By David Futrelle
Over on The Daily Stormer, they’re always on the lookout for dire new threats to the white race, and regular DS contributor Michael Byron thinks he’s found one: Pierce Brosnan’s wife.
You see, the 53-year old wife of the 64-year old former James Bond star is, well, fat. And Byron seems to feel this is a terrible injustice not just to Mr. Brosnan but to the white race in general, despite the fact that 1) Mr. Brosnan and his wife seem perfectly happy together and 2) it’s likely that a lot of Daily Stormer readers are themselves fat, given that most white Americans (like most Americans in general) are technically overweight.
As Byron sees it, though, Keely Shaye Smith essentially pulled off a bait-and-switch.
This woman managed to snag a handsome, famous multi-millionaire actor when she was an unknown environmental correspondent for ABC back in the mid-1990s. …
After marrying Brosnan in 2001, there was one thing – one thing – she needed to do to remain attractive and presentable to her husband and the public: not stuff her face with Twinkies every day.
Could she do it?
No; apparently that requires too much self-discipline.
Byron, who seems perplexed that Brosnan hasn’t already divorced “Shamu,” thinks he should have put something in their pre-nup to protect himself against the terrible injustice of his wife gaining weight.
Ideally, Brosnan should have included a clause in his prenuptial agreement stating that if his wife became seven pounds heavier than her ideal weight, the marriage becomes null and void and the woman has no claim to his fortune or their children.
In fact, all White men who want to get married should do this.
It’s essentially a biological version of a stop-loss, and the prospect of getting divorced due to fatness will shame all married women into remaining human-sized.
Naturally, most of the Daily Stormer’s commenters side with Byron on the Fat Wife question, filling the comments with fat jokes and calls for WHITE SHARIA to declare fat white women illegal.
More than a few blamed Brosnan for not forcing his wife to stay slim.
“He shouldn’t have ever let her get that fat,” complained someone calling himself Hierophant14.
It is far easier for a woman to get 15 pounds off than 900 pounds. She benefits from being thin, make sure her stupid ass stays thin. “I love your hot THIN body, babe.” You always use this line while they are thin to keep them this way. It’s not rocket science.
Others questioned Brosnan’s masculinity.
“Her shoulders are wider than his, guess we know who the Alpha in the relationship is,” quipped USMCvet.
But a significant portion of the Daily Stormer commentariat felt that the fat shamers weren’t giving Smith enough credit for being, you know, white. And a producer of white babies.
“She’s white, had white kids,” noted someone called myself.
Yeah she’s a fat whale now, but if he’s fine with it, i don’t really care. He could be married to a n*gger, a jew, having no children and having a porn star life with drugs and hookers, but that doesn’t seem to be the case. Imo best case scenario is having a good looking white wife and children, second best is having a not so good looking wife and children. Life isn’t perfect so there’s that.
Zaros similarly gave Brosnan points for not divorcing his wife.
Good on him. A n*gger would walk out in his wife and kids. An honourable white man would never. We all go on about fatherless children and the problems this causes, at least he is doing his job as a father and husband. He obviously needs some help with the white sharia aspect of things and she needs to lay off the sausage rolls
FordHenry appealed to white pride:
Man loves his chubby wife and is faithful.
Same deal man goes bald and she sticks by him
This is how WHITE PEOPLE ACT
Someone called Mencken (presumably not the long-dead American gadfly journalist) warned younger white supremacists that they might make a rude discovery once their own hypothetical wives get a little older.
You’ll cowards are in for a big surprise, no pun intended. Because after your [National Socialist] dream girl becomes your wife and churns out your four or five children, she’s going to find her shape redefined, and you’re going to find her pussy will be like the top of a rubber boot.
Reltihlieh was philosophical about it all.
I like the fact that they are happily married. Feminism and Jewish brainwashing have resulted in countless failed marriages and broken families. Some “couples” file for divorce within a month of two of the nuptials. …
That said, yes, women should look after their weight unless there is some medical condition or something which caused them to become so huge after a certain age.
As Reltihlieh sees it, married white dudes have a duty as well — to have sex as often as possible with their wives before they get old and (probably) fat.
And with that said, men who get married should endeavor to get the maximum sexual mileage out of their wives’ young bodies so that when she does in fact become fat (for whatever reason), he can reminisce and derive quiet satisfaction from having got the most sexual mileage out of her body when it was in its prime!
So on one side, we’ve got a group of mostly-older white supremacists who combine their virulent racism with a certain old-fashioned paternalism towards women of their own race; on the other, a younger group, who came of age on 4chan and in GamerGate rather than Stormfront, who seem to hate white women nearly as much as they hate those of other races and religions.
In whatever battle ultimately ensues between these two groups, I can only hope that everyone loses.