Categories
marriage strike men who should not ever be with women ever MGTOW misogyny oppressed men sex Uncategorized

>The Price of Love

>

Apparently, it’s only 15p!
With Valentine’s day fast approaching, I thought I’d point you all to an interesting little set of online apps, courtesy of the fellows at NoMarriage.com: calculators that purport to tell dudes the true cost of sex — with wives, girlfriends, and what the kids today are calling “randoms.” 
The assumptions behind each of these calculators are pretty revealing: they essentially assume that guys generally resent the women they’re involved with, and only spend time with them because it’s necessary to pretend to be interested in them in order to get sex. The calculators also assume that guys are more or less paying for everything.
 
I ran a few numbers, and the results are telling: for the guys for whom these calculators are basically designed — that is, guys who generally dislike spending non-sexy time with women, and who believe that “every kiss begins with Kay” — the cost can easily be hundreds of dollars for each and every time they and their special ladies manage to set aside their resentments long enough to engage in a grudging bout  of the old in-and-out.

By contrast, for guys going out with independent (and perhaps even feminist) women they actually like and enjoy spending time with, who pay their own way, and who live nearby, the putative cost of sex can literally be pennies a pop. For married men who actually like their working wives, the cost of sex can actually be negative, because it’s cheaper to cohabit than to live alone.

In a nutshell: misogyny costs you, big time. But actually liking women? That makes sense — dollars and sense!

For dedicated Men Going Their Own Way, the calculators, with a little tweaking, can also be used to calculate the cost of NOT having sex. Using the girlfriend calculator, replace “How many hours do you spend having stupid conversations with your GF (per week)” with “How many hours do you spend having stupid conversations with other MGTOW (per week).” Ignore the rest of the questions until you get to the one about your hourly wage. Then, for the question asking how many times you have sex per week, ignore this wording and simply input “1.” Voila! You have calculated the (opportunity) cost per week of not having sex!

So, dear readers, what is YOUR cost of sex?
— 
If you enjoyed this post, would you kindly* use the “Share This” or one of the other buttons below to share it on Twitter, Facebook, Reddit, or wherever else you want. I appreciate it. 
*Yes, that was a Bioshock reference.
Subscribe
Notify of
guest

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

147 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
girlscientist
9 years ago

>They left out the cost of birth control.Oh, riiiiiight, not their problem. How foolish of me.

Elizabeth
9 years ago

>According to them, zero since I am a girl and girls are never expected to pay for anything.

Lady Victoria von Syrus

>I actually tried to fill this out regarding the relationship I have with my boyfriend, but I got stopped at the first question, "Hours in stupid conversation per week." I kind of *like* the stupid and silly conversations we get into (If the Watchmen graphic novel were a tabletop RPG, who is playing each character?).Apparently, these dudes feel that sex should happen whenever they want, with minimal effort and no concern to anyone else who might be in the room. There's also no quantifier for quality – I'd rather have really good sex once a week than tepid sex every day.

Joe
Joe
9 years ago

>Hold up. Is that Courtney Love on the cover of that book?Because that bitch is expensive.

Ozymandias
9 years ago

>I cost thirty bucks per fuck, apparently. I'm cheaper than a whore.

Hide and Seek
9 years ago

>$20/month. I consistently try to bring the cost lower than the cost of condoms, which roughly *giggle* equates to having sex at least 20 times a month. Sometimes I cannot convince my partner of the supreme logic of this plan, that makes the cost per occasion rise slightly. I'm thinking about switching to a form of birth control which costs $40/ 5 years. Which will make the cost per occasion plummet.

Valerie
9 years ago

>Their hand is free, lets hope they use that.

