Category Archives: sex

Become a total Alpha Male sex god by spitting in women’s mouths

Always practics safe saliva sex

Always practice safe saliva sex

Hey ladies! Better not read today’s post, as it’s only for ALPHA DUDES and would-be ALPHA DUDES. For while I was out looking for Man Boobz material I happened to run across some excellent and not-at-all ridiculous advice from a dude called FISTO on how ALPHA DUDES can use sex to totally control the ladies.

This advice is so totally ALPHA I feel I can only dispense it in small doses, so here are a few tips. Only after you have totally mastered these tips to totally master the ladies should you even consider reading the rest of the post I got them from.  (Also, to be serious for a moment, it’s also fucked up and possibly triggery, so you may not even want to read my post.)

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A Pickup Artist Asks the Question: “Is It Possible For Women To Be A Healthy Promiscous Woman?”

Women: It's very confusing up in there.

Women: It’s very confusing up in there.

So I’ve been reading a bit more in the Evo Psych literature — some of the alleged classics in the field that most Manospherians seem to have either read or absorbed by osmosis. I’m learning a lot about the dubious “science” underlying many of the Manosphere’s most cherished beliefs.

But I’m a little worried for my own intellectual safety, because I see so much clear evidence around me that reading too much Evo Psych can turn one’s brain to mush.

Consider the example of rmaxgenactivepua, the Evo-Psych-addled gentleman who writes the blog “Rejecting Modern Women: Pickup & Advanced NLP & Charisma Behaviourial Conversational Strategic Technologies.” Specifically, consider the recent post of his that asks the grammatically confusing question: “Is It Possible For Women To Be A Healthy Promiscous [sic] Woman?”

I’m just going to quote the whole damn thing because, yikes:

To definitively answer that question, is a woman biologically designed or hardwired to be promiscous

Are there any biological co-factors which support a womans ability to be promiscous?

A womans vagina is a massive breeding grounding for std’s, making it highly unsuitable & dangerous for sleeping with multiple men

Women have a highly short period of fertility. only 10 years of fertility, less if theyre in bad shape

Women have a limited amount of eggs

Plus women dont have the emotional blocking abilities of men

The real kicker is, women are only capable of having one mans child at a time

If women were meant to be polygamous, they’d be able to carry multiple children of multiple men

Making it ludicrous to assume women are polygamous, it’s laughably ridiculous to assume women are polygamous when theyre own biology isnt even capable of reproducing polygamously

Men on the other hand are designed from the ground up to impregnate millions of women, they reproduce over millions of sperm a day, & can impregnate 100′s of women

In fact one man, men are so efficient at reproducing with hundreds of women, one man could repopulate an entire civilisation if he wanted to, thanks to his production of millions of sperm

One woman on the other hand, couldnt populate her own ass, let alone a shoe box or a cat litter tray …

Proving a woman isnt anywhere near designed to be a slut, FACT

Well, yeah, I guess if you make up a rule that states women can’t have sex for pleasure with multiple partners unless they’re biologically capable of giving birth simultaneously to children sired by all these different partners, then women aren’t designed to be “sluts.”

Then again if you can simply make up your own rules like this, you can prove pretty much anything. If I decide that men can’t be polygamous unless they are simultaneously holding their breath underwater and on fire, I guess I’ve proved that men can’t be sluts either.

FACT!

Oh, and while it’s true that a cis man with healthy sperm could (in theory) repopulate an entire civilization, there are some women who are giving men a run for their money in this department.

19-kids-and-counting

Red Piller: Evil sluts not only want to have sex but actually want people not to hate them for it.

Men can also be sexy hamsters.

Men: Can also engage in hamstering

So the Red Pill subreddit, as you may recall, is a place for dudes to discuss the devious and possibly not altogether ethical or even consensual strategies they’ve come up with to … have sex with anyone they want. But their real goal is not just to have sex, but to control other people’s opinions and thoughts of them doing so. They want to silence all critics, and then even demand praise for their morally reprehensible or at least morally questionable actions.

