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Raise High the Toilet Seat, MGTOWers!

This is what happens when you leave the lid up!

I’ve never understood the whole “toilet-seat, up or down, debate.”  Let me put that more precisely: I’ve never understood why people talk about it as if it were some kind of real live issue in our society. Are there really men and women who argue over this? I don’t think I’ve ever even had a conversation about proper toilet seat etiquette, much less gotten into an argument over it. (Or perhaps I have, but have simply forgotten it because it‘s so fucking  boring.) Over the course of my life, I’ve probably spent less time thinking consciously about the issue than I’ve spent writing this paragraph.

That’s clearly not the case with our good friend MarkyMark, a somewhat excitable MGTOWer who (wholly unintentionally) provides this blog with choice material on a semi-regular basis. He must get into arguments about toilet seats all the time, judging from the long screed he posted yesterday on the topic of “what the toilet seat says about women.” Apparently, the fact that some women complain about men leaving the seat up – I’ll have to take his word on this, as I don’t think I’ve ever encountered  it in my life – is evidence that women are foul, selfish creatures indeed. As he puts it, laying forth his basic thesis:

The toilet seat is living proof that women will complain about anything and everything.  The toilet seat shows us that women cannot and will not accept responsibility for themselves.  The toilet seat shows us that women have no perspective about anything.  The toilet seat is living proof of the eternal solipsism of the female mind.  The toilet seat provides empirical evidence that, no matter what or how much they get, women will never be happy.  Finally, the toilet seat shows us that women are spoiled, entitled brats. …

The toilet seat shows us what women are REALLY like, and it ain’t sugar and spice and everything nice.

So distressed is poor Marky at the thought of women demanding that the seat be lowered that he’s driven to reconsider the very idea of universal suffrage:

You know what’s sobering?  We gave these creatures the right to vote!  Yes, that’s right; we gave these childish, immature, spoiled brats the right to decide who has power over us, to decide OUR futures.  With the way women handle the toilet seat issue and what it says about them, is it any wonder why they were denied the vote?!

If this were someone other than MarkyMark, I would probably consider this a joke, or satire, or some sort of reductio ad absurdum. But as far as I have been able to determine, MarkyMark does not in fact have a sense of humor; this is a guy, after all, who once wrote a point-by-point “rebuttal” of an article in The Onion.

Presumably at some point in the future Marky will take on the other pressing bathroom-related issue that bedevils the men of the world:

Why do women always go to the bathroom together? Are they lesbians? Are they plotting something? Or … both?

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Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
Men's Rights Activist Lieutenant
13 years ago

You can even see some of the femcunts talking about how it’s their God-given right as women to DICTATE how men get to leave the seat.

law1204
law1204
13 years ago

If a toilet has a seat, what is the point of leaving it up all the time? It may as well not have a seat at all if that’s your attitude.

mediumdave
mediumdave
13 years ago

Let’s see… it was “bitch” then “whore” then “femcunt”. MRAL (or should I call him Ferdinand Bardamu) is about due for banning, I’d say.

briget
briget
13 years ago

FWIW, there is a product which I highly recommend which allows a woman to pee standing up
http://www.go-girl.com/
I’ve had mine for close to a year now and I LOVE it

ScareCrow P-man
13 years ago

Tell me Dave – why did you delete my previous comment this time?

Captain Bathrobe
13 years ago

Hey, MRAL, I’ve got a great solution to the whole toilet seat issue: live by yourself. That way, you can leave the seat any way you damn well please.

If you want to be in a long-term relationship, however, then issues like these have to be resolved through negotiation and compromise–which sometimes means letting the other person have their way. It’s what grown-ups do.

Kave
Kave
13 years ago

There is a reason why the men who designed the toilet seat (mra’s would assume it was a man) gave the toilet a lid that both men and women have to open and close.

Use it. No one wants to look at toilet water when they look into your bathroom. It’s there for a reason and it’s egalitarian.

As a side note there are many places you can travel in the world that for various reasons do not have any toilet seats in public bathrooms. Reasons vary; In the French Riviera for instance establishments can be closed down because of drug use and toilet seats sat in backwards or not make for handy cocaine or other drug usage in small bathrooms. Sometimes they are stolen, etc.

The first time my wife and I were in Spain together she groaned about the lack of toilet seats (never-mind toilet paper), the last time we were there she commented first about how there were toilet seats everywhere, but was bemused by what she found going in after the older spanish ladies. They seemed to be still squatting over the hole in woman’s washrooms. Toilet seats over the age of 50 or so were all in the up positions.

I do wonder what MRA’s would feel like going into a traditional muslim/east indian toilet and how that would oppress them to have to squat.

As a side note if you have small children I get the falling in thing, (which takes in 99% of mom’s telling dads to stop leaving it up). Mra’s naturally just really don’t take in small persons issues ever.

I do not get it as a grown person who should be looking where they are sitting, much like we look before were putting one foot in front of the other that it’s not a pothole. Yes it’s polite to put the lid down. People should be polite.

I have just spent more time talking about toilet seats then 99.9 percent of women do in their lifetime (unless they have toddlers or stupid pets I guess).

I hereby sentence Markymark to have to take his morning ritual in rural Portugal, that newspaper will have more uses then you wish.

johnnykaje
13 years ago

“Hey, MRAL, I’ve got a great solution to the whole toilet seat issue: live by yourself. That way, you can leave the seat any way you damn well please.”