Sal Bro
9 years ago

>$200/mo if you use the girlfriend calculator; $170/mo if you use the wife calculator. The main expense is mostly due to our schedules, which only allow us to hang out together 1 day/week and so we spend the ENTIRE day together. But I also don't like big-ticket items (jewelry, perfume, shoes, games); both of us buy our clothes second-hand; and we don't take vacations together, so that helps cut down costs.What the calculator doesn't take into account is splitting costs of living. So I end up actually saving him money, even considering the cost of his time. I notice the wife calculator doesn't take into account tax breaks and lower insurance rates that often come with being married. Those can amount to quite a bit.

nobody
9 years ago

>$200/hr. Call me, sweetheart.

Kollege_Messerschmitt
9 years ago

>It's seriously telling that they don't seem to be aware of the fact that most women LIKE having sex. No need to pay for it in any way or form!That they have to pay their girlfriends/wives tells us more about them than they want, I think.In a way, I find it really sad that they see relationships as having to endure their partner (watching shows with them they don't like, talking about things they don't care about, etc.) and paying for them so, in exchange, they may have a warm hole every now and then. It's no wonder they are so frustrated. If two partners in a relationship resent each other and have to actually calculate the cost-benefit ratio then HOLY SHIT THERE IS SOMETHING REALLY REALLY WRONG!

Raoul
9 years ago

>Cheeze-a-pete. What is the cost-benefit analysis of your child? Your dog? Your cat? Your best friend?The corporatist mind set is really takin' the f%ck over.

AbsintheDexterous
9 years ago

>I know that it's a tired and cliche thing to say, but if a guy is calculating the "cost" of his girlfriend, perhaps he should just invest in a Real Doll instead. In the long run, it would be cheaper and be what he professes to want.That, or shell out some money for therapy. Either way, it should help.

theclementine
9 years ago

>My boyfriend and I sat down together and did the math. Because we're students at an out of state university, he makes -$25 an hour (because of tuition). Hence, not factoring in time, the cost of having sex with me is about $2. When factoring in time, the cost of having sex with me is -$3. Apparently he makes money by having sex with me?

keiko44
9 years ago

>Are we honestly (in the comments here) humoring the idea that it costs men money to date (fuck) women? Are some of you women here running the calculation just to see how cheap you are, like it's a testament to your low-maintenance? Okay then, let's talk about my fucking expenses to date men. Dumb clothes I only wear on dates, makeup (since I'm never perfect, apparently) the time and effort it takes to be acceptably thin, plastic surgery for a lot of women, birth control for women is WAY more expensive than condoms…I mean seriously. In the end if you're thinking about relationships in terms of cost then you really shouldn't be in one. Like someone said above, get a real doll instead.

thevagrantsvoice
9 years ago

>Are we honestly (in the comments here) humoring the idea that it costs men money to date(fuck) women? PROTIP: They're being sarcastic.

theclementine
9 years ago

>@ Keiko44 – I'm just entertained that the calculator allows negative numbers.

Sandy
9 years ago

>Keiko, I ran it to see how much my husband is costing me. I'm the highearner.He is an economical choice! Also he doesn't waste any of my time.

c765d7be-3660-11e0-b341-000bcdcb8a73

>Lordy, Can we just say "Dudes, Thats not what relationships are like, If you are spending time with a person doing these things you are not having a relationship. There now, isnt that better? go have a real relationship,WITH SOMEONE YOU LIKE!"

c765d7be-3660-11e0-b341-000bcdcb8a73

>um sorry about that screen name, side effect of logging in?

chocomintlipwax
9 years ago

>I like to think of it in terms of how much time and money I save by NOT having sex with anyone. No time spent shaving areas that don't need shaving, no time spent cleaning up when I otherwise wouldn't need to clean up, no time or money spent on STD tests, pregnancy tests, EC, or abortions … ahhhhh. Life is good. Of course, the same sorts of guys who view women as emotional harpies who are only good for a fuck and nothing more are the same sorts who call me a selfish bitch for not putting myself on the meat market. It's pretty confusing.