Woah. It feels like my brain was just taken over for a second. Did I even write that? I don’t think I did. I swear I’ve read most of that paragraph before.

Oh wait.

NakedAndBehindYou 28 points 5 hours ago (33|5)  Feminists always say shit like "I wish I could have sex with anyone I want but I can't because patriarchy!!!"  When in reality, if they live in a first world country, they can already have sex with anyone they want. But their real goal is not just to have sex, but to control other people's opinions and thoughts of them doing so. They want to silence all critics, and then even demand praise for their morally reprehensible or at least morally questionable actions, in an effort to silence their own subconscious condemnation of themselves which results in painful self-inflicted guilt and shame.  That is all it really is: they are narcissistic and want to behave immorally, but cannot escape their own guilty consciences, so they try to block out the conscience via mental gymnastics AKA hamstering.

Oh yeah. That’s where it came from. I must have been possessed.

The Red Pill subreddit, where lying to women to get them into bed is perfectly acceptable but a woman having consensual sex is a reprehensible, narcissistic slattern with a gymnastic hamster for a brain.

NOTE: I found this quote through the always helpful Blue Pill subreddit.

The No-Friend Zone

Ladies! Here, fresh from the MensRants subreddit is A Man With Whom You Do Not Want To Be Friends. Or acquaintances. Or anything, really. To be honest, you probably don’t even want this guy to spot you at a distance from the window of a speeding train. Much T.M.I. in this quote:

Why can't I be 'just friends' with a woman? (self.MensRants)  submitted 2 days ago by vestra4  I don't know, my ratio of social awkwardness - to - hormonal horniness seems so exquisitely fine-tuned, that it is hard for me to be near a woman, or talk to her, without roaring waves of sex lust filling my thoughts, and it's all I can do to keep these thoughts hidden until I am out of range of the woman, any woman, in question. Later I will undoubtably fantasize about her, just based on having been near her.  So the concept of being 'just friends' with a woman seems to me to be the most alien, self-deceiving torture I could possibly put myself through. Like eternally being in a candy store in which I cannot buy or taste the candy, like being in a library where I am not allowed to read the books.  A child who grew up going to church will say "Why yes, I believe in God" but what is it that they believe? Are they lying to themselves? Are they just saying what they have been trained to say? I never went to church and if I am asked "Do you believe in God", for me to say "Why, yes, I believe in God" would be me telling a lie, knowingly, willingly. And in a similar vein, a woman asking me "Can we be just friends?" must be met with an answer of No, for there will not be a moment of Time in which I am not pornographically violently thinking of filling her up with my seed, touching her skin, smelling her hair, sucking her breasts.  Perhaps I have too much libido, too much testosterone. How do other men do it? My mad and furious master would never allow it, and I am not sure I want to escape him, for that would mean a kind of death.

Dude, I would seriously suggest you start masturbating. A lot. Preferably not in public.

And try not to bother any actual women for a while, at least until you can start conceptualizing of them as something more than objects (like candy or books) that have been set out for you to use as you please.

Also, your “mad and furious master?” “Mad and furious master?” Did you really just write that? I think you mean your boner. If you want to get fancy, your libido. What are you, Heartiste? Can none of you idiots write about sex without getting all purple prosey on us?

Heartiste: Cunnilingus is for betas because vaginas are icky

Man horrified by glimpse of vagina.

Man horrified by glimpse of vagina.

Oh, Heartiste, sometimes I can’t help but wonder if you’ve been trolling us all along. I mean, what kind of master pickup guru is this squicked out by vaginas?

Eating a girl out anytime during the first few weeks of dating is beta. When you eat a girl out, you telegraph your incredible horniness for her. Men normally do not want to go down on women and bury their mouths in that fetid, humid mess unless they find her so overwhelmingly hot that they can’t help themselves.

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Let’s talk about sex! (With the icky, icky dudes of The Spearhead)

Those sneaky, sexy ladies, always up to something!

