Category Archives: PUA
My Seed Is Gold: A Saruman-esque Dramatic Reading
Saruman contemplating his Holy Yogurt
The dude who reads ridiculous man rants on the Internet in a voice vaguely resembling that of legendary actor Christopher Lee as Saruman has brought us all a little gift this morning: A nearly ten-minute dramatic reading of “My Seed is Liquid Fucking Gold” by LaidNYC.
Now all we need to do is to convince the dude who does those True Facts videos to do one.
Slut face, hairy arms and feminism: all signs she’s a slut?
Possible slut.
Over on Roosh’s Return of Kings blog, a dude who calls himself Tuthmosis has provided a useful list of “24 Signs She’s A Slut” in order to help aspiring PUAs to figure out whether or not the HB 6 they’ve been negging all night is going to eventually succumb to their drunken, er, “charms.”
Much of the list is basically rehashed PUA conventional wisdom: sluts have tattoos and lots of piercings; they dye their hair unnatural colors, wear revealing clothes, and have daddy issues.
PUAs really have a thing about women with tattoos, huh?
Pickup artist: “My seed is liquid gold and I don’t give it out like its god damn tap water.”
LaidInNYC has definitely been here.
Our friend LaidNYC — the “Don’t Marry Women Over 25“ guy — is back with another amazing post. In this one, he expounds at length on the worth of his sperm. Which is apparently ALOT.
Sorry. A LOT.
Let’s let him explain:
I don’t give a shit about sex. Any broad can spread her legs.
You know what I do care about? Holding girls to a higher standard.
Why? Because my seed is liquid fucking gold and I don’t give it out like its god damn tap water.
And … I’ve already lost my appetite for dinner.
Red Piller: Evil sluts not only want to have sex but actually want people not to hate them for it.
Men: Can also engage in hamstering
So the Red Pill subreddit, as you may recall, is a place for dudes to discuss the devious and possibly not altogether ethical or even consensual strategies they’ve come up with to … have sex with anyone they want. But their real goal is not just to have sex, but to control other people’s opinions and thoughts of them doing so. They want to silence all critics, and then even demand praise for their morally reprehensible or at least morally questionable actions.
Woah. It feels like my brain was just taken over for a second. Did I even write that? I don’t think I did. I swear I’ve read most of that paragraph before.
Oh wait.
Oh yeah. That’s where it came from. I must have been possessed.
The Red Pill subreddit, where lying to women to get them into bed is perfectly acceptable but a woman having consensual sex is a reprehensible, narcissistic slattern with a gymnastic hamster for a brain.
NOTE: I found this quote through the always helpful Blue Pill subreddit.
Heartiste: Hitler was a bitter Beta Male who wouldn’t have started WW2 if he’d read my pickup artist blog
But I’m a Nice Guy! Why won’t she date me?
Some people dream of going back in a time machine and strangling baby Hitler in his crib, thus preventing World War II, the Holocaust, any number of stupid memes. Our dear friend Heartiste — the repellent right-wing pickup guru — dreams instead of delivering the incredibly wussy teenage Hitler his own Sixteen Commandments of Poon, thus saving young Adolph from the horrors of Betahood and perhaps also preventing World War II, etc.
Heartiste, who evidently gets his news from seven-year-old stories in the Daily Mail, has been reading about a not-so-new book that tells the story of teenage Hitler’s unrequited crush on a girl named Stefanie Isak. To hear the Daily Mail tell it, Hitler was quite the beta simp, watching from a distance in fury as alpha male army officers charmed (and won over) the young lass. Heartiste is driven to comment:
Roosh V forum members baffled that fat woman doesn’t welcome sexual harassment
Online dating: It doesn’t always work like this.
For a certain subset of horrible men, there are few things more infuriating than the fact that women they find undesirable can turn down men for sex. For this upsets their primitive sense of justice: such women should be so grateful for any male attention, these men think, that turning down even the most boorish of men shouldn’t even be an option for them.
Consider the reactions of some of the regulars on date-rapey pickup guru Roosh V’s forum to the story of Josh and Mary on the dating site Plenty of Fish. One fine December evening, you see, Josh decided to try a little “direct game” on Mary.
That’s what the fellas on Roosh’s forum call it, anyway. The rest of us would call it sexual harassment.
The Most Alpha Male Book Cover Ever?
Out of my way, puny beta fountain!
This is the actual cover for a little self-published alpha-male how-to book I found on Amazon, and I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a more awesome book cover in my life.
I mean, let’s just start with the fact that becoming an Alpha Male apparently makes you literally a giant, and somehow in the process removes any shadows or reflections that you might have previously cast upon the world. And it makes you irresistible to similarly gigantic women, provided they are standing at an angle that bears no relation to earth gravity and lit by their own light source.
And then there’s the weirdly ambiguous title of the book, which suggests you are becoming an Alpha Male for other men.
The book description is pretty awesome as well.
HOW TO BECOME AN ALPHA MALE FOR TODAY’S MAN. How to become an alpha male is the trending topic among men all across the world today. In this book you will find an easy to follow simplified guide to transforming into the man whom women are diligently seeking after but fail to find.
Why would you want to turn yourself into a man the women can’t find?
This informative book will satisfy your quest for who you are. You are an alpha male who deserves the excitement and pleasure and all the luxuries the life of an alpha male have to offer.
