Category Archives: penises

Red Pill Woman warns evil sluts that “every penis you put in yourself breaks your heart a little.”

TempestTcup10 Endorsed Contributor 44 points 8 hours ago*  Unless you are the type of person who can have sex without any sort of feelings attached, every penis you put in yourself breaks your heart a little.  You should feel like being only with your SO is a very special gift instead of a burden.

You’re a heartbreaker, love taker

Today I thought I’d highlight this lovely “Red Pill” insight from one of the gals on the Red Pill Women subreddit, a weird sort of Women’s Auxilliary to the Red Pill subreddit that devotes itself to “objectively and realistically discuss[ing] sexual strategy from an anti-feminist, non-feminist, traditionalist and/or evolutionary psychology perspective.”

Which basically means a lot of slut-shaming.

Yep. The Red Pill dudes fill their subreddit with advice on how to stuff their penises into as many HB8’s as possible; meanwhile, Red Pill women attack these same women as penis-stuffing sluts who will end up miserable in the end and sort of deserve it for being such penis-stuffing sluts.

While I have no problem with penis-stuffing, I would like to warn all penis-stuffers, male or female: Make sure every penis you’re stuffing into yourself has a flared base, otherwise they could easily get stuck up in there somewhere.

And now I find myself thinking of Pat Benatar’s famous ode to heartbreaking penises.

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MGTOW warns women: By supporting gay rights, you’ll turn more men gay, and then they won’t marry you! Ha ha

Uh oh!

Uh oh!

Hey ladies who support gay rights! Has it ever occurred to you that by supporting gay rights, you’ll end up turning more men gay, and then there won’t be any straight men left to marry you?

Wait, you’re saying that hasn’t occurred to you?

Well, it’s definitely occurred to some dude who calls himself Aper on the MGTOWHQ forum. Let’s let him explain: Read the rest of this entry

Pickup artistry is like waggling your penis in front of a cat, explains pickup artist who may not have ever met a cat

You definitely do not want this happening to your penis.

You definitely do not want this happening to your penis.

So over on Chateau Heartiste, Mr. Heartiste is trying to explain a highly innovative pickup strategy that you may know as “playing hard to get.”

First he tries a “fishing” metaphor, quoting from a commenter on his site who wrote:

It’s like fishing. You don’t just jerk your line out of the water as soon as you can. That’s how you get a broken line and lose an expensive lure. You jerk her in slowly letting the fish tire herself out. Once she’s sufficiently submissive then it’s time for the net.

Then, presumably, you gut her and fry her up in a pan?

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The 5 Creepiest Details from GQ’s Long-Awaited Account of A Voice for Men’s Conference Last Summer

A Voice for Men's Paul Elam: Still not ready for his closeup

A Voice for Men’s Paul Elam: Still not ready for his closeup

A few days before alleged “men’s human rights” website A Voice for Men held its first convention last summer, the site’s founder and head boy Paul Elam put up a post imploring the alleged human rights activists planning to attend the event not to go around calling women bitches and whores and cunts, because the news media would be there, and this might make his little human rights movement look bad.

I’m paraphrasing here; Elam was a teensy bit more euphemistic, telling his followers that anyone caught “trash-talking women, men, making violent statements … anything that can be used against us” would get a very stern talking-to and, if they persisted, would be asked to leave.

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Criticized for posting a puffball interview with PUA dirtbag Roosh V, Paul Elam reassures readers he knows how to get his dick wet

Paul Elam: The ladies want summa dis

Paul Elam: The ladies want summa dis

A couple of days ago, A Voice for Men posted the first half of what will evidently be a nine-zillion-word interview with none other than Roosh Valizadeh — you know, the far-right racist shithead who just semi-seriously proposed legalizing rape as a way, he says, to end it. Oh, and he also once admitted to raping a woman.

While AVFM is pretty hateful itself, some MRAs were a bit nonplussed to see a post on the most influential Men’s Rights site on the internet describing Roosh, who’s also repeatedly attacked the Men’s Rights movement, as “a layered, tempered and earnest guy, who truly wants to help other men in their most basic and primal of life goals; a deep thinker, a powerful communicator … I got nothing but respect for the guy.”

