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The Gropes of Wrath

Evil woman oppressing men

In various countries around the world, women and teenage girls are regularly groped while riding commuter trains. This, I suspect, is not news to most of you; indeed, I know one reader of this blog who’s had this happen to her. In Japan, one survey found that two-thirds of female passengers in their twenties and thirties had been groped. Because the problem is so prevalent in that country — and the authorities are so ineffective at controlling it – some train lines have instituted women-only train cars in an attempt to cut down on groping (and on false accusations of groping as well).  “Women-only” train cars have also introduced, in a limited way, in India, where harassment of women in public – known as “Eve teasing” – is distressingly common.

So what’s more appalling – the fact that groping on trains is so common in Japan that two-thirds of young women commuters have had to endure it themselves, or the fact that a small number of train cars have been set aside for women in a fairly half-assed attempt to curtail some of this groping?

For a lot of MRAs, the latter. The subject came up on Reddit’s Men’s Rights subreddit recently, inspiring some of the regulars to fulminate against this allegedly misandrist outrage. Fatalistic pulled out the n-word and this facile comparision:

Here’s what I’m seeing here: “At least we let you in the back of the bus, nigger.”

ExpendableOne, meanwhile, managed to work in a staggering number of standard-issue MRA complaints into this one sentence:

I think it’s discrimination and subjugation entirely based on misandry, negative male type-casting/stereotyping and anti-male heterophobia.

Ztakn seemed to suggest that it was all part of some oddly indirect money-making scheme on the part of, I guess, women:

To keep it short they exploit and propagate fears not only demonizing men in society but also terrorizing women and scaring the shit out of them making them more paranoid than they need to be.

And then they do it for money.

How would that work exactly?

1) Get groped

2) Set up women-only train cars

3) ???

4) Profit?

Given that the Men’s Rights subreddit is one of the few Men’s Rights forums online that is not completely overrun with misogynist fanatics, there were others who responded more reasonably. Alienblonde noted:

In Japan it’s a massive problem where school girls get groped by older males on trains in peak hour.

Happened to me in Europe too when I was back packing. Some old Spanish guy sat beside me and decided to feel me up.

Women shouldn’t have to deal with this and unfortunately, until it stops happening, I think [women only train cars are] justified.

Naturally, this being a Men’s Rights forum, she quickly found herself the focus of a game of “blame the victim.” Fatalistic accused her of “[j]ustifying discrimination with this all men are potential criminals feminist dogma.”  When she pointed out that she was not, in fact, doing this, he moved on to castigating her for not making a public scene when she was groped:

You should out the people who actually do these things rather than treat the rest of us as criminals by default with disgusting bigoted policies and the back of the bus mentality.

When she pointed out that this could have put her in more serious danger, he merely scoffed:

You would have to be paranoid and spoonfed the most egregious of feminist women are helpless, men are unstoppable beasts that need other men with guns to drag them away dogma to believe that all but the most psychopathic would persist or try to harm you if you outed them to a crowd for their actions.

Easy for you to say.

Of course, when women DO confront sexual harassers on trains, as I noted in a post on the infamous New York Subway flasher last November, they get reactions like this sarcastic Reddit comment from one member of the men-are-oppressed club.

Yes, because obviously her heterophobia needs to be glorified… Penises are so disgusting and scary, obviously women should totally be justified in fearing them and there couldn’t possibly be any kind of misandry involved with such contempt, befuddlement or “helplessness/horror” to the mere sigh[t] of male anatomy. /s

Yep, if you’re a woman on a train, not wanting to have some random dude pull his penis out and rub it on you is “heterophobia.” Who knew?

In the case of the subway flasher, the alleged perp did indeed flee when confronted. (He was later arrested.) That’s pretty much the best-case scenario. But it’s hardly the only possible result, and it’s understandable why a woman riding the train to work (much less one backpacking alone in a foreign country) would hesitate to publicly accuse a groper of groping her. Having women-only train cars cuts down on the number of times women are put in this difficult situation.

Yes, in an ideal world, there would be no need for women-only train cars. In an ideal world, men wouldn’t grope women on trains.

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Nobby
13 years ago

Not three? Three’s supposed to be pretty rad.

Captain Bathrobe
13 years ago

You could always dress up like a pirate. Then you’d be “that pirate guy.” It might get you invited to a couple of parties, who knows?

/only half kidding.

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

So what is your life right now in your every day life like? Like when you go out, what happens to you that you feel oppressed by? And how would that be different if you were female?

You seem rly unable to articulate why one is better than the other o:

And if you were female, do you assume you’d be hot? If not, how would you achieve this. And how do you think doors open for you?

Given that there’s a giant chasm between what you keep saying and what ppl here are saying and ppl have trouble understanding… : I think the easiest way rather than have you dismiss everybody’s sharing of their lives and experiences over, would be for you to tell US what your worldview is…

FOR EXAMPLE

I’m female, size 0, 5’8″, have gotten modelling gigs as I’ve said :3 what’s my life like? what’s it like to be me? say when I go out to the mall or something? or if I was in the elevator (i dun even KNOW what that incident was xD ppl just keep saying “elevator”) or in another situation you feel oppressed in?

Nobby
13 years ago

@CaptainBathrobe Hey, it worked for Alan Tudyk.

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

@Captain Bathrobe it would add an air of mystique! And ppl would be like “omg, I wonder how he got that! maybe he’s like nick fury! I heard he’s so badass he got it in prison in a knife fight and the other guy got his spine ripped out for his trouble!” I mean, as long as he keeps it consistent which eye the patch was over xD

Captain Bathrobe
13 years ago

In a more serious vein, MRAL, you really have 3 choices, when it comes to physical characteristics: 1) You can do what you can to change them (cosmetic surgery, if possible); 2) you can stew in your own juices and hate the rest of the world while you become increasingly bitter and isolated; or 3)you can get the fuck over it and make the best go of life with what you’ve got.