But he’ll still have to contend with the imaginary women in sitcoms, stand up, shitty greeting cards, etc. Which, he has demonstrated, he cannot differentiate from actual individual women.

Kave
Kave
13 years ago

Another trivia about toilet usage.

In many European countries it is a sign of class (ALPHA’S) that men urinate sitting down, perhaps deprived from the Moslem squat, but it is true. That being true you’d think those men would appreciate the toilet seat being in the down position.

I have way too much toilet trivia. I completely blame my wife, she started making mental notes after asking why women went into stalls together in certain locations and the protocol behind this. MRAL… no they are not doing what you wish/think they are.

katz
13 years ago

I think MRAL could prove himself to be a reasonable human being by answering one of the following two questions:

1. What is an example of a situation that you would consider to be unjust to women (or a woman) and not to men (or a man)?

2. What is an example of a situation where you would consider a man to be acting in an entitled or unreasonable manner?

If, as I rather think, he is unable to produce an example of either one, then that proves that he’s just a whiner who would always think he was being oppressed even if he was surrounded by a harem of BMI-20 slaves giving him BJs while feeding him grapes and fanning him with a palm frond.

chocomintlipwax
13 years ago

I think I pretty well explained why a person might not be looking where they’re sitting. If you’re the primary user of said toilet or if you have microseconds before imminent explosion, you might not look. Generally, if it’s the middle of the night–whether emergency or not–I don’t turn on the light. Why should I? Just makes it more difficult to go back to sleep.

And really, a toilet is not a footpath. If you’re using the toilet several times a day every day, potholes, dead armadillos, or dog poo should not be cropping up around your toilet. You don’t need to watch where you’re going, so to speak. This comparison is pretty ridiculous–more so than the one I often see comparing putting on makeup in public to taking a shit in public.

Finally, and what I really wanted to say, this femicunt will happily dictate what others do in MY bathroom. If you want to leave the seat up, do it in your own bathroom. My toilet, my rules.

(Also, urgh, squatters. If there were 20 squatters and one “normal” toilet I would wait for the “normal” toilet, unless it was an emergency. Ironically, in an emergency the last thing you want to do is use a squatter … and now y’all know more about my bathroom habits than anyone but my gastro should.)

chocomintlipwax
13 years ago

Really, moderation because I used the “fc” word?

Also, I guess there’s more to the tags than I thought. That shouldn’t be a blockquote, and the quote I had got eaten. 🙁

Johnny Pez
13 years ago

Boy, Fidel Castro must be feeling pretty embarrassed right about now. Here he went to all the trouble of organizing an underground revolutionary army and overthrowing the Cuban government. If only he had met MRAL instead of Che Guevara, he could have learned how to carry out the Cuban Revolution by insulting random people on the internet.

mediumdave
mediumdave
13 years ago

OK MRAL (if you’re still reading), it’s because of nonsense like this that the MRM is also known as the Abusers’ Lobby. A man like MarkyMark, who’s so full of rage that he reacts to a request to put a toilet seat down… no, scratch that… the mere thought of being asked to put a toilet seat down (something so innocuous that takes half a second to do)… is the same kind of man who’d slap his wife or girlfriend around for serving his dinner cold, or beat his son with a belt for any little thing. Men like this cannot be trusted around women or children until they learn some anger management.

The true goal of the MRM is to remove the scant protections that the families of abusers have, and leave women and children trapped with men like MarkyMark. Imagine having him for a father! I’d never be able to sleep, for fear of what he’d do.

Which is exactly why the MRM/MGTOW “movement” cannot be allowed to succeed, because if it’s members get their way, the end result will be more domestic violence and more children growing up traumatized.

(Sorry to interrupt the merriment, folks, but this is what we’re looking at.)

Avicenna
13 years ago

Quick question…

Why is this even an issue? This is so bizzarely daft. Look women need the toilet seat and we can pee standing up. It’s a pretty good deal. And I have never heard of anyone outside a sitcom complain about this.

Must be all those insane women MRAL dates….

Amnesia
Amnesia
13 years ago

@Avicenna

I didn’t think blow-up dolls cared whether the toilet seat was up or down.

cynickal
cynickal
13 years ago

@Avicenna

That explains why women always go to the bathroom before something awful happens to me… Must be their wicked lesbian plots.

I thought that was where women plan who is an “omega”, a “beta”, an “alpha”, an “alpha-alpha”, or a “mangina-alpha-alpha”

Avicenna
13 years ago

Thus making the club an Alphabeta soup? (sorry cannot resist bad puns. I grew up on a steady diet of James Bond)

I don’t know what those classifications mean. I don’t even understand the logic behind them since humans don’t quite work like that.

Johnny Pez
13 years ago

I don’t even understand the logic behind them since humans don’t quite work like that.

No logic involved, just misogyny plus paranoia plus sexual frustration.

cynickal
cynickal
13 years ago

Women in MRAL’s world fail the Bechdel Test

Personally, I leave the lid and seat down. Because I don’t want plants growing in my toilet.

Which I did start doing because a woman complained. Since she fell in at 3 am, I conceded she may have a point. (I have disgraced the penis) 🙁

tawaen
tawaen
13 years ago

…There are people who don’t put the seat down and shut the lid before flushing?

Humans are disgusting. Ugh. Why not just quit using toilet paper and stop washing your hands while you’re at it?

Though I guess it makes sense that MRAs are all for the spread of fecal bacteria. Who knew they were so literal in their practices?

ScareCrow P-Man
13 years ago

Futrelle: “I didn’t”

I don’t believe you Dave.