Categories
mansplaining misogyny MRA oppressed white men parody patronizing as heck scott adams

Dilbert + Scott Adams’ Insufferable Mansplainations = MRA Dilbert. Perfect!

Note: Scott Adams actually believes this

The We Hunted the Mammoth Pledge Drive is on! If you haven’t already, support this blog by donating through the PayPal button below. Thanks!

Today’s amazing thing on the Internet: MRA Dilbert, a new Tumblr blog that mixes the art of Scott Adams’ Dilbert comic strips with Adams’ ludicrous, insufferable, and actually completely serious opinions on such subjects as women, women, and women.

It’s pretty awesome. I’m just jealous that I did’t think of it first.

Subscribe
Notify of
guest

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

117 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
4 years ago

You kinda mentioned them there, yeah. But hey, I learned a thing from it. Not necessarily a thing I wanted to know existed, but can’t just learn the happy fuzzy things in life!

“70% born to single mothers”

Yeah, that’s bullshit. Even if the number is valid, it’s meaningless. You’ve got people like my ex — his parents married after he was born (but before his sisters were, the last name situation is weird). And people like my aunt and her 20+ year long relationship with her boyfriend where it’s a bit “we’re just calling him her husband right?” And widows, and rape victims, and people who would marry but can’t at present. Basically what I’m saying here is that the legal paperwork behind your mother’s relationship status is a meaningless thing — unmarried but committed trumps married to an asshole, f’ex.

(Have I mentioned that my father is, to quote my mother who is still married to him, a dickweasel? I cracked up at that one.)

Lkeke35
Lkeke35
4 years ago

Argentina: Good answer. I call bullshit on that 70% number as being meaningless. I know plenty of couples who are not married but the fathers are still devoted to their kids. I know plenty of couples who are not married but have been together for five years or more. My brother has been with his long term girlfriend for nearly twenty years.

In fact, there was some sort of poll that showed black men might not be married to the mothers of their children, but they were more involved in their children’s lives than any other racial group. (I need to find that study. I know I saw it.) So yeah, I think Bryce needs to dig a little deeper into the stats. It’s a lot more complicated than that.

Here it is, from the CDC:

http://www.dailykos.com/story/2015/5/13/1383179/-The-absent-black-father-myth-debunked-by-CDC

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
4 years ago

Lkeke — I remember reading that! It had totally slipped my mind!

But yeah, not legally recognized as married by the state =/= not involved in the kid’s life.

In other things, who needs a feel good cry? And don’t panic at the opening image, the little critter is alive and survives.

http://youtu.be/FH2zbHrRY9A

Frank Torpedo
4 years ago

@Lkeke35

Huh, I wonder what that means for all the saddos who keep saying that gay/trans black people are the direct result of single moms.

Someone else shall have to bear the brunt of their misguided rage.

Gettin’ real sick and tired of hearing people trying to ‘blame’ LGBT behavior on something, for my part.

Lkeke35
Lkeke35
4 years ago

Frank:
I don’t think words can express just how much I hate Umar Johnson and his brainless followers. I work with a couple of people who are just as mindless in following him, and hang on everything he says, just as much as Trump’s followers do.

I first heard about him when one of my co-workers kept mentioning him, and that I should give him a listen. I did and thought that his ideas about race and homosexuality to be vile and stupid. It helped that I’d studied the topic of homosexuality for years, from accredited sources, (and not just dismissed those sources because the writers were white.)

I’ve found that these people do no deeper studying of any of these issues, beyond simply parroting what they are told, by people like Johnson, (who has his own sexual issues and looks to make a buck), and then such people have the nerve to express disdain for me, for daring to take a much wider view of sexual and gender issues, and thinking beyond Egypt, as the end all and be all of the ‘verse.

Incidentally, for those not in the know, this is why they’re called Hoteps. Such people don’t study or believe anything about the world, unless they can relate it to ancient Egypt, somehow. They claim to be uplifting and celebrating the black race but really just come across as fundamentalist Christians. They blame everything wrong (and LGBTQ issues are considered wrong) with the black community on white people. They replace the bible with semi-scholarly works, written by hacks who claim to be Drs, about ancient Egypt.

Sorry for the rant but I see these kind of people everyday and everyone of them is fanatically ignorant. (Even, sadly, the supposedly educated ones.)

Oh and sorry Argenti! My spell-correct hates me and most names.

Frank Torpedo
4 years ago

@Lkeke35

Please don’t worry about it – it warms the cockles of my heart to hear that you find THE PRINCE OF PANAFRIKANISM, DR. EMPEROR UMAR JOHNSON as grating and vomitous as I do.

I can’t deal with him, or the Irritated Genie, Ayo Kimathi.