shaenon
9 years ago

>"The corporatist mind set is really takin' the f%ck over."That's something that's struck me about a lot of the stuff on this blog, both in David's posts and in the comments from MRA/MGTOW guys: this insistence on seeing human relationships as financial transactions. They seem to think that the way to get a rewarding relationship is to give as little as possible while taking as much as you can in return. Because that means you got a bargain!Like these sex calculators. If you have a real relationship with a person you don't hate, these questions don't even make sense. I tried filling out the wife one to see how much my husband was costing me, but it's hopeless.How many hours do you spend having pointless conversations with your wife per week: This is a negative? That's one of the great pleasures of love or friendship or family, the pointess conversations.How many hours do you spend doing other things with your wife you would rather not do: Do they mean things my husband wants to do and I don't? In which case, of course I sometimes do things I'd rather not do for his sake, just as he does for me. Or do the mean things neither one of us wants to do, and I'm supposed to blame it on my husband that we have to spend a Saturday afternoon getting our taxes done when I'd rather be eating ice cream?How much would you spend on housing if you were single (per month – make your best guess): Um, I'd be paying twice as much, because my husband wouldn't be there to pay his half of the mortgage. Or am I supposed to guess how much I'd be spending in a fantasy world where I didn't make any of the choices that led to this marriage, this house, this life? In that case, my best guess is that Warren Buffett would decide to spend his fortune buying me a private island and paying me a million dollars a month to live in it. So, negative a million dollars.I think I've figured out how this game works!How much do you spend on your wife (besides housing) per month: On groceries? Comic books? The gas bill? Diamond rings? Cat food? What is this question? Does the guy who wrote these questions understand that married couples typically live together?Big ticket items (not included above), such as a car, vacations, etc you buy your wife – per year: Okay, if you are in a marriage where you regularly buy your wife cars you're not allowed to drive and vacations on which you are not invited, I suggest you get out of that relationship. Also, who buys a new car on a yearly basis? I will punch you if I find you.How many times do you have sex with your wife per year: I just like to picture them counting.

kysokisaen
9 years ago

>I was a little surprised to find the gap between my base cost (around $15) and my "real cost" ($54). The low base cost made sense, what with all that feminist check-splitting and the rarity of luxury dining opportunities in my area, but the real cost only assumed like 10 or 15 hours of interaction a week. Where is this $4/hr value on his leisure time coming from, and why isn't it canceled out by the value of mine?

avpd0nmmng
9 years ago

>It proves that the only type of sex these guys can have is with a prostitute.

Joe
Joe
9 years ago

>> That's something that's struck me about a lot of the stuff on this blog, both in David's posts and in the comments from MRA/MGTOW guys: this insistence on seeing human relationships as financial transactions.This.

Cold
9 years ago

>By contrast, for guys going out with independent (and perhaps even feminist) women they actually like and enjoy spending time with, who pay their own way, and who live nearby, the putative cost of sex can literally be pennies a pop.Women who pay their own way? I asked all my friends who work in restaurants and movie theaters how many times, in the course of a shift, they see women on dates paying their own way instead of the guy footing the entire bill. Their answers ranged from zero to two. TWO, on an entire shift!!!I'm presently dating one of those rare women who pays her own way, but she was raised in Indonesia by a single father. In fact, the one thing that all the good women I have dated have in common is good fathers in their lives.

Cold
9 years ago

>That's something that's struck me about a lot of the stuff on this blog, both in David's posts and in the comments from MRA/MGTOW guys: this insistence on seeing human relationships as financial transactions.Sticking your head in the sand and pretending that the financial aspect of relationships doesn't exist won't make it go away.

percyprune
9 years ago

>"Sticking your head in the sand and pretending that the financial aspect of relationships doesn't exist won't make it go away."If the money really matters to you more than the relationship, then you probably shouldn't be in a relationship.As the kids say these days: 'Ur doing it wrong.'

booboonation
9 years ago

>"financial aspect" is completely different than what was quoted in cold's comment. Then he said, "financial aspect". There is a "financial aspect" of going to the toilet. TYPICAL MRA DISHONESTY in argumentation. I'll give an example, even though I've already won this one. Substitute parent/child. 'They talk of their parenting as if it were a financial transaction.'And then someone says, well, you can't ignore the financial aspect of parenting. RIGHT. It's hard for me not to hurl insults when people argue like this. MRAs in particular seem to show a huge hostility to arguing points that were actually MADE, dealing with feminism that actually exists, etc. My man would give me every penny he had if I asked him because he's happy. If you don't like women, stay away from them.

