One of the many happy benefits of moving this blog to WordPress is that I can now see in gory detail the search terms people use to get here. The most common search terms are, naturally enough, “manboobz” and “man boobz.” It’s on the third-most-popular search term that things start to get weird: it’s “Australopithecus.” Why? Well, because once upon a time I posted a picture of an Australopithecus couple going about their Australopithecus business.
Let’s take a quick tour through the rest of the search terms list. I think we can learn a few things, both about this blog and about the dreams and desires of people whiling away a boring afternoon at work by poking around the internet. Here are some preliminary conclusions I have drawn from the data:
1) The teeming millions want to look at dudes with lots of muscles:
world’s most muscliest man
most big muscle in the world
world’s muscular man
disgustingly big muscles
les muscle man end the world
And no, I have no idea what that last one means either.
Clearly, the prevalence of muscle-man related search terms is the side effect of having that little picture of a muscly man at the top of the sidebar in the blogger version of this blog. I feel bad that this was all I had to offer the searchers, so as you can see I’ve added a pic of a man with some, yes, ”disgustingly big muscles.”
2) Human sexuality is a weird, wonderful, and often horrifying thing. Sometimes, it involves advanced computer and/or robotic technology:
future lady robot
create a virtual woman with boobs
will cherry 2000 ever happen?
computer mouse in vagina
Other times, animals:
panda furry porn
animal dildo porn
fish meat and women porn movies
I am trying to get that last image out of my head.
3) If you regularly mention sperm on your blog, you’re going to attract a few weirdos:
how to steal sperm
do lizards like human cum
I just Googled that last one and this post of mine was the FIRST RESULT! I would therefore like to publicly state that I DO NOT KNOW THE ANSWER TO THAT QUESTION and have never even tried to find out the answer to that question. And if you by chance actually do know the answer to that question DO NOT TELL IT TO ME.
4) Angry dudes trying to find men’s rights sites can be careless typists:
why do you always here fiminist indoctorin at school but nothing about mens right activist?
women are like chilfren
A few final thoughts:
Many of the questions listed above are questions that are frankly best left unanswered. But there are some others I would dearly love to see answers to:
what do intellegent agressive beefcake nerds want
what does germaine greer think of buck angel
And one question I can answer pretty definitively:
can socially awkward men find love
Yes. The answer to that one is yes.