Over on the Men’s Rights subreddit, a couple of commenters raked AVFM and its Maximum Leader over the coals for opening his site up to a dude whose ideology is hard to distinguish from actual fascism.  Lauzon, a feminism-hating subreddit regular, wrote:

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Dirty laundry! Was John Hembling booted from A Voice for Men for criticizing Janet Bloomfield and Stefan Molyneux?

Longtime observers of A Voice for Men have been wondering for some time why John “The Other” Hembling has vanished from that site. Hembling, once the site’s Editor in Chief and number two figure, was not at AVFM’s much ballyhooed conference this summer, and his name has mysteriously vanished from the masthead. AVFM has not, to the best of my knowledge, ever offered a public explanation for the falling-out with Hembling.

Now, after months of silence on the topic, Hembling is telling his side of the story.

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If you can’t be with the dick you love, love the dick you’re with

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What do women want? One woman-hating man has the answer!

Fellas! If you’ve got a girlfriend, and you don’t want to lose her, don’t ever leave her alone for more than a few days at a time, because if you do, she’ll feel so penis-deprived that she’ll cheat on you with whatever penis-having person she can get her hands on first.

That, at least, is the contention of C. M. Sturges, the woman-hating, gun-loving founder of the blog Apocalypse Cometh. And you can trust his insights on all things related to relationships because, as he boasts,

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Better Penis Homes and Gardens

The wrong kind of sexy House

The wrong kind of sexy House

The We Hunted the Mammoth Pledge Drive continues! If you haven’t already, please consider sending some bucks my way. (And don’t worry that the PayPal page says Man Boobz.) Thanks!

While we’re on the subject of creepy dudes and their terrible opinions about vaginas, I feel I would be remiss not to mention the whole “penis home” thing.

What penis home thing, you ask? Well, you may have heard about the recent fall from grace (oy there’s a cliché) of evangelical megachurch pastor Mark Driscoll, under fire for being a tyrannical buttheaded bigot with terrible opinions about women and LGBT folks. With Driscoll also facing accusations of abusive behavior, financial hanky panky, and even plagiarism, his Washington-based Mars Hill evangelical empire has been forced to shut down some of its local franchises.

Ok, you say, that’s sort of interesting, but what does it have to do with penis homes? I specifically asked about penis homes.

All right, penis homes. Some years back, Driscoll outlined what he saw as the proper Christian roles for our penises and vaginas. In a post on an internet message board from 2001 that’s recently been brought to the attention of the wider world, he offered these thoughts on (cis) men and the proper homes for their penises:

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Gamebro Redditor laments: “I’m not going to get the job … Cause I’m a penis, and that’s all I am.”

How women get ahead in the workplace, according to men who hate women

How women get ahead in the workplace, according to men who hate women and don’t know shit about anything

A bitter gamebro wandered into the Men’s Rights subreddit last night to deposit an angry little manifesto on the evils of women and Social Justice Warriors. He didn’t get a terribly friendly reception from the regulars — last I checked he’d been voted down to zero — but his manifesto is such a classic example of self-pitying gamebro misogyny that I sort of felt obliged to bring it to you all here.

Are you sitting comfortably? Good. Then let’s begin.

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Attention Heartiste: Don Draper is not an actual person

The REAL thousand-cock stare

The REAL thousand-cock stare

One of the odder folk beliefs of the pickup artist subculture is that women become worn down and used up and even a bit addled if they have sex with too many men. Men, by contrast, are said to be able to handle an equal number of female lovers with grace and aplomb.

In a recent post, our old friend Heartiste offers what he sees as decisive photographic evidence illustrating the different effects of promiscuity on men and women. One bit of this evidence: a picture of a young woman used to advertise some sort of singles event. Reflections from the photographer’s lights obscure her pupils, an offputting effect that gives her a slightly deranged look.

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