(and not just dismissed those sources because the writers were white.)

I was complaining about this in the same thread I linked. While there are cases of white people printing blatant misinformation, one plus one does not cease to equal two simply because a white man said so. Nor does gravity cease to exist because a white man proved its existence.

These people like to say nonsensical, grandstanding things, like, “GET RID OF ALL BOOKS AND MEDIA IN YOUR HOUSE THAT HAVEN’T BEEN CREATED BY BLACK PEOPLE!”

One, that’s bollocks.

Two, information does not cease to be information because of the author’s race.

They really overdo it. They insist that we shouldn’t watch movies with white people in them, avoid reading books with white characters, avoid being taught ANY SUBJECT by a white person…it’s a twisty and deep rabbit hole, and not one I feel up to exploring simply so that I can be More Black Than You.

Hell, some of them don’t even want you to know about any other culture than KEMETIC EGYPTIAN CULTURE. They’ll say shit like, “Why do you know about European History? LEARN OURSTORY!”

Yeah, because knowing about the Battle of Hastings means I’m an Oreo-cookie Fake Black Person who Hates Himself. /sarcasm.

Sure thing, pal. Whatever you say.

They replace the bible with semi-scholarly works, written by hacks who claim to be Drs, about ancient Egypt.

This is why I tend to choke on the rhetoric of certain individuals who like to say that we should buy more books by black authors, because 50% of the books are chock-full on nonsensical fanfiction-type bullshit about Ancient Kemet (egypt is the white man’s word for kemet!!!1), and I really don’t feel like playing host to that kind of nonsense.

If I wanted to read a fantasy book, I’d read a fantasy book – not a fantasy book masquerading as a Black History Book.

Have you heard of Dr. Mwalimu Baruti? He’s like a Umar-Lite, except, ye gods, the man is an actual Professor. I wouldn’t send my children to learn anything from him, not even for one million dollars and a diamond tiara.

And we ended up talking about Hoteps in this space. I’m sorry, Lkeke, I’ve failed you. :C

Frank Torpedo
4 years ago

Actual footage of a Umar Johnson meeting.

comment image

Umar = Raptor Jesus
Kids = his sycophantic followers

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
4 years ago

Lkeke — oh no worries on the nym, I’m used to autocorrect deciding I’m a country in South America! Or a drink. Years ago, here actually, the Argentini was deemed to be mango juice and vodka ^.^

Frank Torpedo — I’m pretty sure the kids in that gif are from the Jesus Camp documentary (which I still haven’t watched in full, really should already!)… which makes you Not Even Wrong, I think.

As for Hoteps, I took four years of Latin, which included that fun period of Roman emperors shagging their way through Egypt and Cleopatra being one savvy fucking lady, so the Greco-Roman // Egypt interplay interests me, even if it leaves me going “uh…I realize I’m white, but I’m pretty sure your history is a bit, um, how to say this… muddled”. Anyways, I tend to get all my feminist news from WHTM, so when it gets intersectional my interest is piqued!

Frank Torpedo
4 years ago

Incidentally, for those not in the know, this is why they’re called Hoteps. Such people don’t study or believe anything about the world, unless they can relate it to ancient Egypt, somehow. They claim to be uplifting and celebrating the black race but really just come across as fundamentalist Christians. They blame everything wrong (and LGBTQ issues are considered wrong) with the black community on white people. They replace the bible with semi-scholarly works, written by hacks who claim to be Drs, about ancient Egypt.

Some of them also say “HOTEP!” at the ends of their sentences.

They have really weird propensities about making up their own words, as well. It’s very strange.

*puts on a Dashiki, is named Pharaoh Frank-tank-hamun*

Hotep, my Kings and Queens. I’m about to make you Overstand my Scientifical Melaninated Innerstanding of the World. Hotep!

The White Man is trying to Feminize all Black Men via the Alabastardized White Euro-fuckery of Gayness, to prevent our Kings and Queens from making strong black Princesses and Princes. Hotep!

Black Wombyn Queens need to make me a sandwich and let me ejaculate in their vaginas as often as possible. Hotep!

I’m getting nauseous typing this garbage. Hotep!

Frank Torpedo
4 years ago

Holy shit, you guys.

Argenti. Lkeke.

I think I just stumbled over something YOOOOOOOOOOGE, as Trump would say.

Maybe…maybe Hoteps are the black equivalents of MRAs.

It’s all there – the homophobia, the misogyny, the insistence on unprotected Penis-In-Vagina sex, the misinformation, the urban legends, the willful ignorance in the face of actual events, the transphobia…

I could be wrong, but there are similarities.

