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Off-topic Saturday: Meet the Searchers (again)

Not THESE searchers.

I don’t know if anyone else is as interested in this as I am, but I am perpetually fascinated by the weird search terms that have led people to this site. Currently trending: cats and sperm — sometimes at the same time — as you can see from these recent search terms:

men dressed as sexy cats pics

 i want to hug your sperm

cat women with spermy faces

But not everyone coming here is interested in cats, people who dress as cats, or sperm (with or without cats involved). Here are some other topics that tickle their fancies:

snow white doing blow

rapist unicorns

do women like it if guys get boners

And perhaps my favorite:

ascii boner

Note to readers: I am not interested in seeing your boner, in ascii or in any other format.

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Laura
Laura
13 years ago

“Personally I like being objectified and I like objectifying men. Mmmm, sexy cat men

I suppose that could be filed under “reasons I don’t call myself a feminist”.”

Feminists objectify people. Everyone objectifies people. It’s natural. What isn’t natural is grouping everyone together because of their looks as alphas and omegas and not considering them as a person. As well as assuming everyone is attracted to some bullshit beauty standard and real people aren’t good enough.

I will proudly call myself feminist and appreciate hot guys. If someone wants to claim the ‘feminist’ label as being some anti-hot-guy parade then I’ll be the first to call bullshit.

Also, what is supposed to be wrong with searching for sexy women, MRAL?

Denia
13 years ago

To appreciate someone’s looks, to find them attractive, to feel sexual attraction and desire is not the same as sexual objectification.

Johnny Pez
13 years ago

Isn’t that what catnip is? Cat Blow?

Or perhaps I was thinking of Cat Ballou.

Dave G
Dave G
13 years ago

MRAO: If you are not going to take it quietly, why not fuck off somewhere and go do something about it, rather than give me a headache?
In terms you can understand – fuck off, omega. The grown ups are talking.
Your better world sounds like such a wonderful place. I wonder if anyone actually wants to join you in it?

Simone Lovelace
Simone Lovelace
13 years ago

I am 99% sure that MRAO is a meta-troll who is mocking MRAL.

Johnny Pez
13 years ago

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but I did a search for that 3rd search term I mentioned, the one about cat women, and, well, rule 34 applies.

You don’t have to go searching the internet for cat woman porn. Fritz Leiber covered that back in 1964 in The Wanderer.

Men's Rights Activist Overlord
Men's Rights Activist Overlord
13 years ago

Though this may sound melodramatic, I have determined that by posting on Manboobz I am taking the fight to the heart of the enemy. The fymynyst blygosphyre is perhaps the most EXPLICIT manifestation of misandry in society, a pulsing black heart of sorts that partially feeds the more UNCONSCIOUS misandry in everyday society. Certainly no the only slimy black root, but it’s one. My time here, I have decided, is well spent.

johnnykaje
13 years ago

Are we talking about the original Cat People or the Malcolm McDowell remake? The latter was too incesty and David Bowie-y for my taste.

schism
schism
13 years ago

I am 99% sure that MRAO is a meta-troll who is mocking MRAL.

Short of an IP check, there’s no way to tell, honestly. Poe’s Law applies to everything on the internet these days.

ozymandias
ozymandias
13 years ago

Is it bad that I actually know what the ascii penis thing is referring to?

It’s a Roissy/Citizen Renegade thing, where he suggested that men ought to text an ascii penis to their partners when they “shit-test” them (i.e. gives him a hard time to see how he will react). This leaves one with many questions: for instance, why would you date a woman who randomly gives you a hard time to see how you’ll react, and why wouldn’t any woman immediately dump a man who sent her an ascii penis, unless she had a fetish for middle-school boys?

Ion
Ion
13 years ago

Note to readers: I am not interested in seeing your boner, in ascii or in any other format.

http://superdickery.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=category&layout=blog&id=32&Itemid=50&limitstart=2

heh heh. boner.

