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Women: They can’t even walk properly |
Have you ever sat down to write up a little list of pros and cons, only to find that you can’t think of any pros at all? That was the dilemma faced by a number of regulars on the grotesquely misnamed NiceGuy MGTOW [Men Going Their Own Way] forums when the subject of “what women offer” to men came up the other day. Nightstorm introduced the topic thusly:
It just seems women cannot offer a man anything these days. The days of “well.. I have a pussy”, just doesn’t seem to cut it anymore.
Don’t I know it! I can’t tell you how many conversations I’ve had with the ladies that go just like this:
INTERIOR, FANCY RESTAURANT, EVENING
DAVID:
SEXY LADY
DAVID:
SEXY LADY:
DAVID
Oh, by the way, you’re paying for dinner.
And … scene!
Nightstorm, a fair and open-minded fellow, did concede that women had some good points, a few of them anyway, and set out to write up a list of pros and cons. First, the pros. Read this carefully, ladies. These are the only good things you bring to the table:
Pros:
Pussy
Emotional support (if its a decent chick) which can ranged from listening to you, to snuggling, ect.
Sammichs
Something cute to look at while they are young
A cure for lonliness
Yes, “lonliness.” Spell-checking is for bitches and hoes.
Predictably, Nightstorm’s “Cons” list was a lot longer. Some selected highlights:
Bankrupcy. A chick will cause your wealth to go DOWN. One of my cousins knew a guy who would literally be a millionare if his wife didn’t spend.
Bitching. Yes, they nag and vex your soul to death when they do not get their little ways.
Manipulation and Control. What? You don’t want to do the dishs for me? No sex tonight!!!
…
Loud. Women have high pitched voices, who’s bright idea was it to use it all the time making screetching noises?
Trashy. Once they get what they want (marriage), then they stop working on themselves. Now they let themselves go.
Divorce. See Bankrupcy. Once you wake up to these ho’s, they have alittle secret.. their taking HALF of what you own.
Cheaters. They will go sleep with other men if things don’t work out with you, you don’t mind.. right?
Entitlement. They deserve it all because they have been born with a pussy hole.
Dangerous. You can’t be you around women. One false word and it could be jail time for you till the manginas say its enough.
Naturally, others piped up with their own observations. Not many “pros.” Lots of “cons.” Some found it hard to think of a single good thing to say about women. IHateRegistering summed up his feelings with an enigmatic one-liner, declaring women: “Reused and retreaded wares at government-mandated retail prices.” (Uh, what?) Cherishthehate, living up to his name, concluded that women were more or less entirely useless:
I have let this question ruminate for the last couple of hours while doing other stuff. Basically I came up with nothing.
Pussy? Meh. … I once thought of trying gay just to get a decent blowjob. (jk of course 🙂 ) …
Companionship? Again, I have known very few women who you could have a decent conversation with that didn’t focus on clothes, TV or their friends’ love lives. …
Women basically contribute nothing to a relationship, the onus is always on the man to keep them happy. If you ever ask a woman what she brings to the table in a relationship you will be mostly met with blank stares. It is a total non sequitur for them.
True, a couple of commenters did stand up to defend the virtues of women. Well, sort of. Seems like the ladies can be worth keeping around, so long as you keep them in check. As fschmidt put it:
I would like to remind the gentlemen here that most of the cons listed are the result of mistakes made by men, mistakes like giving women the vote. When properly managed, women are an asset.
Ah, giving women the right to vote. I always knew that was a terrible idea.
That and modern sanitation.
@kupo:
Thanks! When I was getting glasses for the first time, I spent a while trying on frames and those were the only ones I ended up thinking looked nice on me.
I actually could use a haircut again, that picture is at least a year and a half old now and I haven’t gotten a haircut between then and now.
They do. Really frame your face well.
dslucia, agreeing with the others about the glasses…also, your side-eye is what I’m giving this latest boretroll and his so not original miggy ideas.
I think there is an ‘r’ missing from his name, because this is how his ideas about sex and reproduction present.
And, in usual goddamned bloody troll style, he answered from his email and completely fucked up the page layout.
GO YOUR OWN WAY AND LEAVE US THE FUCK ALONE, CYP.
Yeah, I almost missed where he said more than once that was I wrong become I’m a “salty old hag”
Not a surprise that a troll would try this one out, but pretty funny considering that in his opening salvo, he said that any ad hominem attacks would be considered an admission of defeat. I guess he’s admitting that I’ve defeated him.
And since troll loves pop science about fertility…
https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg21929275-500-mens-sperm-quality-decreases-at-age-35/
Misandry!
WWTH, you frequently obliterate their arguments…maybe this one will create a FB page or start a thread elsewhere on you, too (And then run back here to crow about it, in typical attention-seeking fashion.)
You *really* make an impression on them.
Keep up the good work!
Points to the troll for saying this:
And then in his VERY NEXT COMMENT saying this:
And also this:
MANLOGIC: It’s for Men. ™
My takeaway from all this, is that “women are full of cum”.
Why are they all so jealous of cats?
Cats do go their own way. Constantly, and without effort or caring what anyone thinks. 😛
Even if you don’t marry a woman, you will still have to pay these essential bills. Why are you blaming women for the need to keep a roof over your head and the lights on?
So you want a conventionally attractive woman, but you don’t want her spending any money to make herself attractive. Uh huh.
So what? Lots of adults – I mean, like LOTS – have a means of income, a place to stay, and opinions about things. Men and women alike. It’s called adulthood.
WWTH wanted to know what you, specifically, bring to the table that makes you the male equivalent of a dream unicorn HB10 virgin. You need to step up your game if you want to land one of those magical stay-at-home 17 to 19 year old virgins who still manage to look like a supermodel despite never spending any money on clothes, shoes, or makeup.
Just wanted to put those two quotes together, stand back, and bask in the pleasing glow of self-own.
(Ninja’d by several people, but oh well. I get the feeling our troll has been striking out with the much younger ladies and has a bad case of the projections.)
IP
And vinegar! That’s the expression, right?
What? Another misogynistic troll is making biological claims and is utterly unable to cite their sources? It must be Thursday.
@Viscaria
Women are salt & vinegar, men are sourcream & onion.
No double dipping!
@Petal
Huh. I’d say my potato chip flavor preferences match my dating preferences, then.
@kupo
Hey, mine too! Vinegar always, sourcream once in a while. :p
Well..no more potato chips for me then. 🙁
There’s also Doritos!
True! I haven’t had Doritos in forever, which means it’s way past time to have some!
I don’t know how you guys interpret what these trolls are trying to say. There are so many typos and grammatical errors! This one was especially bad, and then he had the audacity to call you all out on the few typos you had. Whatever.
Anti troll kittehs
http://www.catloversdiary.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/pregnant_cat_care_healthy_pregnant_cat-300×200.jpg
Because women actually want cats.
Winner.
That mouse
Did we scare off the troll?
That was a lot easier than I was expecting.