Lkeke35
Lkeke35
4 years ago

And you are not wrong, although once again the issues are not quite so simple. Like I said they’re sort of like MRAs but less organized. They’re also less organized becasue not all of them can agree on what to actually believe. Some of the Hoteps believe some pretty vile stuff and a handful of them are intersectional in their beliefs and dislike the first group. There are a handful of leaders but almost none of them are intersectional. Either this is something very new or it’s something very old that’s undergoing some changes. (Although, I did hear someone say that the Hoteps remind them of those guys who read a few books in prison and now consider themselves experts on a subject, or as another person once said, “Smart Dumb People”, like that old character from In Living Color, Oswald Bates.)

http://youtu.be/Izpa9D7c77U

Frank Torpedo
4 years ago

@Lkeke35

They’re also less organized becasue not all of them can agree on what to actually believe.

This is the natural end result of them feeding themselves a steady stream of misinformation and arrant nonsense. As they say, garbage in, garbage out, and so, nothing is accomplished, because they’ve built their house on a foundation of soggy pancakes, causing all attempts at building a strong and powerful Black Community to collapse in on itself.

Oh, but you can’t say these things, or you’re a fake black person Oreo cookie.

The fact that they call each other government agents, coons, uncle toms, and so on routinely doesn’t help matters. You can’t forge an alliance with someone while your followers are screaming at each other and calling for them to be ostracized.

Either this is something very new or it’s something very old that’s undergoing some changes.

It’s actually old, in my opinion. I’m thinking about guys like Marcus Garvey, who, while being very cool and rad and having forward-thinking attitudes, held delusions about how Everything Would Be Alright If We Went Back To Africa.

Hint: No, it wouldn’t.

It spills over a little into modern-day Hotepdom, where they insist that we should all re-segregate ourselves and avoid being around people of any other race.

I’m also thinking about guys like Khalid Mohammed and Clarence 13X, both of whom existed long before Hoteps, but were essentially proto-Hotep sorts, and espoused an ideology similar to that of Hoteps, which is probably why neither of them really made a dent in the pages of history, or accomplished anything of truly enormous scope in the community.

Lkeke35
Lkeke35
4 years ago
Reply to  Frank Torpedo

If I did any of the things they suggested, my life would be immeasurably smaller and joyless. I’m a big geek girl so there’s no way in Hell I’d get rid of all my pop culture geekery. I mean they’re asking to give up Star Wars. Hell no! I prefer to focus on inclusion rather than segregation.

Incidentally, some of this type of thinking is not unlike the thinking I’ve encountered from people who don’t understand my openness. The very first time I encountered this was in kindergarten when a kid asked me why I spoke like a white girl, a question I was to be asked infrequently as I went through school, simply for speaking standard English. Or people who would disdain me for reading anything other than black writers or listening to “white people music”. These sentiments are surprisingly similar to some of the Hotep philosophies.

I never connected those attitudes to Hoteps before, but people like that do strike me as deeply provincial and small minded, not unlike the small minded, and intensely homophobic co-worker I mentioned before. What’s so sad about her: she’s a librarian with a head full of all kinds of racial, Egyptian, and medical nonsense.

Rabid Rabbit
Rabid Rabbit
4 years ago

@Lkeke35 & Frank Torpedo,

Just so you know, following this discussion is absolutely fascinating (and informative). I’m sure paying attention to it somehow makes me a dreadful appropriating colonizing keeping-you-downing white boy, but it’s interesting enough that I can’t bring myself to care at the moment.

Bryce
Bryce
4 years ago

@Frank

Oddly enough I listened to a few Khalid Mohammed speeches and interviews a few years back while reading up on the Nation of Islam (just out of curiosity). Seems like his was a wasted talent.

Kale
Kale
4 years ago

Lkeke, I appreciate you bringing this perspective to the table.

I just wanna reiterate that white people need to really listen to black people when it comes to racism, you just can’t know a fraction of what black people know about how they are treated every day. White people talking about racism might tell each other to “wake up”; but a common phrase among black people is “stay woke”, and there’s a reason for that.

Kale
Kale
4 years ago

btw I read somewhere about a professor who assigned all female lit for a year and people complained. Then she revealed that the year before she had assigned all male lit and no one complained. I heard another women on a podcast say she only read women for like five years because she had been given only men to read for so much of her schooling. I kinda respect that people might wanna limit themselves to only marginalized artists after years of white male supremacy.
Frankly, I dont feel the need to get my white feels hurt because some black people dont trust us. I don’t blame them and I kinda share the sentiment to some degree. I mean, say whatever you want about white folks, because in the end white people are doin OK and white people will be OK no matter what you say. What I have no tolerance for is white folks who think that I wanna be in their little racist white supremacist club with them.