Hide and Seek
9 years ago

>Cold: When I go out with my friend we don't always split the check. Sometimes I pay and sometimes he pays depending on our overall financial and emotional situations. The dollar amount is not even, we do not calculate how much we spend on each other down the the penny or even to the meal. But it *feels* fair and there is a built in mechanism to avoid resentment: If I feel like I have been paying for too many meals, I ask for the check to be split. If I feel like I have been getting too many things free, I take out my money. If we are also sharing an activity, I say Thanks for dinner, I'll pay for the movie or go-carts or whatever. And he does the same thing. What he doesn't do is keep mechanically paying for things until he slowly grows to hate me, because we all have to take care of our own shit and manage our own feelings.

Hide and Seek
9 years ago

>Did you post that to the right thread?

Cold
9 years ago

>Hide and Seek:I also asked my friends how often they see the woman pay for the entire date cost of the meal or for both tickets, and every single one of them answered that they had either never seen it happen, or it happened maybe once in a month.

Hide and Seek
9 years ago

>Good to know.My point was not that other people make the same choices my friend and I do, it doesn't really matter to our relationship whether they do or not. My point was there is another way to structure relationships, one which recognizes and takes into accounts the things that bother us, such as men feeling like ATMs. There is a cultural script about how relationships are supposed to work and it's almost completely bullshit, but the good things is, *no one is actually enforcing it.* We get to do whatever we want and arrange our interactions however we agree to. Isn't that nice?

Cold
9 years ago

>Yeah, no police are actually enforcing the idea that men pay for dates, but when a man starts insisting that dates be dutch as I started doing a few years ago, the quantity of dates they get sinks like AIG stock. The quality of the few women who were willing to pay their own way on dates was well above average, but the fact remains that most women believe they are entitled to have their way paid and I see no indication that feminists are less likely to believe this.

Marissa
9 years ago

>Actually, I'm not ashamed to admit that my boyfriend pays for all our dates. Because the allowance he gets from his parents is greater than what I make at my shitty job; and most of what I make goes to my bills and interest payments on the loans that I took out to pay for my education. Loans which he never had to consider taking because his parents pay for his schooling. So, yeah, my boyfriend pays for our dates. In fact, he offers to pay for as much as possible. And it's entirely fair that way.

Marissa
9 years ago

>My sister is in a similar situation. Her boyfriend's father started a company so that he could have the job he always dreamed of having; while she's in school with a lousy job to pay for student loans. I bring this up because the fact that there is a wage gap between what men earn and what women earn determines who has more disposable income. That is, income that can be disposed of on things like dates.

Cold
9 years ago

>Thanks for illustrating how feminist justify being leeches in their relationships. Now, for bonus points, let's hear you name one employer that pays men more than women for doing the same job at the same proficiency with the same hours and seriority.

Marissa
9 years ago

>That's interesting, that working for my money makes me a "leech". Tell me more.

Cold
9 years ago

>Wow, what fine reading comprehension you have, completely missing the words "in their relationships" that follow the word "leeches". Obviously I wasn't saying anything about how you derive your own income.

Marissa
9 years ago

>Dates are only one part of a relationship.

thevagrantsvoice
9 years ago

>So what do you provide to your boyfriend that makes up for him paying on dates?Genuinely not trolling, I'm just wondering what sort of answer you'd give.