Those sneaky, sexy ladies, always up to something!

So over on The Spearhead, the fellas are discussing journalist Daniel Bergner’s sexy new sex book What Do Women Want?: Adventures in the Science of Female Desire. It’s a book that challenges many conventional wisdoms, both scientific and popular, about sexuality and, as Salon puts it, portrays female sexuality as essentially “base, animalistic and ravenous.”

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JudgyBitch: Wives with low libido are man-hating bigots

Dudes: If your wife isn't horny for yoy, she's probably into misandry and witchcraft and maybe Pinterest.

Dudes: If your wife isn’t horny for you, she’s probably into misandry and witchcraft and possibly even Pinterest.

In a post ostensibly about the imminent arrival of female Viagra, our dear friend JudgyBitch weighs in on yet another subject about which she knows shit: the reasons that women who are not her might not want to have sex with their husbands:

Loss of libido in women, excepting rare medical conditions, in my opinion, is a direct result of not seeing men as emotionally complex beings. If you’re married, at some point, your husband probably stood in front of you and promised to love you forever. Rejecting him physically is a very wounding thing to do. It hurts. Sex is one of the most important, intimate ways married couples show that they love one another. Refusing to have sex with your husband is telling him, in a very painful way, that you don’t love him. That you don’t care for him or about him.

Huh. If I hadn’t seen her on video, thus confirming her status as an adult human female, I would have a hard time believing that it was an actual woman saying this and not some horny, creepy teenage boy in the process of trying to manipulate his girlfriend into “going all the way.”

Oh, but she’s got more:

I guess the only way to justify that is to think of men as emotionless. It doesn’t hurt men to be rejected because they don’t feel anything to begin with.

Really? The only way to justify saying “no” to your husband when you don’t want to have sex with him is if you convince yourself he’s emotionless? But women should just force themselves to say “yes” to sex when they don’t want to and simply endure what follows?

That’s the ugly little reality behind female viagara. Will it actually boost women’s libido? Who knows. What difference will it make, though, if women are going to continue to see men as less than completely human? That’s the real problem.

Does anyone know where to get irony meters at a reasonable price? Mine just leapt off the table, ran around the room screaming, and exploded.

 

On Slate, daddy blogger Andy Hinds guiltily wrestles with his sexual fantasies, wants us all to watch

Ogling: People do it.

Ogling: People do it. They just don’t all feel the need to write about it on Slate.

In Slate, writer Andy Hinds has provided us all with one of the most cringe-inducing “unsolicited penis updates” since our old friend Paul Elam filled us in on which “fuckmuffin” body parts make his Little Elam happiest.

Hinds starts off by assuring us he’s one of the feminist Good Guys, a stay-at-home-dad who respects the heck out of the ladies:

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An Unsolicited Update from Paul Elam’s P*nis

askmeaboutweiner

Regular readers of this blog, for better or worse, know one thing that makes “Men’s Human Rights Activist” Paul Elam’s penis happy: The prospect of harassing feminists. He is, after all, the man who wrote of one feminist that “that the idea of fucking your shit up gives me an erection.”

Now Mr. Elam has given us a rather more complete account of what it is that pleases his penis. I’m not sure there was any great demand for this information, but he has chosen to release it, and so here we are.

In a post with the tasteful title “on tits, ass and fucktards,” Elam informs the world that he is in fact a fan of the first two items in this list – that is, tits and ass. He is also, he goes on to explain, a lover of

Sorry, I have to stop for a moment to remind you that you are about to read about things that give Paul Elam — yes THAT Paul Elam — a boner.

I will not think any less of you if you stop reading right here.

If you are ready and willing to continue, here we go:

I like well-formed thighs that lead up to the promise land, and smooth knees above shapely calves. Of course, all that combined with a woman’s pretty face is a crowning glory; full lips that promise supple kisses and great blow jobs, clear eyes and unblemished skin. All this combines to make a woman utterly fuckable, and visually that is what I like most of all. I like to look at women that are little fuckmuffins.

