Inquisitive minds wish to know!

Laughing gull
Laughing gull
13 years ago

@Cactuar

Probably lost a bit in translation, but nicely said.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
13 years ago

And also giant non-groping hugs, Cactuar. I’ve never been through shit like this myself, but it seems absolutely absurd to suggest it doesn’t happen, or doesn’t happen a certain way…

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

I’m so sorry Cactaur 🙁 *offers hugs too* :

and ppl speaking fake Chinese is SO frustrating >_<;; They do that at me too Dx that and "where are you from?… no where are you REALLY from?" v_v

Cactuar
Cactuar
13 years ago

@Laughing Gull, thank you ^^ and yeah, I don’t know if I’ll ever get to native-speaker levels -_- Still working on it, though!

@Kirby, thanks as well, *reciprocal hugs*
I’ve been living in a rather small place for a while now so the incidence has dropped precipitously, but I’ve got no illusions that the environment in the more densely packed areas has gotten all that much better in my absence. In fact, I went into the city and dared to go to a bar for Halloween last year, and I got groped again! sigh.

And the Made Up Language? I’m not quite good enough to say everything I wanted to, so it was just a basic reply to that post of his:

If you’re going to say something that stupid, then there’s really no help for you.
Really! ” ‘sukebe’ isn’t a word?! ” “meaningless”?! I’ve never heard something that stupid!

And though you seem to have a lot of opinions, you’ve made no effort to understand others’ circumstances. To the women living in Japan and America, and many other places around the world, this is a serious problem. Don’t you think going out in public without getting sexually harassed is a right?

We’ve got research, but you won’t recognize it as proof, you say?

Well, what kind of proof would you need in order to believe that the problem exists?

Mr. Kobold
Mr. Kobold
13 years ago

“Would feminists demand my release because I “own” my sexuality? I won’t hold my breath.”

NWO, your sexuality probably just consists of lonely nights with your favorite domination porn that has a healthy amount of, given your beliefs about the Je-I mean Rothschilds, Germanic elements (not messing with Godwin’s law here).

But you do raise several unanswered questions of where your place is in your personal sexual dynamic. I mean, between your bondage worthy profile-pic, the conspiracy theories that everyone can tell are poorly typed on a keyboard that most be soaked with excited perspiration, and the fact that you crawl here everyday to have all the nonsense you spout rebuked and mocked, I wonder if you just like being abused? Be honest, do you find yourself salivating over being enslaved?

Does your sexuality consist of sweaty and lurid fantasies about black hawk helicopters filled with burly and husky MIBs swooping down upon you? Whisking you away and having their way with you in dark and secret Belgium bunkers that house global super computers?

Kind of “distasteful” if you ask me.

Alex
13 years ago

Hugs for all fellow people who have been groped! And for those who support us too, why not? No hugs for MRAs, though. I don’t want rabies.

Mr. Slave is starting to remind me of Bush: “The French have no word for ‘entrepeneur’.” lol Except I think at least when it comes to entertainment value, Bush is more likable than Mr. Slave is. Saying something, given how much I can’t stand that man.

Lyn
Lyn
13 years ago

And seriously – there is a freaking difference between wearing a skimpy outfit and actually flashing your genitals at someone (I can’t believe I’m explaining this). Hell, there’s even a difference between accidentally showing off bits that are usually kept hidden in mixed company (wardrobe fail), and someone deliberately flashing you or masturbating while looking at you…on a train. While you’re on your way to work. Also? The argument that if men wanted a grope they would go to a strip club (putting aside the fact that they would actually cost a rather different amount) – um, the gropers are probably on their way to work too, and want to get a grope in when they see a lady they like. It’s called convenience and knowing that they can get away with it.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
13 years ago

Now now Lyn, you know that all women are just begging to be groped. I mean, they aren’t wearing full-body, curve hiding suits covered with spikes, now are they?

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

*slumps* this is a sad triggery sobering thread :*( *offers big hugs to everybody*

Cactuar
Cactuar
13 years ago

Lyn, exactly.

They know they can get away with it… because what are you going to do? Really?

The guy at the bar last year, it was crowded, so I had to squeeze past him to get to the bar, and he grabbed my ass and squeezed. And then he apologized to me “For being so clingy” while refusing to let go of the hand I was strenuously trying to wrench from his grasp so I could get away. Ugh.

What are my options?
a) Yell at him and be the crazy bitch making a scene over nothing. He can claim he didn’t do it, and people, who will be annoyed that I’m harshing their buzz, probably won’t think it’s serious either way.

b) Hit him and be the crazy violent bitch making a scene over nothing. He can claim he didn’t do it, and people, who will be annoyed that I’m harshing their buzz, probably won’t think it’s serious either way.

c) Tell the bartender, who is probably male. The guy can claim he didn’t do it, and the bartender, who may be annoyed at being bothered when business is so high, might not think it’s serious enough to do anything about anyway.

d) Go upstairs to the second floor of the bar and try to forget about it.

I chose the last one, of course.

This stuff makes me extra frustrated with the “gay panic” defense. Guys who think they are perfectly justified in responding violently to the kind of thing they think women ought to just smile and deal with.

Eh, sorry. I get a bit ranty about this subject.

Laughing gull
Laughing gull
13 years ago

Kirbywarp, you may be on to something. Maybe not the curve hiding thing, but definitely like the idea of small, obscure spikes placed strategically and filled with stinky dye. Guess one could tell I’ve been groped also…

Cactuar
Cactuar
13 years ago

Or a membrane coated with habanero juice!