Like the luxury of expanding to THREE TIMES NORMAL HUMAN SIZE!
You will find proven techniques that will save you valuable time and money also sure fire methods that will guarantee promising results. Based on extensive and expensive field research the author T.Mills have scientifically gathered useful data that have been tried and tested with striking results.
Apparently he never tried and tested his promotional copy with a copy editor, though.
After reading this book you will find yourself excited about becoming an alpha male. Imagine being in control of unlimited pleasure. Your desires fulfilled simply by applying these step by step methods. Having your way in every situation without worrying about the threat of opposition. This is the life of an alpha male. How To Become An Alpha Male For Today’s Man contains the necessary tools in an intimate one on one encounter within this book.
Wait, what? Is he suggesting that we … have sex with the book?
Because that works for me. This book cover is just that irresistible.
I might even have to procure this work of literature and read it, or something.
Don’t call her “baby.” No, seriously, don’t.
Unless you’re Kojak. Kojak gets a free pass with the word “baby.”
So I read a lot of creepy shit doing research for this blog. But the manosphere blog Random Xpat Rantings — slogan: “Contemplative dominance for the modern man” — seems to be trying to take creepiness to a whole other level.
In a recent post, blogger xsplat attempts to explain “How to make an attractive woman fall for you on the first or second date.” One of his hints: “If you are way into the girl, it will be way easier for her to fall for you.”
But what if you’re dead inside and can’t feel love? Well, have no fear, because xsplat has an answer for you: Pretend that the women you’re dating are your children!
If you don’t know how to feel love, here is a trick that will work for some, if you let it. Men naturally feel paternal love. Women are neotenous. Evolution is accidental, however the coincidence is meaningful. Women are neotenous because that arouses men’s paternal love. Use that to your advantage. Consider her as YOUR child. This will open up a flood of love for her. It’s ok – it’s not real incest – don’t be an idiot. It’s a trick you are performing in order to commune more fully. To love her more. To enjoy for yourself the great rush of love.
Also, I have a long history of doing this, again and again. It’s not just an accident in my distant past. It’s what I do. It’s what I did today. It’s a formula. It’s a formula that might very well work for you.
If you’re giving out dating advice and you have to specify “it’s ok — it’s not real incest” you should probably start trying to figure out just how your life has gone so terribly, terribly wrong.
Red Pill Dudes: Marriage is worse than rape, but the feminist attack on marriage is even worser
Barley: The ultimate feminist weapon?
So the uber-manly woman-hating woman-chasing alpha dogs over in the Red Pill subreddit are discussing the declining marriage rate. Which is a GOOD thing. Because marriage is for BETAs and FRUMPY WOMEN! It’s worse than RAPE!
![Marriage is RAPE - so if marriage goes down, then it's a good thing. permalink source give gold save hide child comments [–]Max___Power 49 points 1 day ago (64|15) No, it's worse. Marriage is institutionally promoted to men as a positive. If I ever took a contract to my lawyer where the other party could opt out at any time AND take 50% of MY shit with them, he'd chase me out of his office and yell at me to find a hobby. Yet men willingly purchase $30,000 flawed rocks for the privilege of asking a frumpy woman to sign such a contract. LO freaking L, I don't know whether to laugh or cry.](http://manboobz.files.wordpress.com/2013/08/wnosemarriagerape.png?w=604)
Huh. If any of these Red Pill dudes were to get married I’m pretty sure it would be be a completely, you know, consensual act on their part. Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t rape a, you know, nonconsensual thing? (Reading the Red Pill subreddit, it’s sometimes hard to remember.)
At this point a fellow calling himself TheZimmerMan throws in his two cents on the subject. Like his fellow Red Pill alpha dudes, he’s no fan of marriage. But then he remembers that feminists are supposedly plotting to take down western civilization by destroying marriage. And feminists are bad, right? And so his brain sort of explodes, producing this wondrous bit of red pill word salad, sprinkled liberally with racism as well as misogyny:
Wow. Just wow.
I’ve never seen “Disney” used as a verb before.
Also, I’m not exactly sure what “they want everyone to be on welfare barley subsiding” means. Unless the government has started up some sort of barley redistribution system I can only assume he meant “barely subsisting.”
I also like the complaint about how the “actual working man” pays for all these evil welfare moms while “being denied traditional provider respect and benefits.”
In misogynist-speak, that’s code for “how come we have to pay money for welfare when we don’t even get to fuck the welfare moms and boss them around?”
Red Pill dudes: please continue your marriage strike. Also consider: A vow of silence? Moving to a desert island? Living the rest of your life in a hole in the ground?
(Thanks to Gemma_Lou in the Blue Pill subreddit for pointing me to this wondrous Red Pill discussion.)
Pickup guru and raving racist Heartiste warns his followers of the impending Whitepocalypse
So just move into your underground bunkers already, angry white dudes.
Over on Chateau Heartiste, the Heartiste formerly known as Roissy is in full-blown white supremacist mode today.
Apparently what got dear old Mr. H in an especially racist mood was a comment from a reader called Libertardian who suggested that, while in the good old days, civilization used to rein in the alleged worst tendencies of women, “in the West we had to abolish civilization because it was hurting people’s feelings.”
This little comment was enough to send Mr. H into a full-blown keyboard-smash Whitepocalypse rage.