Cold
9 years ago

>LOL, in your own words:So, yeah, my boyfriend pays for our dates. In fact, he offers to pay for as much as possible. And it's entirely fair that way.So, assuming that your story is true, you already admitted that he pays for more than just dates, thus making your point moot. You also consider this to be "entirely fair" because he is a fortunate son with generous parents and no debt while you racked up a bunch getting what was apparently a very poor education which didn't get you any further than a "shitty job" in a call center.How many call centers expect their employees to have degrees? It would seem that you failed to obtain employment in your field and believe that you are entitled to have a fortunate son financially compensate you for your personal failures, and that this is why you feel that you shouldn't have to pay your own way. You aren't the first feminist to tell such a story in an effort to justify being a leech in a relationship, and I'm sure you won't be the last.

David Futrelle
9 years ago

>Cold, I was once in a long-distance relationship with a woman who earned more than me. She paid for most of our dates, she paid half of the airline tickets when I went to see her, while I paid none of her cost when she came to see me. Given that she earned more than me, and could afford it, I think this arrangement made perfect sense.Are you now going to get outraged and say that this is how men justify being leeches in their relationships?Of course, in almost all the relationships I've been in, and on almost all of the dates I've been on, we've both paid for stuff equally.

Cold
9 years ago

>Incidentally, I took that calculator for a spin and apparently each time I have sex costs me $18.50. I'd say that's some pretty good bang for my buck, pun intended, but then again I'm skewing the results by maliciously exploiting my girlfriend. See, even though I make about twice as much per hour as she does(for working a completely different job) I allow her to pay her way on dates. How horrifically unfair of me.

Erl Daschund
9 years ago

>Now, for bonus points, let's hear you name one employer that pays men more than women for doing the same job at the same proficiency with the same hours and seriority.Goodyear. That's what the Lilly Ledbetter case, and subsequently law, were about. Now, the law has been changed to count each unfairly lower paycheck as an instance of discrimination, so that the statute of limitations isn't onerous. But yes, Goodyear spent 30 years underpaying Lilly Ledbetter due to her sex.

Joe
Joe
9 years ago

>> See, even though I make about twice as much per hour as she does(for working a completely different job) I allow her to pay her way on dates. How horrifically unfair of me.Did anyone say that was unfair? If that's what you two want to do, then more power to you.See this comment upthread:> We get to do whatever we want and arrange our interactions however we agree to. Isn't that nice?

Cold
9 years ago

>Most dates isn't the same as all dates; you're saying you still paid something but that it wasn't 50/50. The more pertinent questions are would you have broken things off with her if she had insisted that you pay half, and would she have had a hard time finding any other man who would tolerate her only paying for her own half of relationship costs.

Cold
9 years ago

>Goodyear. That's what the Lilly Ledbetter case, and subsequently law, were about. Now, the law has been changed to count each unfairly lower paycheck as an instance of discrimination, so that the statute of limitations isn't onerous. But yes, Goodyear spent 30 years underpaying Lilly Ledbetter due to her sex.LOL, according to the case details:Ledbetter was paid $3,727 per month; the lowest paid male area manager received $4,286 per month, the highest paid, $5,236.Let's see, that means she was paid $559 less than the lowest-paid male manager, and that he was paid a whopping $950 less than the highest-paid male manager. So, woman paid $559 less than man = victim, but man paid $950 less than other man = yawn. Never mind that managers often have their salary adjusted based on performance and that she may have simply been the worst-performing manager, or that $3,727 per month is a decent income even in today's dollars.

dorksfordean
9 years ago

>The lowest paid male manager was worst then she was per performance reviews.

thevagrantsvoice
9 years ago

>Is it just me or do comments keep disappearing here? A minute ago it said this entry had 49, now it has 48. Or am I seeing things?

David Futrelle
9 years ago

>I deleted two comments from Cold that were gratuitous personal attacks.

1 2 3