Pecunium
13 years ago

ozymandias: The thing, of course, is that, “shit testing” is self-perceived. If a woman asks you to stop by the store and grab tampons… that could be a shit test.

The intent isn’t provable, just inferred.

speedlines
speedlines
13 years ago

I am 99% sure that MRAO is a meta-troll who is mocking MRAL.

Short of an IP check, there’s no way to tell, honestly. Poe’s Law applies to everything on the internet these days.

Occam’s Razor says same person, different email.

Avicenna
13 years ago

Why is picking up tampons a shit test? I find it an affront to think that the mere act of picking up tampons could ever erode the towering phallic edifice that is my masculinity…

How lame must you be to think that picking up tampons from the store is some sort of bizzare way to abuse men?

Xecky Gilchrist
Xecky Gilchrist
13 years ago

I am not interested in seeing your boner, in ascii or in any other format.

Plus, penises are better encoded not in ASCII but in EBCDIC…k.

Men's Rights Activist Cabana Boy
Men's Rights Activist Cabana Boy
13 years ago

Yeah! You feminists had better back off or you’ll be sorry! We omegas are sick to death of you taking our red staplers! You better give them back, or we’ll set the building on fire! Futrelle!!!111!!!

Francois Tremblay
13 years ago

Your typical MRA’s ASCII boner:

8=D

That’s right, I went there. I am implying that MRAs have small dicks. Oh snap!

But it’s okay, because they have the gigantic egos to compensate.

Bee
Bee
13 years ago

I feel like the proper place to find more information about i want to hug your sperm is engrish.com. Google dropped the ball on that one.

To the person wanting to know do women like it if guys get boners:

Depends on the woman, depends on the guy, depends on the moment. In general, this woman finds it to be a normal, healthy reaction for cis-men and some transwomen, and “likes” it about as much as she “likes” it if guys urinate. Which is to say: Congratulations! You’re alive and functioning! For more of a specific, individualized response, you may want to try asking the lady in question. If that line of questioning feels inappropriate (she’s your grandma, you’re in a company meeting, etc.), perhaps you’re better off not knowing her reaction to your erection.

I don’t even want to think about rapist unicorns, though I’m sure the False Rape Society is working up a lather about these wrongly accused beasts, and perhaps writing an indignant blog post about their accusers. Oh, the humanity!

ozymandias
ozymandias
13 years ago

Pecunium: Clearly women never have wishes or desires contrary to men’s; they’re just trying to fuck with you.

Avi: I dunno. A lot of guys, especially teenager/early twenties guys, have a hatred and fear of tampons that approaches a phobia. This can occasionally be taken advantage of, as in loudly talking about tampons when you and a female friend are tired of the guys talking about Call of Duty.

Bee: I approve of male erections, particularly if they are caused by me onto a guy I like, but also in general because more sexual pleasure is a good thing. Just don’t be a douche about it, guys.

Johnny Pez
13 years ago

Oh, the humanity!

ITYM “Oh, the unicornity!”

Captain Bathrobe
13 years ago

I, for one, welcome our Men’s Rights Activist Overlords.

Wait a minute…no I don’t.

Simone Lovelace
Simone Lovelace
13 years ago

Someone smarter than I am needs to make a version of this with MRA-themed lyrics.

It already has greek letters and overlords. Our work is half done!!

katz
13 years ago

ozy: I had a custodial summer job at my high school, and the guys on that job were absolutely repulsed by the little feminine-item trash bags. Cleaning out urinals, gum off the bottoms of chairs, locker room nast–all fine. But girl products they wouldn’t touch with a ten-foot pole.

Amnesia
Amnesia
13 years ago

But haven’t you heard? Touching anything remotely related to a woman’s menstrual cycle is the leading cause of Shriveled Dick Syndrome!

Laughing gull
Laughing gull
13 years ago

I have wondered what caused that… SDS. Now I know. Thanks, Amnesia.