Yes, he actually wrote all that, attached his name to it, and posted it for other people to see.

But as much as Elam likes to look at “little fuckmuffins” he does not actually seem to like most of them very much.

After roughly 150  words devoted mostly to cataloguing his favorite female body parts, Elam evidently runs out of nice things to say about women, and so he returns again to his favorite pastime, devoting the bulk of the post to a rant explaining how much he hates “feminist fucktards,” traditionalist women, and women with Facebook accounts.

While happy enough with “fuckmuffins [who] are sexually liberated and adventurous” and who “like to please and be pleased,” Elam informs the world that he feels no such love for all those awful “fuckmuffins” who “liv[e] life with prudish sticks up their asses made from the same wood that forms the chips on their shoulders.”

He’s also mighty pissed at all those who aren’t interested in hearing him expound at length on what his penis likes.

Of the now almost endless list of things that have grown annoyingly stupid and sanctimonious about feminism is the Victorianesque shaming of my sexual programming as a man. Even with the so called “sex positive” feminists, the most hypocritical assholes of them all, the only positive sexuality they embrace is that of women. To them, male sexuality, in all its glory, is something to be buried, controlled and allowed to surface only when it serves the sexual needs of some narcissistic, horny, self-absorbed little “sex positive” princess.

Unfortunately, more traditional-minded women aren’t much interested in hearing about his penis either. And for some reason they, like feminists, think that there might be some sort of connection between men and rape.

Who are those traditionalists? You will know them by their obsequious silence while feminists shame men for committing the scurrilous act of looking at women sexually. Or better yet, as they join in with their “men can stop rape” bedfellows to twist and distort the natural inclinations of young men with Puritan sexual guilt that marches in lockstep with the feminist hatred of male sexuality.

Elam stops for a moment to reassure his readers that despite all that stuff about “well-formed thighs” and blow-job lips he prefers Good Women to mere “fuckmuffins.”

Now, all that being said, is woman-as-fuckmuffin all I care about? Hardly. As a matter of fact, I would throw fuckmuffin to the curb faster than you can say “patriarchy” to spend time with a woman of good character and intelligence. I have learned in life that my dick has a healthy agenda for humanity, but not necessarily for me. So as my values have matured, so has my taste in women.

Heck, it turns out he actually sort of hates “fuckmuffin.” After all, he tells us,

fuckmuffin … is prone to act indignant when she feels sexualized (by the wrong guy). She can become so angry at being “objectified” that you can see her tits shake right through that tight sweater with the neckline that plunges to the vicinity of her toes.

And then he compares her to a bug:

Time and experience will lead [men] to understand that fuckmuffin should be regarded with same respect as you would afford a stinging insect.

Basically, he explains, the only problem with lustful young men who ogle women is that they haven’t learned to hate women enough quite yet. And so women shouldn’t complain when young guys stare at them. Or when they don’t. As far as I can figure it, he thinks women shouldn’t ever complain about anything.

Leave [young men] the fuck alone. There is nothing wrong with them. Nothing needs to be fixed. If you want to help a young man like that, just start encouraging him to connect the dots between fuckmuffin’s propensity to take her own picture and post it to Facebook four times a day and her ultimate tendency to make him miserable. Eventually he will get the connection. And if he doesn’t, maybe that makes him happy. Either way, it is none of your fucking business.

And so ends what’s probably the strangest work of erotica I think I’ve ever read.

The Thinking Housewife: Women in combat means women using … BIRTH CONTROL! Eek!

No, seriously, this band is called Birth Control.

No, seriously, this band is called Birth Control.

Unsurprisingly, our old friend “The Thinking Housewife” is aghast at the notion of women serving in combat. What is a little surprising is why. In one of her many recent posts on the subject she offers this unique take on the subject:

There are so many unexamined consequences of the full integration of women into the military that one barely knows where to start, but one of the obvious places is with the fact that the Armed Forces will be increasingly in the business of population control.

Yes, that’s right: women in combat means women using birth control. The horror!

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