Which sounds like the best option to you?

PosterformerlyknownasElizabeth
PosterformerlyknownasElizabeth
13 years ago

So you feel like one now MRAL-how would it be much different?

But it would be more socially acceptable in your myopic view.

Captain Bathrobe
13 years ago

Exactly, Ami. College is the place to let your eccentricity run wild. I suspect, however, that our boy takes himself far too seriously to attempt anything of the sort.

Life gets much better when you stop trying to please the cool kids and start hanging with the interesting people instead. But you already knew that, didn’t you Ami? 🙂

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

@Captain Bathrobe that’s why I’m here! 😀 (tho the ppl here are interesting AND cool! besides nebody I like to be around is cool, b/c I am the queen of cool 😀 )

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
13 years ago

MRAL, I’m gonna ask the same question that ami and Elizabeth have been asking, in a slightly more concrete way. Describe one instance where you were “spit upon,” then describe how you think that situation would go if the genders were reversed.

The reason we’re asking is because we don’t think you have the right idea about what being a woman is like, but so far all you’ve done is made very abstract assertions, like “Get hot and you get institutional preference to, like being hired for shit.” We can’t try to correct your view because you haven’t given us anything. So describe one situation you’ve been in as it would be if you were a woman, and perhaps the women here will be able to help you understand a bit better what life is actually like for them.

Captain Bathrobe
13 years ago

I am the queen of cool 😀

Of that I have no doubt. 🙂

Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
13 years ago

Okay. If I was a woman in the elevator talking to a man, I am 99% sure I would have received a smile and an enthusiastic hi, even if I was fat (which I wouldn’t be). Certainly the likelihood of being snubbed would be exponentially lower, because it is seen as acceptable to be rude to second-class men but not wymyn.

Pecunium
13 years ago

I notice that my comment about my eyes being, “deformed” went right past him, again.

So it really is, “all about him”. All the specific questions I asked were as nothing to how bad his eye is, compared to mine.

And… all suggestions about ways to deal with it… also dismissed.

So, MRAL: Do you think there is anything you could do to cope with the raw deal you got? Because you have only a few choices. Cope, or wallow in your misery.

Me… I got a couple of raw deals too. You don’t hear me bitching about them (much). I’d be happier if I didn’t have them, but I’m not dead, and while I’m handicapped, I’m not crippled.

Things like that; the bitter apathy, are why I call you spoiled. I don’t mean you have it easy, or that you don’t work; but you have a list of things you want handed to you.

And you expect us to accept that you keep to a double standard (if your Greek System is real, then you are an Omega, and don’t deserve the attention of Alpha/Beta women; but you scorn the “omega” women, as being beneath you. That’s a double standard. I don’t like double standards. They are the tools and rationalisations of spoiled brats and hypocrites).

Sorry. I’m not going to do that. So I’ll keep asking you questions, when you trot out this nonsense.

As Socrates said, the unexamined life is not worth living.

Plymouth
Plymouth
13 years ago

I’ve been ignored in elevators lots of times. But this is a GOOD THING! I don’t ride elevators for the scintillating conversation – I ride them to get to another floor 😛

Plymouth
Plymouth
13 years ago

p.s. – the tongue smiley sucks.

Laughing gull
Laughing gull
13 years ago

I’ve been snubbed on elevators before when I merely said hello to someone where I work. Figured the man was preoccupied. Actually it did hurt my feelings for just a minute, but had to get over it.

Pecunium
13 years ago

Plymouth: I’ve ignored people (even men) in elevators lots of times. I dislike the sense of forced comaraderie that someone saying, “hello” in a locked room induces.

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

Since he is ignoring my questions (or being surprisingly (suspiciously? xD ) economical with his answers to me, like he’s a kid who didn’t study for a presentation or test “In conclusion, Libya is a land of contrast.” xD )…

What type of reaction do you think I get if I choose to talk to a stranger? Like if I saw a handsome guy in an elevator and said hi? 😮

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

@Plymouth xD srsly.. like the right facing o: smiley turns into 😮

xD

Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
13 years ago

Another example. I was passed over what was (to me) a very important internship a few weeks back for a FUCKING IDIOT simply because she was female (that’s actually the reason I reached this website; I Googled “misandry in society” and was eventually linked here from an MRA forum. I’ve been an MRA for a long time, but this intensified my passion). I’m an economics/English double major and pretty much know what I want to do with my life, and this would have been a huge plus on my resume. She was dumb as shit, I talked to her a few times and literally, you could tell. Her GPA was in the high 2’s and she had zero work experience. No I didn’t look at her resume, but I KNOW FOR A FACT I was better qualified than she was, and the company, which shall not be named, has a history of affirmative action, so FUCK THEM. FUCK THOSE FUCKS.

Laughing gull
Laughing gull
13 years ago

See MRAL? It was probably Pecunium who snubbed me. But I still like him and he makes some really great points.

Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
13 years ago

She was also a bit taller than me, so I’m sure heightism came into play somewhere, as well.

Mr. Kobold
Mr. Kobold
13 years ago

Hasn’t MRAL’s eye nonsense been settled, didn’t he post a pic of it back here?

http://manboobz.com/2011/05/26/hating-female-sexuality-is-it-normal/

Ami Angelwings
13 years ago

@kobold yeah : but it didn’t take xD

Mr. Kobold
Mr. Kobold
13 years ago

“FUCK THEM. FUCK THOSE FUCKS.”

Keyboard breakdown bingo!

“She was also a bit taller than me, so I’m sure heightism came into play somewhere, as well.”

http://static.funnyjunk.com/pictures/473f379a_11d8_a8600.jpg

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